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Hello everyone.
Just to be up front, I'm not looking for anyone. I do browse a few profiles that catch my eye, and have managed to read every mail so far, but I'm really not looking. Just curious.
I'm here to journal someplace private where nobody I know will find it. In other words, not on my laptop!
Last spring I was pretty inexperienced, but I've been in a couple of relationships (read my journal) and discovered a lot. A lot about sex and a lot about myself.
Read my journal to get to know me. Start from the beginning if you have the time. Everything there is to know is in there.
Thanks for the kind words to those that have sent them.
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So after a long summer of pointless dates and outdoor masturbation, I think I've managed to find somebody.
I think.
I'm really not sure exactly, but there are a lot of good signs.
I've met a guy, or maybe I should say a man. He's over twice my age, kind of like J was last year. This guy seems to be different because he's really into younger girls. He wants me to call him "Daddy", which I'm not completely into, but I'm more than happy to do. Honestly, the strange part is that it does nothing for me. Usually when I hear about any kind of kink or turn on, I immediately find it exciting and want to try it. The whole "daddy" think does nothing for me.
Oh well.
Anyway, Daddy is pretty hot and totally gets my juices flowing. He definitely makes me hot... no doubt about it. And the end of the first date we were back at his house (yes, he owns a house) where I ended up topless. Yeah, I say I'm a total slut, but not always a first date slut. I went on a whole lot of first dates this year where I didn't end up even kissing, let alone half-naked, so this really was a big event.
He sat on the couch, while I knelt on the floor with my head up against his leg. He just stuck our his fingers and played with my face and mouth with was so. very. sexy. I felt like a toy, or maybe a pet, which was such a huge turn on. And the whole time I was thinking, what if he wants more? Will I do it? Oh yeah, I'll do it. I'll do anything.
No point in lying.
We talked about some of his fantasies, while I told him a little of my history with J and S. He likes having a little girl to dress up like a slut and take out, which I'm more than willing to do. He also wants to invite some guy friends over, and have me serve them drinks more or less naked (he mentioned garters and hose, heels and nothing else). Then they get to use me all night ... my mouth and my tits ... and cum all over me while he watches. My ass and pussy, he explained, would be his.
The idea of having my ass and pussy shared does excite me ... but the idea of having my ass and pussy *owned*... wow. I can't explain that but something about it ... damn... gets me wet and weak in the knees just thinking about it.
On our second date I dressed up total slut... a nice short skirt no panties, and a tight white top no bra. We had dinner and went to a movie. As soon as the lights went dark his hand was up my skirt and fiddling away. I was in heaven. It's been half a year since anyone touched me down there, and this guy is good. I came. he didn't stop. I came again. he kept going. I had to beg to suck his cock. And by "had to" I mean wanted it so god damned much.
I bent over and started sucking him off right there in the theater. He pulled my hair and held me strong... not rough, but strong. He was in charge, no doubt about it. His cock felt amazing in my mouth. Like it belonged there. Like my mouth was put on this earth just to suck his cock. That was my whole purpose in life. To suck THAT cock.
He pulled out of me and shot a load right into my face. I closed my mouth ... I just wanted it on me. I was supposed to wear every last drop. Don't ask me how I knew. Wear it, don't clean it.
I smiled up at him, and felt so satisfied. Like I had done what I was supposed to do. I was a good girl.
So tomorrow we make it official... whatever that means. It's our third date. I will call him daddy, and wash his car for him naked. He promises that I'll get fucked. And I can't wait.
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So i've been feeling horny for about a month. After my breakup with S I though I would never feel horny again and since I gained weight I certainly don't feel sexy. But sometime in June or so the sun came out, school let out, and I started to feel that familiar feeling - the need for sex.
So sometime in June I started masturbating again. But I couldn't convince myself to do anything wild or crazy or kinky. I would just fantasize about S ... things we did. Things I wish we'd done. It was all about her.
On the one hand I feel kind of lame fantasizing about an ex, but on the other hand I feel kind of lame thinking about trying to recreate some of the good times I've had solo. I know I can have nasty, kinky times by myself though but it just felt so awkward without S involved.
So for weeks I've been saying to myself that I have to get out and do something solo - just to break out of the longing for S rut. I can't live in the past. I need to force myself to take an adventure.
So my adventure started today. I dressed up in a large t-shirt and a pair of sandals... nothing else. No bra, no panties, no shorts. The t-shirt was long enough to cover everything, but I think it was clear that nothing else was under there.
I didn't have a plan. I just walked around town a bit hoping for inspiration. If nothing else, I thought, maybe I'd get some stares that would make me horny.
I kept walking and felt OK. Not super horny, but turned on enough. I kept trying to think of something crazy and wild I could do to get back to my normal level of kink. I must have walked around for an hour when inspiration struck in the craziest of places.
I went into a WaWa for a drink and suddenly saw them... hot dogs. Seriously... for all the jokes in the world about hot dogs I never really tried them before, and couldn't think of them until I saw them. Suddenly I knew what I needed to do and got that amazing feeling again ... that feeling when you know some crazy kinky thing is about to happen and you know you're doing to do it, while at the same time not believing it's about to happen.
Yeah, I was about to fuck a hot dog and I felt good about it. The smile on my face must have been a mile wide.
And for some reason one hot dog just didn't seem enough, so I bought a pack of 8 uncooked ones.
I walked around the streets, almost naked, carrying around a pack of hotdogs that I knew I was going to fuck. I had that big insane grin on my face that I knew told everyone I was up to something. And I was damn sure that everyone who looked at me looked at that package of hotdogs and was thinking to themselves "yeah, that slut's going to fuck some hotdogs."
I was in heaven. I hadn't felt that horny or that good about myself in months.
I walked across town, back by my apartment, and over into the other side of town where the rich folks live. There's also some wooded areas over there. Having to wait to carry out my plan was just making me more horny with each step. I'd only gotten a few feet into the woods when I couldn't take it anymore... off came the t-shirt. I threw it on the ground at sat on it, facing the road. I could see the cars going by ... not many, but I could still see them. Maybe they saw me, maybe they didn't.
I opened the package of hotdogs, which was actually kind of funny because I had a hard time pulling them open. Once I got them open I took a few out and just started to play... sliding them in and out of my mouth like cocks... rubbing them on my pussy... sliding them in and out of my pussy ... then tasting the juice ... rubbing them on my tits ... taking two... sucking them like two cocks ... rubbing them on my nipples like two cocks... enjoying myself.
Honestly, it was all very silly. I was pretty much laughing the whole time. I don't remember ever laughing so hard while playing with myself before ...
But I eventually got down to business ... stuffing my pussy with the hotdogs. They were small, and flimsy, and fragile... and really didn't make the best toys. Seriously, I don't recommend it. They kept breaking.
Eventually though, I got myself going good... one in my ass, two in my pussy, broken hotdog parts everywhere. Holding the stubby remains of another I rubbed it fiercely against my clit until I came.
And then I sat there laughing... naked on the ground ... cars passing by but somehow not seeing me. I laid down in the forest and just lightly began touching myself.... loving myself. Not just getting myself off, but very gentling loving myself.... I worked myself over until I came again.
And then I just rested, watching the cars go by for awhile.
Then I got up, put my shirt back on, and came home.
I think the SlutGoddes might be back.
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So here is the story...
It's been over sixth months since my last entry because shortly after new years S and I broke up. I should say she broke up with me. I was totally blindsided. Had no idea it was coming. Just one day she texts me and is like "it's been fun, but I'm looking for guys now, thanks". No, that's not what she said, but you know what I mean.
I was devastated. I cried for about 3 months. My sex drive dropped to zero. I gained weight. I stopped crying and just felt miserable for awhile after that.
I tried dating some guys, but they were all boring. No, it wasn't that all I want is women. I love guys. I love cock. But I love kink. These guys were BORING. Really, I need psychos.
It wasn't until June that my sex drive recovered. I few weeks ago I started masturbating again, and having fantasies. When they opened the poor, I really wanted to jump in naked. I used to seriously sit and think how I could do it, and what might happen if I did. If I didn't live with my mother, I think I would just try it.
But I have no real sex life. I'm not sure if I should have a sex life because all my fantasies involve S. No, make that all my fantasies are memories. I don't actually have any new fantasies, I just think about what happened in the past and get off to that. It works, but it worries me. I'm sure that means I'm not really over S and I should be in a relationship. On the other hand, I'm ready for a good fuck.
Plain and simple, I don't know how to fuck if I don't have a relationship. I know it sounds stupid, especially considering the stuff I've done in the past. I mean I have fucked complete strangers... while blindfolded... not knowing their names or seeing their faces. But at the same time, S was there the whole time, watching, directing... yes I did it for me, and it was great. But I also did it for her. So yeah, other people were there... but it was part of OUR sex life.
So I'm stumped... I just don't know what to do. I want some sex, but I don't think I'm ready.
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I am stuck home on Saturday night. I wish I were out with S, but that's just not going to happen ...
It's been a long and wild week. I will try to hit the highlights.
S is home for the holidays, which makes me so happy I cannot describe it. Everything in the world is wonderful and nothing can change that. I am her pet. I am totally in love with her. She owns me because she owns my heart. I had no idea that love was like this and no idea I could feel it for another girl.
We didn't have much time to spend alone at first, but mom had to work all week. That gave us our days to ourselves in my apartment. That gave me four days to answer the apartment door naked and greet S with a smile. It gave us 4 days to be filthy horny girls.
We spent all morning monday making wild love on my bed. We'd both been denied each other's touch for so long all we wanted to do was fuck. After lunch S changed things up a bit.
I'm not sure what brought this on, but S seemed to want to inflict as much pain as humanly possible on my nipples. She improvised clamps and pulled them and stretched them and squeezed them and OMG just plain tortured them. She told me she wanted to see just how much pain I could take, and then push me past it. And that's just what she did. I moaned and groaned and screamed and cried, but never once asked her to stop. Part of it was pride. I didn't want to admit that there was anything I couldn't take or anything I wouldn't do for her. And part of it was just me wanting to endure it all for her pleasure. As long as she wanted to do it, I wanted to let her.
And the end my nipples were horrendously sore, long after she stopped. The stayed stuff and errect for the rest of the night. A good ten hours after she stopped. We went out to dinner and then to the mall after, and of course I didn't wear a bra. I was incredibly aware of my nipples the whole time. It felt like they were bigger than life, sticking out 6 feet in front of me ... and there were stares. All those stares like they knew how they got that way.
When I got up tuesday my nipples were still sore, but no longer freakishly hard and sensitive. The feeling was a reminder of the day before, but not strong enough to distract me from today.
On tuesday S gave me my christmas presents. The first, much to my shock and surprise, was a butt plug. I felt so incredibly sexy and dirty and adult, but at the same time terrified that my mom will someday find it. Ok, I'm still terrified, but I'll deal.
The butt plug quickly found its way into my ass and S gave me my second present - a very nice, pink, lacey panty. Not a thong, more like a pair of tiny tight shorts.
The panty went on over the butt plug.
And the S had me get dressed. I was honestly a little nervous about what was going to come next. I KNEW I was going to have to go out in public with my butt plug, but I had no idea how I would handle it. It scared me, but it also excited me like crazy. I was pretty fired up while getting dressed. I need to calm down in the car...
My outfit: shoes, tight jeans, t-shirt jacket... plus the panties and the butt plug.
We went to the mall and walked around awhile. At first I thought we were just going to walk around until I couldn't take it anymore, but S had other plans. Meanwhile I was very aware of the plug the whole time. I felt like I was walking funny, but I also felt incredibly dirty and horny. Yeah, I was the only girl walking around teh mall with a butt plug in her ass, and that made me the dirtiest filthiest slutwhore there.
And then we went dress shoping....
We went to the nice, expensive store... a place I wouldn't dream of shopping, but S doesn't bat an eyelash at. S picked a dress for me to try on. I went into the changing room, changed, and came out with it on. The act of changing ... the bending to take off my pants especially ... made me very aware of the plug. I felt it moving around inside me. Sometimes it felt good ... too good. Sometimes it felt uncomforable. S made me pose. Turn around. We talked about the dress. She asked the counter person for her opinion. Then S gave me another dress.
Change and repeat.
And repeat.
And repeat.
And a fifth dress. No try the second one again. Maybe the first. I was about to scream. Maybe cry. I was in agony and exstacy and god only knows what. I thought i was going to explode.
S picked a dress and said it was time to go. I went back into the changing room. Putting my pants on was not easy. I wanted to rest. I wanted to cum. I wanted to pull that thing out of my butt because it was just too much. I couldn't sit down though. I stood the changing room, naked except for my plug and panty, taking deep breaths and trying to calm down. I don't know how long I was in there. it felt like hours. I finally came out and S was ready to go.
She asked me if I made myself cum while I was in there. I told her no because she hadn't told me to. She called me a good girl and a practically melted. I was determined to see this though to the end, no matter what she demanded, but I was so fired up that my hands were shaking.
Shoe shoping was next. I was so excited I can barely remember it. Sitting down, trying on shoes, getting up, walking, turning, walking, sitting down, next pair please. I was on such a high that I was practically hallucinating. Seriously, I couldn't see straight.
Shoe shopping ended and then it was lunch. S sat down at a table and gave me directions... a sandwhich from one place, a salad from another. Smoothies from a third place. Get us fries from a fourth. And get them in that order. Chop chop!
I was dizzy. My hands were shaking so bad I could barely hold the tray. Hell, I fucking COULDN'T hold the tray in one hand, it shook so much. I had to grip it tight with both hands. I pracitcally collapsed into the booth at the food court. I didn't know if I coudl make it. I was either going to pass out or spontaneously errupt in orgasm. Maybe both.
Mercifully S took me home. My clothes came off... except that panty and the plug. The S took off her pants and flopped on the couch. She ordered me to my knees... I had to make her cum first. "Lick my pussy, slut" is all I remember her saying. I dove into her pussy with a fury. It was the only release I was going to get and I wanted it bad! I don't think i've ever done anything with so much energy and enthusiasm! I just need some kind of outlet for all that sexual energy.
Nevermind that my body was shaking practically out of control form the excitement. Seriously .. it felt like some kind of seizure.
S must have cum, because the next thing I remember she was pushing me down on the floor. She started rubbing my pussy through the panty and I started cumming immediately. I'm not sure what happened... I know it was one of those long orgasms that started and never stopped. I'm sure she kept me there for a long time, but i have no idea. I just remember cumming, and then not cumming, and wondering what the hell had just happened. I was exhausted.
S wiped her very wet and slimy hand on my face, covering me with my own pussy juices. It was sexy, erotic, gentle, caressing. I just sat enjoying her touch, rolling my face against her hand.
The panties came off. The plug came out. The plug went into my mouth. No surprse. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
We went into the bedroom and slept the rest of the afternoon....
And about that dress... we had a party to go to Wednesday night. She had just bought me the outfit I was going to wear.... dress, shoes, no bra of course, panties, and yes, butt plug.
But that is another story.
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So it was a Holiday weekend, which meant S came to visit. I couldn't spend anywhere near as much time with her as I wanted, but we did get to spend some time together. I'll try to fill everyone in on all the fun ...
S arrived Wednesday night, so we got to go out on a "date." It never really feels like a date when I'm with S. We're either best friends just hanging out, or I'm the SlutWhoreGoddess, serving up the nastiest sex imaginable. It never has that "date" feeling.
Wednesday came close though. I wasn't expecting a massive sex romp, but I was really excited to see her, so I dressed up in the dress she gave me (the nice one, not the super slut one) and made myself up a bit. I almost never make myself up... I'm usually an as-is type of girl, but I just wanted to make some kind of effort for her, especially since I didn't think there was going to be any sex.
We went to dinner and had blast. We chatted like best friends, although there was a hint of something else in the air - romance I guess. I've never had a relationship like this - hell, I've never had a relationship at all, so I guess that was what a real date must be like. I just didn't expect it to be with another girl sitting across the table.
We stayed late at the restaurant until after they closed and then left. There were very few cars in the parking lot. As I was about to get in the car, S stopped me.
"OK, Coat off." It really wasn't that cold out and as soon as she said the words I knew where it was going. I tossed my coat into the car.
"Dress off." My smile was so wide it about cracked my face off. I really cannot explain how happy it made me to hear those words. She was taking charge. I was going to serve. And I was going to be naked outside.
I tossed my dress into the car and stood their wearing nothing but my shoes. Of course I wasn't wearing anything underneath. That would be just crazy!
We stood their for a few minutes. I was anxiously and eagerly awaiting some instructions, hoping she'd send me for a walk or perform some kinky act. Instead she had me get in the car.
"It's a little too public here."
S is always thinking and taking care of me. Somebody else wouldn't have cared about the potential consequences. Of course she was right. This was too public and too close to home.
She drove for about half an hour to a nearby college campus. I seriously can't even count how many colleges there are around here, but this one was out of the way and practically deserted.
We got out of the car and she walked me over to a large campus map with a "you are here" sticker on it. She gave me my cell phone and told me to stay put. Then she got back in the car and drove off.
I stood there totally naked by the sign, under a bright light, holding my phone. I wondered if anyone saw me, but that really didn't make much of a difference. Being naked in a public place drives me wild - people or no.
My phone rang. It was S. She had me look at the map and told me where she was at. My job - come to her. I flipped closed my phone and started walking across the dark campus.
I kept waiting to meet someone on the path, but that never happened. Even so, by the time I got to the place she said she was at, I was horny as hell. She wasn't around. I called her. She answered and told me to find the campus map that was here. I found the other map and stood before it. Then I got my instructions...
I was to lean up against the map and masturbate ... with my phone. I had to set my phone on vibrate. S would keep calling me so it would buzz my clit. I couldn't answer until I had an orgasm.
Holy crap! I love how this girl thinks!
I've never used a vibrator before. I had no idea what the buzzing was going to be like. Honestly, the buzzing wasn't so great, but the surprise was. I never knew exactly when it was going to start, so it was always a shock. It would buzz for a few minutes and then stop and then there would be a wait. It was the anticipation and the sudden shock that was driving me wild...
Well, that and the whole idea of standing naked out in the middle of a college campus rubbing my phone against my pussy.
I didn't come quickly, but I came. Even then I didn't answer the phone right away because I wanted it to last a bit. I knew S wouldn't mind. Eventually I answered the phone.
She asked me if it was good - I told her it was great. She asked me if my phone smelled like pussy and I told her it did. She had me look at the map and figure out where she "really" was. I sorta didn't think she was there, but I didn't mind. I could, and would, and wanted to play that game all night.
