As always, Thank you for visiting and hopefully reading.

Good luck with your search and on your journey :) 

~ NaniGoddess

As always, Thank you for visiting and hopefully reading.

Good luck with your search and on your journey :)

~ NaniGoddess

My thoughts on what I've noticed about the very flawed D/s communication breakdown on this site so far. 

*Warning typos ahead, I never proof read. It's a thing, you'll survive.

Firstly, I have had some amazing conversations with some very interesting people since joining this site. I've also met a few quality submissive men who I look forward to continuing to get to know, play with and possibly collaring one of them in the future. The following does not pertain to those people :)

Now on to it then,

When I first joined this site a few subs seemed shocked that I responded thoughtfully and respectfully to their emails. I did not understand why and they helped by explaining that most Dominant(s) on the site were unapproachable and even rude at times. With that in mind I tried to make an attempt to respond to everyone who took the time to write to me. Even if I was not interested in them. I was new to the site and all of the fresh faces, conversations, personalities, jokes, stories, interests and kinks felt exciting and amusing. Also like I stated in my profile, I genuinely enjoy talking to and getting to know new people.

Well I am now beginning to understand why Dominant(s) on this site might seem mean and unapproachable and incase non of them have ever taken the time to explain I will attempt to do so now. 

I am fairly new however, as I understand it the D/s relationship is one where both the D and the s are agreeing to use on another. A Dom(me) enjoys using a sub and a sub enjoys being used. The fundamental breakdown in communication which I've noticed in my short time here is that both sides would like to think that only one side is getting used. 

- subs want Dom(mes) to pretend not to notice that they are being used by subs.
I mean really subs, We KNOW YOU ENJOY IT...LOL... you want it!!! and without a us you would not be able to get it.

- Equally Dom(mes) you need those subs... it is not easy in the vanilla world to find a person willing to let you do those sick and painful things to them. I know, I was into converting for a long time ;)

I believe some of mutual respect is always necessary! While I do not partake in Financial Domination myself, I see how it came about.
Being a Dom(me) especially on a forum such as this one takes a lot of time, energy and effort. Every sub wants your attention, every sub wants to play, every sub wants to chat, every sub asks the same questions over and over again. It can start to seem a little like a job, when initially it was meant to be a form of release.

To make matters worse subs... you get upset and throw a temper tantrum when you don't get attention...lol.

FYI: Not all Dom(mes) find whining attractive. And certainly not before they have decided to play with you.

Personally I enjoy the D/s courting process, "how soon is too soon?" "how much is too much?" I ENJOY GETTING TO KNOW THAT PERSON. Before I humiliate them. I think Information is the sexiest sex toy EVER!... it's all very hot to me. But it seems that I am alone in this way of thinking.
To many on this site Dom(mes) AND subs alike!!!!!!  it seems that the D/s relationship is a business transaction. And if you treat a Dom(me) as if they work  for you... WHY DO YOU THWN GET UPSET WHEN THEY WANT TO BE PAID? 


MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE(s)

I have been on this site for less than a week, and in that very short time I have received over 200 emails and I am not sure how many friend request and private chat request. I have tried to be nice and respond to as many as I can and in return all I have received are rude comment from people who assume that I won't respond to them, simply because I have not gotten back to them within 24 hours of them sending their message. Though my page clearly states what I am not interested in them, I am constantly being asked to by people who are the opposite of what I am looking for to reconsider and when I refuse, I am verbally attacked. *Le sigh* It's equal parts amusing and annoying. 

SO I would like to take this time to point out a few things I believed to be obvious, but hey, I've been wrong before...lol.

1. I am NOT interested in pleasing all of the people all of the time.
2. I am a regular everyday human being. Stacked and Blessed, Yes! But a human being none the less. (two hands...amazing as they may be!)
3. I am not employed by you:  you do not pay me to spend hours of my day responding to emails, answering the same questions over and over... and most importantly... You do not pay me to give you my time and attention simply because you want it.
4. No, I won't change what I am looking for if you offer to pay me.
5. No, your blank profile and 1-8 letters/words message doesn't really make me hot for you. 
6. No, I'm not going to ask you for a picture. I am sure if you wanted me to have one you would have provided it with that riveting "Hey ma'am you have YIM?" message you sent me {{several times}}.
7. No, I will not humiliate you over Skype, even though it does nothing for me, simply because you begged {{several times}}.
8. No, if you say something rude I will not become enraged and want to beat or humiliate you.
9. No, I will not submit to you because you are a man and you typed the word DOM in your very catchy but not at all intelligent or stimulating username.
10. No, you may not fuck me. I would offer to fuck you... but I do not find you attractive, which is what brought us to this list in the first place.
11. No, reverse psychology won't work. 
12. No, writing to me {{several times}} after I have clearly stated that I am not interested does not magically make me interested. 
13. Just because you can see that I am online, does not mean that I am available to you.
14. Yes, I am selfish and only care about myself. Why??? Because I can touch this ass and these tits whenever I want to, and shit like that just goes to a persons head :).
15. If by chance I am interested in you and I offer my time and effort to get to know you, you have a very short window of opportunity to 1. prove that you are real and 2. prove that you are willing. Why? because I have an instant gratification and short attention span problem... "Squirrell!" :)
16. Yes, I can, will, and I am certainly able to ignore you. (and I can do it without blocking you... it's a MAGIC trick called "I don't really know you so you don't really matter!").
17. You are not real to me... Until I am interested, you are in fact words on a screen.
18. Allow me to offer a Piece of Advice: Try being nice, interesting, detailed and enticing words on a screen sometimes.
19. Yes, trying something different works sometimes.  Try it!

The bottom line: (for those who like the cliff notes) This is my page and you are requesting my time and YES FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY I am here because I want to please MYSELF... yeah, NO, I really didn't create this page to make you happy and to get you off... I KNOW it's hard to wrap your mind around that, but I believe in you... You Can Do It! :)

As always, Thank you for visiting and hopefully reading.

Good luck with your search and on your journey :)

~ NaniGoddess