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I'm a dark thrill seeker~a paradox of altruism & existential instinct. I was a foster kid & do terribly w/ families. I'm a published authoress, a bioethics researcher and former Relief Aid coordinator working w/ trauma survivors in the Middle East & Kosova. I'm a Jungian, an indignant lover of the shy and submissive. I'm half Native American and I speak my own Native language, as well as Inuktitut, Kalaallisut, Arabic, Hebrew, French & Spanish. I tredded the academic swamp of UC Berkeley for graduate school and find the silent cellar of fear just an invisible barrier being alive and what it means to live.
I like the cerebral passions of a timid seeker of what we cannot see. I find opportunity in the shock of one's own ability and can't stand those who apathetically walk through life.
I don't eat much, leave the house when I need to, have few friends near me (but maintain close intimacies with many incredible people in the places I've previously lived ~ NYC, New Orleans, Vancouver, Iqaluit, London, Edinburgh, Belfast, Paris, Palermo, Prishtina, Spanish Morocco, Beirut, Amman, Jenin, Ramallah, Akko, Tel Aviv, Brisbane, Auckland, and Jakarta.) I am the polar opposite of your average girl next door: dominant~turned on by extremes~very maternal yet in need of that missing puzzle piece to comprehend the full modality that forces the ongoing descent and ignorance of that which would otherwise bring revolution and meaning.
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I am trauma counselor and have worked in the Middle East, Africa, and Oceania. I am extremely maternal by nature and have been through the loss of both my fiance, as well as, others very close to me. I am no stranger to hardship and trauma. However, I find the healing nature which seems to inevitably develop between Domme and sub, to be very positive and healthy when created between two people who naturally complement one another.
Nurturing tenderness, however, I am also strict, assertive, and focus. I will discipline you, push your limits, and mold you into the submissive that you should be. However, I will also nurse you, hold you, protect you, and make you a part of my family.
Connecting with anyone who's so shallow as to take on the significance of these interactions lightly will find very little in any connection to me. I understand those with other responsibilities, schedules, and a need for discretion. However, I am not looking for NSA and I am not looking for anyone more interested in submitting to their own fantasies, then to their dominant.
I am not looking for LTR, or any commitments, other than honesty and a willingness to explore the boundaries of D/s.
I'm looking for a sweet, submissive, preferably open minded and aware of his or her needs as a submissive. I'm looking for someone who needs punishment and discipline as much as he/she needs nurturing and safety. I'm looking for someone willing to go the length of the exploration with me and not someone who will run when things get difficult or serious. I'm not looking for commitments, just honesty. Be willing to make leaps of faith with your anxiety and be open to your limits. Ideally, I'm looking for someone who will allow their fate to rest devotedly in my hands, while I take them to places they didn't realize existed.
Like my profile implies, I'm a gentle yet firm Mistress who can, and will, transition you from your conventional BDSM lifestyle into one that includes an equally physical and erotic aspect yet also transcends that to explore suffering, affection, and care. I want to intersect in the center where intense dominance and eroticism develops a sanctuary of intuition and tenderness - where I care for my sub and his needs and he learns from that care, takes comfort in my safety and appreciates the family and refuge that both my discipline and kindness provide.
For many years I was a professional Dominatrix, however, after I completed graduated school, I began working in Social Rehab - mainly caring for torture survivors in many different parts of the world. Through genuine D/s relationships (ones that hold honesty, devotion, faith, and endurance both psychological and physical,) confidence, dependence, trust, family, and safety, can all come together under the umbrella of pleasure.
For me, I have witnessed extreme pain and the consequences of unspeakable horror, however, I have also shared in the bonds of trust and recovery in a way most people never see. It is a pathway filled with tumultuous suffering yet, in those moments when genuine rehabilitation begins, it also becomes the doorway to a compelling and life-long friendship. That, in my opinion, is the most powerful thing on earth.
This is the reason I leave aesthetics and those facets of physical interaction to later - I find just such endearment to be very much dependent on the innerworkings of my submissive as someone who hurts from within, and, as someone who could possibly be in my care, may look to me for not just nurturing and safety, but also someone with whom I may be able to find a similar position and orientation with, coming from the the other side.
Complete surrender is a measure thus its foundation must be very solid, very real, and involve so more than can be realized through mere physics.
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