As much as I enjoy the idea of cuckolding, if I'm honest, I'll probably never engage in that type of dynamic. There are a variety of reasons for this, but the most important one is that I believe it would only be cuckolding if I were married to or in a primary relationship with the submissive being cuckolded. Since that's never going to happen, then, by definition, it's not cuckolding. The only way a cuckolding-style dynamic could work is if the sub gets off on the idea that his affection for Me is unrequited. 

When you contact Me, it's nice to know whether you're a novice or whether you have some experience with kink, but I don't need to know your entire fetish history. Oh, you've been trained? In what? With whom? And why does it matter?

None of that has prepared you to serve Me. Dominant women are not carbon copies of each other and I am not like anyone else you may have served in the past. Forget everything you think you know because you are in My world now. Do not assume you know what I want or what I like, because nine times out of ten, you'll be wrong.

Consider yourself an empty vessel waiting to be filled, a blank slate upon which I have yet to scribe My desires. At this point, you are nothing and no one, simply a lump of clay waiting to be molded to suit My whims. That is all you are to Me and that is all you will ever be until and unless we enter a dynamic. At that point, I will guide and shape you into the servant I require. But to reach that point, you must sublimate your ego and surrender to My will.

If your primary picture shows anything that can be covered by underpants but is not covered by underpants, I will automatically reject you. I will probably also block you. I have no interest in that shriveled little mushroom between your legs.

If you manage to prove yourself worthy of My time and attention, I will take control of your pathetic little stick figure. I will tell you when and if you may use it. Mostly likely it will be put into chastity and ignored so that you are better able to focus on Me and My desires.

Until then, keep it to yourself.

If you are a sub in search of a dominant woman, it stands to reason that you'd want to bring your A game when you contact people. Asking if a potential dominant wants to indulge your fetishes Does. Not. Qualify. Especially when you haven't so much as employed basic courtesy by introducing yourself.

Why in the world would you think she cares about your fetishes? Who are you? What do you have to offer her? Can you be useful in some way or are you just a wanker who brings nothing to the table but your masturbatory fantasies?

If you are so inept that you fail to comprehend the most fundamental social interaction, then you should confine yourself to pornography and stay away from other people. There is nothing about you that is special or appealing in any way. At most, you might find a woman willing to allow you to pay for a finite amount of her time and attention.

Acknowledge that fact, get used to it, embrace your fate. It's the best you can ever hope for.

Me > you

My Nexus 7 tablet arrived today, bought and paid for by My slave. I couldn't be more pleased. ^_^

My evening will be spent with My Kindle app and My Goth/Industrial/EBM radio station on Pandora.

"An interesting woman turns off as many men as she turns on." - E. Jean Carroll

I enjoy this quote.

Since I keep getting asked whether or not I use Teamviewer, let Me take this opportunity to state My feelings on this program in no uncertain terms.

I hate it and I will never use it.

I really have no idea why Teamviewer is as popular as it is. I have less than zero interest in rifling through someone's files, locking them out of their computer, or whatever the fuck else people seem to think I might do. Why is this even a thing? I do all the work while the sub sits there and watches. Boring.

That's not domination, it's just tedious. I like My subs to be active participants. It's only fun for Me if you have to WORK to please Me. If you suffer in the process, so much the better. 

If Teamviewer is your kink, more power to you. Find someone else who enjoys it and the two of you can knock yourselves out. But if you want to serve Me, you're actually going to serve Me, not just sit and watch Me rearrange the icons on your computer.

Nothing pleases Me more than denying slaves something they crave and then watching them suffer for My amusement.

Well, I was going to make a journal entry tonight but My gold-star lesbian - never been with a man and never will - girlfriend just waltzed into the room wearing a double-breasted, black, designer label suit, crisp white shirt, and an old-school Fedora like Sinatra used to wear.

HOLY FUCKING HELL THAT'S HAWT!!!

My brain is now mush and I will not be posting anything coherent.

All you little cuckolds can dream about the fact that I'll be fucking her senseless with my big, detachable cock. Suck it, bitches!

Writing deadlines eating up all of My time are at the top of My list of things that are less fun. Just sayin.

I'm hard at work editing the photos I took last night. However, I've posted a couple of outtakes on My profile for you to worship while you wait.

Prezzies for Me!