She also told me to turn the volume ALL the way up on my phone in addition to vibrating. After I hung up I had to stuff the phone into my pussy as deep as it would go. She would be calling me as I walked and I wasn't allowed to answer.
There was no way I was going to say no to that. Ok, I wouldn't have said no to anything because I just don't say no... but that was hot. And fun.
The walk was sexy, fun, silly, and just amazing. I really had no idea when it would go off, and the ringtones coming out of my pussy were just hysterical. I loved every minute of it.
When I got to my destination, S was there waiting for me. I danced my way across the path to her, buzzing and music coming out from between my legs. We were laughing and I was feeling very naughty.
She had me lean against the car and make myself cum again while she teased me by dialing my number. The ring tones were a serious distraction so this took a while. At the end I had to retrieve my phone, which was very slimy. Seriously ... I had no idea. Mega slime.
I got to lick some of the slime off, and was a bit surprised when S ran her tongue along it too, slurping up some of my juices. I found it very sexy and incredibly arousing.
We kissed and made out, but no hardcore sex. S kept her clothes on the whole time even though I was naked. The I got dressed, we got in the car, and she drove me home.
And that was Wednesday night. I'll try to share more later.
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I've been unbelievably horny for over a week now. Ever since coming back with my visit from S I've just been insatiable. All I think about is sex, all the time. I'll just be sitting there and suddenly I'm very aware of my pussy needing attention, or I feel my ass yearning to be stuffed.
It's been a rough week.
I'm usually a pretty horny girl. I masturbate every day pretty much without fail. I might go a day, or even two, without making myself cum, but it's usually once, sometimes twice every day. And every now and then I just get out of control and I'm rubbing out out 3 or 4 times a day.
It's been like that every day for a week now. And today i was so pathetic, I didn't go to school so I could stay home and play with myself. It's not even noon and I've cum three times, mostly with the help of a hairbrush that keeps finding its way into my ass. Now it's gotten all sunny and I can't stop thinking about maybe a little walk in the sun and some outdoor masturbation.
I can't stop thinking about it.
And if anyone cares, yes I'm naked. I never got dressed this morning. I've been naked all day.
I'm obsessed with anal. Just about every time I look at something I wonder what it would be like to shove that up my ass. Every day I pick something different and just a little bit larger to stuff up there. For the last couple of days I've been eying up the cans of soda in the fridge thinking "someday... someday soon."
None of my friends have tried anal. Or if they have they won't admit it. I'm really struggling with how much I love anal play. Is it possible for a girl to love anal more than regular sex? I've tried looking it up on the internet, but that's been no help. I've read a couple articles claiming that NO woman really likes anal, but I know that can't be true. (Can it?) Most women say it's something "special" that they only do for special relationships. I guess that makes me an anal slut or something.
The one thing I love about CM is that I get to meet, or at least read about, people who are into the same fucked up shit that I am. I don't feel like such a freak. So if there are any women out there who love anal more than regular sex, I'd appreciate it if you drop me a line just to say "you're not the only anal freak in the world."
Guys, I know you're anal freaks, so you don't have to write.
(j/k)
Sunday I freaked out .. damn, was it just two days ago?... it was a cold, miserable, rainy day, so i took off wearing my long coat. I told mom I was going to the coffee shop, which is where I practically live sometimes. Well, I *did* go to the coffee shop, but there I went straight into the bathroom, stripped naked and stuffed all my clothes into my book bag. Then I walked out wearing nothing but my coat and my boots.
Yeah, my boots aren't really that sexy, but they're boots.
Yeah, I bought some coffee on the way out.
And then I just walked around in the cold rain, horny as hell. At one point I got on a bus and just road it around awhile, absolutely on fire with how hot I was... riding a bus around wearing nothing but my coat. After at least an hour, I was miles from home and so horny that my hands were shaking. The idea of masturbating there on the bus was driving me crazy, but I knew that it was just insane.
I got off the bus at the next stop. I was so shaking so much I could barely stand. I had *no* idea where I was because I hadn't been paying attention. I walked a little way, and then finally just slipped into an alley between two buildings. I unzipped my coat all the way and just started playing. I close my eyes. Then I was cumming... one of those insane orgasms that just doesn't stop. I opened my eyes and wondered to myself: "was I just screaming?"
Seriously, I didn't know. I thought I might have been.
I zipped up, then found a place to go put my clothes back on. Then I made the trip home on another bus. Of course none of that helped, I was still horny the whole time.
And now I think I need to go out for a walk. I'm thinking the sexiest pair of shoes I own and a coat, nothing underneath. I'll be taking my hairbrush ... unless I can find something bigger.
God I'm such a slut.
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This is part 2. You should read part 1 in the previous entry.
Sunday was completely different than Saturday from the moment I woke up. Within about a minute S was pulling my hair and talking filth to me and we immediately went into the bathroom where she used me as a toilet. I don't think I completely woke up until sometime in the middle of it, with her piss streaming into my face and mouth. I'm sure I wore more than I swallowed. As soon as she was one though, I had a huge grin on my face. I was in for some special treatment today. Yesterday we were lovers for the most part. Today I would be her slave slut, her filthy whore, a toy, a plaything, a pet.
I was ready, willing, and eager.
We showered, but it was a more submissive kind of shower. I was responsible for cleaning her and serving her. I spent a lot of time on my knees with my face buried in her pussy and my tongue in her ass. Once I had cleaned her, she left and told me to wash myself. She also told me to play with myself until it she said it was ok to come out of the shower.
So a washed up, ran a razor across all those areas that needed a touch up, lathered up a second time and then leaned up against the wall to indulge myself. I lost track of time, but when she called it me it was because room service was here. She had ordered breakfast. Today I would be answering the door not only naked but wet.
It was the same guy as the day before, looking just as approving as the day before. I wanted to invite him in so I could suck his cock. Instead I just flirted some more and told him I'd be there monday too. He said he'd see me and I said "probably."
We ate breakfast while I toweled off. My hair was still wet when S pulled out Sunday's outfit. It was another dress and probably more expensive than yesterday's, but it was a much different kind of dress. I suppose Little Black Dress might describe it, but that doesn't do it justice. It was a slut dress. Maybe even a whore dress. It tied behind the neck and had a half back and a plunging neck. And the whole thing had rows of diamond shaped holes in it.
The first row was right down the middle of the front right between the breasts. The first diamond was large enough and strategically placed to either show off the middle of the bra, or more likely to show that no bra was worn. In that case the hole revealed an ample amount of boob - not just from the top, but the bottom as well. It managed to hide nipples, somehow, but the bottoms of the tits were totally visible.
That row continued down the center of the dress with wider diamonds across the belly and narrower ones at the bottom. The last diamond was very low. Either obscenely low or sexy low depending on how you look at it. That bottom diamond would reveal any panties if you wore them. If you weren't wearing panties, which of course I wasn't, it would show public hair if you had any, which of course I didn't. In other words, it would definitely show off your brazillian or smoothed shaved mound. Again the holes managed to stop short of revealing everything, so my pussy was hidden.
Each side had a row of diamonds running top to bottom, which basically emphasized that the wearing had nothing on underneath. And the back had several huge cut outs to it amounted to basically no back at all.
And of course the thing was very tight and very short.
I definitely looked the roll of whore, or maybe high-class call girl. Again I felt like a million bucks, but this was different than the day before. Today I felt like I was going to get paid a million bucks to fulfill sexual fantasies, maybe on a stage, maybe with a dozen men.
S completed my outfit with a pair of black heels that were unbelievably tall, and a chain leash that she clipped to my collar.
Suddenly, I was a whole new kind of slut.
She led me out of the hotel room and into the car, leading me with the leash. We drove for at least 90 minutes until we came to a small, practically deserted town next to a lake. S explained to me that this place had practically shut down a few weeks earlier.
We got out of the car. S had me put my hands behind my back, which she locked up in a pair of handcuffs. Then we started my walk through town.
The town was deserted more or less. We saw about 4 people, all locals, who gave me cold stares. I was feeling some harsh humiliation. And I was also freezing. This dress was not warm by any standards, and it wasn't as nice a day as yesterday.
S led me down the street for 20 minutes or so until we came to a dry dock. I'd never seen a dry dock before but realized that's what it was. There were over a hundred ships, mostly yachts and such, up on the shore all secured for winter. S led me down to the docks and between the rows of ships. Walking in heals on the large stones was about impossible. I was struggling to keep from falling on my face.
Finally S stopped between two ships. I was facing the lake, about 40 feet from it. We were fairly hidden between the boats.
S untied the dress behind my neck and then pulled if off me. I stood there naked in my heels with my hands cuffed behind me. She unhooked the leash from my collar, and then grabbed the thickest rope I'd ever seen from one of the ships. The rope had a hook on it, which she hooked to my collar.
She blindfolded me. She kissed me. She told me not to go anywhere. And I heard her walk away.
I shivered because it was freezing. All sorts of crazy thoughts started going through my head about being seen, or taken advantage of. Of how long I might be stuck there. For some reason I decided that S was taking my dress back to the car, so I would be there for at least an hour. Fantasies began to go through my mind, but they were interrupted every time i got cold.
And then someone was touching me. I'd been too lost in my dreams to notice anyone come up. It wasn't someone touching me... it was two someone's at least... and they were men's hands.
Suddenly I was very scared. I didn't know who had found me or what they were going to do to me. This COULD be a fantasy, but this could also be VERY bad. I didn't know which it was. I tried to call all, but nothing came out of my mouth. After a few more tries I manged to croak S's name.
The hands stopped exploring me.
I called for S again.
I heard her whisper in my ear. "I'm hear baby. Are you alright?" She'd never called me baby before, but it was soooo comforting.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I just needed to know she was there and this was all her doing. She asked me if I wanted to go on and I told her yes. She asked a second time and I told her yes again. I'd do anything she wanted. I felt her kiss the side of my neck just over the collar.
The hands resumed, but now I was not afraid. I was into it. Enjoying it a little at first, but eventually loving it. The hands were more bold, going into my pussy and ass, tugging and twisting my nipples, even stretching my mouth.
I had reached that point... that point where I would do anything. Where I WANTED to do anything. I wanted to be used. Violated. Enjoyed. I was an object whose only reason for existence was the pleasure of others, and I loved my purpose. I craved it.
Under S's instructions I got down on my knees, which was painful as hell on those rocks. Then I was sucking two cocks. One and then the other. They were being thrust at my face, and then slapped against it. And then came the amazing instruction.
"Stuff both of them in her mouth."
I couldn't believe it. I didn't know it was possible. BUt as soon as I heard it i wanted it more than anything else in the world. I needed to prove that there was nothing too kinky or filthy that I wouldn't do it. No sex act beyond my will or abilities.
Both cocks were jammed into my mouth, stretching my lips. I thought my face was going to rip open, but all I could think about was taking more, deeper... I wanted a double deep throat. Not that that would be in any way possible, but that wouldn't stop me from trying.
Then I was standing again. They bent me over and I was fucked... one in the ass and one in the mouth. S told them to be rougher, to go deeper, and I wanted it. Every few minutes they switched. Mouth to ass. Ass to mouth. I was getting used and a bit abused and loving it. This was what I was meant for.
The fucking went on for some time and then I was on my knees again keeping my mouth wide open. I took both loads in my mouth with expressed orders not to swallow or close it.
S's voice came from above, describing how full of cum my mouth was and what a good slut I was. She had my swallow. I said thank you. It just seemed like the right thing to say. She asked me if I enjoyed it and I said yes. I asked for more. S told me the guys were done but she would give me more latter.
She helped me stand up. Kissed me again... I tried so hard not to let that kiss end, but she pulled away from me. Then she started playing with my pussy... rather harshly actually. Rubbing my clit and fingering me hard and deep.
She talked dirty to me the whole time, asking me if I was good slut, and if I liked having my ass fucked, and two cocks in my mouth. I came quickly. Very quickly. She told me to cum again. That I was going to cum 4 times - once for each of the guys, once for her, and once for me.
All I could say was "yes." She made me cum those three more times and then smeared my pussy juices all over my face. She kissed me again and told me to wait.
I waited again. This time I wasn't cold because I was on fire. I kept reliving the last hour or so over in my imagination, then remembering the day before. I felt so strong and sexy. I was the sexiest woman alive. Nobody could match my sexuality. I am the SlutWhoreGoddess.
I waited and waited without fear. And then the handcuffs were undone. With my arms free I suddenly realized how sore and cramped they were. I heard S's voice as she started to massage me. The collar was unhooked. The blindfold came off. Standing there between the ships, S gave me a good massage, finding some sore spots I didn't realize I'd had.
I asked about the guys and who they were, but she refused to tell me. She wouldn't even say how old they were or what race. She told me it was better that way and I had to agree. Anonymous sex is quiet a fantasy that I didn't want to spoil. I doubt I could do it myself, but having her control the participants makes me feel very safe. I told her I would do it again.
She told me to put on my dress but I told her I wanted to walk around naked. She agreed, but said I couldn't walk through town, which was probably smart. Two run-ins with the cops wouldn't be a good idea. So she put my on my leash and walked me around the dry dock. Then we went out on the dock itself sticking out in the lake. I had an amazing view of the whole town. Businesses. Houses. Whatever. I imagined them all looking out their window's at me and seeing me there, naked on the dock.
'C'mon, Slut," she said. "Time to get some dinner."
The whole afternoon had gone. We had been there for hours. We walked off the dock and through the boats again. She had me put on my dress and then led me through town to the car. We drove to yet another town to find a small hole in the wall to eat dinner. I insisted that she keep me on the least, which she was more than happy to oblige me with.
After dinner it was back to the car, and a short drive to the hotel parking lot. She made me play with myself and cum in the car while she watched. Then we went inside. The dress came off before I was allowed into the room, but I kept the leash on.
That night we made love again... much more kinky than either of the two previous nights. That leash found its way inside my pussy.. and my ass ... and I licked and sucked it clean after. I servered her every way I could, trying to please her again and again and again.
And before we went to sleep, she used me again as her toilet. And I went to bed happy. So fucking happy. I wish every weekend could be so good.
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Monday was a holiday and you know what that means: three day weekend. That means I got to actually spend some time with S.
I've mentioned this before. S's family is disgustingly rich. Ok, maybe it's not disgusting, but my mom and me a dirt poor so it seems disgusting sometimes. S had a car. I don't. S's family has two homes. Mom and I share a tiny apartment. S has nice clothes. I don't. S can go anywhere she wants. I have to walk or ride the bus.
So the first big thrill of my three day weekend was a bus ticket from S. It made me happy because I wanted to see her, but it almost made me want to cry. Fantastic kinky sex I can give. Things that cost money, not so much. I could never pay her back. I could only hope to make it up to her.
So Friday afternoon I got on the bus near home, which took me to the bus station. There I got on a bus which, two hours later, got me to another bus station. At that station I popped into the totally filthy women's room and stripped off all my clothes. I put on a modest but still kind of short skirt, some shoes, the collar S had given me, and my jacket. No shirt. No bra. No panties. I slipped out and caught the next bus and eventually, six hours after I'd left, arrived at some tiny bus station in the middle of nowhere.
Before getting off the bus I unzipped my jacket nice and low to show S and the rest of the world there was nothing underneath. There were only about 10 people at the station, but I only cared if one noticed. I got off the bus and saw her there and the whole world just faded away. I'd never *really* understood that expression until that moment - the world was gone, just her.
I rushed over to her, wrapped my arms around her, and just started kissing. It's been weeks since we've seen each other. I've missed her so much. We probably got a lot of stares... at least I hope we did... but I didn't notice.
We went back to her car and got in. She started driving and minutes later we were at a hotel - a nice hotel for the middle of nowhere. I asked her about it because I was expecting to stay with her at school, but she explained that the school wouldn't allow guests. Besides, we wanted to be alone. Her roommate would get in the way.
S had already checked in earlier, so we just went straight to the room. She stopped me befoer I went through the door. "Clothes off," she told me. I giggled and disrobed in the hall way, which didn't take much. First I handed her my coat, then I kicked the shoes through the doorway, then I tossed my skirt in. She told me to wait a sec and closed the door. I stood naked in the hallway, wondering if anyone would come out. Suddenly I'd gone from just happy to see her to a happy little slut.
The door opened and S gave me the ice bucket. She told me to fill it and come back. I told her I had no idea where the ice machine was and she said "neither do I." I guess I needed to do some exploring.
I picked a direction and went, reached the end of the hall and came up empty. I was excited as hell. Walking naked through the hall was such a thrill. I kept expecting to see someone, or have a door open at any moment. I absolutely loved it. I walked back the way I came, turned a corner, walked some more and eventually found the ice machine. I filled the bucket and walked back ... still nobody around, but that didn't matter. I was on fire. I was very aware of my tits and pussy as I walked through the halls. You know how most of the time you aren't aware of certain parts of your body? Well, I was AWARE, believe me.
Then I got back to our hall and felt like a total dumbass. I didn't know which room was ours. I just sort of shook my head and laughed at how stupid I was. I picked a door and knocked. Nothing. I knocked louder. Still nothing. I went to the next door and knocked. This one opened and S was there. I was relieved and disappointed all at the same time. If it had been someone else...
We went into the hotel room and started making out, playing with the ice, S taking the lead. She teased my tits, and neck, and lips, and hips, and pussy, and ass with it. It found its way into all my holes and crevices. It was delight. An erotic delight. Subtle. Sexy. Delicate. Not crude, kinky, and pornographic.
And after a long time playing with ice, we hopped into bed for some serious passionate lovemaking, followed by sleep.
Saturday morning we woke up, fooled around a little, showered together. It felt fun and romantic. It felt so adult being in a hotel room together instead of her parent's house or my mom's apartment. We ordered room service for breakfast at the last minute. It was something like 11 o'clock.
S got dressed while I just sat on the bed watching her. I had nothing but my collar on, which I had slept in, but taken off when I was in the shower. I was wondering if I would wear any clothes at all for three days. And yes, I liked the idea. When the knock at the door came for room service S told me to answer it. I didn't even ask. I knew she meant naked. She new that I wanted it too.
I walked over to the door with nervous excitement, but also a growing sexual buzz. I opened the door. There was a college-aged kid there, who didn't seemed surpirsed, but instead gave me this look. It was clear that he liked what he was seeing, so I flirted with him. I'm such a slut and I love it.
I closed the door and brought breakfast in. S and I ate together, but mostly I was thinking about sex and being a slut and wanting to fuck right then and there.
