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| I have been interested in bdsm since I was very young. I used to love to read stories about spankings, and enemas when I was a teen. I always had the interest in kinky stuff, but I didn't really understand it until the internet came out with sites for kinky interests. By that time, I was already married. I thought that since I was married, that my wife would love me and accept me for who I am, and she would eventually like what I liked. I was wrong. For many years, I kept the interest a secret. I would spend nights chatting with women and men who enjoyed spanking and other interests. And it made me crave bdsm even more. Eventually, I got the nerve to talk to my wife about it. It was very awkward, and she didn't really listen to what I was asking for. I got very depressed. I began to talk to a therapist about it. And at that point, I figured out that it was a part of me, and that I should be embracing it, not suppressing it. At that point, I saw different dominatrixes behind my wife's back to satisfy these urges. That eventually made me feel really guilty, I went back to therapy, and I knew what had to be done, but I knew it was going to break up my family. I tried it with my wife for the past 2 years. She just is not into it, and she eventually felt inadequate and resented it, and she would make excuses to avoid any bdsm activity. That brings me up to my life today. I now know what I need to do, and it is coming down to the end of our marriage. There are more than just sexual issues involved, but this is the biggest obstacle which I cannot see a solution to. So, I am in the process of leaving her, so that I may find someone with similar interests with no regrets.
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I've been looking on this site to see if there are any dominant women who might want to talk. If there are, please send me a message. I'm slowly fleshing out my vanilla interests now. I'm not sure I want to put on too many because it seems that the list can get long. |
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| Age: 44 |
| Clarksville,
Tennessee |
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