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Pan Female Switch, 26,  Keizer, Oregon
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Mallory4Micky

Mallory4Micky - photo 1
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Mallory4Micky - photo 9
Mallory4Micky - photo 10
Mallory4Micky - photo 11
Mallory4Micky - photo 12
Mallory4Micky - photo 13

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Friends:
irishguyjimmyYasiHellsutekh88

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I feel there is a need to re-vamp this, as apparently I am not being clear. I have also recently realized that what I am looking for has altered. I am very into the darker reaches of this lifestyle, and my personal kinks. Blood, violence in general, but this is something I assure you that you do not have to have an interest in as deeply as I do, for I can satisfy this need on my own. I have come to realize that I am in need of a more submissive guy, preferably a switch, but not going to shy away from a submissive male who is more agressive outside the bedroom, in his everyday life. I do enjoy women, but am not interested in a realationship with one, as I have done this and was left unsatisfied, plus most girls are clingy and full-o-drama. Thats something I just simply do not want in my life, that goes for males as well. I do enjoy a dominate guy, but this will be short term play unless he is willing to let me have a little puppy boy of my own to keep. I do NOT want a daddy, and as I see it, if you could mathmatically be my father, step along, I am not interested in anything more than friendship. Sorry, Im mearly honest. I am NOT slave material, although I wouldn't say no to sharing one :) My name here says alot, if you understand its meaning, we may just get along. I am very open, honest, and expect the same from others. I believe in the golden rule. If you read this far, kudoes. I really enjoy questions, so anything you'd like to throw out there, the worst thing that'll happen is I'll throw it back.

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Joined:

 Mallory4Micky

 Female Switch

 Keizer 

 Oregon

 6' 0"

 190 lbs

 26

 Pan

 Caucasian

 09/27/09

 

Actively Seeking:

Dominant male

Sub / Slave Male

Switch Women

Switch Male

 Lives For:

 Hair Pulling

 Sensation Play

 Horror Movies

 Body Art

 Tattoos

 Writing

 Punk Rock Music

 Loves:

 Camping

 Eye contact with me is not permitted

 Modern Primitivism

 Total control of your orgasms

 Rituals

 Speech Restrictions

 You worshiping me in stockings

 Suspension Bondage

 Comedy Shows

 Sewing

 Nineties Music

 Oldies

 Likes:

 Polyamory

 Hates:

 Gambling

 Diapers

 Fire Play

 EMO Music

 Hip Hop Music

 Hard Limits:

 Mental Bondage

 Sensory Play

 Watersports

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Journal Entries:
4/6/2011 10:10:47 PM
As things pan out, I will not be moving back south, I am not too thrilled about the decision, but I cannot fix something that chooses to be broken. That being said, looks like Oregon is stuck with me for now.

11/30/2010 10:15:07 PM
I'LL BE IN OREGON FOR A FEW MORE MONTHS, THEN I'LL BE MOVING BACK TO TEXAS. WOULDN'T MIND MAKING FRIENDS DOWN THERE. I KNOW PEOPLE HERE IN OREGON, YET NO ONE WHERE I'LL BE GOING. IF YOU'RE IN TEXAS, AND NOT A TOTAL DOUCH HIT ME UP. 

10/5/2009 12:56:56 PM
Murder song Slow hard vibes, they dance around, He slams you body to the ground. Spinning circles dance about, His cold slim scalpel lets blood out. You scream, his hand covers your mouth, Chest, to stomach, his blade heads south. Hands like ice, your throat they grip, You prey to God his blade wont slip. He answeres your unspoken prayer, God isn?t here, he doesn?t care. Small slow tears fall down your face, The grin he wears, so out of place. Fear engulfs your beating heart, All thoughts of hope are ripped apart. You feel his blade, it goes too deep, Up from your skin blood starts to seep. You look at him, he see?s your fear, He smiles and says, ?I love you dear.? Your crying now, shaking, scared, Momentary eye contact, briefly shared, You almost think he?ll let you go, Till the force he?s using starts to grow. You try to breath, the world turns black, You feel death breathing down your back. Ready sweets? You hear him say, Your precious life, it slips away. He gets up, looks down on you. FUCK! He says?look what you made me do... -end 2007