Instead S reached into a drawer and pulled out a dress for me. A nice dress. I was blown away. It wasn't a slutty dress or a ballroom gown. It was just a nice fall dress that I would probably never buy for myself. I'm sure it cost the same as 3 pairs of jeans, say. I could never afford such an indulgence. I started adding up the costs in my head - bus ticket, hotel room, dress, food. I started feeling low and worthles, and not in that good sexual way. Yeah, I like sexual humilation and degradation but this, not so much.
I put the dress on and felt like a million bucks. It was just a stupid dress, but it was pretty and really fit me well. Somehow it made me look pretty too. I mean... I consider myself average, y'know? I'm not a model or barbie doll or bombshell or whatever. I'm just... average. Not bad looking, but not exactly good looking either. Nobody is going to call me ugly and make fun of me, but nobody is going to whistle when I walk by ... maybe that's why I love dressing like a slut or being naked in public. That's one way to get attention.
So we went out, me wearing my wonderful dress, so shoes, and my collar. Somehow the collar went with the dress. No panties. No bra. But feeling like a million bucks.
We drove a little bit to some small town that was holding some kind of fall festival. We walked up and down the street, holding hands, sometimes kissing. We were very "out". If anyone noticed, I missed it. We were just having way too much fun laughing, talking, and being a couple ... in love.
There I said it. We're in love.
We spend a few hours just wandering about, looking at things, visiting stores and never buying anything, and enjoying the festival. And then we walked by some horses and buggies that were offering rides.
"My friend wants to ride naked in your buggy," said S to one of them. The .. jockey (? - what would you call them?) .. was a woman and looked at us skeptically, like it was some kind of joke. Meanwhile S's words had struck me like a giant bucket of fuck. I've talked about switches inside of me, but this was something else. Seriously, it was like someone had poured a bucket of icy water over me that shocked me into suddenly being a nymphomaniac.
It took me totally by surprise.
Yes, I wanted to ride naked in the buggy. You're damn right I did. That's a fucking fantasy that's too good to imagine.
S managed to convince the woman by giving her a few bills. I don't know how much it was, but it must have been enough to make it worth her while. Then S turned to me and said "ok, dress off. Let's go."
So I took off the dress, right there on the sidewalk, and hopped in to the buggie. Un-fucking-believable. The ride around town was the most amazing thing in my life. The wind was biting at me, making my skin somehow feel alive. There were stares and cheers and probably a few photographs. And through it all I was just so ... charged. It was sexy. Slutty. Adrenal. It was 400 gallons of coffee, a bucket of cold water, and a constant electric shock. And it all felt good. Fantastic. Amazing. Powerful. Liberating. Orgasmic.
And it came to an end all too soon.
And of course it was immediately followed by a run in with the police. S told me not to say and thing and she would handle it. I *should* have felt nervous or scared, but I was so high after the buggie ride that I just couldn't come down. Keeping me quiet was probably a good thing. Instead S negotiated with the police officers, telling them our names, and the name of her school, and a whole bunch of other things that I can't even remember. Seriously, I was just too fucking wired from the ride to think straight. I think she said something about not wanting her parents to find out and then suddenly we were free to go with a warning.
I can only figure that somehow the kids at her school get out of hand from time to time, so as long as there was no real damage done they let stuff like this go. S wouldn't say much, other than to just forget about it. There really wasn't much to forget, since I was still thinking about that buggie ride. I really couldn't concentrate on anything else.
We went to dinner at a nice place. I can't remember a damn thing about it. Seriously, all I wanted to do was scream "I rode naked through the streets" at the top of my lungs. Despite the run-in with the cops I just felt so ... victorious. Accomplished.
After dinner we got into her car and drove for a bit to what seemed like an old barn. The sign outfront said some kind of studio. Inside we met with an obviously gay man in his 40s where S introduced me as "the friend I'd told you about." The man asked someting about the collar staying on or off. S said on. I was lost. He told us the changing room was down the hall.
The inside of the barn was actually kind of nice. It was refurbished to be "livable", but it was really some kind of art studio. S lead me down the hall to a small room which ... well ... it was a changing room. S told me to get undressed, which took about 10 seconds since all I had on was the dress and some shoes.
The she stated kissing me, and mauling me. She was just all over me, licking and sucking and fingering. Her hand went immediately to my pussy and never left for a good 15 minutes. She didn't say a thing and when I asked she told me to hush.
The guy's vocie came from down the hall saying they were ready. I asked ready for what. S explained.
I was modeling, nude, for an art class for the next 90 minutes.
"And I love how your pussy swells up when your turned on."
She was right. My pussy was swollen. And wet. A dripping. And smelling like sex.
She pushed me out the door, naked except for my collar, and told me to go down the hall. I could only smile. A naked buggie ride and now THIS. I was in heaven. And this time I was feeling naughty and sexy and horny and slutty.
I walked out into the studio where about 15 people were waiting for me. "Oh, you didn't find the robe?" said the man. I felt like such an idiot, but could only laugh. I saw S enter the room from the other side and smile.
And so I modeled naked for an art class. Boys, girls, men, women... mostly younger, in their 20s, but some older. Every time I looked at one I wanted to fuck them... each guy, every girl, no matter how old or young. In fact, I felt like I was fucking them. The entire experience was very sexual, probably because I'd just been felt up in the changing room.
And then my eyes settled on S who was just smiling at me, looking so approving. And I felt so good about myself.
The session ended. Instead of going back to the changing room I rushed across the studio and threw my arms around her and gave her a huge kiss. I wanted to fuck her right there in front of everyone so they could see just how much she meant to me and what I would do for her.
She told me to mingle and left me there among the artists. I mingled. I can't beleive I did it, but I mingled. S came back a few minutes later and tossed my dress at me and we left. I didn't put the dress on. Seriously, it felt weird getting dressed in front of people.
When I got outside and found it was freezing, then I put the dress on. We got in the car, went back to the hotel, and made love all night. Not terrinbly kinky. But I did everything I could to please her.
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OK - it's been a while. School has started so I don't have all day with nothing to do but be a slut. LOL.
S goes away to a different school, so I have been alone for a couple weeks. I can't dress like a total slut at school (just a partial slut), so that's cutting out a lot of play.
I wish had time to write everything that happened over the holiday weekend. It was SO good. I like to think that I lived out some incredible fantasy sex that most people never experience or even imagine. It was a lot of group stuff mostly - lots of MMF, some MFF - and lots of me "serving" everyone. It wasn't particularly kinky or hard core or whatever you want to call it, but it was still fantastic.
I'll just give you some highlights:
Have two guys cum in each of my eyes. I had to hold my eyelids open with my fingers to not blink. It burned like hell, but it was very hot and very kinky. I fantasize about doing this again... and again..
With my hands tied behind me, I was lead naked down the driveway - it's about a half a mile a think - to the street. Out in the street I was bent over while two boys fucked me - one in the ass, one in the mouth. Yes, the switched every few minutes. Not one single car passed, but that doesn't matter. I was getting fucked IN THE STREET. That was totally hot.
S "loaned" me out to a couple. I really just can't get over the depravity of this. She just gave me to them and said "use her any way you want, she'll do it, she'll love it." Of course she was right. The play itself was kind of tame (although it was my first MFF so it was really hot - just nothing kinky). But the huge turn on here was that I was such and object. I'm just a fuck toy for other people's pleasure. It's like I don't exist as anything other than thing to be passed around, and shared. I think it's kind of the ultimate act of degradation, which makes it such a turn on. I'm just a thing.
I mean, other thing can be awful and humiliating (like having to crawl naked into a dumpster and masturbate). Those are more degrading and abusive. But abuse is a different kind of turn on.
I can't explain.
Anyway, yeah, so not a lot of sex since. S had gone away to school. I'm absolutely dieing to see her, but I can't. Even if she comes to visit, I'm not sure what kind of time we'll have together. She'd have to visit on a weekend and stay with her parents. We certainly couldn't play at her parents house or my mom's apartment. It's getting just a little cold out ... and it's going to get colder. I love public play and all, but I'm not into freezing so much.
But S does send me incredibly sexy e-mails and texts to keep me going. Sometimes they include tasks to perform, which I love.
On Friday I wore a short, short skirt to school - no panties. I love wearing skirts without panties, but honestly don't have the nerve to dress like that at school. I would have never done it without S's prodding. And the kink here - instead of panties I wore a strip of duct tape over my pussy. Anyone who stole a look up my skirt (probably not hard to do) got a really special treat! It was like having the work SLUT written wear people could see it. To add to the kink factor, I had to carry a roll of duct tape with me to school because I had instructions to remove the tape before lunch, and replace it after. Pulling that tape off was amazing! I wanted to stop and make myself cum right there. After lunch I couldn't concentrate on anything all day!
The only other really hot thing I've done in the past few weeks was a couple weekends ago. Anyone in the PA area might remember that it was kind of cold and rain a couple weekends back. S had me walk to the mall. When I got there, I went into the bathroom, stripped off my clothes and stuffed them into my backpack. Then I walked around the mall wearing nothing but my rain coat (just two buttons!). I was on the phone with S most of the time, although she did "let me go" to just walk around for about an hour by myself. She told me I had to visit every store, which I did. I definitely got noticed! I got some really approving looks and long stares (guys and girls... I LOVE getting stares), and a few scowls from some prudes. Whatever. By the end I was just too horny, so S had me go to a store and grab some pants off the rack to "try on." Of course, I didn't try anything on. It was just a reason to get me into a changing room. In the changing room I took off my coat and snapped the pants hanger on my nipples. S made me sit on the floor, facing the door of the changing room. The room had a curtain instead of a door, and it stopped about 9 inches short of the floor. Essentially I was showing off my pussy to anyone who bothered to peek under the curtain. I don't *think* that happened, but that didn't matter. :-) Sitting there on the floor I made myself cum (I was still on the phone with S). Then I put on my clothes (I was carrying them in my backpack, remeber?), and left.
It was very hot, but it's really the best sex I've had in since S left.
I'll try to drop by and write something else if it happens. Right now I'm just really busy though.
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It's a long weekend. I've been naked for almost 24 hours now and I think it's going to be one awesome ride. I'm really too excited to think straight, but I know I want to write this down as it happens.
Ok... first...
The past week or so since our last adventure (make that PAINFUL adventure) S and I have been taking it easy. We've been seeing each other, but it's mostly spending time together followed by soft and gentle making out. We've got our reasons. You figure it out.
The only real kink is that sometime last week S asked me to stop shaving my pussy. Normally I'm hairless. I've been hairless for.. well, honestly since not long after I got hair. Seriously, I started shaving about 3 months after my hair started coming in... but that's not important.
In any case, I've been miserable, itchy, and otherwise suffering for the last several days as my hair grows back in. I really didn't know why S was making me do this, but she was. Somewhere along the way I talked myself into thinking she was torturing me on the first week of school. Not only was it torture not being able to itch in the middle of class, but it was smart torture since I kept thinking about S all day.
And yes, I've started school this week. For some reason the douchebags who made the schedule decided we needed 3 days of school before a 4 day weekend. Whatever. Assholes.
S and I have gone away for the weekend... to paradise. S's parents not only live in a frickin mansion but they own a second "cottage" up in the middle of nowhere. By cottage, they mean mansion made up of hard wood everything. It only has 3 bathrooms instead of 5, and a deck that's twice the size of my mom's apartment.
I'm jealous with a helping of anger. I admit that rich people make me angry and I know it's because I've gone without for my whole life. Sorry. You don't want to hear that. I'll stop whining.
Anyway, S picked me up at the apartment around 3:30 yesterday. I got in her car and we started driving. My was ok with us going away for the weekend. In fact, mom seems ok with my and S having a relationship. I'm sure it's a good thing mom doesn't know all the details, but she's cool with the girl-girl thing. Thank you mom. I won't mention you again.
Anyway, after we hit the highway S had me undress, which was the last time I had clothes on. In fact, she told me I wasn't allowed to wear clothes all weekend, which is a promise I'm pretty sure she's going to make me keep. The idea excited me then, and it still excites me now, especially considering how this weekend is going.
We drove for about 3 hours.. ok, maybe closer to 4. We went through a drive in for food, which was - of course - a turn on for me. I was horny as hell by the time we got to the "cottage" but S wasn't letting me indulge myself... or her... or anything.
She made me leave my clothes and my bag in the car. Then she made a point of letting me know that she had the keys and I wasn't wearing anything or going anywhere until she said so. I was - and am - at her mercy. She holds power over me. It's not just "pretend" power, but actual power. I have no choice but to be naked for as long as she wants. There's no turning back. Even if I change my mind and want to wear clothes for some reason, I cannot unless she lets me. It's a feeling of ... helplessness? being owned? submission? I don't really know how to describe it. Vulnerability? I am not in control.
Whatever it is I love it. I welcome it. It's the state I belong in.
She gives me a collar to wear, and snaps it around my neck. It's not the cheap dog collar I've been wearing for the last 2 weeks. It's very nice. Black. Leather maybe. I'm really overwhelmed by the gift. I can't explain why it means to much to me, but it feels like the best thing anyone has ever given me. I want to get on my knees and beg to show my appreciation. I will do anything to please her.
We go into the cottage and wait. I'm expecting a serious kinked up fuckfest, but it doesn't happen. We wait. There's a knock at the door. S tells me not to say a word until she says it's ok.
The guests arrive. 3 guys, 2 girls, in 2 cars. They're all about my age. They are all old friends and go to some private school somewhere. I get some looks, but S doesn't introduce me. I don't catch any names.
S starts ordering me around, and somewhere along the line I figure it out. I am a slave. Not just a sex slave, but a total slave. A servent. Ok, a totally naked servent. That swtich inside me is flipped about ten times. Maybe it's a dial. I'm slutwhoregoddess, but I'm cranked up to 11.
For the next couple of hours, I am serving them drinks. S addresses me as "slut", which the others pick up on. I notice that they have naturally grouped into 3 couples. I get the suddent sinking feeling that I'm not going to be S's partner for the weekend, just a serving girl. I'm starting to get really nervous.
My head is filled with wild thoughts. I'm darting back and forth between fantasizing about massive orgies with me being forced to serve all 6 of them, to absolute misery at the thought that I might NOT be able to serve any of them, not even S. The hours pass and nothing sexual happens.
It gets passed midnight. And I'm still just serving drinks. I've been doing this for hours. Finally S catches me alone in the kitchen and asks me how I'm doing. I realize that I haven't spoken in hours either. Weird. I tell her the truth... I'm loving it, but I keep thinking it's going to get sexual. I'm worrying that it isn't going to happen. She touches my cheek with her hand and tells me it's coming. She wanted to go slow to see how everyone would take it. She didn't warn her friends about me, just the same as she didn't tell me about them. She wanted to make sure everyone was comfortable.
We go back into the other room and I am now on fire. So horny I could explode. More time passes and I serve more drinks. I can't stop thinking about sex. I'm humiliated as hell when I feel a drip of juice from my pussy start trickling down my leg.
1 o'clock. It begins.
S explains that "slut needs her pussy shaved" and asks if anyone wants to watch. It gets a few laughs, but everyone agrees. I'm sent to the bathroom for shaving cream, a razor, a towel, and some water. We set up in the dining room, which basically means me lieing on the table with my legs spread and all of them standing around watching.
I'm shaking... absolutely shaking ... with sexual excitement. I love public play, but this goes beyond anything I've ever done.
S asks who wants to go first. OMG, I think. ONE OF THEM is going to shave me. I'm going to be used tonight - maybe all weekend - by strangers. A fantasy come true. Scary as hell, but an insane turn on.
Slutwhoregoddess is cranked up to 12 or 13 now. I swear I can feel my pussy and nipples throbbing. Maybe it's in my head. I don't know.
They all seem reluctant until one of the girls cheerfully volunteers to go first. She lathers me up, whipes the excess shaving cream on my legs and belly, while yelling out "woohoo!" Then she starts the shaving....
And I start moaning. I'm almost embarassed, but I'm so fucking horny I can't help it. They all joke about my moans, and S explains that there's a good reason why my name is slut.
I catch her words carefully. It's not that she CALLS me slut, but that my NAME is slut. I meet her eys. I totally want to thank her for realizing the truth. Slut is who I am. I deserve the name.
Everybody takes a turn shaving me ... everyone except S. The boys are rougher with the razor, but also take the time to feel me up. They don't make any attempt to hide it either. All kinds of comments fly around about how wet I am, and how tight my pussy is, and a bunch of other things.
Once I'm shaved clean they take turns feeling me up for real now - no pretense about shaving. Even the girls get into it, which is a shock. Those two are noticably awkward, but still having a good time.
S just watches, sometimes giving instructions. She tells them not to let me cum, which I am desperately close to doing, and she scolds one of the boys for jamming too many fingers in my pussy. He tells him not to break her toy. Her toy. I love those words and find myself looking deep into her eyes. In fact, I'm looking deep into her eyes for most of the time.
S starts to interview me, making me tell them what a good slut I am. She's wording the questions carefully so as not to admit what her involvement is exactly, but she does a good job of making me describe my sexual experiences.
I've been fucked in the ass by one guy while deep throating another. I've drank piss - my own, a guy's, a girl's. I've walked naked in a park in the middle of the day. I've gone to the mall wearing nothing but a raincoat. I've gone on naked walks, on my own, in the middle of the night, and masturbated in public. I've had my ass fucked by a corona bottle. I've had fruit stuffed in my ass - including an apple - which I've then pooped out and eaten.
They seem impressed. In fact they're getting turned on. All of them. Look at me. I'm such a slutwhoregoddess that I can turn on six people at once! They're all thinking about me, wanting to fuck me, fantasizing about me.
Yeah, I'm full of myself, I know. But that's just what it FEELS like.
One of the guys and one of the girls has gotten very amorous listening to me. They're touching and playiing with each other shamelessly. Would they be so shameless if it weren't for me? I imagine them as a normally private couple who is being driven out of control by my sexuality. Soon they will fuck. She will do something filthy and deviant that she's never done before because she wants to be like me. He will fuck her fantasizing about me. Maybe I will join them and teach them both a thing or two.
S announces that I need some more direct attention and asks who wants a blow job. She asks me how long it's been since I've sucked cock. I tell them it's about a month. S says I'm overdue.
The first boy whips out his cock and puts it on my lips. S instructs me to remain on my back on the table, but lets me slide up so my head is hanging over the edge. She insists I keep my legs spread, and my arms stretched out to the side. Only my face is allowed to touch his cock.
The boy starts out gentle and needs some encouragement to shove it really deep. There's a whole lot of "wows" going around the table as I take his cock way down my throat. At some point when he's pulled out S asks me if I like it rough and I say yes. She makes me beg for a brutal face fucking. The boy starts getting rougher with me... nothing as rough as J, but it's still pretty rough. I gag. I tear a little. I love it.
