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BrazenBitch
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Hello there! Good to see you. Oh, please, no need to kneel, unless you enjoy it. We're just getting to know one another, after all. Plenty of time for that later.
For the moment, you can call me Red. I'm a 34 year old man living in North Carolina, and I'm searching for not just a submissive, but a partner as well. I'm in no rush, though, and am willing to try things out, see if they work well.
I am single. I have no children. I am height-weight proportional, as you can see from my photos. I shave my head, and I have a lovely singing voice. I work quite a bit, but I cherish my personal time... I'd like to find one special person to share it with, though.
In joining CM, I hope to make friends, people I can talk with about this mutual journey of ours. So if something I say interests you, please feel free to send me a message. You never know where a simple contact can lead. We may end up friends... we may end up more. Finding out is the stuff life is made of! I will
happily talk to anyone, even if they don't have an interest in subbing
for me. Feel free to drop me a line anytime.
I believe that submission is an act of the mind and heart, not just the body. Where the mind goes, the body will quickly follow, after all. Therefore, I don't really go in for a lot of the "trappings" of the BDSM scene. Leather and chains are NOT my cup of tea.
So, what I'm looking for.
I would prefer to find a woman who likes me for who I am, for how I am. Someone who feels that she naturally wants to follow my directions, and also wants me to give her discipline and structure. I am looking for a woman who knows she has limits, but wants help finding them... and maybe discovering some wonderful green-lights along the way!
I'm into all sorts of things. However, I do draw a line at scat, watersports, and causing actual physical damage to myself or others. (Rosy-red bottoms don't count... I love those.) I love to role-play, and would like to find a woman with a great imagination to explore that realm with me as well.
My goal is to eventually find a woman who rejoices in my Mastering of her... who smiles every single time she catches the glint of my collar on her neck in the mirror. I want a woman who will fervently desire to take care of me, to follow my instruction, and submit to my will and discipline. This is a long-term goal, of course... in the meantime, I'll happily make a lot of new friends and acquaintances on this site, I'm sure!
Sound good so far? Okay, here's some specific things I'm looking for:
1. LOCAL. This means you live in North Carolina. Preferably in the Triangle.
2. HEIGHT-WEIGHT PROPORTIONATE. I don't care if your over 6 feet tall, or under 5 feet tall, as long as you have a balance. Booty is fine, in moderation, but rolls are not. You know what I'm talking about. My training regimen will involve a certain discipline in this area, but I need good material to start with.
3. NO 24/7 TO START WITH. I will work up to this if I feel we have the right chemistry. After all, would you get married to someone you just met? Or walk into a city street blindfolded? No, of course you wouldn't. A trial period is necessary in ALL relationships.
4. MENTALLY STABLE. If you cut yourself, talk to imaginary friends or wash your hands 200 times a day, we won't get along. I expect you to respect your mind and body.
5. COMMITMENT. This means that you are certain that this is a way of life you desire.
6. VANILLA ABILITY. This means you can and do have a viable vanilla life outside the D/s arena. I want to be able to let you meet my friends, and my family, if it works out. You need to know how to tone it down for the Vanilla world.
7. And most Importantly: TOTAL AND UTTER HONESTY. I don't want you to hold back, keep secrets, lie, fib, cheat or steal. This is freaking critical. I need to know, anytime I ask, that I will get the honest truth. Your safety and mine may depend on it, after all. This is especially important with regard to limits, and your expectations.
Still with me? GOOD. Here's how we get started. Send me a message, introduce yourself. If you have a profile picture, great. If not, please attach a picture which at least shows your face. I don't talk to boobies or crotches... I talk to people, and look them in the eyes.
If I like what I hear and see, I'll say so. If I don't think we'd click, I'll say so. Either way, I'll let you know. After all, it's only polite.
If I like what we have to say to each other, I'll suggest meeting in a public place. We'll see how it goes from there. I may or may not ask you for a second meeting. If not, look elsewhere. If I do, then you really got my attention.
Okay, I'll wrap this up. If you've come this far, why not start getting to know the Real Me? Message me, and let's get this thing started!
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Quick note: I finally got set up on FL, for those of you on there as well. Same username. Come by and visit! (^_-)
-Red.
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"There'll be blue skies falling, there'll be sad scenes, and bad dreams. In a world so uncertain, Through the clouds it's hard to see. I will grab you and carry you, calm your fears if you're afraid. We'll go walking across the fields of gray..."
A quick thanks to the nice folks at the G'boro munch. I had a lovely time. (^_^)
-Red.