10/5/2009 12:56:23 PM
Unexpected slave girl The man, he sits watching his prey, He feels inside, today?s the day, Observing her, the way she walks, Her every move, with whom she talks. He studies the daily life she lives, Living off the power watching gives. She has no clue, what lies ahead, Not one suspicion, in her pretty little head. She parks her car, and goes inside, His breathing gets heavy, he continues to hide. Watching her, get a bite to eat, Removing her shoes, from her tired feet. He?s closer now, but quiet still. Peering in just below her window sill. Somewhere inside her telephone rings, To hear her speak, the lust it brings, He hears her laugh, and say goodnight. He hesitates, to get the timing right. As the light from the TV appears, Anticipation of the moment nears, Her doorbell rings, she walks to the door. Nothing but a single rose lying on the floor. She steps outside, no ones around, She bends down to pick up the rose off the ground. When she comes to, she is gagged and bound, there are hooks in her back, she cannot feel the ground. As she opens her eyes, she see?s the man, He is handsome, strong, her number one fan. ?hello sweets? she hears him say, His voice sounds really far away. She blacks out again, fear takes her under. Se wakes to a snap on her back like thunder. He whips her again, drawing blood, she screams, But the hurt brings a feeling she?s dreamt of in dreams. CRACK to the back, this time she moans, Ecstasy shakes straight through to her bones. A small slow tear, streams down her face, The hooks in her back feel right in their place. ?Who are you? she asks the man, ?Who else, my lady, I?m your number one fan.? ?Am I going to die? Asks a small sexy voice, ?If you want to doll, it?s completely your choice. Refuse me, and yes, I?ll take your life, Be a good little girl, I?ll make you my wife.? The girl is confused, but turned on by the fear. ?I?ll do as you ask, if you just keep me here.? -end. 2007