He cums way deep in my throat, with his balls on my nose.
The next boy takes his place. He is rougher, but it's all bravado. He just wants to prove he's more of a man. It's all the same to me. It's still not nearly as brutal as J, and the fakeness is a little bit of a turn off. I feel like I'm in a crappy porn film, but that doesn't take away from the fact that I've still got an audience.
The third boy, who was been playing with his girlfriend the whole time, is next. She looks to him for assurance and she tells him to go ahead. Her hands guide his cock into my mouth and are on my face and head for most of the time. She and I make eye contact a few times. I think she envies me just a little, but I see something else. She's trying to figure out how to use me.
She tells her boyfriend not to cum in throat. She says his cum is hers. The boy obeys and pulls out when he's close to cumming. She jerks him off onto my face. She tells her boyfriend "this is for you" and bends down to lick his cum off my face.
I am in heaven. I'm moaning again. Seriously. I don't know how long we've been at it, but I'd been ready to cum since they started shaving me. Her face is soft and turning me on like I can't believe. I reach out for her tongue with my lips. She responds on we start making out. I try to grab her but S tells me to keep my hands out.
She breaks off. I want her so much and I want him to watch. I want everyone to watch. The couple kiss and cuddle and announce that they're going to bed. I look over and see that her shorts are down and he is fingering her... he HAD been fingering her while we kissed. I want her even more.
S tells me I've been a good slut and have waited long enough. She tells me to play with myself and make myself cum. I reach my hand down to my pussy and start playing. I start cumming almost instantly. It's one of those endless orgasms. S and I look at each other again. She knows. I know she knows. I don't want to stop, but it's for her. I can't explain that. But my orgasm is all about her, and to please her I will keep it going as long as possible.
S tells them about my endless orgasms, which gets another "wow" from the girl. I cum and cum and cum until S tells me to stop.
It's 4 am.
The boys and the girl head off to bed - separately. In fact the girl is griping - playfully - about how they get blowjobs and she's the only one going to bed alone. The boys offer invites - even for a 3-some - but she just says "in your dreams".
S takes me to bed with her, where I serve her for another couple of hours. It's all about her. Hot, steamy, and submissive. I please her until after the sun comes up. And then we go to sleep.
When we get up, it's afternoon. The couple - to my disappointment - has left. S assures me it's not me. They were only going to stay the night, but will be back on monday.
I'm still naked, with 2 boys, 1 girl, and S. I'm going to serve them all this weekend, and I cannot fucking wait.
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Sometimes I wonder what this summer would have been like without J. J really made me what I am today, and in so doing made S what she is. Yes, inside I am the Slutwhoregoddees and this was her year to come alive within me. I would have found someone to use me, I'm sure, but J was the one I found first, so he got the chance to mold me.
I would never have drunk piss if J hadn't showed me that video. S wouldn't have shown any interest in toilet play if she didn't think it was something that I like. So S and I are living out J's fantasy somehow, even though he never even met S.
And what if I had met some more conventional guy? Someone who was happy with just a few blowjobs? What would Slutwhoregoddess have done? Would she have gone unfulfilled? Or found someone else?
I don't know. But I wonder. But fate led me to where I am today.
On Monday night, S and I had a date. A genuine date. We were in public together, a couple. We went to dinner. Neither one of us was dressed like a slut... well, except that I pretty much never wear underwear anymore, but that's just the way I am always. J and I could never do that, which is one of the reasons I enjoy being with S so much. J was just crazy sex. S is a relationship with crazy sex.
And after a perfectly normal date - normal if you think two girls make a normal date. I know some people don't. Whatever.
After a perfectly normal date we found ourselves sitting on a blanket looking up at the night sky. We were sitting in an old cemetery across from an old church where S had parked the car. It was on some isolated road in the middle of nowhere, with houses only about ever quart of a mile. Lots of trees. Some open fields. Not a lot of traffic. It was late, and it was Monday, but still a car would zip by every now and then - not that they could have seen us.
We were just relaxing on the blanket, looking at the stars, talking. There was some kissing, but nothing too heavy. And then some quiet.
I pulled off my clothes, but not because of anything sexual, exactly. I love being naked outdoors, of course, but it was more about being naked with S. I BELONG naked with her. I should answer the door naked when she comes over. And be naked when we walk together. It's just the way I should be. I am her pet, perhaps. Loved but beneath her. I do not deserve clothes. Or maybe I should not wear them to demonstrate my lower status.
S asked me about it and I tried to explain. She kissed me gently, told me to wait, and took my clothes to the car. She came back with my dog leash and collar and put it on me.
I felt complete. Content. Perfect.
We snuggled in a very non-sexual way. I was her pet, showing love and loyalty.
But every so often a car would pass on the road, giving me a little rush of sexual energy. A cool wind would tickle my pussy or tweak my nipples. Sex is never far from my mind, and there were all kinds of little reminders to keep me thinking about it.
I think we sat for hours. I can't say. A long time passed until we decided it was time to go. S carried the blanket and led me on the leash across the street and to the church parking lot. I stood there naked by the car while she put everything away.
She looked at me.
"We should be doing something horrible to you," she said playfully.
"Yes," I answered. A hundred dirty, sick, and sexy ideas began to go through my mind.
S walked me over to some picnic tables that were on the church yard and had me lie on one of them with my arms and legs spread. My legs were hanging over the edge. She touched me lightly for awhile, teasing me. Then she told me to wait.
She walked back to the car while I waited. Anticipating was driving me crazy. S returned holding up her hairbrush.
"It's the best I could come up with," she said.
I've never really thought about her hairbrush before. Sure, I've seen it, but I've never really THOUGHT about it. She has one of those brushed where the bristles go all the way around the brush part, in a full circle. It almost looks like it could be stuffed up into a pipe for cleaning it out.
That's what I was thinking, and I took that thought to it's sexual conclusion. I wondered if S was thinking the same.
S took the brush and started teasing me with it, running the bristles along my entire body... my sides, my arms, my legs, my stomach, between my tits, my neck, my cheeks. I wondered if she would slap my across the face with the brush. I wondered a lot of things, actually. I kept imagining what that brush could do to me.
I wasn't too surprised or disappointed when she started to get rougher with it. The light touches became scraps and scratches, and then genuine beatings. She started with just random parts of my body, but soon found her way to my tits and nipples and then my pussy. The abuse was leaving me sore and scratched... everywhere.
I wish I could describe the sensation. It was pain.. kind of. But it was something else. I don't know if I can say pleasure exactly, but it wasn't just hurt. And as it increased in intensity I became more and more turned on. I wanted it to keep building, and become more intimate, and concentrate more on my private parts.
And I was moaning, and groaning, and twisting and turning as she abused me. My hands were clenched and my nails digging into the table. I was trying so hard to stay put and take it. Wrestling with my reactions. I wanted to jump away from it, curl up and protect myself. But at the same time I wanted to open up for more. And use my fingers to heighten the sensation by grabbing my nipples, or pussy, or biting my fingers, or something.
The beating and scratching became more intense and was now completely concentrated on my pussy. She ground the bristles into my clit, and spun the brush around on my pussy. She was smacking me with it really hard - maybe as hard as she could. I knew she wasn't holding back. And I was trying as hard as I could not to scream out. The pain was winderfully intense.
The bristles were starting to find their way near the opening of my pussy. Whether it was her intention from the start I can't say, but S was thinking about it now. Experimenting with the end of the brush near my hole.
She wasn't sure though, I could tell. I don't think she would have done it, but the thought was locked in my by then.
"Oh my god, fuck me!" I begged. "Fuck me!"
"You want it in you?" she asked. She wasn't sure.
"Do it! Please!" I put about 10 syllables in 'please'.
She gave me a big smile. She had been thinking it, and I think part of her even wanted it.
She slowly worked the brush into my pussy. The sensation was...
Well, it wasn't what I thought really. It was scratchy, and painful, but not nearly as painful as I thought it would be. It was two kinds of pain... a prickly pain and a stretchy pain. Well make that three types. There was also a scatchy pain.
She slowly worked the brush in and out, scraping and scratching the inside of my pussy. Looking back, I'm thinking it must have been rubbing me raw, because the intestity grew. Discomfort went to genuine pain to absolute agony.
But it wasn't just the rubbing, because the longer it went the rougher S became. She moved the brugh around in my faster and more sudden. She wasn't just moving it in and out, but spinning it around, and thursting it to the sides.
And then she pulled the brush out insanely quickly. She just ripped it out of me and I about exploded. I did let out a serious yelp.
Utterly. Fantastic. Pain.
Never felt anything like it.
She slowly worked the brush in, several more times, playing with me for a few minutes before ripping it out quickly. Each time I jumped and screamed.
"More?" she asked.
"More," I pleaded.
More I got.
She was becoming more agressive with her insertions. The were faster and harder and more abusive. Her play became rougher and rougher.
And then she stabbed the thing into me so hard that I started bawling like a baby. Pain to the millionth power. I turned over, curled up, and was screaming and bawling. I was thining that serious damage had been done. That I was going to die. She broke something down there.
And then I was like ... oh, she broke something down there.
S was suddenly not her normal self. I think she knew what was going on sooner than I did, but I also think she was devastated that she had hurt me so much.
"Oh my god!" she gasp. "There's so much blood." I heard her say shit about 50 times, but I was honestly feeling lightheaded.
Removing the brush was miserable. Completely miseable.
I heard S chuck it in a trash can.
I just lay there, waiting to die. But S saved me.
She gave me a pad to stop the bleeding, and then wiped me up with a towel. Since I didn't have any underwear, she took off hers and put it on me. There was no way I could wear a pad with just my shorts.
I was really useless though. S tended me. Took care of me. Got me dressed. Took me home. Practically carried me too my bed.
And she applogized about 5000 times.
I told her it was ok. I had asked for it and ... I wasn't sure how to put this....
"I'm glad it was you," I told her.
She looked at me and we both got a little teary. We kissed. She told me to rest and that she'd call me the next day.
And I pulled off my clothes and went to sleep, wearing my lover's underwear.
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S's family were busy on Sunday, which gave us an afternoon to play together at her place. She picked me up around 10:30 on Sunday morning, and then brought me back to her parent's house.
It's a palace. I had been suspecting, since she's got that nice car, but now I know. S lives in the "rich" part of town. Her parents are rolling in bucks and live in a frickin mansion.
S showed me to the bathroom, or maybe I should say *a* bathroom, that was bigger than my bedroom. It had a huge shower, and a jacuzzi/tub and was otherwise gorgeous. She had me strip and wait until she came back. She said she had to get some things, and then made a joke about being in a relationship where she spent more time in the bathroom than the bedroom.
It was just a joke, but it made me feel naughty. The juices started to flow as I stood their waiting.
A few minutes later she came back with some plastic grocery bags and the fun began.
She had me kneel in the tub on my hands and knees and began with some ass play. Just fingers at first. Then she pushed something cold and soft in. And another. And another. She told me not to look. Then I had to push them out. I heard them drop one at a time into a bowl. She pushed the bowl over to my face and told me to eat up.
Grapes. That had been in my ass.
I don't really know if she gets her ideas from the internet, but I love them anyway. I picked one up and popped it in my mouth, but she scolded me. "No fingers." I sucked the rest of the grapes up using only my mouth. One at a time I ate them up.
She repeated it with something larger. She pushed four of them into my ass, then had me push them out into the bowl. Then she put the bowl in front of my face.
Cherries. Real cherries, not the syrup covered fake super red kind.
I ate them up (no fingers!) and spit the seed back into the bowl.
Of course the next things were bigger. Into my ass... this time I could feel the stretching. Pushing them out ... again the stretching, but the pushing was more difficult. I had to work a little pass them. Into the plate and in front of my face.
Plums. Getting them out of the bowl without using my fingers was a challenge. I needed to sort of bite into them and then suck them in.
The next things into my ass ended up being squishy. Well, more like they got squished. They were bigger than the plums, but ended up get mushed on the way in, and probable more mushed on the way out.
Peaches. Mushed up and dirty. You could only sort of tell where the other fruits had been. With the peaches you could REALLY tell. I knew I wasn't just eating peach. You know what I mean.
All of this was fantastic. It made me feel horribly filthy, of course, but I was really on fire with anticipation. Each time I knew that whatever was next was going to be bigger. I was looking forward to the stretching going in, and the straining pushing out, and the filthiness of having to eat it.
And the experience wasn't unpleasant, but I knew it was filthy. I mean, it was fruit. Fruit tastes pretty good, not like piss. But I *knew* where it had been.
The next thing in my ass was huge. Just fucking huge. It tore me up going in. Ripped me apart going out. I was in a lot of pain, screaming, crying a little. Pushing it out was an incredible effort. It took a long time and I thought I might not be able to do it.
S put it back in again. More pain. More effort. More tears. I screamed and groaned to push it out.
And she put it back in again. It was pure torture. I had achieved I kind of physical misery that I'd never known before. Pushing it out was hell. Pure hell.
"All done?" she asked me. Her voice, as always, was playful. I was sobbing.
"Again," I said. I don't know why I said it. Ok, I sort of know why. I love the misery. How can I enjoy misery and pain? I don't know.
In again. Out again. I ask for more.
In again. Out again. This time I tell her I'm done.
It's an apple. I can only lie on my face and stare at it.
S tells me to let her know when I'm ready. I just wait, unmoving, staring at my apple. I feel oddly numb. Time passes. I don't know how long. I tell her I'm ready for more.
She pushed something into my ass. It's not fruit. It's long and hard and smooth. I feel a release of cold liquid into my ass. The tube slides effortlessly out. There's a pause. And then back in again. I feel another release. My ass is filling with cold liquid.
She puts the tube in front of my mouth. "Turkey baster!" she sings. She makes me kiss it and suck it. I still have an ass full of what I now know is milk. I can taste it on the baster.
"Now, let's see if this works," she says. The baster goes back into my ass and back out. She brings it back to my mouth, half filled with milk. She squirts the milk into my mouth and a drink it.
Ass milk. I love it. We're laughing. We play with the baster some more. It's filthy, dirty play, in a lot of ways. It's less of a mess than what we did with the bowl on Friday, but it's still a mess.
S declares food time over, and starts working her fingers into my ass. A few fingers soon becomes her whole fist, which I hear her pop in and out.
"Push it deep as it can go," I beg her. She obliges. Deep. Deep. Very Deep. Not as painful as the apple, and incredibly satisfying.
I kiss and lick and suck her dirty hand and fingers. I rub my face and cheeks against the filth. I am on fire. I have a deep burning need for filth and service.
Somehow she knows. She just gets this look that says she knows. She turns around and leans over the side of the jacuzzi and orders me to tongue her ass. I dive in with enthusiasm, trying to stick my tongue as deep in as it can because I'm filthy, while trying to work it around as much as I can just to please her.
She has me switch to her pussy. Back to her ass. Back to her pussy. This goes on for a long time. I am in heaven, yet craving more use and filth.
She turns around, still sitting on the edge of the tub. She tells me to start fingering her pussy. She looks deep into my eyes.
"I'm not sure I can do this," she says. She has me wait. Tells me to open my mouth and get ready. I know what's coming and I know how hard it is for her to do. We wait. The anticipation is driving me crazy.
A stream of piss bursts out of her and into my face. It strikes me like an orgasm. I have to move to get my mouth around it. Most of it goes all over my face and down my chest, but I swallow some of it.
"Thank you," I tell her when I'm done. "Thank you for everything."
She laughs and tells me to make her cum. I bury my face in her pussy and work her as best as I can. I'm giving her as much pleasure as possible, sucking and licking. My hair is wrapped tight in her hand. She practically rips my scalp off when she cums.
I am so happy to have pleased her.
I have tears of joy. I have never had tears of joy. WTF? But I'm just so damn happy.
Our eyes meet and we just smile.
First she says we need to clean up. Then she says "wait. cum first and then clean up."
I lean back in the tub, kneeling in a puddle of her piss, covered in all kinds of filth. May ass is sore and I'm the happiest girl alive. I make myself cum. Not for myself, but for her. I give her a show that I think will please her. Her smile and laugh are heavenly.
And then we clean up. I eat the apple as we put everything away and scrub the tub so there's no evidence. When that's all done, we step into the shower together and wash each other down, followed by long, sweet, gentle love. I don't care at all for myself. I don't even cum. I just want to please her.
Her cell phone rings. It's just an alarm she set. We've been playing for four hours. We have to get out of the house before her family comes back.
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Can anyone suggest so totally filthy and deviant sex acts? S has asked me to do some "research" and make a "wish list."
I like it so much better when she comes up with things. She's so good at it.
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"Friday, I own you," she told me.
It kept me wondering, dreaming, fantasizing, and horny for a couple days, waiting for friday to come. I had no idea what S had in mind, or if she had anything in mind at all, but she's been so good to me so far. She makes an effort to satisfy me, yet dominate me all at the same time.
She texted me Thursday night to save my morning piss of Friday. So I just stayed in bed until I heard her buzz to be let in the building. It's easier not to pee when I'm just lying in bed, but if I get up it's almost impossible.
I buzz he in and wait until she gets to the door and then let her in. I'm naked, having just gotten out of bed. I haven't even had a shower.
I love answering the door naked. It makes me feel incredibly sexy, or maybe sexual. I know that I'm being visited for sex, which is part of it. But I think it's really about knowing that my function is to supply sex. Sex is my purpose. My use. I am a sex toy. Knowing THAT makes me feel sexy.
But I really have to pee. My bladder feels like it's about to explode with a morning piss that I've been holding in. I practically beg S to let me go. She digs into her backpack and pulls out a sports bottle and tells me to pee in that. The top is narrower than a glass, which makes it a little tough, but I just have to hold it a little closer to avoid it going all over. I fill the bottle up easy and force myself to stop (which is not so easy). S puts the top on the bottle and tells me we're saving it for later. I'm intrigued. She sends me into the bathroom to finish my morning pee.
When I come out from the bathroom S gives me a man's white tank top, like a guy might wear under a dress shirt. It's big enough to be a small dress for me, although it's fairly open under the armpits. I can tell from how it's hanging that someone could view my tits from the side.
"Time to have some fun," S says and pulls some scissors out of her bag. She starts cutting up the top. Several long slits on the right side, almost all the way to the top and down to the bottom. She cuts a large hole over my left hip, exposing a space over my pussy and my left butt cheek. She cuts a triangle over my belly button. Some large holes in the back. Some strips here and there. She makes a single cut down from the neckline between my boobs.
