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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Pan Female Dominant, 34,  Topeka, Kansas
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Mishna - photo 1
Mishna - photo 2

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I'm a 5'3" bbw looking to explore. As my grandmother said, great things come in small packages and so does dynamite.

In the lifestyle, I have found that I have responded well to expressing my dominant side. It fulfills a need that I did not realize I had, and creates a great deal of desire to do more, push further and harder. I find myself broadening my own horizons even as I work at broadening those of my partner. It brings out the mother, the sadist, and the lover in me.

There are times when the urge to spank and flog and beat a fine ass is overwhelming. There are times when I want to see a devoted sub, on his knees, sucking my cock and loving it. There are times when I want to be pampered and cared for with tenderness. I have found a wonderful male sub. I am currently looking for a female sub who is willing to assist me in further discovery. I am looking for someone who is interested in more than just casual play, but is not necessarily looking for a permanent partnership.











 Dominant Female



 5' 3"






Actively Seeking:

Submissive Female

Switch Female

 Lives For:

 Shopping (Expert)

 Travel (Expert)



 Coffee Shops

 Fine Dining


 Musical Theater


 You begging

 Blindfolding you

 You worshiping my breasts

 Disciplining you with a cane

 Keeping you permanently locked in tamper evident chastity

 Collaring you

 Disciplining your private parts

 Penetrating your rear

 You massaging me

 Erotic touch (Beginner)

 Hair Pulling

 Sensation Play

 You servicing me with your mouth

 Sensory Play

 Spanking you

 Dominating you with a strap-on


 Science Fiction

 Web Surfing

 Cross Stitch

 Intellectual Discourse

 Show Tunes



 Amusement Parks

 Antique Shows

 Art Galleries

 Flea Markets

 Garage Sales

 Going to the Opera


 Renaissance Faires

 Horseback Riding


 You worshiping my body

 Tying you up

 Feminizing you


 Eye contact with me is not permitted

 Fire Play

 You kissing my feet


 Placing you in masks

 Mental Bondage

 Public Play

 You worshiping me in stockings

 Tickling you while you're bound

 Wax Play (Beginner)


 Board Games


 Comedy Shows

 Historical Shows

 Puzzle Games

 Role Playing Games

 Simulation Games

 Alternative Medicine





 Liberal Politics



 Country Music

 Folk Music


 Rock Music




 Bar Hopping



 Local BDSM Community


 Romance Novels


 TV News




 Curious About:




 Medical fetish play

 Modern Primitivism

 Orgasm Control


 Plastic Wrap Bondage

 Speech Restrictions



 Corner Time

 Electrical Play

 TV Sports







 Horror Movies

 Hard Limits:


 Pony/Puppy Roleplay



 Gourmet Cook

 Professional Chef

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Journal Entries:
12/20/2014 7:33:50 AM
I want to feel soft flesh in my hands, caress it, drag my nails across it, watching the gooseflesh appear, feel a tremble begin. I want to tease a nipple, gently with my fingers at first, then with my warm breath and tongue, and finally, sharply with my teeth. Perhaps this is you.

11/26/2014 12:39:36 PM
Some days, the urge to spank someone is so strong. Pulling them across my lap, feeling the flesh move and warm up under my hand, knowing their juices are starting to flow, watching them squirm in pain and pleasure. Mmmm....

11/23/2014 6:00:04 PM
Let's have a conversation, first. There has to be chemistry, or the domination and submission don't flow. I'm not a pro-domme. I need connection, just like you. 

11/23/2014 1:15:46 PM
Time has only added to my desire to explore a relationship with a woman. I never thought I'd be in this place, but I'm definitely curious.

10/27/2013 7:18:37 PM

You know, over time, I figured I would lose my interest in seeing what it's like to play with a female sub. However, I have not. And no, I haven't been seriously on the hunt. I expect I will find someone when the time and situation are optimal. I'm open. :)

5/27/2012 6:16:50 AM

I'm repeat posting a previous journal entry.



Interested in a female sub. Someone local. Size, height, age--unimportant. Experience level, unimportant. I like newbies as much as I like experienced subs. :)




Be willing to engage in strapon play, pussy and tit torture. Also, masochists preferred. I like to dish out the pain.




