A D/s relationship is first and foremost, just that, a relationship, and in being that, it takes both people, the Dominant and the submissive in doing their part. Both have responsibilities and both have expectations. Many people seem to be making something mystical out of a lifestyle relationship, when in fact that does not change from vanilla to BDSM or any other lifestyle.

It takes both people doing their parts to make it work. And if either one is not then the other is not having their needs and expectations met. The Dominant needs to Dominate, and needs for the submissive to submit, to willingly and totally in most cases submit, but in turn the submissive needs the Dominant to Dominate, to act like the Dominant, with the qualities of one, that they are supposed to be, and just the same, the submissive has to act like the submissive they are supposed to be, The Dominant is not getting Their needs met when it doesnt happen. Its a mutual relationship with both having needs, responsibilities, and duties to fulfill the relationship, Nothing mystical about it.