I'm practically wearing rags. Her cuts are carefully designed to advertise that I'm not wearing underwear and show off parts of me that aren't usually seen, while still hiding my nipples and pussy. On the other hand, it is possible to see my tits and pussy if you're looking at the right angle.
And of course, it's all fun. She's talking the whole time, making little comments like "we need to show off there" or "let's make sure people can see that." She laugh. I laugh. I adore her. When she wants to show me off, I want to be shown off, just to please her... Well, that and I love being shown off.
She decides that the top is shredded enough and that it's time to go, so we leave. I'm wearing nothing but the cut up top - no shoes, nothing. We walk down to her car. Somehow this top feels more exposed than wearing nothing, if that makes any sense at all.
We get in the car and she starts driving. She tells me that she read on the internet somewhere (she loves the internet!) that public play is best down away from home. Somewhere where you won't get caught by people you know, of that if you do get caught it won't get back to anyone, like if your name is in the paper or something. S is so smart. I realize that streaking around my neighborhood and apartment complex is probably not all that bright.
We drive for around an hour and pull into a park. She has me get out of the car, then reaches into he bag to pull out a leash and collar. Nothing fancy, just an ordinary dog collar you can buy at the pet store. The leash is a chain though, which I find very sexy. The flip is switched - I am slutwhoregoddess. When she puts the collar on I am slutwhoregoddess times 10.
She has me turn around. She pulls my hands behind my back and puts them in handcuffs.
"There's not real," she says. They're only plastic and I could probably bust out of them in 2 seconds, but it doesn't matter. I am on a leash, handcuffed, wearing rags, barefoot, and in public! I'm incredibly excited. I could cum right then and there, but we haven't even started.
She takes me on a walk through the park, pulling me by the leash. There are plenty of people there who walk past us. I get stares. We get stares. I am totally on fire.
I'm also sweating like a pig because it's so hot and humid. I feel beads of sweat dripping down my skin, and am vaguely aware of my rags clinging to me. I am miserable, humiliated, and loving it. I keeping thinking about having to go down on my knees to lick S's pussy, or made to service strangers, or having her reach up under the rags to make me cum while others watch. My legs start to feel wobbly. I feel like I might actually cum while just walking.
We walk forever. I can't keep track of time because my thoughts are all about sex. I'm also melting in the heat. I feel my pussy throbbing, if that's possible. Maybe I'm imaginging it.
We stop at a bench by a path. S has me kneel down, which is not all that easy since I"m handcuffed. I manage somehow, but I almost fall over.
"Need a drink?" she taunts me. She's holding up that sports bottle filled with my piss. I say yes, and she starts squirting it in my mouth. It's not steamy hot piss anymore, but it's still warm because it's so hot out. Somehow the temperature makes it's more disgusting than usual. I gag on it, but of course I love it.
"Let me know when you want more," she says, in a playful sing-song.
She feeds a banana to me, which draws some big-eyed stares from people walking or jogging by. Ever couple of bites she washes it down with another squirt from the sports bottle. This is awful and wonderful. My arms and legs are trembling with sexual excitement. I feel like I"m going to explode. The cuffs are driving me CRAZY because I can't reach around and touch myself, which I desperately need to do.
When the banana is gone, she pulls out a paper plate and sets it on the ground. She dumps some grapes on it and tells me to eat them up. I bend over to eat them, but it's just damn hard with my hands behind my back. I have to bend over, such one into my mouth, and then sit up to eat it. My stomache muscles start getting sore from the effort. It' feels like I've done 2 million sit ups.
Of course every time I bend forward that shreded top flops open, expsoing my tits. It doesn't really right itself when I sit up either. Sometimes one of my tits is totally exposed when I sit up. There aren't that many people around, but those that are get a good view.
I feel like such a sex slave. I cannot think of any other word to describe it. Just thinking about it is an amazing turn on (I've been reliving it in fantasies it all day).
It starts to rain. If you wear anywhere in eastern PA, you know the rain I'm talking about. It caught us totally off guard. It started light, so we stuck around a bit, but then it turned nasty. We started heading back to the car, but got drenched pretty quickly. My rags clung to me, but also stretched out from the weight of the water. I was very exposed - between holes and see-through wet white materal.
"I can't take it anymore," I said. She told me I had to walk back. She didn't have any other clothes for me and the car was aways away, but it wasn't what I mean. The whole thing was too much. I was too turned on to go any further. I was begging, but it wasn't a game or play. I NEEDED to cum.
There was nobody around. Everyone had run from the rain. We were along in the park.
S unhooked my handcuffs and had me take off my rags and throw them on the ground. I stood there naked, in the rain, wearing only my leash and collar. She had me sit down in wet grass, spreak my legs, and start playing with my pussy.
I could have cum instantly, which I think she realized. She made me stop playing with my pussy and playing with my tits instead. She made me play with them for what seemed like forever, and then let me play with my pussy. I came, there on the grass. It was surreal, with that miserable storm pounding me, and underneath that dark sky, but I couldn't stop myself.
When I was done she made me crawl on the grass for awhile, which I did on my hands and knees. Then she made me crawl on my belly, pulling myself along using just my arms. She had me sit up.
She grabbed the sport bottle of piss from her bag. It was about 3/4 empty, but there was still some in there. She opened the top and paused. I think she was thinking about whether she shoudl do what she was about to do. But she did it. She thrust her arm forward and splashed the rest of the piss right into my face. It was a shock, even though I was already wet. It stung my eyes. Burned my nose. And then there was a moment of release somehow. My face sort of stung, but I loved that.
"You have to do that to me again!" I said. Or something like that. It was an incredible rush.
We burst out laughing. She reaches out a hand to help me stand up and then we start walking back to the car. I grab my rag, but don't bother putting it on. Nobody is out here and I love being naked outdoors. The thing isn't going to cover much anyway. We walk back to the car with her still holding my leash.
There's no cars in the parking area. We're the only ones there. I get in the car, and lose the leash and collar. I ride back to my apartment naked, which just feels so right, so natural to me. I belong naked. In public, in private. Always, but especially when S is around, because I exist for her pleasure.
We get back to the apartment and I help S out of her wet clothes. That leads to an afternoon of gentle lovemaking, which I know is what S truly wants. I try to give her exactly what I know she needs. She has given me so much that I owe her. It's late in the afternoon before we stop.
My mother will be home soon.
"You're so good to me," I tell her. I then go on and on about how wonderful that morning was. She kisses me lightly. Pauses. And then pushes me off her and slaps my ass.
"C'mon, we need to give your ass some attention before I go."
The ass attention is heavenly. She starts with her fingers (which find there way into my mouth several times, of course) and then starts stuffing the chain from the leash into my ass. It's cold, bumpy, scratchy, and delightful. When she pulls it out the feeling is amazing. We repeat it several times. At some point she stuff the chain half in my ass, and uses the leather strat to whip my ass, and my pussy. I take parts of the chain ass to mouth.
"Am I dirty enough for you?" she asks out of nowhere. I tell her she's wonderful, but she isn't convinced. I tell her that if she WAS dirtier I wouldn't mind, but that I really enjoy everything. She should use me as she wants, in any way she wants. We sit for a few minutes staring in each other's eyes.
"Ok.. this is for you..." she says, and grabs me by the hair, pulling me off the bed into the bathroom. She tells me to wait, and then comes back with a glass.
"Let's hope I can do this," she says.
She puts the glass between her legs and breaths deep. She pauses. Makes some faces. "This is harder than i thought."
"You don't have to," I tell her, but I want her to, very, very, VERY much. She does. She fills the glass with her piss. I want it so much, I feel my mouth watering. I'm such a sick fuck.
"Ok, hold on," she says and sets the glass on the sink.
She has me turn around and grab my ankles. Then she starts working my ass again. She's rough, and seems determined to stretch me good. It hurts so good. And then it happens...
I feel liquid being poured into my ass. It's her piss. I want to explode. It also burns like hell.
"oh my god!" I scream. It's a good scream. I want to know where she got that idea. "Internet?" she says coyly. I laugh, but am trying hard not to spill anything out of my ass.
"Fuck, what does it look like? " I ask. "Is it a pool? Can you see it? Is it all in there?"
She just starts laughing, but I can't move. She says to hold on, leaves, and comes back with a bowl. She has me stand up slowly, so the piss pours out of my ass and into the bowl. Short story - it's a mess.
S is laughing, joking about how she's got piss all over her arms.
"Ok, bowl of ass-piss, glass of piss," she says, gesturing to the to. "I bet you want to drink this," she says giving me the bowl.
I eagerly slurp it down. I lower the bowl and ...SPLASH... the glass of piss does right into my face, catching me totally off guard.
I scream fuck about 20 times. I shake it off.
"Is that filthy enough for you," she laughs at me.
I laugh back at her. "It's a start." I promise that I'll do that any time and that I'm totally enjoying myself. It's not a lie. I love how she surprised me... something about it is just so... wrong. Maybe even abusive.
We clean up the bathroom, then shower together. I've never showered with anyone before. She shower turns into silly soapy sex play, and then soft lovemaking.
We get out of the shower, giggling, laughing, wet, naked, ...
And my mom is there. When the FUCK did she come home? I want to die. Then S starts laughing. I start laughing. We retreat into my room. I give S some of my clothes (something modest) to wear home, and she leaves.
It's been a whole day since and mom hasn't said a word about it.
Awkward!
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Where to begin ...
I felt that I needed to see J. It had been almost a week since the last time I'd seen him. That time with his friend that should have been so great but turned out kind of awful. I didn't want to just not see J ever again without telling him why. And it's not really like there's a why either. I'm still on good terms with J.
It's just that every time I close my eyes, I'm thinking of S. Sometimes when my eyes are open too.
And that's a problem. Seeing S without telling J (I don't want to use the word behind) is no big deal. On the other hand, seeing J without telling S is a big deal. I would be going behind S there. The two are not equal in my mind. Even though I've known S for less than a week, she takes priority over J.
I call S and talk it over with her. She says it's fine to see J, which I almost don't want to hear. I want her to tell me I'm not allowed - not because I don't want to see J but because I want S to not want to share me. I'm sure now where my heart lies. I will miss J and his cock, but I'm making the decision to devote myself to only S.
I don't tell S though. If she rejects me, I will die.
S tells me to have a good time with J, and she even tells me to wear the shirt she made for me. "I bet he'll like it," she laughs. Everything is laughter with S.
"But Friday you are mine, got it? Friday, I OWN you," she says. I think she's only joking, but those are the best words ever. It's everything I want, in ways beyond what I'm sure she means.
I spend the night tossing and turning and not sleeping, and head over to J's the next morning. That's this morning. I'm wearing S's shirt, like she told me, and some nice, sexy shorts. I realize that while I'm wearing the shirt, I'm thinking about S, and I wonder if she planned that. Making sure I've got her on my mind when I'm with J.
J opens the door and seems surprised to see me. He says something about not being sure if I was coming back. I tell him that this is probably the last time. I blab something stupid about school coming up. I sound like an idiot. He doesn't seem to care and says something about making the morning memorable.
He says he likes my shirt, which immediately starts me thinking about S. He wants to take my shorts off, but leave the shirt on. Damn you S! Did you plan that?
No ... not damn her. But you know what I mean.
I'm down on my knees sucking his cock, taking it deep as it can go. My nose is rubbing up against his crotch, just the way he likes it. He's pulling my hair and it's gradually getting rougher. Soon he's giving my throat a nice rough fuck, they way we both like it. I'm keeping my hands at my sides the way I'm supposed to.
I'm enjoying it, and thinking how much I'm going to miss sucking cock. I try to make it as good as possible, although there's really not much for me to do since J's controlling it all.
He pushes his dick all the way down and just holds it there. Then he pinches my nose closed. There's a WTF moment until I realize what's going on. I've HEARD of choking play, but don't really know much about it. I was about to learn. I was nervous, but it also excited. The switch was flipped. The rest of the world melted away, and I was slutwhoregoddess. I'm just a filthy fucktoy who willing does anything .. and loves it.
After a few seconds I reached up to pull he hands away. I needed to breath, but he told me - firmly - to keep my hands down. I put them down, even though I felt like I was desperate to breath. He called me a good slut and pulled his cock out. I started gasping for air.
He told me to let me know when I was ready for me. After catching my breath I just nodded, and wordlessly went back to sucking his cock. There was a couple of deep thrusts down my throat, and then he held one down there. He pinched my nose again. After a few moments I was desperate for air again. He must have been able to tell, because he said something about a couple more seconds... I struggled... his cock game out, and I was gasping for air again.
I totally can't explain it, but I loved it. It's like drinking piss, maybe. It's an awful thing to do and experience, but it's a turn on. It's wrongness is a turn on. Being a girl who participates in something so wicked and deviant makes me sexually powerful. I am the ultimate fantasy. I'm beyond the ultimate fantasy. I'm the ultimate reality.
I go back again ... and again ...and I don't know how many times I go back. I lose count. I haven't said a word the whole time. I just keep going back. Each time I go without air a little bit longer...
I'm not really sure what happened, ok? I can't say I remember it clearly.
But then I'm on my hands and knees, gasping desperately for air. That last time must have been really extreme (I figure)... I look up at J and realize... something.
I realize that I could die. But it's more than that. I realize that I would WILLINGLY die. He could kill me right there, and I would simply let him. In fact, I've already given him permission but not stopping along the way.
I'm still on my hands and knees and realizing that being a girl who does anything, never saying no, is a scary thing. Maybe a stupid thing. If J brought in 20 guys to rape me I would let him. If he warned me a week in advance, I would show up anyway. If he told me that he was going to kill me after, I would still show up. That's stupid, but I would do it. When sex is involved, I cannot control myself.
I look up at J again. If he wanted to take a hot knife and circumcise my clit, inflicting terrible agony on my most sensitive part, and making me unable to feel pleasure again, I would let him. In fact, I would welcome it. In fact, somehow I find myself FANTASIZING about it. Yes, I have rape fantasies too. I am a sick fuck.
Maybe I've been quiet for too long or something, but J asks me if I'm all right. I tell him I'm fine and to make the morning memorable. It's his last chance. He asks if I have anything special I want to do and I tell him to just have his way with me. I repeat some of his dirtiest fantasies to him. Thinking about them is enough to bring me back from almost dead from suffication to dirty filthy whore. After a couple of fantasies, I'm on fire again, ready for some serious kink.
He takes me to the bedroom and tosses me on the bed. I'm on my back. He tapes my right wrist to my right ankle with packing tape, and does the same on the left. Another couple of pieces of tape cover up my pussy. He clamps a pants hanger to my nipples and starts playing with it... pulling and twisting. He sees how far he can stretch my tits, and then yanks the hanger off. We repeat this a couple of times, then he leaves the hanger on.
He rips the tape off my pussy, and then retapes it. He yanks the hanger off my tits then puts it back. Then rips the tape off my pussy. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Tits. Pussy. Tits. Pussy. Then he leaves me there clamped and taped and plenty sore.
He comes back with a bottle of corona, unopened. He asks me if I know what it's for and I say "oh yea." I'm looking forward to it. He starts working my ass with his fingers and compliments me on how stretched I am. He works my ass for a good long time with his fingers, bringing them to my face to lick and suck once in a while.
He lubes up the bottle and starts working it into my ass. It's cold and the stretching is intense. But it really goes in rather easily. He leaves it there.
He untapes my pussy.
He asks me if I know what this means. I know what it means, but I don't want to think about it. We made a promise weeks ago. When I can deep throat him and touch my nose to his crotch, and take a corona bottle fat end first in my ass, he will fuck me for real. He will take my virginity. Now it's time.
I pretend to forget, although I try to tease as best I can. He reminds me of the promise and tells me it's time.
I'm really uncertain. I would let him kill me. Didn't I just think that?
I'm on his bed, my wrists bound to my ankles in a very vulnerable position. I have a pants hanger clamped on my nipples and a corona bottle shoved in my ass. This is how we planned it. This is how I FANTASIZED about it. This is how I'm going to lose my virginity.
He asks me something. Am I ready? Are we going to do this? Something. I don't even remember what.
"No. I can't." I hear myself say.
You can kill me, but not fuck me for real.
He says no problem. He pulls me around so I'm sideways on the bed, with my head hanging down off the edge. I'm on my back with my arms and legs in the air, just like before: taped, clamped, bottled.
He shoves he cock in my throat and fucks it HARD. His balls are bouncing on my face. I think this is deeper than when I'm sitting on my knees before him. He pushes DEEP in me when he cums, and YANKS the pants hanger off my tits at the moment of his orgasm.
It's really hard not to scream and bite his dick off. Suddenly I want to laugh, and all I can think about is S.
J pulls his cock from my through.
My tits are way sore.
He untapes my wrists and ankles and tells me to play with myself. he says he wants me to cum with that bottle deep in my ass. I'm sore everywhere, but I'm also feeling good. Hot kinky sex is hot kinky sex. It turns me on and drives me wild no matter what the circumstances. If you've been reading along, you know that.
I happily, eagerly, and easily make myself cum. I do enjoy it, even though my thoughts for the whole time have been somewhere else.
He pops the bottle out of my ass, quickly and someone roughly. It's a painful relief.
He asks me if I want more. I tell him I'm here as long as he wants me, but once I'm gone I'm gone. He better use me while he can.
He says he needs to go to work soon, so it will be quick.
He opens the beer and tells me to chug it... not easy with a lubed up bottle that just came out of my ass. Confession: despite being a sex freak, I haven't done much drinking. Chugging a warm beer from a slimy, stinking, bottle is not easy, but I manage. He gets me a glass and tells me to piss it all out.
I smile. I knew that was coming as soon as he told me to drink the beer. I love the kink. I love the filth. And yes, I love drinking piss.
It takes a couple seconds to get started, but I fill the glass no problem and hold it up to him, still smiling. I feel a little inspired and hold the glass up to my face and rub my cheek against it. He has me drink it. I finish up with an loud "aaaahhhhh!" I'm smiling and laughing, and suddenly having a great time.
"Anything else? Last chance," I tell him. I'm practically singing. "I can be your toilet, fuck your friends, you name it! Got a sheep in the closet? How about a pony? Want to cut off my tits and save them as a memento?"
I jiggle my tits at him.
He laughs. It's the first time I've ever heard J laugh.
"You're a crazy slut." He tells me, still laughing. "Get out of here!"
"Do I get dressed or just get out of here?"
"No, just leave. Don't ever come back."
We're both laughing like crazy as I pick up my things, and walk out the door naked.
"Fuck you." I tell him as I leave.
"Fuck you, you piss drining whore!" He slams the door behind me, but I can hear him laughing on the other side. I laugh all the way home.