I've been a sub, so I know what it's like. :)

5/20/2012 7:55:18 PM

I'm a woman, and while I understand the need for women to be assertive on these sites and not be taken in by the myriad of losers out there, I have to say something. Ladies, if the first thing you put in your profile is basically a bitch session about all the fakes and losers, guess what? No one is going to want to read your profile all the way through, the way you insist they must if they want to get any response from you. Negative attracts negative. Stop being bitches and be nice human beings and you'll find nice human beings in return. I know from experience.

12/25/2011 1:28:36 PM

Interested in a female sub. Someone local. Size, height, age--unimportant. Experience level, unimportant. I like newbies as much as I like experienced subs. :)


Be willing to engage in strapon play, pussy and tit torture. Also, masochists preferred. I like to dish out the pain.


I've been a sub, so I know what it's like. :)

9/25/2011 5:53:35 PM

So, why is it that men automatically assume that Dommes will become subs if they meet the "right" Dom? If you believe that, you can go suck an egg, guys! Or better yet, you can suck my dick! I love being a Domme, and nothing you say or do will change that, you egotistical pricks!


----End of Rant---

8/4/2011 4:29:32 AM

I recently read the profile of a female sub on this website, and saw, yet again, a man who refused to let his sub have dominant friends online. Guys, if you are that insecure, what makes you think you are cut out to dominate someone, anyway? If you have the love and respect of both yourself and your better half, there's nothing for you to fear.


I'm glad I'm a domme and firmly believe that an insecure sub is an unhealthy one. This lifestyle is not for the weak. It is for the strong. Having been a sub, I know what that kind of insecurity is like, and now as a domme, I've felt moments of insecurity. But, if I had to live my life that way, or if my sub lived that way, it would wear us down.


I want to shout, "Grow up!" at these "doms" who feel they have to control someone down to the very people their sub meets and converses with. Get a life! Who has time for that much micromanagement, and why are you lacking trust in your partner? 


--end of rant. :)

6/10/2011 4:28:15 AM

Here pussy, pussy, pussy....

6/5/2011 4:30:22 PM

It's been a while since I've posted anything here. I am definitely looking for a female sub, but only for play. I am not bi, but I'm curious about torturing female parts instead of only male. I think I wouldn't have to beat a female sub as hard to get some satisfying results. Guys wear my arm out, lol.

3/21/2011 4:35:18 PM

I've been considering the possibility of playing with a female sub. I'm curious how the play would be different from a male sub....

2/9/2011 2:26:28 PM

I've uploaded some photos of my darling, sweet sub. We had a lovely weekend, tried a lot of new things. :)

1/9/2011 7:52:45 PM

I had such a wonderful evening with my sweet, sweet pet. he inspires me to grow. Thank you.


I think I hit my drop. It's not the first time it's happened, but the combination of things in my life has made it a bit more unpleasant than usual. I find myself wondering, how do I know I'm not broken? How do I know that part of me that I should be able to freely give to someone else isn't irrevocably in pieces, or encased in cement, untouchable and unreachable? At what point can I put the past in the past, accept what I learned, and give up the painful bits? I try not to hate that part of me, since hate will only keep me attached to it, but why is it still there? How does it still find me? I sit here, in the dark, feeling it wrapped around me, like a sheet of wool, making me separate, distant from my emotions--well, the ones I want, the ones I need. Instead, I find myself closed in here with the things I thought gone, finished, released.


Sometimes, writing about it helps....


Not tonight.

12/13/2010 8:18:13 PM
So, after my checks were stolen in October, my car stolen in November and my computer stolen in December, I have learned a lot of valuable lessons, and found who my friends truly are, and what big hearts people can have, even if there is no immediate benefit to themselves. I have an opportunity to evaluate myself, who I am, how I behave, and how I treat others around me. Not only that, but other doors have opened as well, so, despite my earlier entry which was really written in anger and frustration to the thieves who took my possessions, I want to thank them for teaching me so much, and helping me to actually improve my life by showing me the goodness that surrounds me. I might not have seen it if not for the contrast you provided.

11/22/2010 3:45:55 PM

Thank you, car thieves, for teaching me this lesson in forgiveness, acceptance, and patience. Thank you for teaching me how important time is with my family by denying me access to them during the holidays. Thank you for helping me to overcome my desire to have any money saved at all, by forcing me to spend it to buy another car when you so spitefully wrecked mine. And, finally, thank you for teaching me how to overcome my nature that wishes you had been injured in that wreck, even though I'm certain you weren't.

