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I have met a wonderful girl, who is very sweet and submissive so I am off the market, and I married her. I hope all of you meet someone who is as nice as she is. Good luck and love, Dave. I am a straight dominant who does not switch. I love spanking and have been active as a disciplinarian for over 12 years. I am predominantly into spanking play and domestic discipline. I am keeping this profile open for friends and friendship, I don't mind giving advice about the local spanking scene and discipline and spanking in general. I also rarely email women on this site. I think it is intrusive and unwanted for the most part. If you would like me to send you a message please write first. I promise to be polite and sensible.

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5/25/2008 9:49:18 AM
The below is something I wrote in reply to a
email, I figures I would enter it just to give some idea of who I am and what I want.

I almost deleted your message thinking it was spam, but I kept it and read a few times and I think you are a real person in the DC area who is into spanking and domestic discipline (two things I love). I like the role play aspect of what you are seeking, I would like to be a sweet girls Daddy, one who would cherish and correct his sweetheart when necessary.
   One thing you should know in advance is that I am a strict disciplinarian, I would use a paddle, hairbrush, strap or anything else I see fit (that is reasonable) to correct you for unwanted or poor behavior and I can give a very hard handspanking. In private and in our scene moments I would be the dominant figure and you would be submissive always, any mention or even joking about spanking me or being dominant to me would result in instant discipline or as soon as possible in the correct environment. I would say you would usually have a red bottom from day to day as I do like to give play spankings as well as real disciplinary spankings. 
I understand we would look completely vanilla to the outside world, and I would expect complete discretion from you. I also understand negotiation and being reasonable, I am not a tyrant but I do like being in control. I am also well versed in spanking and dominance in general, I have been in the local DC scene for 12 years.
 I know what I am doing.
 I also act as a disciplinarian to a few friends who occasionally need some correction. I am monogamous by nature and prefer that in a relationship, but disciplining and play spanking friends is something I would insist on being able to do,  I have a large number of spanking friends (all submissive females), there is no sex involved but play and real discipline.  By the way I am a heterosexual, dominant SWM who is disease and drug free, I expect you to be DD free also. I do not smoke, if you do I would very quickly cure that addiction, believe me I have no problem dealing with issues like that.  
If this sounds interesting to you please feel free to contact me, if does not I wish you the best of luck in your search.
                        

10/21/2006 1:38:13 PM
This is something I wrote because of several lady friends who have been injured by improper use of paddles. Please excuse the length it is a subject I love to practice.

 

Proper school style disciplinary paddling


Recently I spoke with a lady submissive friend who complained to me of a severe paddling she got. The guy she was being disciplined by apparently did not know what he was doing and bruised her badly. This has been a common complaint I've heard from quite a few women into spanking and the scene in general. I've talked to some teachers who have practiced paddling, and have done it myself (and unlike the educators I was in consensual situations), so I thought I'd write a little about school style paddling and what I've learned about it.

One of the first things to consider is the implement itself and how it is going to be used. To me severe contusions (bruises) are to be avoided completely, these are dangerous and could lead to serious health consequences. I've also talked with a lady who suffered nerve damage from a too hard and heavy strike with a paddle. This is the kind of thing I would like to see avoided. The idea is to spank not beat. Using a school style paddle requires some basic knowledge and some care in use.

First of all choose a paddle that is somewhat safe to use. I prefer a 3/8's inch thick laminated plywood paddle without holes. I've found paddles with holes will cause overly severe bruising and welts unless used carefully. Besides if you apply a regular paddle properly you don't need the holes. Remember that school style paddles are made to be felt over several layers of clothing, a bare bottom does not have the extra protection.

Proper positioning is also vital. The idea is to have the maximum surface area to strike, this spreads the swat so that bruises won't form so easily. The traditional "bend over and grab you ankles" really is not the best position, it's hard for the person to keep their balance and does not allow for enough of a 'cushion' (also the lady in question has to be fairly lithe to do this). A better position is bent over, hands above the knees with the legs spread. This allows plenty of surface area to swat. If you position a girl over a table or chair than remember to have them spread their legs, this is not for sexual reasons but to spread the surface area.

I always insist upon a bared bottom, I need to see if the paddle strokes are causing harm. If a lady I'm playing with or disciplining is modest I will allow thong panties, but I do need to see the girls bottom. I do enjoy watching a bottom grow red, but it is also for safety reasons. I need to see if the bottom is getting bruised. Some girls bruise easily, so watch for white spots that are precursors of bruises. Of course with any discipline or play it's best to start slowly, so hand spank the lady in question first before going on to a hairbrush or paddle, see how her bottom reacts to hard hand swats. If her bottom bruises with your hand you may want to try leather implements.

