In my case, BBW stands for Beautiful, Brilliant, Wise-ass. You are fore-warned.

I am very real. I will never ask you for money. I am not a bored housewife who recently read 50 Shades. I am actually available for the type of relationship I describe here. (I am not interested in an online or long-distance relationship.) 

What I bring to the table: intelligence, humor, curves, excellent taste, an artistic aesthetic, long red hair, talent (in more ways than one), enthusiasm, a certain kind of innocence, optimism, a need to be flogged and spanked, a wicked lingerie collection, a potty mouth, self-sufficiency, a love of gentlemen's clubs and Hip Hop music. 

If I could order up my dream, you would be tall, dark, and handsome. Physically strong. You would make me feel small--a doll you could break into pieces--and yet feel utterly protected at the same time. 

You would be an absolute gentleman who dresses well and has lots of weekend time to spend on me. You'd be smart and fun to be with--you would make me laugh. Your style of dominance is warm yet firm. You are sure of yourself and of our relationship and are therefore not threatened when I flirt or show off or spend playtime with another. You are proud to be with me and happy to do vanilla things with me, outside of the bedroom. Inside of the bedroom, you are imaginative, forceful, well-equipped (in more ways than one), and kinky as shit. 

You might already be with--or look forward to finding--a girl: maybe younger, shorter, curvy. She would be sub to us both, and know her place.

Please note if you violate any of the Ten Commandments listed below, you are likely to get the response you deserve.

The Ten Commandments of CollarMe and similar sites

– Abaddon on another site

So this guy read my previous journal entry, self-identified as a fuckwad troll, and decided he had to tell me how butthurt he was. LOL! Seriously, though, what kind of person is THIS hostile to a complete stranger? 

I don't know this guy--never spoke to him before. His first message to me is

You live for libertarian politics yet you let yourself be so thoroughly controlled? And you call others fuckwads? What a phony sham you are ... fuckwad. 

What??? You're on a BDSM site and you have a problem with Master/slave? That makes no sense! Plus, I love to talk politics--but not with assholes! My reply was what a big man you are! calling a girl names on the internet--does it make your tiny dick hard? 

LOL! I was pretty proud of my response! ;-)  His next attempt at shaming me was A typically brainless answer from a typical brainless person who wouldn't know a libertarian if she tripped over one. You're too stupid to debate my assertion about your phony politics, so you turn to your 5th grade memories to reply ... assuming you even made it to 5th grade. Ignorance truly is bliss. 

You know, spelling is correct. Sentence structure is competent. Into politics. Could have been someone I would have really enjoyed conversing with. Too bad he's such a douche! I tried being reasonable this time--if he backed down and apologized, I thought I might be willing to talk to him. I simply replied in kind. I didn't offer any debate because you offered none. I would have gladly explained how the two are not contradictory if you had engaged in conversation rather than ad hominem attacks. 

Sadly, no. My faith in humanity is once again crushed. His third attempt at I Know You Are, But What Am I was Ad hominem? Wow, turning to Latin term to show how smart you are? How transparent. How pathetically lame. You accused me of calling you a name, but were too dim to see I was simply throwing your own name-calling back at you ... so you went right to your little bag of tricks and played the small-dick card. You should have done that in Latin! You aren't intellectually gifted enough to debate the average armadillo, let alone anyone who sees through your phoniness. I'm waiting to see what Latin term you'll use next to show how "smart" you are. 

Wow--really? I totes didn't notice you called me a fuckwad when I had called others fuckwad. How clever of you! (rolls eyes) And, sorry to disrupt your little fantasy, but I actually really talk like that. Anyway, by this time, his hostility was becoming tiresome and I had much more enjoyable people to converse with, so my last response was what's Latin for " Fuck off, you're not worth my time?"

Aannd blocked!

I guess I have now been on CM long enough for the trolls to find me.

Listen, fuckwads, you're wasting your time. I'm going to block you without a second thought--and without a response. You'll get nothing from me.

So, move along.

This was my profile text, but since I am not looking right now, I have removed it. I kinda like it though, so I am moving it here.

Things you need to know about me:
1. I'm always open to new friends, but I'm really only looking for an in person, real life, local D/s relationship(s). Not at all interested in cybering, phone sex, etc.

2. I have never actually been with another girl or a couple, but it's something i would really like to try.

3. I need lots of attention, affection, and approval. I also need to know exactly what is expected of me.

I know there is obviously a period of exploration where you ask each other questions and explore each others desires and limits. But once my partner knows I dont do kids, animals, piss, shit, or blood then it's time for him to take over. I don't want anymore questions. It's time for him to grab a fistful of my hair and whisper in my ear all the dirty, depraved things he's going to do to me. It's time for him to say, "Get over here and give Daddy a blow job." And then to coach me through it if I don't do it to his liking.

Please note that I am submissive sexually only. I will not be your slave or maid, etc.

4. What I look for in a man: I love a tall man. A manly man. Dominance. Intelligence. Someone who pays attention, who I can respect, a good communicator. A Gentleman Sadist (I'm not a painslut, but I NEED to be spanked and flogged.) Healthy. Likes to laugh. Gets my sarcastic/ironic sense of humor. Someone who will push me. Non-smokers and non-believers are encouraged to apply!

5. If you are looking for marriage, children, 24/7 submission, 1950's household, exclusivity, etc., then I am NOT your girl.

Recently, I initiated a divorce. (It should be final in March.) After 27 straight years of motherhood and 14 years of marriage, I had gotten to the point where I couldn't be that person anymore.

So, I am trying to rediscover what makes me tick. What things I really truly love and want out of life. That's what this list is about. It's to remind me to focus on me and the life I want to have. It's intensely personal, but I thought I would include it here as it tells quite a bit about me.

These are not necessarily set in stone, but they are my aspirations for now.

1. I want to travel
2. and write
3. and meet interesting people
4. and never HAVE to cook again.
5. I want to have friends
6. and parties
7. and pretty, not practical, clothes.
8. I want to live alone
9. and have only things I love in my apartment.
10. I want to challenge myself.
11. I want to go back to school.
    
12. I want to walk to work.
13. I want to work at or near a university.
14. I want to go to museums
15. and look at art
16. and listen to music
17. and spend hours in bookstores
18. and attend plays
19. and there’s probably lots of things I don’t even know about that I want.
20. I want to be able to spend money on myself without feeling guilty.
21. I want to be able to see a doctor without being "teased" about being damaged goods or being reminded that I cost him half his retirement.
22. I want someone to tell me I’m pretty
23. and make me feel sexy.
24. And tell me I can, too, do it.