I think this, assuming anyone who messages me actually reads it, will save me from typing the same answers over and over again. FAQ is go!

What are you looking for?

The idea of actively looking for anything specific seems counter intuitive to me. I'm just sitting over here, waiting for connections with personalities that may or may not be human. This also answers the similar "Why are you looking for submissives, dominants, and switches of all persuasions?" 

Favorite video games?

Fallout, Far Cry, Elder Scrolls, Bioshock, I Am Alive, and pretty much anything that isn't Call of Duty or Halo.

How'd you get into "the lifestyle"? I didn't. I also think "the lifestyle" sounds really really dumb. However, I learned about bdsm through seedy yahoo chat rooms when I was a teenager. The attraction sort of grew exponentially from there. 

Boobs?

Yes, please?

Can you meet me in _____?

No. I mean, I'm sure I could...but I'm not going to. :P

What do you do for a living?

I really hate this question, because its irrelevant. It's not what I'll be doing in ten years.

Will you sell me your _____?

No. I'm pretty attached to all my things. The things that I don't want anymore get donated, and the things that are too torn up to donate are recycled.

Why didn't you respond to my form letter?

The same reason you sent a form letter instead of a big kid message. 

What sort of things are you into?

Kittens, video games, kitten video games...kittens that play video games?

Wanna have sex with my dog?

No. No. No. No. No. No. No^∞

There. I think that's enough for now. :D

I want to post a journal, but I have no idea what to write about. Stream of consciousness? Stream of consciousness. It's really.really.fucking.ridiculously.fucking.cold outside. Really.(did I use that word already?) I can't feel my toes or my nose. I'm not even outside. Now that I look at my feet, I've finally noticed that my socks don't match. Matching socks is overrated anyway. Who decided you needed matching socks? They all get mixed up in the wash. Pairing them seems pointless. I wonder how much money those companies that make wearable fairy wings (you know, colored pantyhose stretched around a couple of wire frames) make annually. Who decides they want to go into the shitty fairy wing business? I kind of want to meet those people. I imagine they're either depressingly desperate or incredibly interesting. I've been reading the dark tower series. It's beautiful. I started reading them a few years ago, but then life started happening. Life is still happening, but I make time. I should make time for more important things. Are there more important things than reading? Excluding necessary biological functions. Did you know that I'm borderline obsessed with the plural forms of words. Roofs? Rooves? Oh. Autocorrect thinks its roofs. What's the plural of platypus? Platypuses? Platypi? Platypodes? Platitudes? No. That last one isn't right. Wikipedia says its a hotly debated subject. I may have tossed in the word 'hotly' on my own just because I think its funny to imagine scientists hotly debating platypusesodesiz. I wonder how I should end this. Do I just stop? I'm sure it doesn't matter, it'll end up being a tl;dr situation. Ive decided to add more due to the fact that my boredom was only slightly relieved. The bad news is that now Im typng it in a little text box that is far less forgiving. For example, if i try to type a smiley face it will come out :b) because this particular text box is evil. i wish the mobile version of this site had an 'edit journal' feature. i should really lesrn how to code. ive always wanted to learn how to code. i think thats something ill do once this semester is over. oh man. this semester is almost over. i have to start working on final essays. What does it mean to be an educated person? Absolutely nothing. Educated is a subjective term. My client is in her bedroom making these adorable high pitched squealing sounds. Theyre happy sounds, dont worry. They just also happen to be adorable. And she also happens to be making those noises in her sleep, which multiplies the adorableness. i should go to sleep. legality be damned.

Who wants to have a conversation about communism and capitalism? :)

(An intelligent conversation)

Exciting stuff, I know. Form an orderly line.

You know. I feel pretty lucky. Browsing the journal section, there are a lot of obviously unhappy people. A lot of cynical, cold, jaded, and sad people. I'm very grateful. I'm the happiest I've been in a long time. I had almost forgotten what feeling good felt like while I was wasting away in Texas (and the months following that entire fiasco). I've got great people in my life that continue to surprise me. I'm kicking ass in school (Deans list. What up.). I've got a new kitten that my cat actually approves of. I've got a job that pays me enough and tries to work with my school schedule. I'm capable of building an asymmetric piece of furniture. I'm a living, breathing, awesome creature with endless potential. And I'm present enough to realize all of this.

Due to the unreliability of the audio journal function, today's message is brought to you by the power of text.

It's been a bit since I've updated everyone (I know, you're all out there losing your minds) on what's been going on over in Recalcitrantt-land.

I'll tell you what's been going on.

An explosion of furry cute-ness.

          Hello. That's me.

I happened to find four stray kittens last week, and they (along with my awesome boyfran, college classes, and work) have eaten my life.

They aren't really all that time consuming, I just can't think of anything I'd rather do than play with kittens. Maybe have sex. But I don't know.That's a close one.

At any rate, I'd like to apologize to those who have been trying to communicate with me. I've been preoccupied. You'll get over it.

I'll probably save the discussion about the Xbox One and the upcoming Deadpool game for another time. A time when I don't need to take the quickest shower of my life and run out the door.

<3

So quit being so emo all the time, internet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdUUx5FdySs

As promised.

Right in the feels.

I really wanted to record a journal when I got home last night (this morning) but my internet was down. Stupid internet. Preventing nerd rants. Since I probably won't have time to record one tonight, I'll just tap one out on my phone.

