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Considerations for Courtship

This is a working document. I will make changes as I feel I can express what it is I desire.

 

Please note that, unfortunately, as a woman seeking companionship on the internet, I'm often the target of what I feel are ridiculous propositions. So if any or the following appear to sound overly defensive or obvious, it's simply to help avoid confusion as we all have different ideas about what is interesting, acceptable or offensive.

 

That said, if you are considering a friendship with me towards courtship, please consider my requests prior to messaging me. I am seeking a long term relationship which may evolve into a 24/7 TPE. I enjoy a service submissive with skills - both sexual and non sexual- to bring to the table. I devote a lot of time and care to anyone I become involved with, and it is my hope to find someone with the capacity to reciprocate. Therefore I do ask for a lot.

• Please don't be in a rush. I am drawn to D/s because of its high level of intensity and intimacy. These things cannot be hurried. I need to get to know someone well in a vanilla manner prior to engaging in any kink, or at least at the level I am seeking long term.

• Please be a whole person and express interest in me as a whole person. If you only want a walking, talking bitch with a whip who will beat you in specific ways that you desire, then perhaps a pro-Domme is what you're seeking. Because I work as a phone sex operator, I know how to fulfill fantasies, but I am not interested in a busman's holiday. A relationship should be about the desires of both people involved. Anyone I own will be very special to me, and I want to be someone special to him. And we should have plenty of interesting things to discuss besides D/s.

• Please be single and available. I value honesty and integrity in all relationships. While I respect others who enjoy poly relationships, I am seeking a monogamous situation. Please be willing to focus your attention on our relationship as we move further into our involvement. Sexual involvement outside of a monogamous relationship generally does not work for me. I desire a respectful understanding about this.

• Realistically you should live somewhat near me--within a 100 mile radius preferably. If you live in Florida, or not within a reasonable commute distance from me, I cannot forsee our relationship working, unless you have a jet. If you're planning to relocate to somewhere near me, please contact me after you've settled in. Somehow plans don't always work out and I'm not interested in a long-distance relationship or an online only relationship.

• Please be interested in community. I like to attend events, and so consequently, if you become my submissive, I will want you to attend with me. This does not mean you need to be into public play. Ideally you are interested in being in the community to learn and make friends (even nonsexual, same or opposite sex friends), not just to meet women, because like any relationship, even a kinky one thrives on the support of the community.

• Please be introspective and know what you bring to the table, emotionally, physically, intellectually--in addition to any skills or services you have. Please articulately express yourself in reasonably well written English. A filled out profile to me indicates initiative, introspection, a desire to be understood, a sense of worth, and a willingness to stand behind the most important things you've said about yourself as consistent truths (although it's ok to be fluctuating and evolving too), and I find all of those things to be a huge turn on. You should know what turns you on and have some hard limits, and should be readily able to tell me what those are.  I will not accept a needs and desires inventory that comprises "anything that pleases you, Mistress," as I'm not a mind reader and I don't enjoy a no-win situation that's effectively a trap.  

• As I said, I am highly attentive to anyone I care for. I am seeking someone to reciprocate that same high level of attentiveness. I hope for someone who is good listener, curious and open to discovery. I am hopeful for someone experienced but open to someone new to kink.

• I enjoy flirtatious banter and provocative discussion. I am turned off by prurient interrogation. If you have questions or concerns about my kinks and our potential compatibility at the outset, I am very uninhibited and am happy to dispel any curiosity or concern you may have about any "must haves" on your kink bucket list. However, once our mutual kinks are confirmed, I do not wish to be pressured to perform them. I would prefer to get to know you in a more subtle, slow and seductive manner--it's more fun that way, don't you think?

I know, it's like homework, reading all that, right? Shall I get out my ruler?

 

Below are a few things I'd love to know about any potential partner. If you're unsure about what to write, here are some ideas:

• In your ideal relationship, what would you envision having happen on an average day?
• How did you become attracted to the lifestyle and what about it most appeals to you?
• What has been the most challenging need for you to have fulfilled, and why?
• What was it about me that inspired you to write to me? What would you like me to know about you? What else would you like to know about me.

Pretty, voluptuous, mature dominant woman seeks a household chore submissive/slave for strictly non-sexual "house boy"  or "sissy maid" services.

If chosen, you will be performing all manner of household chores, light gardening, errands, and grocery shopping, all while being kept in chastity. The right person may be allowed to participate in some light Mistress pampering. If I cannot find one person to meet all the requirements, I may seek several.

While this IS a kinky situation, and it may be highly arousing, there will be absolutely NO sexual contact. This is NON-NEGOTIABLE!

It's also absolutely important to me that if you're involved with a vanilla or D/s partner, that this arrangement isn't something you need to hide from them. I don't want to involve myself in a lie, as that isn't how a trusting relationship is founded.

• You should be skilled in laundry, cleaning, mopping, vacuuming, dusting, and window washing. As you may be sent to the grocery store and/or Farmer's market, you must be able to identify the best produce, meats and have an ability to shop economically.

• If you are skilled in cooking, you may be asked to prepare meals.

• You should be able to work quietly and independently, but capable of making polite, entertaining conversation when required.

• A strong candidate will have foot massage, pedicure and hair brushing skills.

• I would prefer a male, but am open to all genders, TGs & CDs. Your ability to serve is most relevant.

• The ideal candidate will be exceedingly polite in manner, have some lifestyle experience in service submission, and will understand and respect protocol as negotiated between us.

• You must be willing to purchase and wear a chastity device during service. Extended key holding may be negotiated, but there will be no sexual contact between us. You will bring the device, put it on in my bathroom, and I will provide you with a lock, to which I will be holding the key.

• You will remain dressed during service with your genitals covered. How you are dressed will be negotiable.

• You must own your own car and have a valid driver's license and proof of insurance.

• You must not have a criminal record, and be willing to submit to a background check.

• You should not be allergic to cats. You will be responsible for cleaning the cat box as well.

• Because this position requires a good deal of trust, you will be interviewed and we will meet several times in a vanilla venue (coffee, tea, lunch etc) prior to service. We will have a trial period and if suitable you will be placed under contract, the terms of which the appropriate person will have some degree of input.

• This is not a live-in position. You must have time available to provide services, and your schedule will be considered. Your living situation and marital status are irrelevant, excepting my note above that you are required to be honest with me and any partners you may have.

What's in it for you, besides the pleasure of making Me happy?

I would be willing to indulge certain desires or needs, such as a need to wear women's clothing or a maid's uniform while working, a need for discipline, a need for verbal degradation and humiliation, a need for enforced chastity. Proper paddling, whipping and flogging may be issued if things aren't done perfectly, and believe me, I own a white glove! None of these are required, simply examples of things that could happen with the right person.

You may also earn the right to pamper me via foot rubs, pedicures, scalp and shoulder massages and pedicures.

You may even be called to lay out my clothing, and help me get ready prior to a date.

However, lest you think it's about you--your needs and interests will be considered-- but ultimately are irrelevant. This isn't a trade.

All limits will be honored, of course. I'm a strong believer in communication and clearly laid out expectations.

Sound fun?

Interested parties should message, explaining in 1,000 words or less his qualifications for the position. The ideal candidate will demonstrate proper, expressive and imaginative use of the English language, correct spelling (or use of a spell checker), and a keen reflection of the requirements for the position, as well as his own needs and interests.

One Final Note

I value submission and I value the person offering it. Please do not come to me looking for abuse or reinforcement of a truly worthless sense of self. I want someone who understands his gift and takes pride in what he has to offer.