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	missingtouch



	I am welling to explore online romance with males or females...yet my preference is for feminine submissive personalities and body types.Open to emails... and chat. Cam and texting after a time of getting to know one anther.Taking a brake Second life....but been playing IMVU a little in evening now and then.I like creative games that let you build and create... role playing with enjoying romance with others find of interest. And exploring side of life I do not see as healthy in real life.I will meet some one easily if they live close by... yet if your over 50 miles away there must be a spark from some online romancing before I will bother with meeting in person. Yet there are exceptions when people become very close. But I am not here to send any one money... all these people saying you must come and get them or send them cash for them to move. And you really dont know them for week yet. Just seem like catfish and cons.I am a open an honest book if you like to ask questions. Yet do keep in mind only ask question you be happy to answer your self. I do like to know peoples answer to there questions before I answer there question. And I live by this standardtalking about my self and ask a person there view on it.Please dont bore me with one to five word messages.... Give me more then couple sentences to read. Details are the key to catching my interested and glimpse of your inner thoughts would be lovely to see.There no need to hide who you are online... better to be honest chase off those that wont accept you. I could easily live in relationship of DDlg but I am firm Dom that focus on control with love and care. But there are times a man must have a firm hand. As little girl, sub, or slave will always test what they can get away with. Best relationship are built on love and care. When people open up and are honest with one anther. One makes sure there girl is mentally healthy and there body is healthy. Then they can do there best to please you. And very lovely to have girl tied up... to play with and explore there mind and body.... to make squirm and moan. Scream out in pleasure and beg for more. To strive to be pleasing. To punish them self worst then you could if there ever not perfect in your mind.

12/15/2021 10:00:09 AM

OH is the journal finaly working again after so many years...

4/10/2018 5:17:24 AM

**Fair warning this is a rant from reading BS all day.**

You read sight saying a real master does not demand to be called Master... he should say please call me my name.

Reading this I found my self cringing at the thought of it...

But yet I read all these slaves and subs profile stating there position and stats. And training they have had but are being released.

Really both sides are flaunting it just as badly... it makes me cringe and feel rather sick.

I know for most I move to slow on relationship but I put health and safety first. Girl going to act like filthy slut. Sadly have lost my interest with not even passing my first test of moral standards.

Going to state you been through training. You have learned all you need to. Had how many partners and know how to please man and women.

Time for me to walk away... think there nothing I know you want to learn.

After all your happy knowing how to please groups of radium strangers. That likely are going to throw you aside when done with you.

I think I am sadly growing to despise people that are experience in this life style... as they talk like spoil insecure stuck up brats.

Far to often these days conversation just lead to what are you going to do for me. Pay for this. I do not recall saying I was a sugar daddy or sub/switch.

I feel crazy almost for wanting to enjoy romance and grow close bond with who I would take in. Enjoy a deep and meaningful conversation and get to know them.

Train them to what I want and keep them close... I will never understand investing time into some thing and to throw it aside.

2/13/2018 11:44:23 AM

The mask has slip off and the mask has been broken.

I am proud of my past and the scares it has left me with. I live with pride that I have taken care of my family.

Yet alone now I am experiencing true freedom. Nothing but my own abilities holding me back.

Daily I feel like I am growing stronger... there days I feel week and have set backs. But only lead me to path I know I am meant to take.

New life style habits I have taken to.

With not sure if I could handle a job... I have pushed my self to put dozen hours a week in at foodbank north of me. Volunteering have found best way to make good friends one can count on.

With friend help from the foodbank was able to replace the heating furnace of the house when it quite working. Likely saving me a couple thousand to have some one else do it.

Learning to be more of handyman.

The last few months I have stop eating out, it far to over price and most often not even healthy. Only exception I will make is enjoying others cooking and in trade later sharing my cooking with them. Or going to potluck.

I have learned about the keto diet. Finding it works very well for me.

