Men I don't want to get mails from (even less want to Top)

 Livein slaves - No thank you. I don't have the accomodations for anyone else to live here than the ones who actually already do. Basic fact: I like to know someone very well before having them moving in with me (if ever).

 Sissies, transvestits, transexuals - I prefer my men manly. Preferrably in a nice buisness suit. Thanks! And no - I don't want you to sniff my panties either.

 Toilets - I don't want a human toilet. No, I don't want to forcefeed you my feces either.

 Economic slavery where I'm the SugarMommyDomme - No, I'm not gonna be your passport to Sweden and a "better life" for you, no matter what misery you live in today. I'm sorry but no, wont happen. Neither do I want any students submitting to me while they study here, paying their rent or giving them gifts.

 Secret slaves needing total discretion because they're married, having such an important job or field of business or simply are too afraid to even look at their own submission in a mirror. You guys are too boring. If you can't even take me out to dinner - don't bother at all.

 Newbies, newcomers, men who have never submitted before or the ones who've only doen it on cam but never in real life - Please. Go to a Pro! cause you're too boring as well. It's no fun having to have silkgloves on the whole time.

 Online slaves - who are only into submitting on cam, skype, yahoo or the likes. I don't do online. Ever. No!

 Women - Sorry but I already have all the submissive ladies I've ever wanted. Not searching. Same goes for submissive couples. Nope. Njet.

 Submissives not able to travel here to visit me or without means to have me visiting (by paying my expenses such as airline tickets etc) - Since I don't do the whole online thing it's pretty dumb to mail me unless you're actually able to meet me in person.

Someone said my last journal entry was hard to understand. Someone else felt the need to write me and inform me that slavery isn't legal. Duh! As if I didn't know. Someone told me that my last ownership wasn't for real since my owned slave ran away and left me. Quite the contrary. He ran away because he got scared of himself, his own feelings and of not being able to control me as men are used to control their women. I believe he got scared because he loved me too much and didn't truly believe I'd love him equally as much in return. Anyway. Long time ago. Ever since I've only been into men taking care of themselves as well as catering to my needs.

I don't do the whole owner/owned thing ever again. No. Njet. Nein. You want to impress me? Please feel free to try. I especially enjoy type A males being successful, mature, attractive. Goodlooking is a plus but most important is his intellect and intelligence. He should be a true gentleman and of course be more than generous towards me.

Send me some flowers and write a poem on the card.

Take me out dining.

Seduce me.

Be my guest.

But do understand. I wont own you.

If you're a good boy I'll fuck you and whip you silly though.

 Mmm... No. I don't own. Nor do I want to own. I'm done pretending to have ownership over someone. Each and every human being belongs to him or herself. The free will rules. Overrules any and every thought on owning another.

Sometimes I wish it wasn't so. I wish it would be possible to own. I wish it was up to me and me only to decide whom to own. If I could ... I would own one. My one.

The one I would want to collar as Mine.

For me, BDSM is always present and it's the way I like it to be in my relationships as well. Not present visibly to others, I prefer to leave the public out of my sexuality as well as relatives and friends not into the lifestyle. Truth to be told though, most of my friends now days are into the lifestyle one way or another but I'm sure you get the picture. BDSM and the relationships between me and Mine are between us and none else.

 I'm an alpha. The alpha. I'm the leader of my pack. I'm the only Domme. None tops me even if there's a packmember of mine being a switch of her/himself. She/he may top others but not me. No, nay, never.

 I don't mind switches at all. Honestly I love to train and teach them to become better tops by leading by example and by them to get their learning by doing (yes, I once was a scout). Few things makes me as proud as when watching one of mine topping their own.

 As you can tell I'm not into jealousy and neither should you be if wanting to be close to Me. One can struggle with jealousy and it takes time to get over it and become aware that's a totally useless way of feeling, jealousy simply makes no sense.  

 I want mine to be strong, selfconfident, mature, adult human beings with good selfcontrol and glowing selfworth and brilliant selfesteem. THEN I'll happily humiliate you for fun and pleasure for both of us! But always only within a sexual context. As a human I want mine to be the best they can ever be. I love to coach and bring forth gems and damonds from what seemed to be ordinary rocks in the first place, or even lumps of coal!