The first gifts from My new slave arrived today. He's such a good boy. I'll be posting photos of My gifts on My personal blog later tonight. PM Me if you want the URL.

I love it when new subs follow My instructions perfectly, fill out My application in detail, and submit it with a suitable tribute. Thank you (you know who you are). I'm running out the door to have supper with some friends, but I'll answer email later tonight.

Finally got the video journal feature to work. Of course, it *would* be on a day when I haven't bothered to do My hair or even wear makeup, but who cares? Now all you losers demanding Me to cam verify can go fuck yourselves.

What is up with so-called subs who spam Me begging to serve and then can't follow a simple set of instructions that consists of three steps?

Three. Fucking. Steps.

It just doesn't get easier than that but apparently it's waaaay too complex for these losers. How, exactly, do you plan to serve - not just Me, but ANYONE - if you can't follow directions? I swear, some of you are the most useless fuckwits on the planet. Seriously.

Happy International Women's Day. Celebrate by spoiling Me! It only takes 3.5 inches to satisfy Me and I don't care if it's MasterCard or Visa, LOL.

Stupid pig asked for something on My list of Hard Limits. Not only do I not put up with that shit, I took his money and turned him into My sissy bitch.

Who’s next?

Thank you to those who gave feedback and suggestions re: My last journal entry (you know who you are). ;-)

One of My hobbies is writing erotica. Last night, I dreamed of an interesting idea for a new story. It's about a young, submissive guy who meets a woman who helps him embrace and explore his cross-dressing fetish. Unfortunately, I woke up before I got to the part that would give Me the dramatic conflict. It's not a story without conflict.

So here I am, climax-less, staring at a half-finished story. Dammit! I hate it when that happens.

Tried something new with My pedicure this week. Did it like a French manicure. It was an interesting experiment, but I don't think I care for it. At least not when I'm wearing winter boots. Maybe for summer when I'm wearing sandals.

Wow, I've been sooo busy I haven't even had time to log in here.

Apologies to everyone who sent messages while I was away. I'll reply as soon as I triage My overflowing mailbox.

Happy New Year!

Who's going to be My first piggy of 2014?

Thank you to all of you who sent Me such lovely gifts...you know who you are. ^_^

My birthday is next week. I accept gift cards from Amazon and GiftRocket. I also have a wishlist.

Who wants to spoil Me?

Apologies to those who are waiting on mail responses. My roommate shared his lovely cold with Me so I will reply when I'm feeling better.

Sharpening My claws.

Stupid little fuckwit time wasters make excellent scratching posts. I'm ready to thrash a pig and make him squeal. Who's next in line?

For those who have been following My journal and read about the sub who mistakenly sent his CC info to Me, thank you for your kind words. I heard from him again, offering Me a monetary reward for My honesty.

I don't feel it's right to take money from him for nothing more than adhering to My own ethical standards. However, I couldn't bring Myself to turn down such generosity either. What's a girl to do?

Donate the money, of course! I instructed him to make a contribution in My name to one of My favorite charities, World Vision (www.worldvisiongifts.org), and send Me an Ecard as confirmation. I can't wait to open My email and see which gift he chose.

Earlier today I received an email with a sub's credit card info. Sounds like every findomme's dream come true, doesn't it? There was just one small problem...the message wasn't intended for Me.

I could easily have treated Myself to a sweet little shopping spree on the guy's dime and he would never have been the wiser. Maybe another findomme would have used the info. If I were some sort of scammer, there would be a new laptop, a Bowflex, and a flat screen TV on their way to My house right now. But where's the fun in that?

Never mind the fact it's illegal, it would also be poaching from another domme. I don't do that. It's also possible it was intended as a test to see what I would do. I won't even go there.

What's significant to Me is that I didn't have his consent. Even more important, he wouldn't know his money was being spent to pamper Me. I wouldn't be able to watch him squirm as I max out his card and know he's getting rock hard while I do it. I wouldn't be able to witness his exquisite suffering as I take control and drain his wallet.

There's no joy in that for Me.

So, I made him aware of his error and sent him on his way. I'm sure he'll be much more careful in the future.

Make no mistake, piggies...I don't need your money. I just love taking it, LOL.

Drowning in a sea of messages.

Someone send chocolate.

I've been asked more than once what was the largest/most valuable tribute I've received. One would think the answer would be simple, but it's more complex than it appears.

