|
|
|
|
| Ah, the Venn diagrams. Where is one more likely to meet that quality, kinky, woman? On OKCupid, or Jdate, or Match, and hope you pick the needle in the haystack? Or on CM or Alt, or and hope you can pick through the myriad of fake profiles, scams, and others to find the rose among thorns (well, she can keep the thorns too).
I am seeking someone who is both a life partner, and a lifestyle partner. Someone who can appreciate the intense pleasures and excitement of an entire life together, along with the excitement and pleasure of the BDSM world. This is a daunting task.
For me, BDSM is a fun, intense, personal aspect of my life. But, a part. It is necessary, but not sufficient. There must be much more to a relationship. The kink is mostly private with some less intense public scenes a possibility. I enjoy once in a while going to the Lair (or other club) or an insight to connect with people in the scene, but I prefer to save my playing for at home, just us. As to my preferences, I am a Dom, not a sadist. I like to practice BDSM for the effect it has on you. I don't get off on hurting someone for the sake of causing pain. I think the best scenes play on the dichotomy of the mental and the physical. Whenever there is physical pleasure/pain and mental desire/hesitancy there are ripe opportunities for exploring. Plus, I think the fun part is the journey: learning and pushing limits. This is a great thing that is often overlooked. People toss about the term edge play all the time without really stopping to think about what it means. Depending on your level of experience, it could be caning, or gags, or a collar, or being hung upside down and beaten with a halibut, wrapped in barbed wire. I refuse to play the 'kinkier than thou' game. What we decide we want to do is A. Our business and; B. right for us, and doesn't make us more or less kinky than or better or worse than anyone else. As far as public, i feel similarly. I don't think it's any of the public's business what we do, nor ought they be involved. Something surreptitious can be a lot of fun, something under the clothes, or remote controlled, but I don't like blatant public displays.
|
|
|
|