This is how I stage a disciplinary scene, after we go over the safeword procedure (which if she uses, I'll tell her I'll either start over from the beginning or come back at a later time and paddle her again) I have the lady lift her skirt (I insist on skirts) and bend over a table or chair with her legs spread. I then lower her panties and tell her to keep her palms flat, and her face to the left (this is also a safety procedure, a school teacher once told me she needed to see if they passed out or had a seizure during punishment). I stand to her left with the paddle held like a tennis racquet, I place the paddle on her bottom and take two to three 'practice' swats without striking her so that I am sure I have the proper 'target' set. I always aim for the plumpest part of the bottom, where the girl sits and make sure that the paddle is flat to whack both cheeks, an off strike to one cheek can cause bruising.

I then will warn her it's about to start. Then I swing the paddle like a tennis racquet but WITHOUT adding great force. I try for a smooth, clean stroke and like tennis I am not trying to swat so hard as to loose control. I will then wait for at least the count of 25 (a school teacher recommended this) I will usually wait longer for at least one or two minutes, after all she's not going anywhere. This ensures she gets the full benefit of the sting. After the swat I'll place the paddle firmly on her bottom and rub it slightly, this helps my aim and warns her to brace for the next swat. One thing I make sure of is that the girl is not hopping around, usually girls will bounce on their toes or wiggle around right after a swat, make sure she's still before continuing. You don't want the paddle to strike on her legs or especially her lower back, so it is crucial she stays still.

Then repeat until her punishment is complete. My number of swats depends on the reason. Ten to twenty swats is about average, with a light paddle.  That's plenty to teach a good lesson and leaves room for extra if she misbehaves during or after her session. I insist on the girl being silent during her lesson, speaking only when spoken to. I tell her I expect only "Yes Sir, No Sir" in response, this saves a lot of whining. Also I warn her any yelling after a swat will get her extra, this will save your hearing and will keep the neighbors undisturbed.

I know a few disciplinarians who would argue allowing a 'safe word' during a punishment session but in case of a genuine emergency I think it is only prudent, you never know if the person is having a medical emergency or has decided that 'this is not for me'. By the way I have only had one girl use her safe word during a disciplinary paddling, she suddenly needed to use the bathroom after the second swat, so I started over. As for severe bruising, I have had some girls get bruised but nothing excessive, generally they are left with a bright red bottom. If a thick actual school paddle is used, expect large saucer size bruised to appear on each cheek, that is why I counsel against them.

The disciplinary style of paddling has a great social history in America, because of the prevalence of this type of punishment in our schools, quite a few girls (and boys) have experienced it or have a fascination with it. The warning "I'll paddle you!" has a real effect even on adults. As a voluntary behavior modification technique or as play (and sometimes it's in between frankly) it is something that strikes a deep chord in certain women. Just remember always be safe, sane and consensual and(and careful) and you can't go to far wrong.



5/18/2006 7:49:49 PM
This is something I posted to another group,
but I am sincere here.

I have been a disciplinarian/mentor for years now, and it can be very effective for some people. The main thing about a disciplinary relationship is  honesty. The person who needs discipline has to be honest about their behavior with the disciplinarian and they have to deeply want to change. When  they
transgress they have to own up to it and accept the punishment  that has been
agreed upon.
         On the disciplinarian's  side, he or she must be consistent and take the responsibility to tend to the person who needs discipline. A
disciplinarian cannot be half hearted, when  the situation calls for it punishment it
must be handed out. It may  inconvenient, it may be that friendship and personal feelings get in the way, but it has to be done.  If you let someone slide, even once, you have negated the sincerity of the commitment. I can say one of the greatest  mistakes a disciplinarian can make is allowing the miscreant to get away with the bad behavior, if it happens, it must be dealt every time.
    I have helped some women with some fairly serious  issues, and have been glad to be able to help them. If it is done right, a good disciplinary session can be the most effective therapy that person could receive. I know there are some people who say, if the person  loves to be spanked and play disciplinarily how could this work. It has to  do with the mind set of the disciplinary subject and with some girls, the level of severity that needs to be used. I know some tough cookies who would just giggle  at being threatened with a hard hand spanking and paddling while with others it would be just right.
  Like spanking and the scene itself it is not for everyone,  but I know it can be very effective for the right person.
                                                                                     Sincerely,  
                                Dave


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ashlynn0526
 
 Age: 43
 Boston, Massachusetts