11/17/2010 4:59:40 PM

Beef stew and pumpkin bread for friends. Wish you were mine? ;)

11/15/2010 4:38:53 AM

After two days (my days off) remodeling the kitchen at work, I want nothing more than to sleep in this morning. *sigh* Unfortunately, our customers need coffee and breakfast--and so do I.

11/14/2010 6:27:24 AM

Good morning, world!! Today is another chance, another opportunity to make myself a better person and have a positive impact on the world. Am I up to the challenge? Anyone else?

11/11/2010 8:25:58 PM

With no one around, I find myself subsisting on diet cola and a variety of crackers....

I eat so much better when I have someone to cook for.

11/8/2010 3:22:46 PM

Here subbie, subbie, subbie..... Here subbie.....

11/3/2010 4:43:47 AM

So cold this morning. I wanted nothing more than to stay under the blankets, cat purring on the pillow next to my head. Where, oh where is my personal heater? ;)

11/1/2010 3:20:41 PM

Back on the hunt for a play partner. Local and in person, only. Don't expect it to happen overnight--I don't work that way. If you are unreliable, don't even consider asking me about what I'm looking for, you have already disqualified yourself.

11/1/2010 6:00:05 AM

If you expect to catch my attention with, "hello", as the only thing in your message, you are sadly mistaken. Take a couple of minutes to show you are genuinely interested or don't bother sending a message in the first place. Talk about using minimal brain cells.

10/31/2010 3:26:41 PM

 Long night, finally getting going for the day, lol. Too bad there's no subbie to make my coffee and get a spanking. ;)

10/30/2010 10:10:31 AM

Looking forward to Monday. I might get to play....a serious ass beating is coming someone's me goosebumps thinking about it.

10/28/2010 8:14:40 PM

Missing my friend, missing my domestic sub, and very much under the weather.  :(  Double shifts tomorrow are not looking fun at all....

10/27/2010 4:40:03 AM

This morning, all I want to do is get back under the blanket and go back to sleep. How much better would it be with a personal heater (read "male sub") under the blanket with me? Hehehehe

10/25/2010 7:11:07 PM

I feel the sadist coming out....She wants to play....

10/24/2010 8:30:00 PM

Sorry if I've been bitchy to anyone when it was unwarranted. It's been a rough couple of weeks and going to stay rough for at least one more. If, however, I've been bitchy to you because you were a jerk, then I'm not particularly sorry. ;)

10/24/2010 2:55:27 PM

I just did a search for female dominants to see what male subs encounter here on CM. Wow. Most of the profiles only had a photo and location information, no substance, and quite a few had fake photos or photos that were not of themselves. While I understand discretion, that seems a bit much. My photos are actually of me, and I've taken the time to put something about myself out there for others to read. What a crappy selection of dommes to choose from. Sorry, guys.

Why in the world would someone respond to an impersonal profile? The same can be said of the men. I don't want to respond to a profile that says nothing about who you are. If you won't take the time to do that, why in the world would you take the time to interact with me properly?

10/22/2010 4:42:38 AM

As I'm facing a day of double shifts, I think how lovely it would be to come home to a clean apartment, dinner, and a sexy sub, perhaps nude, perhaps wearing a maid outfit, perhaps just an apron over his clothes, who would give me the foot massage I know I will desperately need after 14 hours standing in a kitchen, then on to dinner, and a long cuddle as we drift off to sleep. In the morning, we could wake up together and have a little fun as a way to start the day....

It's a wonderful fantasy. :)

10/20/2010 4:52:18 PM

I'm tired today and really wondering why I spend so much effort looking for the right person. If you look, people say you find them when you stop. When you stop looking, people ask how you'll find the right person if you aren't looking. I wonder if finding the right person isn't just a coincidence, if maybe it's really an accident, finding that person with whom you can happily spend your life.

10/20/2010 4:36:05 AM

There needs to be an option where a dominant can say they are looking for, not just a male sub, but a domestic male sub. I just recently lost mine to a job out of state. :(

10/19/2010 1:59:08 PM

Bored and itching to give some spankin's.