For those not knowing what keto diet is. It high fat diet, moderate protein, and low carb focus.

Most people online recommends 50 carbs. But I have found I have to go as low as 10 to 20 carbs. And be careful not to eat to much protein. And it was tricky figuring out fat I liked as my taste change with the diet.

I lost 75 lb with diet in four months. How ever with holidays fill off the wagon and gain back 30 lb.

It been hard to want go back to diet just yet sense am enjoying eating my Mother cooking of can soups and stews we water bath up. Sense on the diet they taste bad to me.

As my Mother cooking runs out I am sure I will be going back on the keto diet... And see it as life style simple to stay with. But still may let my self have brake with holidays at times.

Back to not eating out. I love my own cooking it often better then any I could pay for. Yet I cheat little with buying some thing in bulk like bread fry chicken. But later I fry it in a non hydrogenated lard in cast iron skillet. Sense I have respect now for true fat from the keto diet.

I buy meat in bulk now and pressure cook it up into jars... it nice to have full shelf off meat I can pick from to mix into meal for my diet any time I have craving. It strange to have half full freezer... only filling it when I see a sale. Until I can pressure cook the meat up.

Later I may replace my shopping for meat with hunting for it.

I was raised with old fashion values. I see my self as survivor and the simple things make me most happy.

I have no plans to put a new mask on. Let others simply see me for who I am.

5/7/2017 12:43:07 AM

It strange feeling to find one self feeling very deeply alone.... Even as you know friend are there for you and distant family. But they all have life's of there own.

At the end of march my Mother past away as they where trying to replace her pacemaker.

She chose to raise me as single parent... as my father did not wish to be in the picture. Leading to close relationship.
Was a only child.... they say we know how to handle best being alone. Times like this I some what wonder.
At age of 13 had to grow up fast helping more about the house.... As arthritis hit my Mother very hard. Taking on more responsibility... seeing to house hold task that needed done. Growing into taking over on most every thing.

Doctors did get my Mother on meds that help her arthritis at the end of my time in High School. Allowing me to get little form home going to college for bit.
Yet as caregiver that state employ came into home... often using and abusing my Mother. I choose to come back home and take over the job of Caregiver. Bring order to house hold and sitting budget plans in place. So my Mother would not give people the shirt off her back with out thinking about the house hold being stable.

I been making plans around my family always.... having assume I find partner and have children. Intern giving my Mother grandchildren. In away having white picked fence and growing family.

But it feels like it mask I have had on that has slipped off...
Maybe shock of loosing some one so close..... two weeks of body chills... and then having chest cold. Still dealing with emotional triggers.

This alone time letting me think about and plan what I really want and need.

Only Plans right now is to let every thing melt away that holding me down. Probably be going to local trucking school and get a CDL sense I don't think I can be a caregiver for some one else. At most I want get lost in getting paid to travel... and long distance driving does not sound bad.

Granted I still want to find a relationship with some one.... they just must be open to traveling with me.

5/7/2017 12:00:57 AM

"Live in Alaska for first part of my life... and now turning 33 moved to Washington state for family reasons. And sense I like to do little travailing until I find a place I like settle down. And then get into gardening and raising animals for food."

I have focus on learning skill to run a house and save money where I can.

11/9/2015 1:02:09 PM

hmmm.... ok I am missing Alaska.

About every other first meet I was stood up in Alaska... Yet people here seem to love saying there happy to meet yet never show up.

15 first meet and stood up for each one.... not one give up. Yet shame to have my time wasted like this. Two week or more of talking only to be stood up.

I don't mind online role playing but keep it there and make it clear you got no intention of meeting.

Playing a catfish... sooner or later some one going to catch you. Gut you and fry you up.

7/26/2015 10:04:32 PM

Been Away for a wile sense family matters came up... And now made the move to Washington state. To help take care of my Mother and Grandfather.

And I say right now looking for good new friends... and maybe some pleasing long term company.