10/5/2009 12:54:37 PM
The Jones I sit here and stare at you blank collage rule, Reminiscing about how you once were my tool. The power once felt from this pen in my hand, The talent I lost when I froze the demand, From the beast I once waltzed with, who steadied my pen, Open doors in my brain, letting words fill them in. I could flow with a passion I could not control, The ink and you paper, romantically stroll. I miss loosing grip on the words that I write, Making love between margins, in sink with the fight, Which my brain cannot win, perfect sentences do, The letters together, form fraises so true, I lust after loosing control of my thoughts, Reminiscing of you, and those tiny black dots. The power I felt, from the demon inside, Being honest with things in which most people hide, Reading writing I know that I wrote with my hand, Explaining the things that I don?t understand. Recognizing my penmanship, written blacked out, Knowing I wrote it, but still having doubt, I could do it without the monster I once fed, Now I?m lying here nightly, tortured in my head. Wishing my evil friend here by my side, To help me to write down the words that I hide. Why do I need you, to focus my knack? This monkey gets heavy perched up on my back. I know I have talent that?s going to waste, This pen?s getting lonely, all I want is a taste, Of the way that I felt with you mistress of mine, From the comfort that comes from a well written rhyme. Flowing effortlessly, telling truth that cuts deep, Stating statements that swallow your soul, and they keep Speaking words that I know are pure fact, yet they hurt, Grasp a grip on my throat, shove my face in the dirt. It has always been you, and the lines that you own, That have kept me from cutting straight down to the bone, Just to silence the sentences stuck in my brain, Where they echo inside, till they drive me insane, Haunting somewhere within me, just might loose control, Make you waltz with my thoughts, taking you on a stroll. Till you wonder just where all reality went, Your control over self control slightly gets bent. Feeling my swift pen press against your faint blue lines, Create painful emotions, as they light flashing signs, Stating loudly and bluntly words that hurt you to hold, Written by shaking hands, speaking blatant and bold. I have never once promised I?d be gentle, or kind I?ve been honest with words that have driven you blind. The pain I?ve inflicted, just one side effect Stated clearly in warnings, you gave no respect. You are just one more paper, which I wrote upon In a desperate obsession, to find out what?s wrong. In this world my own mind keeps hidden from me, Where my beast is confined, begging just to be free. I can?t dance with the danger, I need badly write, The instructions explaining the tactics to fight, This battle that rages, the hate in my soul, The deep seated fear, that I might loose control, Over things living in me, that I cannot see, Yet I know enough of them to want them to be, Written down, read out loud, and taken to heart. The shame it inflicts is just one tiny part, Of the goal that these words that I store on your skin, The intentions they have make reflection begin, I look deep inside me, a place drowning in shame, With this selfish obsession for taking the blame, For recording these statements upon pages bare, Forcing innocent paper to take part, and to share, These insane conclusions I have been forced to reach After so many years lost refusing to teach, The world of the shield I?ve been living behind, Playing stupid and hiding the truth in my mind. I am nothing with out the beast I?ve tried so hard to kill, It is he, who has power over me and the will, To share with you, my dear mistress, to jot in your lines, Pointless words that explain definition of signs I see finally I?ve been blocking out for so long, That explain in full detail exactly what?s wrong. In this world I hide hidden from my only friend, I?ve abandoned in fear of reaching the end. For I?m scared that conclusion will bring upon shame, I hear deep in my mind the beast calling my name. Saying softly, so quietly, call upon me, Admit that you need me to set the ink free. Those emotions and feelings that keep you distressed, Will only get bigger, the more they?re repressed. I can help you, he tells me, his voice whispered low, Without me you cannot un-cramp the flow, You banished me here, in hopes I would be lost In the maze of your mind, not considering cost. I act as if I cannot hear that he spoke, It?s just voices inside my head playing some joke A tasteless endeavor the ink has provoked, Somehow feelings I thought finally died, gently stroked Causing tingles, sensations I cannot deny Start to surface, I?m trying so hard not to cry You can feel that my grip on this pen starts to shake How careful I am, every move that I make. The deliberate way I am increasing the flow, Desperately I deny answers I know Breathing hard on my neck, comes the deep seated lust, To call out my beast, is becoming a must. Letters, forming words, that my fingers can?t stop, From creating this sad simple paper I jot, It somehow has come back to life once again, The sensual dance between paper and pen. Realization starts to slowly sink in, I?m distracting myself from the beast creeping in, I tried not to notice when the he left my mind, Once again he?s alive, creeping up from behind. I act as if I do not notice him there, The fear multiplies, I pretend not to care. Confrontation at this point I cannot avoid I am face to face with what I thought I destroyed. It is time now, regretfully I now admit, For facing the fact that I finally get, Without you I am simply one more sad scared soul, Since abandoning you, I?ve abandoned control, Over words that might hold the key to set free, This creature, this beast who is living in me. I break down, I fall, my knees hit the ground. From near by I hear this sickening sound. I look up, I see looking down on me, the fear, He holds out his hand, as he beckons me near. I get up off my knees, and give in to his lead, He promises me that he has what I need. As we walk, we approach a small table, a chair, As he sits me down, suddenly I am aware, Of this paper that sits face down on the desk, With a pen placed beside it, I feel like it?s a test. I am cautious, as he instructs me to write, I realize slowly I?ve just lost the fight. The pen starts to move, forming handwriting, mine, Beyond my control, filling line after line, My fingers, they hurt, I try and slow down, The ink starts to smear, paper bloody and brown. I have lost all control, aware of this now, I look to my words, hoping they?ll tell my how. Reading what I have written, I?m starting to shake, The fear is recorded, on pages once blank. The words I have written, are insane, don?t make sense. The emotion however, extremely intense. The fear I?ve projected upon you, sweet page, Is so unnecessary, yet so full of rage. I crumple you paper, before I read through, With my face in my hands, knowing my beast spoke true. I cannot control this fire inside, No matter how well I thought I could hide. My demon still found me, and brought me to you, Put this pen in my hand, said I?d know what to do. I think I now know what his plans were for me. For in me I hold answers, I can?t set free. It?s the ink, and your black college rule where I dwell. Releases the craving that?s starting to swell, Sitting high on my perch, looking down on the fear, The conclusion is reached, such delusion I hear. I set down this pen, feeling tired, confused. You sitting in front of me, wrinkled and used. I read to myself pointless words, and I cry. So much ink that I shed, still the question is why. Its beginning to focus so crystally clear, My purpose in life is to document fear I realize now what I?m put here to do, I?m living the life, in which gives life to you. -end 2007

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