10/17/2010 9:12:45 AM

Spending the day thinking about the direction I want my life to go, and working on myself. I haven't done nearly enough of that.

10/13/2010 4:32:38 PM
Very much wanting a cuddly sub these days.

10/11/2010 7:53:18 PM
Sometimes, life hits us when we are down, and sometimes life hitting us puts us down. The best we can do is try to get back up. 

9/29/2010 3:08:19 PM
I'm not interested in playing online. Take a hint when I don't respond to those requests, please. I shouldn't have to repeat myself. 

9/26/2010 12:03:36 PM
Tall men? Yes! Tall, male subs? YES! There's something quite appealing in the idea of a tall man submitting to me, at 5'3".

That's not to say someone only a few inches taller than I am would not be an equally satisfying partner.

Consider height and large, strong hands to be a bit of a fetish.

9/23/2010 9:38:52 PM
Just a heads up: I don't accept chat requests, so don't waste your time or mine with them. Send me a message, and I'll most likely respond. 

9/20/2010 4:57:28 PM
Patience is definitely a virtue....

9/18/2010 5:21:46 PM
I would love to have a sub, collared at my feet. 

9/13/2010 6:48:22 PM
Bored out of my mind tonight!!!

9/12/2010 6:38:31 PM
Wish I had someone to cuddle with, especially while watching a sad movie. :(

9/10/2010 4:27:41 AM
Why is it that all the male subs with the best asses for spanking, are in other states? And conversely, that makes the dommes states away from them as well. It's a cruel, cruel trick of fate, lol.

8/25/2010 8:21:25 PM
Bored tonight. No one to keep me company :(

8/8/2010 5:44:58 PM
My current project: building a homemade male chastity device. So far, I have one temporary device, and a more sturdy, long-term one in the works. I plan on posting photos if they turn out well. 

7/26/2010 7:52:59 PM
Eventually, one needs more out of a relationship; more than just play, more than just fun, more than just friendship. But, it's so difficult to come by that something "more". How do you stay patient and wait until it comes along?

7/5/2010 9:00:22 AM
Another day, another opportunity! :)

6/22/2010 7:23:29 PM
So far, so good. I'm enjoying this dominant frame of mind, I'm enjoying the variety of subs coming out of the wood works, and I'm absolutely loving learning all kinds of new things. 

6/16/2010 3:42:46 PM
This entry is for someone who contacted me on yahoo messenger. I got disconnected and lost the message before I could respond. Please message me again. 

6/15/2010 4:46:55 PM
I am, quite honestly, amazed at how quickly I find myself fitting into a dominant role. Perhaps this is because being dominant in the lifestyle is simply an extension of how I am every day. There is no mindset switch necessary, as there was when I was submissive. It is, instead, one continuous flow from work to home. 

5/30/2010 4:46:01 PM
It's been a long time since I wrote anything here. I was away for a while, but I've come back to do some looking around. Time to work on my inner Domme. :)

11/1/2009 8:10:43 PM
Too tired to sleep. Hate it when that happens. 

10/30/2009 6:39:48 PM
Why is it that males submissives have such great asses?

10/28/2009 4:58:56 PM
I hadn't realized it's been so long since I had added to my journal. Unfortunately, nothing witty comes to mind. 

9/5/2009 9:00:41 PM
I made it to Kansas, all in one piece. A few times I wasn't sure that would be the case, but luckily, it is. :-)

8/24/2009 9:10:06 PM
I've been looking through people's profiles and honestly, would it hurt some of you to crack a SMILE? I don't know too many women who want to approach men who look like they would just as soon hit you (and not in a good way) as say hello to you. There's actually a reason why someone decided to coin the expression, "You get more flies with honey than with vinegar." 

8/24/2009 9:01:54 PM
I appear to have insomnia. I hate it when that happens. No one's awake. The house is quiet, and so's the internet. 

7/28/2009 7:30:29 PM
It seems like everyone who is on CM and in Kansas is either already taken, or looks so unhappy that I wouldn't  dream of contacting them. What gives?

7/21/2009 5:31:05 PM
Looks like I'm moving to the Kansas/Missouri area. Anyone know what the community looks like out there?

6/29/2009 7:55:27 PM
Just to clarify, the hands could belong to dom, sub or switch....

6/27/2009 5:47:04 PM
Any guys with small hands near me?