4/11/2012 1:19:33 PM

So little update I have signed up for ... finding it enjoy able and some what better way to meet up with locals to make some open mind friends.

Yet does not seem I have missed out on much with not loging into this site for month. In fact first person I message read my message and then she dispears from search. The search for a relationship sure feels pointless when you do not even get a response to your messages.

2/28/2012 8:49:15 PM

Yes I can be sweet... some times a bit chewy and sour. Hard to swallow at times. Though for the most part just big teddy bear nice to cuddle up with, unload all once worries, and let them go and relax. And if you don't I'll tickle your side or slap you on the bottom tell you do.

2/27/2012 9:02:23 PM

The Olive Tree

A confused sub came before a wise Master who adored her.
She felt that to submit to Him would mean she would open her heart to unbearable
pain should He ever leave her. She hungered for Him and needed Him, but was
ready to walk away in panic.

The gentle Master knelt her before Him and
started a tale of love and devotion. As she looked up at Him, His arms began
to widen and open like a large tree stretches it's branches to the sky. At
that moment the Master appeared rooted to the floor and His impressive size
towered above her like a giant tree. Then he began to speak.....

I'm here for you...now and always no matter how far time and space takes us...Whether
you walk away from Me today or you stay and serve Me, I will not turn from you.
I am as patient as time itself, I will take not from you unless you give freely
and completely of yourself, but I give onto you regardless..for My love is unconditional...

Like the olive tree that can both feed you and shade you, I am there seemingly
eternal to your short life on this earth. If you need My fruit to feed your
hunger, I will give you all the fruit you need. If your skin grows dry and
loses its luster, the oil from My fruit will restore it and make it glisten.
When you need comfort, My leaves will gently caress your face with the slightest
breeze. When you need discipline, My branches will correct you when the wind
blows strong. If you just need My shade to protect you from the sun, My branches
will shade and protect you. If you need warmth at the night My fallen branches
will fuel the fire to keep you warm and safe.. If you need a refreshing breeze,
My leaves will fan you and cool you down. You are my gardener.

When you submit to Me, you tend that which keeps Me vibrant and full of life.
When you kneel under Me and till the soil, you give breath to My roots. When
you water Me, My sap flows strong through Me raising my limping Branches. When
you soil yourself collecting fertilizer with your bare hands, you strengthen
and humble Me with your devotion.

Although My life will go on, life would not be the same without you.

Your dedication and unconditional care for Me keeps Me vibrant and nurtures
My very core. The sustenance and protection I give you seems little reward
for your servitude. Still the gardener serves the tree from her heart and the
tree gives to her heart all the He can!

I am planted firmly on the ground and cannot follow you if you walk away from
Me...But be assured I will survive. One hundered years later and two of your
lifetimes; I will still be there, waiting for you in the same spot to offer
you all that I do now.

Stay with me and be my gardener. You cannot get lost in Me for we are complementary
to each other. I am your devotion, and you give meaning to my existence. Apart
we live life and survive; together we bloom eternally!

....As the Master finished His last words, the sub cried herself to sleep at
His feet. That night, He stood planted there like the Olive Tree offering her
His unconditional love and protection as she slept. As she would tend to Him
with her devotion the next day...and everyday thereafter!

Author unknown but admired

This was gives to me by slave I had in Second Life a few years back. Sense I remind her so much of it... are relationship has been an off and on one but I'll always be there for her to come back to.

2/24/2012 1:57:40 AM

This site sure likes suprising me... intersting how it tell me my message to some one gotten delete with out them even reading it. My first thought Dam now I really want to slap this one around and abuse her. My second thought wait a min she a Masochistic and probly does this to get a rise out of people. My final thoughts dam I hate mind games. *sighs and roles his eyes*

2/20/2012 6:51:14 PM

Well sense joining the site my focus mainly has been locally... Think it time I start branching out. With exploring some online romances. With any luck well find a long term one that would be welling relocated to Alaska for me.