Alright! Let's talk about the new Iron Man movie. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you close your eyes and keep scrolling. There are bound to be spoilers. First and foremost, I really enjoyed the movie as a whole. They do right by Iron Man the majority of the time, and the Extremis storyline is solid enough to handle some creative tweaking. However. How.ever. My main issue was with the portrayal of the Mandarin. Is the classic portrayal of Mandarin a little racist? Sure. Is the Mandarin really some little scientist whos only power seems to be that he has injected himself with extremis? Nononono. I don't care how many dragon tattoos you put on him or how loudly he may proclaim that he is, in fact, the Mandarin. I understand character evolution. I do. Make the Mandarin a robot, or a dead warlord, or maybe even an entire organization. Don't dangle some guy with rings and homicidal tendencies in my face, and then rip him away with only a "jkjklolol".

I don't know. I mentioned last night that I may be nitpicking here. But I really like the Mandarin as a villain. Technology can be scary. Alien technology harnessed by a crazy smart bad guy can be terrifying. The fact that they seemed to invalidate the initial portrayal of the Mandarin bugs me. He's cool! A little campy, but cool!

Also. A little bummed there weren't any disgusting cocoons, but I can live with that.

Anyway. So. Other than that one minor (to some people) detail, the movie was great. And the rest of the evening was great too. Even if it included a police officer and obnoxious mechanical noises. :)

Time for a math test.

Dom out.

Dueces, bish.

http://youtu.be/xXAoG8vAyzI

Less than four minutes to get a better understanding of human sexuality.

I've been an unapologetic cunt lately.

I highly recommend it.

Sometimes it's better than the block button.

Just because I dont feel like going back and deleting previous entries.

And because everyone and their mother is confused.

I'm single as a motherfucker.

Do I have journals about my ex?

yes. yes I do.

Key word there is "ex".

So.

Stop sending me messages about it.

Dr. Horrible.

It's free.

And on youtube.

You have no excuse not to watch it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVBjS22ppdw

Just sayin'.

I figured I'd actually type out a journal for the first time in a long time.

Reasons?

I find it's easier for me to organize my thoughts in a written format.

Also, I feel like it reaches a broader audience than audios, since most people sort of skim through them, and that's a bit more difficult to do with an audio or video journal. (which i recorded, but this one will hopefully be easier to follow.)

Okay.

So.

Topic.

Bdsm and D/s relationships in the public eye.

This is a response to journal I read earlier in the day, and the conversation that followed.

A submissive male posted a journal about bdsm and how he feels it should be more publicly accepted and whatnot.

His points:

-Respect, trust, and open-mindedness are a major part of D/s relationships, and the public should see that.

-There are certain fetishes he deems too extreme within the community to make bdsm a publicly accepted lifestyle/community/sexual...thing...>_> (his examples were financial dommes, blackmail, and toilet play)

(I'd just like to add, it was a pleasure to have a discussion with him about this. It's rare to find someone who is willing to discuss their beliefs with you, and not get offended when you disagree.)

However.

Here's my problem.

Sure, the bdsm community is getting more attention as of late (thanks, Fifty Shades of whatever the fuck I havent read yet) and I consider this a good thing. People are going to look into the scene a bit more, and not everything is going to appeal to them. There are always going to be fetishes that arent for you.

Just because you dont want to be a puppy-boy/girl, human toilet, pay pig, or a TPE slave...doesn't mean there arent others that very much want those dynamics. 

So, I feel it's unfair to the entire "community" to even want to try to shine a light on the more socially acceptable aspects of D/s relationships and ignore the more hardcore parts that exist is some relationships.

If I want my Dom to beat me until I'm bruised and bloody, and we're both consenting adults, isn't that my right? Should I be shunned from the bdsm community because my relationship is too extreme for the public palate? Because we want to be seen as a step up from vanilla relationships by the rest of society?

I completely understand the need to feel accepted.

But as my friend Hazel said, half truths are still half truths.

We can pretend that the bdsm community is all about respect, trust, service, protocol, and devotion. (which it should be, don't get me wrong.) But we cant ignore that there are darker, dirtier sides to a lot of these dynamics.

What do you think?

Shun the "extremists" (which still. is a matter of opinion that will vary from person to person.) to a deeper part of the internet and play nice in the public eye?

"no no, no pissing in mouths here. This is bdsm. Nobody does anything like that here."

Or accept that not everyone is into the same things you are, live and let live, and carry on?

http://youtu.be/m3-4Ez7Kc-o?hd=1

Day three of adventures in Providenciales.

Woke up to the sound of waves and the smell of coffee (with a bit of rum, of course. This is vacation.)

Dragging the kid brother with me to snorkel the reef outside in a few minutes.

Hopefully we'll see the resident dolphin again today. (:

I might not come home.

Ever.

http://www.collarme.com/personals/v/1323511/details.htm

Dee. Is that you?

:o

[day officially made. Thanks collarme. xD)

I have this ridiculously strong urge to write this morning.

About life, love, electronic cigarettes, graphics cards, lyricism, and and hipsters.

Now, while it'd probably be easy enough to write about these things here for everyone to see, I don't know if the internet is ready for that kind of philosophizing.

Maybe I should find an etch-a-sketch.

"To be quite frank, the more I think about it, I don't think it'd matter if you had aids or some flesh eating bacteria or were a zombie and going to kill me in the end.
I'd be going out in your arms."

Cheese gets me good.

<3