I miss a man at My feet, worshipping them. There's something very primitive, very natural and very special when finding a perfect two way connection with a man deeply into footworship.

 I've never felt more feminine, as the times I've been exploring this special kind of worship/kink with a man. The sensation when he gently tucking my foot within his palm, holding it, caressing it. Looking it adoringly. It makes me feel supreme.

 In truth I've only ever discovered this with one man even if I've been a Domme for several years having had multiple submissives but I hope, I truly do there must be at least one other out there able to make me feel as beautiful, powerful and truly feminine as he made me feel. There must be! Or I refuse to be a part of the World any longer. I can't ache for something that's not there anymore. I need a new submissive man who worships Me!

 Please do write Me if you feel like you've got a haunch of what I'm taking about.

I need to feel it again. I need to be put back into life again. *softest of smiles* The mourning period is over.

There's a hole in the heart

An empty space of valid void

A void with no other meaning

than showing off the true space of empty hollow nakedness.

In the footsteps of the Queen with no companion

Through the summernight without the starfilled heaven in sight

Past the pilgrim with the lonely lantern shining dull in pale moonlight

Crossing path with the missing spaceman without means to go home.

There's a broken bone in the body

An endless tear of transparent ache

A pain without meaning

showing off the true loss of tender loving care.

And so the waves erasing footprints in the sand

Even when larger than life

the windy waters spare none

no prayers, no matters, no promises

and most certainly no hope.

The wind found its way inside, coming from a longdistance call

 From the cracks in the concrete wall.

The Winter moulted its skin as we crawled through.

For a few moment breathing was easy on our crushed limbs.

Looking into ourselves, eyes beaming in the pale dullness of light.

Mirroring astounding souls.

How did we manage without for so long ?

Merging

One

Caught in the riptide. There was a reason, I collided into you. Calling your name in the midnight hour. Reaching for you from the endless dream. So many miles between us now but you are always here with Me.

I still don't recall the first time we met but I know you do. I've tried to reconnect to the memories but I can't seem to find them. Fragments yes but not the whole meeting, it was too long ago. But I clearly remember the first time we spoke on the phone cause your voice did things to me no other voice has ever done. Not even near for all these years.

Your voice is like being completely safe in an earthquake, its like finding shelter in an storm. It's like a match to a tank of gasoline, well, a tank of gasoline trying to compose herself anyway.

I've never encountered the same feeling of making love, by having a conversation over the phone about seemingly mundane things with anyone else as I do with you and the few times when we indeed did speak of youknowhat My mouth always went as dry as other parts of me ended up wet as the Niagara falls. It's always been like magic, the emotions you address in me. I'm sure you could've read a boring book or the morning paper and still I would listen intensely. I want to have your voice saved within me for rainy days such as these. It would help me copy.

I need your voice.

Please save me.

you've got My number.

I needed you at the playparty last weekend. I did. It was a deep dull ache coming from some unknown place hidden inside of me. First, in the afternoon while I was chatting with some other dominants over teacups, coffeemugs and buns with vanillafilling and cinnamonsprinkles

I needed your presence on the floor next to Me. I wanted to have you there, kneeling in your collar, caressing and massasing My feet, gazing up at Me every now and then, sharing a smile with Me over something someone said or quietly asking Me with your eyes only for permission to eat or drink.

We've always been so syncronised, almost telephatically connected to each other when together but we never got around to showing ourselves off in a D/s context with others using a protocol. I would have liked if we did. At least once under a blue moon. In an environment where you felt at ease showing off your devotion to Me and with other people respecting D/s relationships to the fullest.

Well, who am I kidding, I'm the Domme with the runaway slave and the empty collar, your devotion to Me isn't what it used to be and maybe its gone forever. Maybe all there is left is this horrible ache of missing you and the amazingfeeling of being a Goddess when you did submit may eventually fade into a fond memory ? Instead of this. This longing. I doubt it. My ache for you isn't subsiding in the slightest.

