To whom it may concern,

In the past, I have endeavored to court young ladies of my own intellectual capacity or or greater, with the intent of forging a true partnership of common ambition and purpose.

This strategy has produced unsatisfactory results, therefore, I am now open to finding a sexual partner of a more subordinate nature.

She must be of substantially above-average intelligence.

She must be aesthetically pleasing and physically fit, without any significant medical problems of genetic disorders.

She should be of childbearing age and open to having at least two children within the next ten years.

In public, she shall be dress in impeccably presented and clearly provocative attire, such as one of the female minions from a James Bond film.

She must be trained, or willing to be trained, in appropriate skills such as genetic engineering, martial arts, or robotics. Ongoing education will be a permanent aspect of the relationship.

She shall be assigned additional duties relating to my interests, such as a research assistant, bodyguard or spy unless she has prior career or educational commitments of a substantive and fulfilling nature.

She must be open to travel anytime, anywhere.

This shall be a sexually exclusive relationship unless she happens to be bisexual, in which case, a third party might be added under controlled conditions.

She must be comfortable with stem cell research, cloning and the Occult.

She must value personal loyalty over national loyalty and morality over the law.

Please be sure to have a photograph on your profile that shows your body type and a clear image of your face, or include such in your message. Messages without clear photographs will either be ignored or prompt a request for one.

More information about me can be found by searching for me on MYSPACE or at PROFESSORWIDGET.TK, although I am remiss in updating both.

Your humble servant;

Professor Thaddius Widget