And yes, I walk home naked.
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S was fantastic yesterday.
She showed up at my apartment at 9:15. I answered the door naked. I knew it was her since I had to buzz her in, so it wasn't like anyone was going to see me. I hadn't even bothered to get dressed that morning though, since I knew she was coming.
There she was, in the doorway wearing a white blouse unbuttoned down to the bottom. I was surprised, but I like it. I didn't think she had it in her. She mentioned something about "just two buttons."
I love her smile. And he laugh. She's always smiling and laughing. Everything with her is a good time.
She comes in and says "I brought ice cream," holding up a bag to show me. I asked her how she got out of the house dressed like that. She tells me she dressed normal at home, then took her bra off in the car while sitting at a light. "Was that before or after buying the ice cream?" I ask.
She has her arms around me and our faces are inched apart when she answers. "Before." She kisses me lightly. "I thought you'd like it that way." "For real?" I ask. "What do you think?"
She's such a flirt. And today she is so ... strong. No, the word is confident. She seemed timid before, but today she is confident.
We go into the bedroom with the ice cream. I undress her the grab a couple towels and a spoon. She's on her back while I play with her and the ice cream. I scoop it only her tits, her belly, her pussy. She screams that it's freezing! I let it melt some. I lick it off. I feed her some. We play like that for a long time. It's very sexy, but it's just a good time. While we play we talk ... not sex talk but girl talk .. like we're catching up.
She says it's my turn. She grabs me and pushes me onto my back. She's being strong and aggressive, which is really working for me. Then it's my turn to feel the ice cream on my body. She's a tease, starting at my neck of all places, and slowly working down. I'm on fire. I can't wait for her to get to my pussy, but the closer she gets to more she seems to avoid it. When she starts scooping ice cream onto my hips I'm starting to freak out.
She licks the ice cream off my hips, and then starts teasing my pussy with the spoon. And she's a smiles and laughs. Finally some ice cream hits my clit .. and DAMN! that IS cold. LOL. She rubs it on my pussy, then licks and sucks me all clean. Soon I'm coming from the attention.... a short, normal orgasm.
I feel bad about not giving her an orgasm. She tells me she can make it up to me by giving her a massage. I'm confused at first, but when she lays face down, clutching a pillow, with her ass up in the air, I remember what she said the other day... when my tongue was in her ass it was like having a massage in her ass.
"You're different today." I tell her. "I'm just starting to figure you out, that's all." She says.
I pull her ass cheeks wide and dive in with my tongue, swirling it around, and trying to push it deep as I can. She has a content look on her face. She's relaxed and enjoying herself.
I start playing with her pussy while I'm tonguing her. I want her to cum. I'm working it inside and out and she's getting very wet. Really wet. Soaking, gushing wet. It's turning me on, but I try not to think about myself. I finally make her cum.
She rolls over and smiles at me. I lay down beside her and we start kissing and gently fooling around. "I'll never get used to that," she says. I ask her what and she says kissing me after I've been tonguing her ass. We giggle and laugh, then she sits up. She turns me over, slaps my ass, and tells me to assume the position. I obey playfully, sticking my ass straight into the air.
She doesn't need directions or guidance this time. In fact, it feels like she's "in charge" while she plays with my ass. She does know exactly what I want. She fingers and stuffs and stretches my ass, every now and then pulling her fingers out and sticking them in my mouth to lick and suck. And she's always smiling and laughing and giggling. This isn't dirty porno sex like J, it's fun girlie sex.
She works me for some time and the just stops. "Well, be proud of yourself. I've got my whole hand in there. All the way to the wrist." I'm shocked. Shocked that she did it, but also sex-shocked somehow. That little switch inside me got flipped again - the switch that raises me from one level of horny to another. "What made you think of doing that?" I ask. "There's this thing called the Internet. It has nothing but porn on it."
I try to turn around and look, but I really can't. I SO want to see it. The she pops .. literally, i hear a "pop" .. her hand out of my ass. She pushes it back in and pops it out several times, and laughs at me some more. "That's a big hole you've got there. It's not closing up."
She tells me she needs to go wash up, but I tell her to wait. I reach out and grab her arm, then sit up. Her hand is dirty. You know the kind of dirt I mean. Just a little, not a lot, but it's there.
I lick it and suck it clean, making sure to get ever dirty bit. Slutwhoregoddess is in da house! And I need to show S how filthy I am. I need to share that with her.
"You really do do anything," she laughs at me again. She kisses me and tells me she really does need to wash up. "You can play with your pussy while you wait," she tells me and then runs off to the bathroom.
I lean back and do just what she said .. start playing with my pussy. A few minutes later she comes back and starts watching me from the door. She's just watching, looking confident. Triumphant. With a huge grin on her face.
"Cum for me," she says. It's not a whisper. It's strong. Like a command.
I work myself harder and faster. Play with my nipples with my other hand. My mouth is hanging open and I'm just looking into her eyes. I cum... loudly... and she just stands there looking victorious.
She comes over and plants a kiss on my lips, but doesn't join me on the bed. She says we should go grab some lunch. She slaps my tit, then moves off to get dressed.
I'm really starting to like her slaps. They're so well-timed. Like exclamation points at the end of her sentences.
She's all dressed while I'm still fumbling for clothes. "Just two buttons," she teases me as she fixes her blouse. I just grab some shorts and a t-shirt to be quick. I feel like she's in a hurry and I'm slowing her down.
She puts her arms around me from behind. We're standing in front of my mirror. I like how we look together. It's not just sexy, but romantic. Then it strikes me, we have romance. Not just sex, but romance. I turn around to kiss her, but keep an eye on the mirror.
"How much do you like this top?" she asks. I ask why and she says that she thinks it's too big. She has me get some scissors. I give them too her, and then she turns me to face the mirror. She takes the scissors and starts cutting my shirt up from the bottom. I can feel the blade on my side. It's exciting somehow. Dangerous. Sexy.
She stops cutting up close to my midriff, then starts cutting across, making me a little half shirt, cutting across the front first, then the back. The blade on my back is alarmingly exciting.
"A little bit shorter, I think." She goes around a second time. When she's done the shirt is so short that my tits hang out of the bottom.. just a little bit, but enough. She cuts off the sleeves and widens the armpits. She opens up the collar, which drives me wild.. the scissors sliding across my neck is heavenly. She cuts a small triangle up from the bottom right between my tits.
"ok, now it's small enough."
There's barely anything left.
We walk to the coffee shop. On the way there I discover that this "small enough" shirt is really too small. As a move and jiggle my nipples fall out the bottom of the shirt, which then rides up even higher. I have to keep pulling it down to keep my tits from completely hanging out. It's another giggly, silly game for us. Sometimes I'm slow to fix my shirt.
When we get to the coffee shop, S gives me 20 bucks and tells me what to get her. I go to the counter while she gets a table. The shop is pretty busy because it's lunch time. My shirt is riding up the whole time.
When the order is done, I discover why she sent me to buy lunch. It's impossible for me to carry anything while dealing with my shirt. As I carry our food back to the table, my shirt slides way up, forcing me to walk around with my tits hanging out.
"nice shirt," she says when I finallly sit down. "you did that deliberately," i tell her. "Oh yeah," she flirts.
We eat, talk, laugh. And then it's back home and straight to the bedroom. We take off each other's clothes and then start gently fooling around. This seems more like S... sweet, tender lovemaking. Gentle touches and caresses. Light kisses. We work our way into a 69, side by side. We stop after what must be at least an hour, even though neither of us has cum.
We sit up and hold each other, just talking. "So Anything Girl," she says. she tells me she wants to know what "anything" really means. I'm nervous, and start to tell her some stuff, then I confess that I have a journal here. She wants to see it. She starts reading and then gets a smile.
"read it to me," she says. I'm stunned, so I start reading my last entry, the one about her. "No, start at the begining."
I go back to my first entry and start reading it out loud to her. She doesn't seem phased when I get to the part about the piss drinking, which is something I was really nervouse about. It goes by and I feel a tremendous relief when she isn't grossed out. I start the second entry, much more relaxed. S is making jokes about making myself cum in J's car, but they're good jokes. We're both enjoying the story... and getting steamed up.
While I'm reading the third story, S tells me to start playing with myself. I'm surprised, but pleased. She's being such a leader today, which I really like. I finally get what she meant by "I'm starting to figure you out." Maybe she has figured me out.
As I finger myself, I realize that I'm hornier than I though. Reliving those times with J has me completely on fire. It's a total struggle to read, but S keeps encouraging me. I start to cum, but she maked me keep reading... here's the part where I was cumming ...
(damn this site won't let me cut and paste!)
"I'm your piss drinking slut."
"I'm your ass fucking slut."
"I'm your whore."
"I love to drink my piss."
I force the words out one at a time as a cum, and then she lets me stop. I fall into her, satisfied. We kiss and cuddle. She lets me rest a bit, then makes me read out the rest of that entry. It was a long one. By the end I'm incredibly horny again.
"you really do do anything," she says.
"yes," i tell her. I start rambling, saying things like I hope she isn't offended or grossed out, and telling her how i want to do anything for her, and just tell me.
She stops me by putting two fingers to my lips. We kiss and cuddle gently.
"ok, show me," she says. I don't know what she means. "get a glass and show me." "you mean...?" "yeah, I want to see it."
I go to the kitchen and get a big glass of water. I've learned that it's easier after drinking a glass of water. I chug it down, then lower the glass between my legs and release. The glass fills up with my piss, which I nervously bring to my mouth.
I'm nervous. I don't remember ever being this nervous. I realize that I'm afraid S won't want to be with me anymore after seeing this. I drinking it all, steadily and slowly.
I look up at her.
"Thank you," I say.
"For what?"
"Thank you for letting me do that and ... not judging me."
"Do what?" She says. Her voice is firm, but she's smiling. It's a game to her.
"Thank you for letting me drink my piss."
"Again."
"Thank you for letting me drink my piss."
"Good girl.... no Good Bitch."
J never called me Bitch. The word seems perfect coming from S though.
"Thank you."
"Say you're good bitch."
"I'm a good bitch."
"A good piss drinking bitch."
"I'm a good piss drinking bitch."
I'm on fire. She gets off the bed and has me kneel before her. She grabs the back of my head and pushes me hard into her pussy.
"Make me cum bitch." she says. I love those words. I work hard at making her cum. For the next several minutes it's the only reason for my existence. I existed to satisfy her.
I make her cum, we go back to the bed. "Good bitch," she adds as an afterthough - smiling, giggling, laughing.
"I'm glad you figured me out," i tell her.
"It's not easy," she says. She confesses that it's all very different for her. She never really thought of sex this way, but she's having fun. She doesn't really spell it out, but I get the feeling that she's just doing this for me, trying really hard to be the lover I want.
"I have to spend more time on the internet," she says. We laugh. We giggle. We talk. We kiss. We caress.
We spend the rest of the afternoon on the bed, just making love lightly... the way I know is more natural for her. She's worked hard to give me what i need, so I have to put my needs aside and give her what she does. I get it now.
We don't make plans to meet again, but I have her cell number, and her e-mail - things I've never been able to share with J. Call me, she says. She's dressed ("two buttons") but I'm standing naked in the living room.
She kisses me on the cheek and whispers in my ear. "Wear that shirt for me tomorrow. Go out for lunch. And go find someplace to make yourself cum." "Yes," I whisper. "When you cum say my name." "Yes." "And when you're done tell yourself you've been a good bitch." "Thank you," I tell her. "I'll do that."
And that's where I'm off to go now....
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So I did spend Saturday with S. Today I am alone - no S, no J. I miss them both horribly, but it's really S that's on my mind.
S gives me something that J can't - a relationship. I know, two days isn't a relationship, but it has been given me some things that J can't. S and I can go out together in public, for one, not just for play but as friends (partners?). And we can also just be friends. J is all sex, only sex. Kinky, filthy, wonderful sex, but nothing more.
I want them both. And when the thought of having both at the same time comes, I push it away, but it keeps on coming.
Saturday. I meet S at the mall. I am wearing my "front only" top. I don't know if it has a name. It's basically just a piece of cloth with straps that tie behind the neck at the top and another behind the back at the bottom. With it, I've got a small skirt, and no underwear of course.
S and I got into the bathroom where I give her some clothes. It's the white top from the day before that she really never got a chance to wear, and a skirt to go with it. She goes into a stall to change, which I think it pretty funny. The outfit pretty much shows all, so why change in private? Whatever. She comes out looking like a million bucks. "Only the bottom two buttons" she smiles at me.
I want to kiss her. I do. She's surprised at first.
We walk back into the mall, and talk about wear to put her old clothes. She says she'll put them in the car, so we walk out to the parking lot. We're turning heads and getting stares. I ask her how she feels and she says "exposed." It's not quite what I was hoping she'd say. I think she senses I was looking for something else, so she says "scared... excited."
We drop her clothes off in the car and the head back to the mall. She mentions that her outfit is more revealing that mine, so I whisper in her ear... "Sometime while we're here, sometime when I'm not expecting it, untie my top behind my neck so it falls off." She's like, really? And I assure her that it's what I want.
We both have a little more energy in our step after that.
We walk around the mall having giggly girl conversation. Mostly, I'm just having a good time with a friend. Yes, the sex thing is there. It's always there, especially when I see her boobs hanging out. I'm reminded of it every time I see somebody's eyes following us. I feel horny, but it's a silent buzz hiding behind everything else. It's everywhere, but not the main thing.
The conversation does turn a little sexy. We talk about boyfriends, so I confess to her I've involved with J, but I hope that doesn't change things between us. I try to explain that J is sex only, and probably over in a couple weeks. I tell her about how he's older so we never go out or anything because we don't want to be seen together in public. She understands and tells me that she hopes the two of us can stay together for awhile.
She confesses that she's never been with a girl before, and so do I. We compare sex lives, although I hold back pretty much everything I've ever done with J. I tell her about deep throat blow jobs and anal, and I hint that there's more but I don't give details. Somewhere along the lines I sort of confess that I just do anything he wants no matter what it is, and let her imagination do the rest.
"Anything?" "Yeah, anything." "Anything, anything?" "I never say no, ever."
We keep talking as we walk around the mall. The conversation keeps changing from movies to music to boys to sex to whatever. And then while I'm riding down an escalator, my top falls down in front of a group of boys riding up the other direction. She did it, and caught me totally buy surprise.
I turn around to face her, with a big grin on my face, my top hanging down and my tits hanging out. I make eye contact with S, who starts laughing. I start laughing too, but make no effort to cover myself. Once we reach the bottom of the escalator, and I walk away a few steps, I pull up my top and tie up the straps.
I want to kiss her again. I hesitate. Then I reach over and do it. We're making out in the mall, and causing a scene.
S tells me we're making too much of a scene, which I kind of agree with. If I could get naked and have sex with her right there with the whole world watching, I would, but I know that would get me into trouble that I don't want to be in. We leave the mall, and go to her car.
She just starts driving. I'm horny so I pull my top off .. completely off this time. I'm playing with my tits and pussy and just staring at S. She jokes about not be able to drive. I tell her to find a place to pull over then.
We talk about where to go for a long time, until we finally find one of the utility areas on the side of the road. She pulls in and we get out of the car. I'm still topless. I walk over to her, take her top off and toss it in the car, and then drag her by the hand behind the shed. It's more or less shielded from the road, but somebody probably saw us walk back there.
We kiss. We make out. We play with each others tits. I am on fire. I want her. It so different from being out by myself. When I'm out by myself, the fact that I'm naked outdoors is the turn on that drives me. The thought of getting caught excites me. Here, all of that is there, but in the background. I'm really just seeing nothing but her, and thinking about how much I want to be with her, and it's all just about her...
I've never felt like that. I don't feel like I'm describing it right. With J it's all about him, but it's about serving him, and being filthy and kinky. With S it's something else. I just can't keep my eyes off of her.
We're passionate. We're animals. We're sweating like pigs because it's fucking hot and humid. It's pure sex... no kink, no games, not much emotion either. Just a pure sex act. I stop cumming. I don't remember starting to cum, or much about what happened at all. I just realized that I've stopped cumming. I think I might have been screaming... I mean *really* screaming... but I don't remember it.
I can barely stand up. I'm sort of swaying, holding on S by leaning on her. Her hand is still between my legs, stroking me gently. "Did you cum?" I ask her. She nods. "I think you missed it." I'm really not sure what happened. "Was it .. mine .. another long one?" She tells me she thought all my orgasms were long ones and that she was supposed to just keep going.
We go back to the car and just sit in the seats for awhile. She turns the air on, but we don't go anywhere or put our tops on. The cool air on my chest feels really good in a totally non sexual way.
Well, a mostly non-sexual way.
We sit for awhile in silence, cooling off. Then we put our tops back on and she drives off.
"The bottom two buttons only," she flirts with me. "Promise me to undo my top a couple more times today," I flirt back. She says she will, when I least expect it, when a lot of people are around. I tell her I hope so, which is true. I totally want it.
We talk about where to go, and are stumped. Her place and my place are pretty much out because parents are home. We go to a restaurant to have ice cream. I get the feeling our waitress doesn't approve of our clothes, but doesn't say anything. For awhile we're just friends again, talking up a storm, but I can't stop looking at her chest, which is totally exposed to me since I'm sitting across from her. She notices, checks to make sure nobody is watching, and unbuttons one button.
Our waitress brings our ice cream. I lean over the table and whisper to S that I want to spread it all over her tits and pussy and lick it up. We talk dirty, and make a date for Monday afternoon. My place. She'll bring ice cream.
We finish up, pay, and leave. She still has only one button buttoned. I'm horny as hell. S is teasing me. Not verbally. Sexually. We make out a little in the parking lot. She stops and says we need to go somewhere more private. I agree.
As I turn around to walk toward my side of the car, I feel the stings on my top pull. My top falls down again. She did it too me again. I totally didn't expect it. I turn to her and smile. Then we both get into the car. I don't put my top back up until we're driving off.
We drive around some more, looking for another place to fool around. We find a park or something where nobody is around. We pull in, get out of the car, and head into the woods. She pulls at my top again as were crossing the field into the woods. This time it didn't surprise me, but I don't care. I take my top off the rest of the way and just carry it.
We go into the woods, find a spot, and get naked - which takes about two seconds since we're not wearing much. We start fooling around and end up in a 69 - my first 69 ever, boy or girl.
This time, we are not animals, but lovers. Loving, caring, trying to please. We're not rushing to orgasm. Instead it's about continuous physical pleasure... caresses. Bites. Licks. Pinches. Slaps.