6/17/2009 5:32:01 PM
Yes, there are fakes around, but come on folks, we are adults and can deal with it without tantrums. If you find a fake, get over it and move on. Taking it personally is a bit immature and ridiculous in my mind. Does the whole community really need to know you've found nothing but fakes or are fed up with fakes? In my limited experience, you get what you actually ask for, and that is often quite different from what you think you asked for. 

6/17/2009 4:35:01 PM
Have you ever had a dream so real that you woke up genuinely experiencing whatever emotions were in that dream? It happened to me last night. It's a bit disconcerting to wake up crying....

5/25/2009 4:02:01 PM
It's been a while since I put anything in my journal. Things are changing, the summer is coming, and it's time for real world life to start....almost. :) 

5/16/2009 12:41:56 PM
Such a lovely weekend. :)

5/13/2009 4:00:38 PM
Patience is one of those elusive things you wish you had more of, but know that having more of means you will use it more frequently than you already have to.  

5/12/2009 11:07:18 AM
Thank goodness for daytime cold medicine :)

5/8/2009 5:35:13 PM
It was a great day for baking. I really caught the bug. I made rolls, a chocolate cake and some wonderful strawberry cupcakes. Some lucky man gets to have all that and more....he sure is taking his time....

5/7/2009 7:25:01 PM
The craving to play has been pretty strong lately. I wonder how others deal with that when there's no one to play with. 

5/6/2009 12:53:58 PM
Ever have one of those days where you just know a spanking would make it perfect?

5/4/2009 4:07:38 PM
Whoo!!! Rain!!

5/3/2009 4:56:13 AM
<sigh> I miss the cool weather, but love the rain. If it rained all the time, then it might be cooler.....I'll have to talk to the weatherman....

4/30/2009 1:40:59 PM
I'm no longer a quarter of a century old....I'm older. When I turned 25 last year, I didn't feel much older, but this year, for some reason, I do. 

4/29/2009 2:49:28 PM
It's Indian food night. Yum!

4/27/2009 12:28:19 PM
I got some fun things in the I just need to find someone to help me use them. :D

4/25/2009 4:09:49 PM
Spring cleaning is done!!! YAY!!!!

4/24/2009 5:17:02 AM
Another beautiful day outside :)

4/22/2009 12:07:24 PM
It is such a beautiful day! Who could look outside and not be happy? 

4/22/2009 2:51:25 AM
Last day of one class....looking forward to it. I'm almost finished with school, again, and that is an exciting thought. 

4/13/2009 10:47:10 AM
Thanks to everyone who sent me email. Made me smile. :)

4/9/2009 4:19:10 PM
My inbox has been so empty lately....  :(

4/8/2009 1:48:37 PM
It's been a long week already and it's only Wednesday. Definitely looking forward to the weekend. :) 

4/5/2009 6:56:28 PM
I hear it's supposed to get cool again....I can't wait! I love the cold much more than I like the heat. If it's cold, you can always add more layers, but if it's hot, there's only so much you can take off until you are standing there in your birthday suit and still hot. 

4/4/2009 1:52:54 PM
I often wonder about misinterpretation and how to keep someone from misinterpreting things. I think I'm being clear about something, but it turns out the other person got a completely different meaning from what I said.

4/1/2009 8:52:52 PM
I'm not usually up this late, but it's nice for a change. 

3/29/2009 11:48:03 AM
Anyone up for a picnic?

3/27/2009 11:22:57 AM
Spring rain is wonderful. I'd love to go sit outside somewhere under a tree in the rain, listen to it hitting the leaves and feel its warmth on my face. 

3/23/2009 12:11:00 PM
Another amazingly beautiful day. I hope everyone else is enjoying it as much as I am. :)

3/22/2009 8:41:11 AM
How awesome would a picnic be today? Blue sky, slight breeze, red juicy strawberries.....

3/19/2009 4:57:59 PM
What to do with my weekend....

3/19/2009 3:07:14 PM
Today could have gone either way on the "good" scale, but all it took was a package from a friend to make it an absolutely wonderful day. :)

3/18/2009 3:37:18 PM
How much would I love for this week of school to be over? And it's only just Wednesday. I should definitely go back on coffee....

3/16/2009 12:44:16 PM
I love the rain, but would a little sun now and again hurt anything?

