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Taking a break - will check here once a week and reply to friends only, unless your message is fascinating in some way - LOL. Here is my old profile (unaltered as yet): I am married with grown up children and have no intention or wish to change that aspect of my life, so, if that is a hard limit, read no further. I didn't discover bdsm until I was introduced to it by a nurse when I was in my early 30's, while my wife and I were having a temporary 'break' (long story). In bdsm I finally discovered that "something" that had been missing from my life generally, and from vanilla sex, and having found it, I intend to keep enjoying it and remain happy and fulfilled for my own sake, as well as for my family's and friend's sakes - a happy man is so much more fun to be aorund than a frustrated one! A sub once described the lifestyle as "The fire that is BDSM", and that is how I feel about it - it is intense and irresistible! ... you cannot ignore it for long. The way I look at it is that no one expects a vanilla wife to fulfill 100% of a husband's needs (or visa versa) - that is why he is allowed to have golfing mates, fishing buddies, a yachting crew, and so on. He should not have a vanilla girlfriend, as that competes directly in an area where the wife has exclusive rights. But, I cannot see why he cannot have one or more bdsm friends, not for vanilla sex, but to satisfy a need in which the wife has no interest. I have both professional and trade qualifications and have enjoyed an unbelievably diverse and interesting life, and enjoy talking with anyone about anything. A long time ago I when was a young university student and athlete I found I was lucky with the opposite sex. At first, it was all new and exciting, the warm fuzzies of courting, that amazing loss of virginity, and those early sexual thrills and experiences, but even then, there was something missing, something more to be had out of a relationship. I was determined to find out what that "je n'est ce quoi" was, and became an ardent student of sex generally, and the female sexual response, in particular, reading, practising, asking my partners what they liked and disliked, and became an excellent sex technician, but there was still something missing! "Maybe I am Gay", I thought, but I tried it and found I am definitley not Gay - LOL. When Judy introduced me to BDSM, I suddenly knew I had found the missing link to my physical and emotional fulfilment. My sub of 5 years had to move interstate a while ago and I would like to meet someone, one day, no rush, who can accept all of the above, who enjoys intelligent conversation, and who would be interested in friendship first, with an intelligent, caring, firm but fair, professional, gentleman, and a part-time D/s relationship later, if we mutually desire it. Looks, age, and all the usual boy-girl things are not as important to me as mutual interests, an attraction of the minds, and your desire to ultimately submit. I am also a writer and would like to just chat with Lifestyle people, male and female, of all ages and kinks. I have been involved for many years, but I was in my early 30's when Judy first asked me to spank her, so I don't know what it is like to be an 18 or 25 year old newbie. We all have our own preferences in the world of bdsm. We know about the other kinks, but do we really know what they feel like if we do not practise them ourselves? So, if you have a particular interest, or what you think might be a less common kink, don't be shy, please share it, and I will store the information away until I get around to writing my bdsm novel (no names or pack drill, of course - LOL) If you are female, particularly a young one, please don't feel that if you do contact me with a view to chatting about any of the above matters, that you might risk being pestered by an older man. I like chatting; I like sharing information; I like learning about other people's likes, dislikes, attitudes, kinks, and thoughts on all manner of things; but I am not actively looking and definitely not interested in pursuing someone who is not interested in me - so please feel relaxed and free to contact me and when you don't want to write any more, we will just stop - OK?