I ask her to play with my ass. There's a brief awkward pause, and I start to regret saying it. She's not comfortable with it. I want to stab myself for ruining something wonderful with my need for kink. She sees I'm upset and says she's just not sure what to do. She wants me to tell her.
We kiss. Caress. I get down on hands and knees and start giving her directions to finger my ass. One finger, then two. Slide it in an out like she's fucking me. Swirl it around. Take the out and let me suck her fingers. Put them back. Push them deep as she can. Three fingers. Deeper. Deeper. Back to my mouth. Two fingers in. Three fingers. Four. Thrusting. Turning. Fucking. Feeling. Back to my mouth. Back to my ass. Back to my mouth. Back to my ass. Back to my mouth.
I'm sucking her fingers clean when I thank her for doing that. She's no problem. She thinks she can do that to me, but doesn't know if she could have that done to her. I tell her no problem. I tell her I'm the one with no limits, she doesn't have to be.
She asks me if I'm really no limits. I pause. I dirty thought enter my mind, but I'm not sure if I should act on it. I tell her to turn around... she's standing, I'm on my knees. I have her bend over. I pull her ass cheeks wide and stick my tongue into her ass. I lick. I thrust deep... deeper... deep as I can.
I ask her if it's ok. She says it feels good. "It's kind of like a massage inside my ass." I bury my face between her cheeks and stick my tongue in as deep as I can, rolling and sliding it around.
"See, I do anything," I tell her when I stop. She tells me she believes me, but she's not kissing me until I brush my teeth. I laugh. I stand up. We hug. We kiss anyway. A short one first, then a deep long one where I'm sticking my tongue deep into her throat.
She starts laughing. "I don't believe I did that." We check the time. We've been out in the woods for over 2 hours. We decide it's time to "call it a day." S will just put on her other clothes... I tell her I'll go to the car and get them for her.
I walk naked back to the car, and grab her clothes. Still nobody around. I take them back to her. She's standing naked with he back against a tree.
We talk dirty for awhile and agree on a "quickie." (Maybe I talked her into it, but it didn't take much). We fool around a little bit, and then I suggest we just watch each other play with ourselves.
"You are a kinky one, aren't you?" she says. It catches me off guard, then she kisses me on the cheek. "It sounds hot. Let's do it."
We sit on the ground, facing each other, legs spread wide, crossing each other around the ankles. I watch her play. She watches me play.
I find her pussy fascinating. As she plays with herself, it gets larger, like some kind of pussy erection. He lips swell up. Get positively huge. I wonder if mine do that. (I'll have to check later, I think to myself). She is rough, and fast, and kind of harsh with herself. I realize I've been doing nothing but looking at her pussy, so I look up at her face. Her eyes are wide. Her mouth is open. She's also staring at me, which is a big turn on. I start to get really into it. She looks up. Our eyes meet. She starts to cum. I start to cum. We cum together....
I've never had a mutual orgasm before. It was always me doing a guy, or him doing me, or me doing myself. Me and S got to share a simultaneous orgasm. Yes, we were each doing ourselves, but it was also together. It was ... special. Special sounds like such a lame word here, but it's all I've got. It was a moment of intense personal sharing.
We finish, and just sit staring at each other for awhile. We lean forward to kiss and make out some. Then we're rolling around on the ground... and end up in another 69.
We agree to just stop. We could do this all day, all night, forever. We make plans, get dressed, and head home.
Monday morning, my place, 9:30. I'll be naked. She'll bring ice cream. I can't stop thinking about it.
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I am having the most awesome weekend ever.
On Friday morning I decided to spend some time at the coffee shop. It's about 2 blocks from where I live. I used to hang out there all the time until I met J and started spending all my time with him.
I got dressed first, actually pretty conservative. After my last experience I just wasn't exactly in the mood to dress terribly sexy or slut or whatever you want to call it. I wore a skirt and a shirt. Nothing too tight. Nothing too revealing. But I didn't wear underwear because these days I just don't wear underwear. Seriously, I have to think to put it on. Not wearing it is normal.
So I'm at the coffee shop sitting in a chair reading a book. I'm kind of slouched down. Then this girl comes up to me and is like "do you know your flashing everyone who comes in the door?" Well, actually I didn't know. I wasn't even thinking about it. But the way I was sitting pretty much gave everybody a good view of my pussy as they came in the door. (I hope it was good for business).
I sort of laughed about it and thanked the girl, but didn't move or anything. Let em look. I kinda liked the idea, and it made me feel a bit sexy, which is something I hadn't felt in a couple days. The girl said something else to me and we started talking.
The girl - S - is about my age and kind of cute. As we talk I start thinking about her sexually. I'm sort of flirting with her, but I'm trying not to come on too strong. I just can't help it. The topic of conversation doesn't help though (or maybe it does help). We've move on from me showing off my pussy to some of my public exploits. I'm not giving too many details because I don't want her to run away thinking I'm some sort of sex freak (even though I am), but I am telling her about dressing up in next to nothing when I go out, and my little trip to the mall the other day.
I get bold and suggest that she should try it. On the one hand, I'm really getting into her and liking the idea of seeing her dressed like a slut. On the other, I think the idea of both of us dressing up as sluts walking around turning some heads and maybe even making out in public is really hot.
S seems interested but afraid. She can't imagine dressing up like that at home and then having to face her parents before she leaves or when she comes back. I suggest we go back to my place (I can't believe I actually used that line!) so she can borrow some of my clothes. We can have some fun that afternoon, then she can change back before she goes home. Her parents will never know.
She agrees. I'm in heaven. I have no idea how far this is going to go, but I can't stop imagining the possibilities. I've got her on my mind the whole way back to the apartment.
We get to my place. I start going through some of my stuff to find something for her. I tell her to take off her top, which she does. The bra too, I tell her. The bra comes off. I stop a minute to look at her.
This is so different for me. I'm the one doing the telling and somebody else is doing. I don't want to use the words ordering and obeying, but maybe that's what it really is. I'm feeling powerful. It's like the slutwhoregoddess feeling, but different. It's sexual and strong. Slutwhoregodess is powerful, but this feeling is strong. There's a difference somehow.
I give S my sleeveless button-down white top and help her into it. When it's on I start buttoning it up from the bottom.. just two buttons. I tell her no more. She says OMG but doesn't disagree. "I'm going to get a lot of stares," she says. "That's the point." I say.
I have her take of her shorts and panties and start looking for a skirt for her. She's got a hairy bush. I tell her that's not going to do. I tell her that needs to be shaved, and lift up my skirt to show her my hairless pussy. Of course, she's see it before, along with everyone at the coffee shop, but I like showing it off to her. Actually, I want her staring at it and liking it.
"Do you think so?" she asks. "Definitely," I tell her.
I go an get shaving gel, a towel, and a fresh razor from the bathroom. I have her sit on the corner of my bed, on the towel, with one leg on either side of the corner. Then I realize we need water, so I go get a bowl of water.
I suppose I could have just pointed to the shower and had her shave herself, but I really wanted to "do her." No other thought entered into my mind. I was going to "do her."
I sprayed some gel into my hand and lathered up her thick hair. I admit, I copped a feel or two. She didn't say anything about it. I was feeling so naughty.
I started the shaving. Carefully. Slowly. The whole time I'm talking to her and giving her shaving advice. The gel I use is fantastic. Don't let this go more than a couple days or it will itch like crazy.
About half way through I look up at her and stop. "Take off your top," I tell her. She's like, what? And I'm like "Well, it's really my top. Just take it off." She takes it off and is now naked. I take off my top and skirt and am naked too. "This just seems right," I tell her. She agrees. I like where this is going.
I finish shaving her and set the bowl and razor aside. I take her hand and push it onto her pussy. "Do you like how it feels?" I ask. I'm guiding her hand along her pussy, and slide her fingers between her lips. Let's not lie about it. I'm making her play with herself. "Yes," she says. She's turned on. Her words are breathy. Almost a whisper.
I let go and her hand keeps exploring on its own. I just watch for awhile. I like it.
I take her hand again and push it towards my pussy. Her fingers slide between my lips a little nervously. She's looking up at me, eyes wide, lips parted. I will never forget that look. "Do you like this too?" I ask. "Yes," she says again. The words barely come out. She clears her through and says it again. "Yes."
I move my hand to her pussy. We spend a good 5, maybe ten minutes, playing with each other. Eyes locked. I feel like she is looking to me for direction, maybe even worshiping me, if that makes any sense. I'm her world and I know it.
I see her wiggling. Hear her moaning just a little, like she's trying not to. I ask her if she's going to cum for me. "For me," I think. I must have gotten that from J. She whispers yes.
I stop playing. She looks at me longingly. "I have to do this," I explain. I get down on my kneed and start exploring her pussy with my tongue. I love the taste, the feeling, the smell. I love how she shakes and quivers in response to what I'm doing. I lick. I suck. I stick my tongue deep into her pussy. I start concentrating on her clit.
I look up and tell her to play with her tits, which she does without hesitation. I alternate between paying attention to her pussy and give her directions. She responds immediately, which is such a turn on. Pull hard. Squeeze. Pinch. Flick. Stretch. Caress.
I start exploring her pussy with my fingers while I continue to use my lips and tongue. She comes. I feel a kind of release too.
I crawl up on the bed with S, and cuddle beside her. We kiss on the lips a few times before I joke to her "do you know where these lips have been?" We're silly. Giggly. Just a couple of girls having fun. It's not like with J at all. There's something girlish about the whole thing. We're having a good time, sex is involved, but it's not the filthy fuck marathon it is with me and J.
We're talking, caressing, kissing lightly. It becomes heavy. We're both exploring each other with our hands. We move to each others breasts. I think to myself that I'm such a naughty slut for licking a girl's pussy before touching her breasts. The order seems backwards. Suddenly I'm really fucking hot. "Make me cum," I whisper in her ear.
Her fingers find my pussy and start manipulating me. My arms are wrapped around her, holding her tight against me. She works my faster and harder than I've ever felt. I look into her eyes and bite on her lip as I cum.... it's one of those orgasms... the kind that doesn't stop. "Don't stop," I tell her. She's confused. I'm in the middle of an orgasm so I can't explain. "Just don't stop," I tell her. It's kind of like an order.
She keeps rubbing me hard and fast. I keep coming. I'm moaning. I'm screaming. I'm sweating. I'm swearing. I'm shaking. Every now and then I need to interject with "Don't stop." At some point I can't take it anymore and push her away. I roll over, breathing heavy, exhausted.
S wants to know what that was all about, but I have to wait to explain it. I need to first recover. Then I explain to her the whole endless orgasm thing. She says "Wow" about six times. She can't believe it. "You saw it didn't you?" I joke.
We talk for awhile. It's the middle of the afternoon. We've been her for hours. She says she needs to go. I say I hope we can do this again. We never did get a chance to go out and turn heads. She smiles and says she's like that. We set a date for the next day - Saturday. We're going to meet at the mall, and I'm going to bring a change of clothes for her.
She gets dressed and leaves. I walk naked to the balcony and call out to her as she leaves the building. I wave to her, then watch her walk away. I stay out on the balcony until she's out of site, and then go back in.
I shower. Clean up my bedroom. Flop out on the bed and dream about her.. fantasizing by replaying everything that just happened. I cum again. Then fall asleep naked.
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OK... I wasn't sure if I was going to write this, but I've decided to go ahead with it. I've had my first "bad" experience. At first I just wanted to forget it, but now I want to think about it, maybe learn from it.
Something went horribly wrong, but I'm not sure what. I need to figure this out.
Yesterday morning I went over to J's before he had to go to work. I put on a tight and clinging pair of shorts (I've started calling them my Camel Toe shorts), and a even tighter tank. No bra or panties, of course. I almost never wear underwear anymore! (That's going to change in a couple weeks when I get back to school).
So I go to see J, he lets me and, and there's this other guy there, some friend of his. Now, J and I have been keeping our relationship a secret, and for good reason. I don't think anyone could really handle that I'm with a guy over twice my age for no real reason other than sex. If anybody found out - my mom, my friends - they're just not going to be able to handle it. Shit would hit the fan.
I asked J if he wanted me to leave, but he told me to stay. He said he was going to show his friend what a good slut I was. At first I was really excited about this ... nervous too, but definitely turned on. J and I had talked about having other guys over to "use" me (usually in some kind of anal marathon), but I didn't think it would ever come true. This looked like a fantasy coming true, so I was definitely eager.
J said it would be best if we didn't know each other's names, which I agreed. An anonymous fuck sounds *very* hot to me (still does).
J had me strip and started showing me off. He and his friends commented on what a good slut I was, and how I was so well trained. I was really proud when J told him that I didn't need training and I was just a natural. I started to feel like Slutwhoregoddess - infinitely powerful goddess of sex, filth, and kink.
I showed off my piss drinking by drinking a glass of ice water, then peeing into the glass. The ice was still in there, which was a little different. It added a new level of kink drinking iced piss. J had me eat a few ice cubes when it was over.
After that was some anal play with J's favorite golfballs. I slide the golfballs into my ass and then poop them out. Once they're out they go into my mouth for cleaning. Back and forth, back and forth, ass to mouth with the golfballs.
J likes it. I like it. His friend seems to like it. I'm having a good time.
Then they start talking about how I'll do anything. We talk about how I masturbate in public and walk around naked and stuff. J tells him about the time I walked out to the parking lot naked and made myself cum in his car. The guy seems impressed. Then J makes me talk about those "off limit" fantasies.
They're not off limit for me, but they're off limit for the journal. They're just so fucked up that I'm sure I can't post them. Things that I know are wrong. They're mostly J's fantasies, but I love them so much. I want to do them no matter how wrong they are. J's friend seems really impressed that I want to do those things. Somewhere along the line he starts calling me filthy whore... but it's not a description, it's my name. Filthy Whore.
And then it all starts to go wrong. I realize that to him that's really all I am. A Filthy Whore. I start to get a bad vibe. J wants to show him that I'll do anything... and I will do anything, especially for J, so the friend takes me out to the balcony. I'm standing there naked looking out into the parking lot and he's asking me about some of the public stuff I've done.
Then he tells me to walk naked out into the parking lot, climb into the trash dumpster, and not come out until I make myself cum.
I don't like this idea. I don't know why. For some reason I think if J had told me to do it, I would have found it hot, and loved it. Hell, I'd probably even do it by myself without J watching once in a while if it has been his idea. This other guy, not so much. J does shit like that for the kink of it, but this guy ... there's something else. He thinks I'm filth, but not in a good way. The dumpster is where filth belongs.
I do it anyway. Deep down inside I'm still the girl who does anything, no matter how fucked up it is. I can't say no. Maybe it's pride, but it's something else. I can't say no. I just can't.
I walk naked across the parking lot. For the first time I'm naked in public and feeling bad about it. I'm ashamed and hoping nobody sees me instead of fantasizing about getting caught.
Climbing into the dumpster sucks. It's about 5 feet tall so I have to pull myself up and drag myself over the edge. The metal scrapes against my chest and belly, and I flop in awkwardly, literally rolling into the garbage.
I just lie there face up feeling like shit. I've never felt so fucking small. Suddenly it's like the entire fucking world hates me. The dumpster stinks. I'm sitting naked in piles of other people's shit - I can smell rotten food and baby diapers.
And I'm sort of thinking I belong there. What kind of fuck up crawls naked into a dumpster in the middle of the fucking day because some complete stranger tell her too?
And even more fucked up, I start playing with myself, just because I've been told to. It's what I'm supposed to do, but I can't leave until I cum.
I start crying. I'm really fucking miserable. This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me... and I totally deserve it. Even while I'm laying in a fucking dumpster full of garbage, I can't make myself leave. This is where I belong. I willfully walked across the parking lot and got in. I could have just gone home, but no, I climbed naked into a dumpster.
I'm there for awhile. Eventually I get ahold of myself. Once I'm composed, I start playing with myself again. It takes awhile, but I make myself cum. I think about going home instead, or just telling them that I came, but I just can't do it. I have to go through with it.
I crawl out of the dumpster, which isn't easy. I fall back in once, but am more careful the second time. The walk back to J's apartment is the biggest walk of shame ever.
I am covered with garbage. Well, not covered, but it's on me. Stuck to me. In my hair.
I get back and they're laughing at me. At least the friend is, J is going along with it, but it's not the same kind of laugh. J comes over, gives me a hug, and tells me I was a good girl. It makes me feel better. He starts playing with my pussy, which is heavenly. My pussy doesn't really get much attention - it's usually my ass that he likes to play with, so when he does touch me there it's special. And he does it so well - it's unlike anything I've ever felt. Best feeling in the world.
I start feeling better and it's getting late. The friend is asking me if I spent so much time in the dumpster because I liked it, but I blow him off. J tells me it will be a quick fuck and then I have to go.
He has me get down on my knees and starts playing with my ass. The friend shoves his cock in my mouth and I start sucking. This SHOULD be a fantasy come true, but that guy just makes it miserable. J starts fucking my ass while I take the other guy down my throat. He pulls my hair and is pretty rough with me, but that's nothing. Or as least it should be nothing. J has been rougher, I know. I keep telling myself that.
Other guy thinks I need to wear a double facial home, and J agrees. Normally this would be another fantasy come true, but I'm really just going through the motions. They have me get dressed first, and then kneel between them, giving them both some oral. I'm trying to concentrate on J, but they make me go back and forth. I take two loads in the face, but I'm pretty detached and unemotional.
As I get ready to go J asks me if I'm all right. I tell him I'm fine, and he asks if I'm sure. I tell him I'll do the whole thing over again for him and his friend tomorrow if he wants. That's my thing. If we do something really fucked up and he asks me about it, I always tell him I'll do it again. Usually it's because I loved it and want to do it again, but this time I'm hoping it won't ever happen again... at least not with that guy.
I obediently go home, stinking of trash and face covered with two loads of cum. I'm think that this should have been a really hot experience, but it wasn't. When I get home I take the longest shower ever.
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So ... briefly ... I can't seem to keep up with my journalling. I keep telling myself I'm going to write down everything that happens between me and J (or just me by myself) but I can't keep up.
I didn't end up going a whole week naked last week. I did end up going about 3 days naked, but then J gave me some things to wear for my walks back and forth to his place. First was a set of red garters and hose. He just pulled it out of drawer somewhere and told me to put it on. My instructions were to where it out sometime for "naked public masturbation" and show up at his door wearing them. The idea was totally hot, I have to admit, but I also kind of wondered why he had some garters and hose in his drawer.