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And now, part two. Thanks so much for all the kind comments, they're greatly appreciated. -Red.
Part 2
Saracen entered
his study to find the administrative work awaiting him. He disliked
it on a good day, and today he was less than happy to start with. His
little excursion to the medical ward had ended up with a disinfectant
swab and twelve stitches, along with an admonishment from his Doctor
about purposefully antagonizing women enough to receive jagged wounds
from them.
He sat down with a
thump in his high-backed leather desk chair, and thumbed
through the more mundane articles on his tablet first. Several
invitations, a request for help with a predator hunt on a neighboring
property, and several personnel issues with his farm out in the
country. Also a note from his friend in the Senate, once again asking
him to participate in politics.
Finally, he pulled
up the girl's file, and the attached medical report from Doctor
Deeja. The shoulder was, indeed, dislocated. He had put it to rights,
treated the attaching tendons with a healing-booster, and
administered a pain killer. He made note that she would likely also
have a vicious bruise in her mid-torso, just at the diaphragm.
Saracen frowned. He disliked breaking his possessions, let alone one
that could walk and talk.
He scanned through
the file. Deeja had administered the usual new slave workup. Shots,
blood work, full body scan. Her blood work was clean, and
exceptionally healthy for a new import. He noted that her right arm,
three fingers, four ribs and one cheekbone had all been broken at
some point in the past several years. She had two scars, one on her
right forearm, and another on the left side of her neck. The arm
injury had apparently been caused by flying debris, the neck... by a
very sharp instrument.
Doctor Deeja went
on to say that she seemed otherwise intact and in good health, but
had been quite difficult. The clinic had sedated her.
There was also a
personal note from the Doctor: “I went ahead and administered the
normal birth control routine, though she is just old enough to
start it. Don't be staying up all hours and overexerting yourself,
and wait at least a week for everything to kick in, you lucky bastard
you.”
Saracen sighed,
and put down the tablet. Well, at least this was expected. Virility
was a prized trait on Tharis, and the existence of female slaves, (as
well as discussion about who had the best examples) was a normal pass
time of those who were awarded the coveted slave license.
There was a knock
at the door.
“Enter,” he
replied, distractedly.
Kes came in,
closing the door behind her. She came over to his side, and knelt
down alongside his chair.
“I told you...
you don't have to do that,” he said, not looking at her.
“And I remind
you that this is how I was trained to behave, Sir.”
He glanced at her.
Her face was serene and passive.
“Does it please
you to do so?” he asked.
She looked up at
him, intently. “Very much so, My Lord. You need to remember that. A
slave finds joy in proper service. She finds happiness in serving her
Master in every possible way. She hopes not for herself, dreams not
for herself. She exists only to make her Master's life better. When
she succeeds, she feels complete. When she is complimented, she feels
ecstasy. She never expects, never hopes for recognition. Her service
is enough.”
“I freed you
over twenty years ago, Kes,” he reminded her, looking back to the
file.
“And I told you,
in that moment, that I refused. You may have put the paperwork
through, and you may have technically freed me, Sir. Yet, still I
serve. It's who I am. Please.... Do not forget that.”
He smiled a bit
then, remembering. “Very well. I take it you've seen her, then?”
“Yes,” Kes
answered. “She is still sedated. Doctor Deeja believes she has seen
some fighting and violence, but that she hasn't been beaten too
severely in recent time, at least within the last two years.”
“Her file says
she was captured as a combatant on Pheonix, when it was overtaken by
the Subarans,” he said, shaking his head. “Combatant... she was
what... fourteen? Fifteen?”
“Thirteen,”
Kes answered. “The Doctor says, according to his graphs for bone
growth, she is currently sixteen Earth-cycles old.”
Saracen's eyes
closed slowly. “No wonder the Doctor was so snide,” he remarked.
“The girl...
will clean up quite nicely,” Kes remarked. “You did not see her
at her best. She will be quite well-developed in a cycle or two.”
“Now I've got
you teasing me, too,” he said, lowering his forehead into his left
palm. He could almost feel Kes trying not to grin.
“You sure do
know how to pick them, Sir.”
“I order you to
allow me to maintain some of my dignity,” he said, flatly.
“As you command,
My Lord.”
“I think the
problem is going to be her mind. She got this far... so much so that
she was almost introduced to a nobleman of Tharis, yet she was still
able to secret away a weapon, defend herself. She called that proctor
a dog, if I remember correctly. I think she may be an
excellent actress, but training her into the slave that she actually
is?”