I needed you at the playparty last weekend. I almost misplaced My new heels and had to go back for them. I didn't drink enough water and got a headache a few hours into the evening. Half an hour after midnight someone reminded Me that maybe I needed something to eat. Just as good as I am taking care of everybody else, just as bad am I taking care of Me. I'm not doing well without. I'm simply not. Even if doing my very best to survive without you near me.

There where quite a few willing submissives and bottoms wanting to be under My whips and within My bondage but none of them had an interest in me as a person. To them I was a Domme. A Mistress among other Mistresses. Someone who could administer pain, grant wishes and fulfull needs. Theirs.

I needed you to fulfill Mine.

Still do btw.

Reaching out. Placing a hand on your neck. Directing your lips towards My foot. Almost reluctantly holding My breath, least skipping a heartbeat or more, when feeling the tip of your tongue against My toes. Moist. Warm. Ever so slightly suckling while your hands are caressing My calves, heels,all the way to the softness of the sole where your fingers meeting your tongue and the magic begins once again.

Closing My eyes. Drifting away to the easy beat of your thumb and forefinger playing on My sole. A lovesong, so sweet and so ancient your fingers automatically knows its rythm. I'm silently humming along to our unique closeness not needing a single word. Explanation not needed. Lost in translation.

All there is as usual are your eyes meeting Mine when you look up at Me from your designed position on the floor. The look from your eyes transforming Me into a pure Goddess. One of might. One of dominance. One of worship. I bask in them. Glorified! Ignited! On fire! And then I shove all My toes into your mouth.

Yes, that's it. Lick, slave! Make love to My feet !

I get many mails from men wanting to be My slaves. While I deeply appreciate your interest I'm not searching for a new slave. My heart's not there. Not yet, well to put it bluntly,  most likely never.

I have playpartners. I'm living with a Male Switch and His lady and both him and his slavegirl submits to My will when My sadistic hunger and need arises. Therefore I'm not desperate. I guess I would have been if I didn't had these two wonderful people close to Me.

I also have two beautiful submissive ladies (both polyamorous switches) whom I use/love/cherish on occasion.

And I partake in the local Swedish BDSM scene with an abundance of playparties if one so wishes.

I miss a certain someone. I have his collar here and truth to be told, he's the only one I want to own.

I'm happy to meet with you if travelling to South of Sweden and wanting someone to guide you into the local scene here or if visting My hometown Helsingborg and wanting someone to have dinner with. I'm always game for meeting interesting BDSM people from around the world.

But

I'm not looking for a slave.

Only wanting Mine to come home.

One of those most maginificent Femdom songs/lyrics are the Velvet Underground, Venus in furs and Johan Cale on violin adds a both gothic and malevolent aura to it. Please listen to it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15GGl7vvGVg

it's powerful! it speaks right to My heart. Anf I don't even like violin in the first Place. I'm much more of a Electric guitarr girl. *softest of grins* Yet this is Power. I'm dreaming about conducting a hard whipping scene to this song, maybe followed by Nightwish and Rammstein! A few other great artists with a "BDSM overtune" to their songs.

This for example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4K6ZxDwi34

God! Give me a rough Concrete Environment and My slave hanging from the roof in chains! Upside down! And please let Me whip him with My single tails. Grr! *need*

Könnt ich mich hören! Könnt ihr mich fülen ?

I truly need to whip someone today. Pity he isn't here!

Ten days without words from you now. It's beginning to eat at Me. Slowly, subcutantly growing on Me. The loneliness. One would have thought I would have been used by now, being without you, but the past three months gave Me so much hope and I had begun to start dreaming about a future in which you would kneel by My bedside at night, asking permission to be allowed to be climbling up, joining Me underneath the covers.

Just as close as your voice used to be caressing My ear late at night. Oh those late nights ! Your breath touching My skin, My soul. Me dreaming of resting on your chest, listening to the heart belonging to Me, beating within your chest.

Maybe it's most unusual for a Mistress to be missing a slave as I miss you but I truly don't care what people think. By all means let it be known that one cannot be replaced by another and while I'm sure there are plenty of amazing and wonderful truly submissive men out there I don't want any of them. I want you. back. Here with Me.

That's all.