3/14/2009 4:07:04 AM
Things always come down to the big questions in life, like, what should I make for breakfast? 

3/12/2009 2:09:52 PM
On my way home today, I took the opportunity to look at the trees in bloom. Yes, I was very much girly, thinking how beautiful they are, and how much I love spring.

3/11/2009 12:55:52 PM
I've had better days, but every day you learn something about yourself could be considered a good day, even if you don't like what you learned.

3/9/2009 3:02:33 PM
Nothing like a nice nap. :)

3/8/2009 7:45:16 AM
One day, it's freezing; the next, it's like an oven. I guess Spring really is here....

3/7/2009 6:52:26 PM
Just hanging out on a Saturday night. It's nice sometimes to be alone.

3/6/2009 4:20:46 PM
I sometime wonder what it would be like to be lacking in common sense.....then I realize, I don't have to wonder; all I have to do is walk down the street and do a little observing. I'll see someone soon enough...too bad they won't be wearing their sign....

3/5/2009 2:56:48 PM
Ever been alone with yourself and wonder who you are?

3/5/2009 11:12:19 AM
Spring break goes by waaaaayyyyy too fast! 

3/3/2009 6:10:20 AM
Mmmmm.....chocolate cake and strawberries.....for breakfast. :)  What could be better?

3/2/2009 6:45:13 PM
<sigh> All the snow has melted. :(

3/2/2009 12:08:02 PM
Anyone feel like being a distraction with their witty conversation?

3/2/2009 10:42:56 AM
Such a slow's nice not to have to rush to do anything. 

3/2/2009 4:25:54 AM
The snow is so beautiful!!!!

2/28/2009 11:21:30 AM
What a lovely, rainy Saturday.  :)

2/28/2009 2:46:03 AM
Well, I had two men respond to my poll about being intimidated by open and honest women. One answered honestly, the other thought I meant something else and ended up responding that women should not be heard, that silence is golden. So much for that, lol.

2/27/2009 6:50:03 PM
Maybe I'm too honest. Maybe I should learn to lie and use deceit...

2/27/2009 4:02:42 PM
You're going along fine, happy with the world, then all of a sudden, wham! You see something that reminds you of your recent ex and it stabs you in the heart. 

2/26/2009 9:56:21 PM
Ok, gentlemen, time for a poll....all those who are intimidated by women who are completely open and honest, raise your hands....Be honest, now. 

2/26/2009 5:54:58 PM
I have come to the conclusion that I spend way too much time on this site, lol. I just have a lot of fun reading other people's profiles. :)

2/26/2009 12:45:09 PM
Spring break is here!!!! I'm so ready for a break. 

2/25/2009 2:56:26 AM
Losar tashi delek!! or Happy New Year!!!! (in Tibetan, of course.)  

2/24/2009 3:25:34 PM
Ever have one of those days where you have a bazillion things to do, but you swear your brain is wrapped in cotton and you can't seem to get anything done? Grrrr......I seriously dislike those.

2/23/2009 4:27:57 PM
Nothing exciting today....

2/22/2009 4:31:03 PM
Ever just want to find someone cool to hang out with?

2/17/2009 6:08:43 PM
I have to say that I've been pleasantly surprised with the people I've been communicating with here. Thanks, folks for being so nice!  :)

2/15/2009 3:13:58 PM
I love getting emails......

2/15/2009 2:18:10 PM
I'd love to have more fun, but you know how there never seems to be enough hours in the day? 

2/13/2009 4:51:20 AM
I feel like baking today. Maybe some chocolate muffins....

2/12/2009 4:02:36 PM
I like getting emails as much as the next person, but isn't it more fun if they have complete and interesting sentences in them? I certainly think so. :)

2/8/2009 5:05:30 AM
Being a sub or slave does not automatically equal being a door mat, and questions tend to equal intelligence.

1/17/2009 12:37:38 PM
I think it's interesting that because a person's profile says "submissive" that gives them the automatic right to start issuing orders and acting like they own a person. A little hint for those who do that--it's not welcome. Submission, mine anyway, is earned. Thanks for reading this PSA.

12/14/2008 3:40:48 AM
It's amazing how many people are looking to find a lasting, deep and meaningful relationship based solely on looks. Come on, folks! How solid can a relationship be that is built on something as impermanent as external beauty? 

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