From the corner,
Thunder, one of Saracen's two wolfhounds, raised up his furry head
and yawned.
“Not you, boy.
Go back to sleep.”
The dog lay its
head on the floor over its paws and stared at his Master.
“Hell. Maybe I
should just train her like a dog,” he mused.
“Only to start.
Later, she'll need training in proper etiquette, cooking, cleaning,
laundry, and... well... other things as well. I daresay she'll not be
in the kennel long. However... that may be the most important part of
it all, now that you mention it,” Kes thought aloud.
Saracen picked up
the communicator on his right, and punched a button.
“Caius? Prepare
one of the kennel stalls with a straw, chain, collar, and a chamber
pot.”
“Yes Milord? We
treating the hounds like guests now, are we?” the old hand asked.
“We're training
a whole new animal starting tomorrow, Caius. With any luck, it will
be temporary lodging.'
“As you say,
Milord.” The communicator switched off.
“You may be onto
something,” Kes said, smiling.
“I'm going to be
depending on you for a lot with her, Kes. The basics, and then
everything she is going to need to know. You're better prepared than
I am, in a lot of ways.”
Her smile turned
warm and kind. “Thank you, Sir. However... the most important part
is yours. You are her Master now, for better or worse, and you will
have to set the tone immediately. You cannot afford to be so...”
she caught herself before she said 'soft' to his face.
“I know I'm a
bit of a strange bird, Kes. I always have been. When I freed you all
back then, more than one nobleman called me crazy. There were rumors
that someone in the senate was bucking for an inquest. But that
was... a long time ago. That girl needs to know how to survive here,
in the role into which she has been placed. I want to give her a
fighting chance at a life, Kes. A good life.” He look at her fully
now. Her head was bowed.
“It is a good
life, isn't it, Kes? Honestly?”
Her eyes rose to
his. There was a slight shimmer in them.
“It's been more
than I ever dreamed of, My Lord.”
They both smiled.
“Have her brought to the kennel. Keep her sedated until she's
locked up good and tight. I'm not taking my security for granted
again. Crazy little thing... she stared down the Reaper, and got in a
touch, too.” He smiled a bit wider as he turned back to the file.
“As you wish, My
Lord.” Kes swept up with effortless grace, and exited silently.
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And now, for something completely different. I sat down and wrote a bit last evening. Thought I'd put this out here, and see what you fine folks think.Enjoy!
Part 1
The two of them walked quietly through
the pens. The slaves inside were mostly sitting, some rocking, some
sleeping. No one looked up at them as they passed. Their footsteps
were quite loud on the stone floor. In the distance, they could hear
the white noise of the crowd outside, leaking in through barred
windows.
“I still think this is ill-advised,”
Saracen said.
“I know, Sir, but we've spoken about
this at length. It's time, and I think we both know it,” Kes
replied. “Begging your pardon, My Lord, but you are approaching the
age where it will be... unseemly if you don't choose one.”
He nodded below his hood, the crimson
fabric bobbing in the light of the torches. “You know... I swore. I
swore an oath. That usually means something. It certainly does to
me,” he stated. She smiled slightly. “You swore your
oath to me, My Lord. I have released you from it. For your own good,
and that of the household. Your honor is intact. And, begging your
pardon, Sir... It's not like you to complain, or to prevaricate. Lord
Saracen made a decision. Lord Saracen follows through on his
decisions. He always has, and always will,” she stated, a hint of
pride in her tone.
“Perhaps I'm simply getting old,”
he sighed.
“You're barely over sixty,” she
stated.
“I don't even know what I'm supposed
to look for,” he said.
“What would you look for in one of
your Marines?” she asked.
“Spirit. Character. Strength. A
notion of his own mortality.”
“I should think it's about the same
then,” she answered. “Only you'll also be looking for a pleasing
confirmation. It's a simple enough criteria to add to the list.”
He stopped suddenly, the opening in
his hood turning to look at her in the torchlight. She faced straight
ahead, unblinking, stopped silently at his side.
“You... you're enjoying this, aren't
you?” he asked, incredulously.
“My Lord's enjoyment is my
enjoyment,” she said, not cracking a smile. Her nostrils flared
slightly at the effort.
He looked back down the ranks of the
slave pens. “You're certain about the age range? We're not thinking
too... young, are we?”
She finally smiled. “You have to
include time for proper training. Also, remember, we live longer than
most off-worlders. Until she becomes acclimated, she will be aging
faster than we do. For about the first five years or so, she will age
at an average of...”
