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| Owner of mentallyblonde
Still seeking a third for occasional play to soothe My Sadistic desires. I am a hard player but can play with novices. submissive/slave demeanor a must. extreme masochists prefered
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I long to be the creative sadist I used to be. Seems as though all those who are willing to take the kind of pain I enjoy delivering don't exist any longer. Might just give up on it all together |
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never talk to a police officer this way
1. I can't reach my license unless you
hold my beer . (OK in Texas)
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize
my radar detector wasn't plugged in .
3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph
to keep up with me . Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
I thought you had to be in relatively good
physical condition to be a police officer .
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!!
9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific . The
last officer only gave me a warning too!
10. Do you know why you pulled me over?
Okay, just so one of us does .
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic .
Yes, I know there are no other cars
around. That's how far ahead of me
they are.
12. When the Officer says "Gee Son...
Your eyes look red, have you been
drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond
with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed,
have you been eating doughnuts?"
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Just thought this was amusing
29 things NOT to say to your Master
1. Pushing limits does not mean making Master so angry the vein above His
right eye throbs.
2. "Quit it!", "Ow, dammit!", "I'm hiding that toy when You go to work
tomorrow", and cursing a blue streak are not safe words.
3. "Oh my God, where did You get those, they are gorgeous!!!" is not
considered boot worship.
4. "Ya want fries with that?", and "Want me to drink it for You too?" are not
appropriate remarks when Master gives you an elaborate drink order.
5. Flipping your Dominant off while your hands are cuffed behind your back is
a bad idea. Masters have ways of knowing these things.
6. Putting lube, goop, Super-glue, ink or any other substance that will sully
the hands of Master on His toys while setting up for a session is not a good
idea.
7. Kicking that toy you hate far under the bed is futile. Master will only
secure your wrist-cuffs to your ankle-cuffs and make you crawl for it...
repeatedly.
8. "Bite me!" is never an intelligent response to a command.
9. Doing your Beavis and Butthead imitation of "Fire, fire, fire, fire!"
during Master's lecture on fire-play safety is considered rude.
10. Responding with "Yes, all Wise, all knowing Grand Imperial Weenie" is not
appropriate when Master asks you if you are comfortable during a bondage
scene.
11. Asking to go to the bathroom every five minutes while Master practices His
Japanese rope work on you will try His patience.... quickly.
12. Crossing your eyes and sticking your tongue out while your Dominant is
discussing your punishment is not wise.
13. There is no such thing as slave immunity, free slave day, or the pms
defense. The slave jury might not convict you, but the Dom judge will override
the verdict. Count on it.
14. Pretending Master's collection of butt-plugs are toys and singing the
"Weebles wobble but they won't fall down" song is not a good idea.
15. Repeatedly blowing out each candle Master lights during wax play will get
you punished.
16. Checking Master's head for the 666 symbol after a harsh punishment will
only get you more of the same, or worse.
17. "I know You are but what am I?" is not the appropriate response when
called a raunchy little whore during humiliation play.
18. Using the spreader bars, paddles or canes for the fireplace is not a good
plan.
19. "Missed me, missed me, now Ya gotta kiss me" is an unacceptable remark
when Master's flogger slips.
20. When Master pulls out His bull-whip and says He wants to play, He doesn't
mean hide-and-seek. .. He will find you eventually.
21. Calling Merry Maids when you are ordered to spruce the place up is not
what your Dominant had in mind.
22. "Faster, faster, we need a new Master" is NOT the song to sing during a
session.
23. "Oh, and You think I am?" is an unacceptable response to hearing your
Dominant say He is not pleased.
24. During a play party is not the time to do your hilarious imitation of Igor
and hunch over moaning "Yes, Marster" when ordered to fetch something.
25. Adding "Sir" or "Master" to "Fuck that plan!" will not save you.
26. Singing the chorus of "Anything You Can Do, i Can Do Better" under your
breath during a session is considered foolhardy.
27. Arguing whether "Master might not be right, but Master is never wrong" as
Zen or Buddhist philosophy will only get you rewarded with kneeling in the
corner on a bed of Legos "to help you consider the question in quiet
contemplation. "
28. Reciting nursery rhymes during an interrogation scene to crack your Owner
up only lasts for so long. Then you will pay BIG.
29. Asking "Is that as HARD as You can hit??" is considered a cry for help
amongst submissive suicide prevention workers. |
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| Age: 18 |
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Illinois |
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