Happy Thanksgiving :) I am thankful for the life I've been granted, the love that surrounds me, my wonderful friends and family. 

I am especially thankful for Durango for loving me when it's hard, sticking by me when things are tough and just being my rock through everything. I love you Sir. 

I am also thankful for my girlfriend terralunagirl. I've known you for years and am so happy to be taking these new steps with you.

RKS Party next weekend :) Looking forward to spending time with Sir and my friends :)

I find it really rude that Doms will contact a submissive under consideration and say "hey if it doesn't work out with so and so, contact me."

Do you not have any respect for the rules of BDSM? Would you like another Dom contacting someone you had under consideration?

Respect is a two way street. You don't go after another man's girl regardless of how much you like her damn shoes.

I understand you have an attraction, but there are plenty of other subs who are not in a relationship for you to go after.

And btw, do you really think saying your shoes are sexy will get you anywhere???

ugh

So, I think I'm going to have to label myself as a masochist. I never thought I would be. In the beginning I was so afraid of the pain, however the more I play, the more my limits are pushed, the more I need and want the pain. It's so shocking to me that I feel this way. I hate and love the pain. Of course there are different kinds of pain and some are easier to take and when mixed with pleasure, are all the more wonderful.

I scened with my Sir at the Rochester Kink Society party this past Saturday. At one point He had the hitachi wedged against my clit and was spanking me. The mix of pain and pleasure was amazing.

Then there is His hurling stick. I hate that thing. Stingy, immense pain with very little effort and He decided to push my limits during the scene with that implement. I was [this] close to yellowing. After that He moved to the buggy whip. It's like a riding crop, but instead of a flat leather end, it has a string thingy (best way I can describe it). I have a strange love of it....sometimes. But when following the hurling stick, OMG it's like tiny stingers everywhere.

Mmmm then there are the floggers...Thuddy good pain. God I love those things. When the music is just right and the floggers are going I can get into a really good headspace where I smile through the pain.

Sometimes He builds the pain, starts slow, warms me up and I can take a lot. That's one of those scenes where you go to take pics the next day and you say "Holy Shit" when seeing the bruises, lol.

And sometimes He goes right to my edge where He pushes my limits with every blow. He wants my reactions, wants to hear me scream and curse and sometimes laugh through the pain.

Blindfolded I can hear Him laugh evily and hear the crowd laugh at what He's doing. Afterwards He clues me in to what he was doing. I love his joy, even at my own expense. It is what I am here for and why I strive to take the pain, why I do everything I can for Him.

It is also probably why I now feel I am a masochist. He made me this way, or rather in pleasing him and taking what he gives, I've become more than I was. That makes me smile :)

I love you Sir.

We celebrated one year together yesterday. The time has flown by but it has been a wonderful year. I am looking forward to all that this year brings...

Looking forward to the Rochester Kink Society New Year's Party. Spending time with my Sir and friends ringing in the new year.

I've been thinking about resolutions, kinky one's. I think for 2011 I will do my best to try new things, push my limits and focus my energy on making Sir's life happier.