“Three times our native rate, I
know,” he said, taking over her train of thought. “I've read the
figures from the Ministry of Health and Immigration.”
Kes was silent. They began walking
once again, her light footsteps from sandal-shod feet, his heavy
steps from tough leather boots. They approached a doorway, where a
small, stooped man in a long tunic awaited them. He wiped his brow
with a handkerchief, which took a moment, given his expanse of brow.
He smiled in the artificial way of all salesmen, and ushered them
through the doorway to a small waiting area. Inside was a couch and
table, with wine and fruit laid out on a platter.
“Please, do sit, My Lord Saracen,”
the man said, coaxingly. “We're just rounding up the last of the
specimens to match the list of particulars you sent. Please, have
some wine, and I'll see to the arrangements.”
Lord Saracen scooped up a firm, round
pear from the tray, and remained standing. He looked the small man in
the eyes, his gray irises dilating in the shadow of his dark red
hood. The little man looked down to the table, and licked his lips.
Saracen brought the pear to his mouth, and slowly took a large, juicy
bite. He chewed for a moment, the sweet flavor of the pear filling
his mouth, and momentarily overpowering the scents of the slave pans
outside the door, and the small salesman's heavy cologne.
“Oh, it's quite alright, my good
man,” he said. “No need for a formal presentation. I'm a military
man. I'll look over the recruits in their ready state,” he
explained, walking towards the heavy wooden door in the opposite
wall. Kes followed him closely.
“But, Sir! They haven't been
properly instructed yet!” the man protested. “They have no idea
of the gravity of your name and position! It simply wouldn't do!”
He was scuttling around to try and interpose himself between his
customer and the door. “Please, just wait a bit, I'll have them
ready to meet you in a moment-”
“Move,” Saracen said, solidly. The
man stopped less than a centimeter away from the door latch, his hand
shaking.
“Yes. Yes, of course, how silly of
me. Please,” the man said, drawing his hand back, and stepping
aside.
Saracen unlatched the door with his
gloved hand, and stepped through into a larger room. This room was
much better lit, with natural light being piped into the room from
outdoors. This cast a more natural glow on the interior of the room,
and the twenty-odd people within its stone walls.
Jean-Philippe Saracen, Lord Saracen,
Hero of Tharis, Colonel of Marines, found himself facing a room full
of teenage girls. Each was dressed in the traditional short tunic
which slaves wore indoors, or outdoors in hot weather. They were
hurriedly being lined up and scrubbed cleaned by three proctors. As
he came fully though the doorway and stopped, there was a scream from
one of the girls near the end of the line where he stood. All the
girls looked in his direction, gasped, and dropped immediately to the
ground, heads down, arms outstretched, in a traditional pose of
supplication. Saracen recognized the pose; it was one of the first
taught to new slaves. Every slave he had ever owned had assumed this
position at least once. He hated it, and seeing it now almost made
him doubt his resolve.
“My Lord!” one of the proctors
said, bowing low, “Forgive us for not being prepared. Several of
the slaves are still arriving. If you would please wait just a
moment-”
“Have them stand,” Saracen
ordered.
The proctors looked at each other. One
shrugged her shoulders, and the second ordered the assembled girls to
“Stand, and keep your eyes in their place.”
Kes came to her Lord's side. “See,
you're getting into the spirit already,” she whispered.
“If I want your opinion, I'll ask
for it,” Saracen whispered back. “You evil old biddy.”
“I'm barely over one hundred,” she
reminded him, mock hurt in her voice.
“But 'evil' you don't contest,” he
observed.
“It's not my place to correct my
Lord,” she answered. Her grin fought its way to the surface, and
she nodded toward the group of young women standing at attention in
front of him. “Well, time to get started. Have fun.”
Lord Saracen sighed. He walked up to
the line of girls. Each was young, ranging from fifteen to seventeen
Earth-cycles in age. Each looked to be in good health. Each cast
their eyes downward, not daring to look into his.
“How do you keep them in such good
shape?” he idly asked the proctors.
“We make them run two kilometers
before each meal. If they don't finish, they don't eat,” the head
proctor replied. “Later, once they're all finishing the workout, we
turn it into a race. Only the top seventy percent get to eat. We also
start them on their exercise and diet programs the moment they enter
transit to Tharis. We've found that gives us the best results for
longevity, especially with the addition of our supplements, and the
higher gravity we run on our ships. We up the gravity gradually
during the trip.”
