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Greetings.
I'm a 31 year old Dominant living in Upstate New York. I no longer live in New York City, so you'd be better off finding someone who lives closer to you if that's where you are. I'm polyamorous and married to a man who has no interest in submission. I'm dating a man who also has no interest in submission. I'm not really looking for another romantic relationship per se. But sometimes, things have a way of developing in ways we never expected or originally wanted. That said, I don't deal with cheaters. I have no interest in being the final nail in your marriage's coffin. If/when you're single or involved with someone who isn't opposed to you having a Dominant, then we can talk.
I recently parted ways with my 24/7 submissive, and am taking my time in choosing someone new. It doesn't necessarily have to be 24/7, as that's a huge commitment to someone, and I'm not certain that I want to make it now. Or again. But I never rule things out completely.
Anyway, about me as a Dominant:
-I'm a Sadist. I enjoy hurting a willing submissive, whether it be by hand or tool. I very much enjoy corporal punishment (especially caning and spanking). I won't hesitate to slap various body parts or pull hair.
-I like service oriented submissives. I want my chores done appropriately and efficiently to my specifications. Whether it's house cleaning or getting me a drink, I want it done. I like using a submissive as furniture. Maybe I'll use you as an ashtray. Maybe a foot stool, or a soft place to sit. Or, if you're extra obedient, I'll let you dress like a pretty girl for me.
-Communication is of great importance to me. If something is hurting you in a way you don't ACTUALLY want or will damage you PERMANENTLY, I expect and demand that you use a safeword in scene. Or if we're outside of a scene, speak to me about it. There are no punishments for acceptable honesty, as safety and trust are paramount to me. By acceptable honesty, I mean coming to me and speaking maturely in a non-confrontational manner. Passive aggressiveness in any form will NEVER be tolerated (that also includes topping from the bottom, though there is a bit of wiggle space for bratting on occasion).
-I thrive on humiliation. Once I find a weak point, I make it even weaker. I'll salt your wounds over and over again as you beg for more. I will make you feel lower than you ever have before, but when it's over...you'll feel like a new person.
-I like body worship. I like to know how beautiful, aggressive and occasionally frightening I am to you. If part of me hurts, you'll rectify it.
-I like a bound, squirmy submissive. I love your discomfort. Whether I have you tied with rope/bondage tape, handcuffed or if I just dictated that you stay right where you are...your chosen misery delights me.
This is only a portion of where I dwell as a Dominant.
What I DON'T like:
-People who skim my profile and are ready to hand themselves over to me immediately. Be sensible. You don't know me from a hole in the wall. I understand that you want to believe the best of BDSM/kink community, that there are no predators posing as good people, but that's just a very bad idea. There are people just waiting to exploit you in ways you're not interested in, and they're always lurking. That said, you should always get to know someone first and foremost. (I'm not a predator. Well, not in the sense that I described above, anyway. I am predatory, but only in consensual situations.)
-Submissives who say they have "no limits". Sorry, but that's just not acceptable or believable. EVERYONE, including Dominants, has/have limits. If you have few limits, then I can look at that with a less critical attitude. Having few limits means you've been out there, you've tried some things. That maybe you didn't like some or a lot of the things you thought you would. There's nothing wrong with that! It doesn't impress a Dominant when you tell them you have "no limits". At least not me. It's a sign that you're just trying to impress me, and it's an empty endeavor. Just be honest. If we click, we click. If we don't, it doesn't mean we can't be friends, or pen pals or whatever else.
-People asking about my weight or other extremely personal questions right off the bat. It may seem innocuous to you, but it's actually very rude and off putting.
-Fake profiles. Seriously, if this is how you get jollies...it's sad. Don't waste my time. If I believe you to be fake, I WILL do an image search and message you what I find. It's just unnecessary.
-People who seem to think that I exist to get them off. I will NOT get on cam and masturbate for you. I will NOT show you my breasts or genitalia. I will NOT cyber with you. I'm not against any of those things, as I've done them in the past and they're highly enjoyable, but I don't do them with people I've talked to once or twice. Constantly harassing me to cam or chat with you before I'm ready (or if I'm unable to due to schedule constrictions, like my job or personal life) is just annoying. It becomes painfully tedious to be asked time and again to be seen on cam or Yahoo. I understand the importance of verifying identity with someone over the internet as much as possible, but it just isn't going to happen right away. I need to talk with someone for a short while before considering webcam stuff. That's just the way it is.
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