My love language is gifts. If you're unfamiliar with the 5 Love Languages, you can Google them. There's a book and an online personality quiz you can take to learn yours.

My past subs tended to buy Me gifts rather than give Me cash since gifts are My primary love language. I'm sure most financial dommes would take this opportunity to brag about the lavish gifts they've received, but I'd be lying if I said the most expensive gifts are the best.

I've received clothes, shoes, jewelry...one sub even adopted a Siberian tiger in My name! I think the most expensive thing I ever got was a latex dress that cost over $200, but it's not the item that meant the most to Me. One of the gifts that pleased Me most was a book. I don't think it cost more than $15 and it probably cost less than $10, but it had gone out of print so the sub had to go hunting through several used book stores to find it.

To Me, the sub's dedication is more important than the dollar amount.

From the "WTF?" file:

Messages in My mailbox from "Dommes" (read: dudes pretending to be women) who want Me to "help" them with a sub. Don't even waste My time with that nonsense; you're not fooling anybody. If you're really female and need help from another woman to dominate your sub, you're a piss-poor dominant and should get on your knees at My feet where you belong.

Pathetic.

Apologies to everyone who has messaged Me. This is the busy season with My 9-5, so I've barely had time to breathe let alone check email. I will probably not be terribly active on CM until after the first of the year, but I will do My best to respond to those who know how to start off on the right foot.

That means I will only be investing My valuable time and energy into those who understand and enjoy My kinks and I will not be wasting time on anyone who can't or won't spoil Me. I have a wishlist and you are welcome to PM Me for the link or for the link to My slave application.

Those lucky few who prove themselves worthy of My time and attention will get My Skype ID and I will arrange My schedule to engage in a brief chat with you so that we can get to know each other better. Be aware that I am not available to speak with you until after 8:00pm PST, so you will need to be available in the evening. If you are only available during the day, we are not going to be a good fit for each other. I'm not interested in having a sub who is not available for Skype chats at least one day a week.

First the video journal feature doesn't work properly and now the video greeting doesn't either. Ugh, seriously? WTF...

Gettin' real tired of your shit, CollarMe.

I just had a lovely conversation with a new boy. He was so sweet and respectful and turned over his money like a good little piggie. I love it when that happens. He has a lot of potential. We'll see how it goes.

Oh. Em. Gee.

While browsing through journals, I see more than a few so-called "dominants" [masters, mistresses, insert title of your choice here] complaining about slaves who list limits. As if a slave isn't allowed to negotiate what they will and will not do. What the fuck ever.

The way I see it, a slave has only one chance to say "No" and that's *before* they enter the relationship. Once that collar goes on, that's it...no more negotiating, only complete and total obedience, so they'd better negotiate like the dominant was the Devil himself.

That doesn't mean limits can't or won't change over time. If the dominant is worth his/her salt, the slave will become irrevocably bound, in both mind and body, to the point that they will not only do anything the dominant wants, but will beg to do things they would never do for or with anyone else.

To reach this level of enslavement takes years and a lot of careful planning on the dominant's part. It's a process that can't be rushed. There's no such thing as an instant slave. New and improved InstaSlave...just add water. Now with Doormat setting! Any dominant who thinks all it takes is a riding crop and some leather cuffs to extract that level of submission is fucking delusional at best and a psychopath at worst. Run far, run fast.

All of that being said, I know there are some equally delusional people who claim they are no-limits slaves/subs. I call bullshit. I'm willing to wager those same people would draw the line at having their arms and legs cut off and fed to dogs. I'm also willing to bet they'd draw the line at giving out their bank account and credit card numbers to the first dominant who demanded them without taking a whole lot of time to get to know them and establish trust.

I realize the world of kink is geared toward fantasy fulfillment, but let's try to maintain something resembling sanity, shall we?

Let's get something straight here, you pathetic little wankers. I am not - repeat NOT - going to give you My Skype ID or go on cam for you after only two messages, and you're FUCKING STUPID if you think you can manipulate Me into giving out My personal information. At best, you're just going to piss Me off and get yourselves blocked. There won't be a snowball's chance in hell of your wretched, sniveling ass ever getting the time of day from this Princess, let alone anything else.

That doesn't mean I won't go on Skype eventually, once we've established some trust with each other...but it is 100% up to Me when/if that happens. If you want My attention, you'd goddamn well better earn it.

Hop to it.