“How long do they usually take to
transit?” Saracen asked, walking down the line. Each face was
pleasing. Each girl, while differing in stature and coloring, matched
her sisters. There was something unnerving about them. He wondered
why he's never thought about such matters before.
“It depends on where they were
bought. We don't do the capturing ourselves. Some as far away as five
years, some as little as three.”
“And what happens if they don't eat
often enough? What happens to the unfit ones?”
There was a nervous silence. “We
have very little spillage,” one proctor replied, quietly. “Less
than three percent.”
Saracen stopped walking. His last
boot-clad footstep echoed in the stone interior. He looked straight
ahead. “I see,” he said. His voice was thoughtful, and quiet.
He looked back down the line. The
girls were all lovely. They would be, of course, having been
pre-screened for a client of his caliber. They represented a variety
of races and backgrounds. Each had long legs, pretty faces, delicious
curves, shiny hair. Each had survived being sold or captured. Each
had survived the rigors of the training program.
Each one was destined to be a slave
for someone like himself. Like himself...
The door opened, and three more girls
were ushered into the room. They immediately took up position at the
end of the reviewing line, and cast their eyes downward. They were
breathing heavily, and caught themselves, trying not to show that
they had been running. Saracen realized... that they just might go
hungry tonight.
The usher began closing the door, when
the sound of a terrified scream wafted down the hallway, and into the
room. The voice was a man's. The proctors all looked at each other,
and two of them dashed out of the room.
Lord Saracen followed, Kes on his
heels. The proctors gave chase, leaving a room full of bewildered
girls with only the salesman.
A voice, a young woman's, rose in the
hallway, from around the corner. “...what you get, you DOG! Keep
your hands off of me, or you'll lose more than that next time!” the
fierce scream came bouncing down the walls.
They rounded the corner, and were
greeted by the scene of a male proctor, bent over, holding his arm.
Blood spattered down on the floor, pooling near his right foot.
Beyond him was another proctor, approaching with a catch pole, loop
at the ready. Between the two slave dealers was something that looked
like a cross between a young girl and a wild animal. She held in her
hand a scrap of metal, sheared off of some fixture or other. Blood
dripped down from the ragged edge of the makeshift weapon. Her ragged
tunic was ripped from her shoulder, revealing her breasts; her legs
were bent, ready to spring, her arms taut, ready to slash.
“Move,” Saracen said calmly,
putting a hand on the injured man's shoulder. The man glanced up into
the face of his rescuer, and went instantly pale. He scrambled back
out of the way, landing in a crouch against the far wall of the
hallway.
Saracen caught the eyes of the other
approaching proctor, and stopped the man in his tracks by removing
his hood, and drawing one of his concealed fighting knives from
behind his belt He shifted it to his left hand.
“Report,” Lord Saracen said
sharply. His tone brooked no argument.
“We...we... were bringing her to the
chamber... f-f-for the review,” the injured man tried to explain.
“All... all I did was take a little squeeze-”
“I'd go have that arm looked at, if
I were you,” Kes said, interrupting him. The man looked up at her,
and shuffled back down the hall towards the other proctors. Kes
stared at her Lord intently, keenly aware of his body, his movements.
Saracen approached the girl slowly.
She was dark of skin, dark of hair. She had the look of someone
blessed by the sun, a wild girl from some faraway jungle, a predator,
cornered. Her dark eyes were wild. She would not cast them down now.
Fear and rage had taken her over. She held the scrap of metal out
from her body in one hand, swaying back and forth as she watched him,
a feral thing.
Lord Saracen had seen that look
before, in an enemy's eyes. Speaking was of little use, now. He made
his move so quickly, the girl should have had no time to react-
Her hand flashed, and the ragged blade
slashed up. Saracen's right hand came up to block, but not fast
enough. He stepped into her movement instead of away from it. He
corrected in mid-step, feeling the metal rip through the sleeve of
his tunic at the shoulder. He spun to his right, grabbed her wrist,
twisted down. He sent his elbow flying back into her mid-section,
felt the air leave her body in an instant. He pulled down, over his
shoulder, and she flew over him, landing on her back with a dull thud
on the stone. He twisted again, rolling her face-down. She drew
breath, screamed, and fell unconscious, her scream dwindling as she
slipped away.
“MY LORD!” the head salesman
exclaimed, rounding the corner. “I apologize most deeply. I shall
have her dispatched at once-”
“I'll take this one,” Saracen said
firmly.
“But...but...SIR!” the man said
“She just tried to kill-”
“Have her file ready in 5 minutes.
