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Rebelyna

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Hello I'm new here, a bbw. I've never lived the life but I'm curious. I identify as a sensualist because I'm curious and wanting to figure out what I like when it comes to bdsm. I know what I like when it comes to sex. But I'm unsure when it comes to bdsm. I hope to find a dominant man who can help me learn. But when I say dominant, I mean only in the bedroom for sex because that's the only way I want to be submissive. I know, based on a bad experience, that I don't like or want anything having to do with pain. Surest way to turn me off! I love teasing. And I'm curious about some other things like bondage, Ben Wa Balls, anal beads, and other toys. I prefer private one on one interactions. I have squirted before although this does not happen easily as I find it embarrassing and tend to mentally block myself. I have somewhat of a hangup about squirting and the whole wetness (flooding) thing. I would need a Dom who could understand this and be able to deal with it and, hopefully, be into it. Is that a fetish :) Seriously though, they sell products to help relieve vaginal dryness and of course there are all types of lubricants for sex. I will never have to spend a penny on those! == Results from bdsmtest.org == 94% Submissive 93% Rope bunny 63% Brat 45% Vanilla 43% Experimentalist 32% Primal (Prey) 29% Masochist 22% Girl/Boy 21% Slave 10% Pet 10% Switch 9% Degradee 6% Non-monogamist 5% Dominant 5% Rigger 4% Ageplayer 3% Master/Mistress 3% Voyeur 3% Exhibitionist 2% Brat tamer 2% Primal (Hunter) 1% Owner 1% Sadist 1% Degrader 1% Daddy/Mommy

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11/11/2017 11:35:11 PM
I sit back and I watch people. I see more than most realize. Little things. Looks, glances, tone of voice. I notice it all. My mind never stops. Keeps me awake. Analyzing the nuances of the day. How loud silence can be. So many questions.

10/26/2017 11:59:05 AM
So many who want just casual sex. No one wants a connection, a life, love. I seem to have lost my ability to squirt. I need the connection to do it. You can't connect casually. Maybe I'll just walk away for awhile again. Too much stress right now. So much going on.

10/16/2017 7:41:56 AM
I wonder if anyone is looking for relationships anymore or is it only casual sex they want. I don't think the connection needed for BDSM can be established casually. So what does that leave. Also since I don't care for pain where do I fit? Guess I'm feeling a little lost today.

10/14/2017 12:41:06 AM
I'm discovering more and more that I'm attracted to primal men. Not sure where that will lead but I hope to explore it. I think I've always been this way just wasted so much time trying to be what others expected instead of who I truly was.

4/1/2017 8:22:20 AM
I hear from a lot of Doms "It's not about you, it's about me" I don't think so. Now don't get me wrong I don't think it's all about me. I do think it's about pleasing each other. Maybe I'm wording it wrong because I don't seem to get my point across. So I'll try this explanation. I enjoy pleasing my Dom but if I don't feel he cares about me and what pleases me too then I'm unhappy. To me it's about growing together and pleasing each other. And that's what I want.

4/1/2017 8:17:17 AM
Since the journal is about getting to know me (lol) I'll talk about me a little. I'm a Scorpio and while I'm sexually submissive in life I have always been in charge, didn't really have a choice but to be. I'm strong willed and stubborn. I'm old fashioned I believe in manners and treating others with respect. I also don't tolerate disrespect. I'm not good with crowds and lots of noise. I couldn't tell you why but I get anxiety attacks. That's not to say I can't go to things that are crowded and noisy I just need to be able to go to the edge or get away from people if I need to. I hate strangers touching me and I get overly anxious. I love to read. I also love animals and I have pets. I have pet rats. If that's an issue then I'm not for you. I won't get rid of them. Well that's a few things about me lol. So tell me about you.

3/30/2017 10:41:16 PM
I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I want out of my journey. Ideally I want a life partner to explore and grow with. Not sure where my journey will end for now it seems to be a solitary one. I have learned a few things I like and don't like. I am not a massochist, I don't enjoy pain. I do prefer Daddy Doms so far but I don't think I'm quite a little. I don't want to play at being a child. It's the nurturing and caring of a daddy Dom that I like. Although I do watch Disney Channel a lot and I love anime, sci-fi, fantasy, and Disney movies. I also like to color sometimes when my mind won't settle. It helps calm my mind. I do like tease, bondage, ice, toys, and sensations (a light touch, the wind on my skin,) I don't like a man I can push over. That doesn't mean I want a man to not listen to me. I have a long list of things I want to experience and try and so many things in life I'd love to do. Life's a journey better enjoyed with those you love.

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lebsub4Master
 
 Age: 27
 Quebec, Canada