Transport her directly to Doctor Deeja at the Theranesia slave
clinic.” The salesman was now wringing his hands, and visibly
sweating. He was undoubtedly considering his liability.
“My Lord, you can't possibly-”
“I... can't... possibly....what?”
Lord Saracen asked, rising to his full two meter height. His voice
had gone from hot to cold. He turned to look the little man in the
eyes, his face alive with malice.
“I... I mean, that is...” the man
looked at the girl lying face-down on the floor, then back at his
client. His very wealthy, very angry, very tall
client.
“Of course, My
Lord. Right away, Sir,” the man said, pushing the proctors towards
the now-sleeping hellcat lying before them.
“Careful of her
left arm. Her shoulder is dislocated,” Saracen said, re-sheathing
his knife in its scabbard beneath his robe. Two people passed by with
a stretcher. The other proctors returned to the little room, and
ushered the remaining girls down a hallway, out of sight.
Kes' hand was on
his shoulder. It felt the wound there, and then took hold of his
elbow, gently guiding him back towards the entrance.
“That was...
rather rash, don't you think?” she asked quietly.
“Someone had to
stop her, or she'd have hurt someone-”
“I mean buying
her,” Kes explained. “No questions, no interview, no
measurements, no health-check... you haven't even looked over her
documents.”
“She's not
broken,” he answered.
Kes looked ahead.
She was no longer leading him. He grabbed another pear from the table
in the little room before walking out toward the pens, and their
waiting transport. His stride lengthened, his boot steps echoing on
the flagstones.
“She
should be broken,”
Kes said, firmly. “She's a slave, My Lord. You're doing her no
favor. She'll have to be broken eventually. But now, YOU will have to
do the breaking.”
“I'm well aware
of how to break someone, Kes,” he answered.
“Any one of the
others would have easily made you happy...”
“Lord Saracen
made a decision. Lord Saracen follows through on his decisions,” he
replied, ending their conversation. He lengthened his stride, making
Kes break hers to keep up.
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I've never let my Dominant nature get me into trouble...yet. Oh, sometimes it's difficult, believe me. I work in Customer Service presently, and the times I've had to count to ten and take a deep breath before speaking have been many. The times I've had to fight off the urge to physically smack someone have been few, thankfully, but they exist. My years on this planet have taught me a certain amount of patience, and given me a certain measure of mental and physical toughness, the better to weather the slings and arrows of rampaging morons.
I worry for our world, our culture, when I see human beings, with all their potential, worn down to prevaricating, indecisive, impolite, self-absorbed nitwits.
I look for honor, I look for manners, I look and hope for civility and intelligence, enlightened minds. The more I look, the more I have come to realize how rare and prescious those individuals are... because their idiotic ill-bred cretinous contemporaries seem to be the norm. I'm NOT talking about this site, incidentally... I'm talking about walking down the street, through the shopping mall, into and out of restaurants, and then finally back through my very own community.
Some days are worse than others, of course. Some days, I meet a wonderful person, a sense of humor, a knack for sarcasm, a jolt of red-hot wit, a serene moment of polite civility in an otherwise hostile world.
How I long to come home, and find my little one waiting. She meets me at the door, kneeling, head bowed, and welcomes me home. She takes my bag and coat, and puts them away. She has a drink and a snack prepared. She has dinner ready to be cooked upon my approval. She smells wonderful, having bathed before my arrival. She is clean and warm and smiling, ready to take away all the stress I've built up during the day. She relishes the role of being my catharsis, she loves that I drain away my pent-up energy and frustration upon her, for afterard, when I am calm and sated, I tell her how much it means to me. Her service, her devotion, her consideration, her manners, her sweet politensss, her lush warmth and lovely body remind me that I'm a better man, that the world can all go right to hell, and I will remain the same. I will always be me, and for her, that is everything.
Yeah. Days like today... That's all I want.
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This evening I went for a walk. I gleefully hit several of my favorite used book stores up and down Franklin St. A friend recommended I at least read the John Norman "Gor" books, and as I like fantasy fiction anyway, I figured I'd see if anyone had some old copies in their stock. Alas no luck there, but I'm sure some will turn up eventually.
I continued on up Franklin past some of my favorite shops... spent some time in Chapel Hill Comics... (hate that I missed Free Comic Book Day! GAH!) and continued on up towards Columbia.
I had the good fortune to fall into a spot walking behind a VERY lovely young woman, apparently of South Asian decent... every now and then I see a girl and my mind can't help but slip out of gear and appreciate the scenery. She was... well, what a healthy young woman OUGHT to look like, anyway. Not made up or over-dressed. She wore cropped pants and flip-flops, a tank top, her hair up in a pony tail revealing a delicious neck. Every curve in its place, every inch of exposed skin smooth and even... aaahhhh. The kind of art I'd go to a museum to see. (^_^)
I found a comfortable place to sit outside caribou coffee, and just watched people pass by. Spring is one of my favorite times of year, as people shed those warm layers in favor of shorts and t-shirts, and try to tan as quickly as they can to hide winter's paleness. Running shorts seem to be THE thing to wear for young women in Chapel Hill, and I can't say I mind whatsoever. I whistled "Dream a Little Dream" as I sat and watched. One young lady caught my eye, and smiled automatically, which I just LOVE. She caught herself, tried *not* to smile, which didn't work, and hurried on past me. Sweet little thing, she made my night.
I caught the bus home just in time to avoid the evening rain, though I walked the block from the stop to my place in the sprinkles, letting the little droplets of water refresh me, kicking off the dust and worries of the day. I finally felt... relaxed. Also accomplished, even though I did basically nothing I had set out to do.
I think I've mastered being comfortably alone. NOW, to master "comfortably together", I just need to find the right little subbie. Any takers? (Heh heh heh...)
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I wonder sometimes just how submissive a personality I should be seeking. Should she only want to be Dominated in the bedroom, or should she want to please me in every facet of my life? Should my desires and needs always come first, therefore fulfilling her longing to serve? Or should her pleasure come with the same importance as my own? What should bring her pleasure? The same sort of stimulation I enjoy, or a more sinister and complicated mixture of pain, pleasure, punishment, reward and inspiration to service? Do I want an equal partner, a slave, a maid, a housekeeper I can have my way with? There are so many permutations of submission... it boggles the mind when one considers the possibilities. I think the answers will come from within, not without... and yet, the idea of the journey, the exploration excites me immensely.
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There are times, there are times.... when being in this position is somewhat lonely. I'm not the type to whine about it, I'm just saying. A Dominant, be they male or female, is a strange creature. We are the givers of discipline, the punishers, the leaders, the movers, the shakers, the ones who decide and the ones who guide. But, at the same time, we all very much want to be loved, admired, appreciated, adored by someone. Not just anyone, mind you... we know ourselves well enough that only a special kind of person will do. But in all the focus of D/s, we Doms are limiting ourselves, too. Could I be happy in a totally vanilla life? No. I don't think I could. Being the leader, being in charge of myself and my special one is something... innate about me, it's just who I am. So I continue to search for someone who is *just the right fit* for me... not perfect, but right for ME, who I am inside. Not just anyone will do... and as such, the search is harder, it seems, than it might otherwise be.
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I hate pollen. I hate it so fucking much. And can someone please make a soft tissue that doesn't disintegrate during use? Thank you in advance. What does this have to do with bdsm? Not a damn thing. However, it is difficult to properly spank and sneeze at the same time. Trust me on this.
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I have a strange quirk, for a Dom: I like being teased. It's true! I like it when a woman hints at what I could have, then denies me... subtly insinuates that her charms would drive me wild, and then sets out to make me work for them. Smouldering glances, feather-light touches, soft words in my ear, all promising, yet not quite delivering. However, there is a bit of a twist, a *kink* if you will, in the scenario. Right in the middle of teasing me, just when she thinks she might have the upper hand, I smile my evil half-grin, grab her, yank her around, and proceed to show her *just exactly whom is in charge around here.* Ideally... this would be exactly what she was hoping for, too. At the end, as she pants and heaves from the exertion, there should be a "thank you, Sir" in there as well, testament to the certain fact that her teasing was all an act; She knows it, and I know it, and we both know that she's mine, anytime, anywhere, in any way I want.
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I hear a strange mixture from people who know me... some of them are very surprised to learn I'm into D/s, especially that I identify as a Dom. They see me as soooo laid back and cheerful. Others (especially a few former subs) have told me that my every movement and smile screamed my Dom side, even without intending it. It seems quite odd to me that I would be viewed in two such polar opposite extremes by a variety of people, all of whom are sane, intelligent individuals. I think a lot of the disparity has to do with symbolism. Society has put forth that Dom men are aggressive, sadistic, mean, even violent. It's a standard media image, to be sure, and yet... I think that symbolism totally and utterly misses the truth. Here I am, an extremely affable person.. and I just love being in control. I know when it's appropriate, and when it's not... and as such, I function very, very well with most people. In general, I'm a very gentle person... to the point where I rarely touch people, in fact. However, when I feel comfortable doing so, free to pursue my own desires with a willing partner... I unleash my Dominance, and feel so...FREE. So completely natural and right! I live within my limits, my partner's limits, and no one else's. Like I say... it's a strange double-existence, and I suspect a lot of Doms have experienced the same feeling. I don't own a single piece of black leather clothing... and yet... I feel, quite unashamedly, that being in control of my partner is simply... the way things ought to be. I guess, unless you know what you're looking for, though... you'd never know it by looking at me. (^_^)
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Hello, all! Been a few months since I've been on CM. I am always a bit saddened when I sort through the profiles in my normal search on here, looking for people to talk with. It seems like every time I open a profile of a woman who seems interesting, attractive and articulate, her journal ends up full of sad lamentations about e-mail boxes full of messages from... well, assholes. Have we male Doms on CM really degenerated so far? Or is it more a question of a bunch of horny idiots getting on CM looking for a quickie with a girl they can spank and treat like crap? Intuition says it's the latter, but I'm not fully sure about that. It seems that the whole BDSM culture has veered away from some basic truths: 1. D/s isn't about sex. (Okay... wait...um... it's not *completely* about sex.) It's about the *relationship* between you and your partner. 2. BDSM is NOT a catch-all. Not every person here is going to be into the same kinks... life would be pretty boring if that were the case, wouldn't it? 3. Not every sub wants to be abused, either physically or verbally. Think about it. Some will, of course, but treating every sub alike is a bit insulting. 4. People are individuals, and thus are immediately deserving of a modicum of respect and politeness. (Until and unless they prove otherwise.) 5. People who have BDSM-related interests are NOT more likely to have sex with strangers. We simply like different things when we DO decide to do so. 6. Trust and submission are EARNED. They are not, nor should they be, immediate. Calling yourself "Master" doesn't make you one. When your partner can't help but call you "Sir" or "Madam" or "Master" or "Mistress", simply because they *innately desire* to do so... THAT is when you deserve the title.
I think that covers a lot of the major points that have been buzzing in my head this evening. Male Doms: Treat people like people, and maybe, MAYBE you'll find what you're looking for. Just like the real world. Funny how that works, isn't it?
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I think there may be a limit as to how much porn can be produced. Seriously. At some point.... every possible form of kink will have been seen. I think we may have to wait until we meet aliens to make new, original stuff.
Either that, or things like 'being fully dressed' and 'saying please and thank you' will become the new kink.
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Today was better. People basically behaved themselves. (Except for this one persistent east-indian gentleman who kept trying to return a washed-and-worn pair of year-old pants which had been eaten by moths.)
I bought a new moleskin blazer, dark chocolate brown, on a tremendously good sale at the Gap.
This evening, a lady friend of mine (whom I have not been involved with) smiled at me with this overpowering honest cute-as-a-bunny smile. Kinda melted me a little.
Overall, not a bad day. I now have cocoa, and tiny chocolate donuts. MMmmmm...
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I love cocoa. Who else loves cocoa?^_^ |
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Am I the only one who still thinks that politeness is necessary in our daily lives? I mean, seriously, people... I have a 2nd job in retail, and you'd think it qualified me as a member of some under-caste. People were, literally, SCREAMING at us in my store today... all because they couldn't get an additional 40% off some already-marked-down prices. Are we really so far gone as to abandon all sense of propriety and decorum because we're disappointed that some piece of year-old clothing isn't as cheap as we want i to be?
I guarantee you... if I had acted that way in my parents' presence, I'd have been smacked in the head.
My advice: Have a little personal dignity and self-respect. Be polite. In the end, I'll do a hell of a lot for a polite person, but I'll do jack squat for a rude, whiny bitch.
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Sometimes I just love dressing up. I'm wearing a shirt, tie, dress pants, dress shoes, vest, coat and hat today.
Sometimes a Gentleman just likes to feel handsome. *tips hat and grins*
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Wow... well, here I am on CM, looking to meet new people and have great experiences! Let's hope that's how it turns out anyway. (^_-)
I'd love to talk with anyone. Feel free to drop me a line. No need for honorifics. JUst say hello! If you're curious about something, ask away.
That being said... what is the first hard-limit you ever encountered? What was that experience like? Also, what's the first "OMG, please more of that!" moment? Discuss!!!
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Age: 20 |
Washington |
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