I had a funny feeling, so I asked him. "These used to be someone elses, right?" He told me they belonged to his ex, which kind of made me feel ... well, trashy. Any ordinary girl would have tossed them in his face, I think. Who the fuck wants to wear somebody else's garters and hose, especially when it's an ex-s? After I thought about it though, it was kind of a turn on. What kind of filthy slut would do it? Yeah, me. I'm that kind of filthy slut. I do anything and enjoy it. Guilty as charged. It's kind of an odd turn on knowing that the last person to wear these garters was also getting fucked by J...
And I also got a white button down shirt of his in the deal. So that's my outfit. Garters, hose, white button down shirt (only the bottom two buttons are allowed to get buttoned), and shoes. No panties, no bra, no nothing. The bright red garter shows through the white shirt and it's pretty obvious I've got no panties on. In fact when the wind blows right there's quite a view.
So I wore that outfit 3 or 4 times last week on trips back and forth to J's, and once just out for a "public masturbation outing" - although the shirt ended up being off for that one.
Aside from being J's little fuck toy pretty much every day last week, he started giving me "assignments", which I love. Somehow the idea of pleasing him even when he's not there is very satisfying.... there's something just a little bit kinkier about following some orders even though he's not there.
So my assignments... Twice I had to masturbate out on my balacony wearing nothing but the garters and hose. I absolutely love this, but now that mom's back home I'm going to stop. I haven't been noticed yet, but all I need is someone coming to the apartment and telling her about it.
For my other assignment I had to take one of my walks and masturbate somewhere in public wearing nothing but the garters and hose. I found a nice place in a nearby park to pull this one off, laying down between two bushes.. secluded enough to watch people walk by without being seen.
My other assignments have been just for me at home. J gave me a Corona bottle to use on my ass "every day." Believe me, it got it's use. I had to ditch the bottle before mom came home (didn't want her to think I was drinking while she was gone), but that bottle got plenty of use before then...
And then mom came home and put everything on hold. Or maybe she just turned things back to normal. Suddenly I'm wearing clothes again, and being much more discreet with my adventures. No more walking outside naked. No masturbating my ass with a bottle (at home). I haven't seen J since saturday, so I've really been more than a little unsatisfied!
Today I walked to the mall (about 3 miles) in a fairly conservative outfit ... I had the tank with no bra thing going, and a pair of nice tight shorts (no panties - I amost never wear panties anymore), but nothing too crazy. While I was there I kept fantasizing about walking around wearing just a coat and nothing underneath - something I'll save for another day when wearing a coat makes sense - but thinkin about it made me horny. Getting stares from guys who knew I wasn't wearing a bra made me horny too.
I decided to play some "dress up" by going to a store, pickiing some sexy outfits, and trying them on. I deliberately picked a store wear the mirror was outside of the changing room, so I'd have an excuse to show off a little. On my first trip I picked 3 outfits - all tiny dresses - that were sexy, yes, but not really slutty. I wanted something a little more revealing for when I stood in front of that mirror!
I suddenly got the brainstorm that I should try on things that were the wrong size... I found a white strapless dress that was kind of see through that totally clung to me. I put on a way to short dress that not only revealed my ass, I could see my pussy lips hanging out the bottom. I squeezed into a pair of shorts that were "ultimate cameltoe." By my third trip, I was having a lot of fun, and showing off plenty. I squeezed into a skirt that almost wasn't there, revealing way too much above and below, and matched it with a black lacey top that pretty much hid nothing.
And that's when I was asked to leave. Haha! Well, somebody had noticed anyway.
I didn't want to make a show, or do anything that would involve me mom or the law, so I just changed back into my street clothes and left.
The walk home though was just way too much. My pussy was positively aching at this point, so I found a nice hidden patch of grass off to the side of the mall. The ground sloped down kind of steep away from the road, so I just layed down there... so close to the road, but really impossible to see. Or maybe not....
At any rate, nobody complained when I dropped my shorts and made myself cum.
My fantasy is that someday somebody will see me and just stop to watch, or maybe join in. I'm not sure if I want this to be a reality or not. A couple times when I've got caught I've run, but a couple times I've stayed put an given a good show, so i'm not sure what I'd REALLY do if someone decided to watch or join in.
I sort of like the idea of a guy (or two) joining in for a blowjob (or two) out in a public place. I definitely like the idea of a girl or couple watching me, and maybe even joining in. I've never really thought about being with another girl until now, but J has show me some public girl-girl videos that I just love. I know if J introduced me to some girl and told me he wanted me to get it on with her in public I would do it, but then again I would do anything J told me to.
In fact, sometimes I crave being told something. I've heard a couple of his fantasies - stuff I'm not even going to put up here they're so filthry - and I just WANT to do them. They're totally wrong, I know, but I want them anyway.
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Sorry for the lack of updates, but it's been a busy (and fun!) week.
My mom left last Saturday for a vacation, leaving me the apartment all to my own. The big shock here was that before she left she bought me a box of condoms. I was like "WTF?" Actually, I was terrified! For a minute I thought she knew all about J and the crazy shit I was doing or maybe even reading my journal, so I asked her what it was all about. She said I just have a "that look about me" and she wanted me to not make the same mistakes she did (she raised me by herself). I was just totally stunned. I didn't know what to say or do. Honestly I was too scared to say anything.. but I think she kinda understood that. She kind of just let it go with "here they are, keep them in your room. If you need them, fine. If you don't fine. They're good for something like two years. If I ever need more, don't be afraid to ask."
After that first freak out, I've had a week to myself, which has meant plenty of fun... I'm not sure where to begin...
Guess I'll go in order...
Friday night, mom leaves after she gets home from work. I wait for the sun to go down, but I'm pretty much horny from the second I see her pull out of the parking lot. If you've been reading my journal you know I'm into public nudity, and making myself cum in public. I've just got a ton of fantasies that I can't wait to act out, but couldn't really figure out how to pull off living with my mom.
I tried to keep myself busy for the evening. I invited some friends over and we just hung out until 1, but I was really just waiting for it to be really late so I could have some fun. Once they left, I turned from ordinary teen girl into the slutwhoresexgodess... it was like kind of like slipping a switch ... or maybe like a dam breaking. I'd been fantasizing all night, and once they were gone I could do something.
The clothes came off almost immediately. Once I was sure my friends were not around, I stepped out of my apartment wearing nothing but sandles. My big fantasy was to leave the apartment naked and walk over to J's and surprise him, but I still didn't know anything about his life. For all I knew he has a girlfriend over at his place... or maybe he wasn't home because he was working. (I found out later this week - no gf, but I didn't know then). Thinking that J wasn't available, I just left the building, crossed the parking lot, and headed off into the woods behind the complex. That meant streaking through the church grounds next door...
My heart was pounding. Somehow my pussy and tits were throbbing too. I was just so incredibly AWARE of them. You know how usually when you walk around you're not really aware of certain parts of your body... but i could somehow feel them. I felt the air on them..I swear i could feel moonlight and streetlight on them too. Maybe I'm just a little crazy.
I was horny as hell and could have just made myself cum right in the church parking lot, but I was determined to make my naked walk last as long as I could, so I just kept going... and going. I walked around.. through the woods, down streets, cutting through yards and neighborhoods... When cars passed by I tried to hide, but that only happened 2 or 3 times. I was surprised how empty everything way. Nobody, anywhere ... and me walking naked in front of people's homes.
I was totally aware that I had *no* choice in the matter. I *had* to be naked because I left without wearing any clothes. I don't know if that makes any sense, but that's what makes it so hot... It's not just taking of my clothes, becuase I could put them back on again if I got caught. There was *nothing* for me to put back on. I *had* to walk around naked ... and I *had* to walk back naked, even if I suddenly chickened out.
I couldn't stop thinking about this, and it was driving me wild. My hands were shaking... not just my hands, more like my arms... I was just so f-in turned on, but I was determined to go on until I *couldn't* take it anymore,,,
Eventually, i couldn't! It was just too much, so I snuck into somebody's yard, between two houses, sat myself down on the grass and started playing with myself. Call it a kink, but I really wanted to play with myself on grass! I came hard ... really hard! It was another one of those everlasting orgasms that just kept going and going as long as I played with myself. I tried to keep it going as long as i could, kinda just to prove to myself what an awesome slutwhoresexgoddess I am... a tthe same time I had to struggle to keep from screaming, so there was this big battle inside me that made it that much more intense.
I ended it when I couldn't go any further. I sprawled out on the grass and ... fell asleep. No joke. I f-in fell asleep naked on somebody's f-in lawn. I woke up the next morning with a heart attack! I could hear a car starting up somewhere. it was light out.
I bolted up and panicked for about 2 minutes, but then calmed down. it was still pretty early, so not a lot of people were out, but I was pretty far from home. I didn't even have my cell phone ... not that I was about to call anyone.
I had to make a quick naked dash back to the apartment... the ultimate walk of shame. I didn't try to hide myself. I was seen.. no doubt about it. People in cars. People walking dogs. I got some stares ... good and bad.
I was totally humiliated. And when I finally got to the apartment comples I was totally turned on. I'm a sick fuck, I admit it. I'm still not completely used to it though.
I didn't go home. I went to J's. My fantasy did come true... I'd just been out longer than i expected.
He opened the door, looking a little sleepy. When he saw me though he got this big smile. I wanted to rush right into his place, but I forced myself to step back instead. "I need to be used." I told him.
He let me in, told me he liked what I was wearing. I told him what happened, and I even included the part about my mom being away for the week. He said he would let me stay for awhile, but that I had been a naught girl. As punishment he would send me home, naked, at exactly noon. Somehow that sounded perfect to me. I don't want to say "I couldnt' wait" but I was definitely looking forward to it. I knew I would be seen... and I knew I would enjoy it.
J hadn't has a chance to use the bathroom, so I was his morning toilet. Being used as his toilet was something we'd been working on, so it wasn't nearly as messy as that first time. I ended up wearing a bunch, but J has learned to control it, so he's only giving me a little at a time. He fills my mouth and stops. I swallow. Repeat until done.
Once he's taken care of I tell him I have to go, so he gets me a glass. I'm getting good at drinking my own piss (never though I'd ever say that), but this is the first time I've taken us both back to back. It's also a lot since it's first thing in the morning. I'm just FULL by the end of it...
I give J a nice sloppy blow job, working on my deep throating. When he's done, I'm on my back and playing with myself while he watches. Even after I cum, I'm stil horny, so I ask him what's next.
J starts giving me instructions what to do to myself while he watches. He has me playing with my tits and plussy alot, just using my fingers, which is so different... usually it's lots of clamps and objects. Not today.. but I still enjoy it. He litterally has me standing there in his apartment playing with myself for *hours* .. he makes me cum twice... it's actually pretty tame compared to what we're normally up to, but I enjoy it.
Around 11, he gets involved and starts playing with my ass using just his fingers and some lube. I feel him stuffing and stretching me... and ever once in awhile he stuffs his fingers in my face to lick and suck clean. He finishes me up with a good ass banging, and cums deep inside me. Then, as usual, his cock goes right for some "cleaning."
And then he sends me out the door.... I mean *right* then. I've been kinda not mentioning this, but right after anal.. or soon after ... I usually have to use the bathroom. I've googles this and found out that's kind of normal, but it's still just a little too much to journal about .... the thing is, this time he didn't even let me use the bathroom. He just sent me out of his apartment, naked, with my ass ... well, um ... you know...
That walk home was not easy... I was naked.. my ass was dripping.. and oozing.. and felt like it was about to explode. And it was the middle of the day. I couldn't run. I could barely walk! It was horrible.
I got home as quickly as a could, seeing people, making eye contact. Even walking by a few folks on the sidewalk. It was horrible and wonderful. I say that a lot, but so much of what I do is like that. I don't want to keep saying the same things, but it *is* just the same. I'm a slutwhoresexgoddess. A powerful piece of flith. I'm trash, yet a queen.
I get home and use the bathroom immediately. And I'm still uncontrolably horny. I shower, and play with myself in the shower. I get out, towel off and go the bedroom. I lie on my bed naked and replay everything that has happened in the last 12 hours over in my mind. I suddenly realize that I'm fantasizing about *myself* and start thinking about how much of a sick fuck I am. I make myself cum again, and fall asleep naked on the bed. I have *never* made myself cum so much in such a short period of time.
I wake up hours later.. it's like 6 in the afternoon. I grab a bite because I haven't had anything to eat in 20 hours (unless piss counts, I think to myself). I don't even bother getting dressed. At some point I get the absolutely *widked* idea that I might go a whole day... no a whole weekend ... oh, WTF a whole WEEK without wearing clothes. I might make that trip to J's an back naked every day all week.
And I'm really horny again. I start thinking about what I might be able to do that's really naughty, so I head out onto the balcony naked and sit in the chair we have out there. I put my legs up on the railing and spread them open to the sunshine and the parking lot, and start to playing with myself. I swear not one person notices. I see them walk or drive by but not one person sees. I can't decide if that's good or bad, but it works. I make myself cum again, and then just sit out on the balcony for awhile, watching people and waiting to me noticed.
The sun goes down. I wait some more. When I'm pretty sure J is home from work (the reason he tossed me out at noon), I go into the apartment, straight to the door, and walk naked out into the parking lot.
A whole day without wearing clothes... a whole weekend... a whole week. I am *so* ready to be used when I get there ...
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Hey everybody. I know it's been awhile. Had some internet problems.
I'm still meeting up with J about twice a week. I'm getting a little worried because I know the summer is going to be over soon and I'm not sure what will happen. I've been meeting J during the day, mostly during the week. Basically it's just a big secret. I don't know how would could keep it secret come fall when I won't be able to visit during the day. I'm afraid it might end.
I'm hoping to lose my virginity with J before then. I hope that doesn't sound crazy, but this summer's been too great. It just seems like the right way to end it.
I haven't really told J that's what I really want, but we sort of talk about me not being a virgin anymore. He says I have to learn to deep throat first... when I can take his cock so deep that my nose touches his crotch. The idea is just totally hot, and I like having the "reward" at the end. That's only half of it though...
The other half is my ass. J has been really working it with all kinds of stuff... He's been doing me with bottles, which I think is some kind of turn on for him. The guy just loves bottles! So the other part of me losing my virginity is that I have to take a Corona bottle in my ass ... big end first! That's fucking crazy, so of course I love it. In fact I want it. I don't have any Corona bottles at home (I'm not 21), but I've been finding all kinds of things to "practice" stuffing my ass with. I can't f-in believe how much I've stretched since then.
I've had a whole lot of other fun in the past few weeks too. J has started using packing tape to tie me up. He loves taping my pussy shut, and then ripping that tape off after like 10 minutes. It hurts but it feels good.
And of course, I'm still finding ways to sneak out around time dressed in ... well, basically nothing. :-) I absolutely love making myself cum outside. Been caught a couple times and had some near misses, which has been cool. I love looking right into a stranger's eye right when I cum... I did get caught by a couple girls awhile back. They sort of laughed at me, but I really wanted them to stay and watch. I never really thought about girls before, but I'm thinking that way now!
Anyway, that's just a quick update. I think now that my internet is back I'll be updating a little more often.
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ok - f-ed up morning this morning.
I woke up this morning, went into the bathroom, and started looking at those three words written across my hips. Honestly, it was keeping me up all night. Couldn't stop thinking about it. I was so looking forward to getting out of bed this morning!
I went into the kitchen, grabbed a nice big glass, and then went back into the bathroom. Stripped. Then relieved myself into the glass, watching myself into the mirror. I don't know what to say that I haven't said before. It's so wrong, but so right. It's disgusting, but I love it. I want it. I crave it.
I drank it. It felt really good. I felt extra powerful - and that's the word that really describes it - because I'd done it on my own. It's power. I just feel sexually strong - like I'm a f-ck goddess and nothing can stop me.
All proud of myself for my morning solo act of filthy kink, I set my mind to doing more. If I could do *that* by myself, why not some of the other stuff. Why not something public?
I went into my room and went through my clothes. I picked out a short skirt - too small to hide the first word written across my hips - and white, sleeveless, button down top that stopped just above my belly button. No bra. No panties. This would be perfect. I got dressed and went for a walk.
Instead of going into town, I turned the other direction, where all the houses are. I walked aways, made a couple turns, and was finally on a quiet street where a whole bunch of rich people live. Huge houses. Huge yards. Gated drives. And no traffic.
I unbuttoned my top and walked for awhile with my tits hanging out. There was not a sign of anyone around. Not one car or anything. I took the top off. My phone rang.
It was my girl friend, asking me if I was going to the pool. I told her I some things to do. Deep inside I was on fire though. Here I am walking topless down the street - which is already pretty hot - and she's on the phone with me with no clue.
The street ends in a cul de sac. I walk to the end and turn around, walking back. That explains the no traffic. No where to go. I keep walking until I get off the phone. 22 minutes. I've been walking around in public f-in topless for 22 minutes! I feel really good about myself.
The end of the private road approaches and I can see the main street ahead. There is traffic. No way am I walking topless there, so I put my shirt back on... but I don't button it. I turn on the street so that I'm walking with traffic. I know you're not supposed to do that, but it's the only way I can pull this off. People coming up on me from behind wont see that my shirt is open. People driving the other direction MIGHT not see, but if they do they won't see much.
I walk for about 10 minutes with cars whizzing by and then I see a power station off the road. It's back in the trees a little bit. It's go a good view of the road, but not too good. That's going to be my place.
I walk up the driveway to the station - about 30 feet off the road - and lean up against the fence, facing the road. Off comes my shirt, then the skirt, and I start playing with myself. Traffic is going by in both directions. I can see them ... maybe they can see me. Nobody stops though. I'm flying. I'm just so energized, so turned on. I love the feel of the fence on my back. Somehow it's really sexy. Chain link fence is sexy - I need to remember that.
I cum. I'm panting after, like I'd just ran a mile or something. I stand their naked, just enjoying it. The sun is beating down on my chest and it feels so good. I decide that I really like being naked outside.
Then a car slows down as it goes by. It stops. I think "oh f-ck" and grab my clothes as fast as I can. The car backs into the drive and I'm off running into the woods, trying to dress as I go.
I run for awhile, back between people's houses. When I'm sure I wasn't followed I stop and catch my breath. Maybe I was just a little too daring. It was worth it, I think to myself.
I start cutting through yards to figure out my way home. I'm certainly not going back in case that car is still there. I wish I could find someplace to hide for an hour ...
And then I stumble into somebody's back yard. I'm in that rich neighborhood again. There's an inground pool there, and some guy about my age sitting there in his bathing suit.
I realize that I hadn't even buttoned up my shirt. My tits are still hanging out. I didn't even think about it while I was walking. Guess I got used it.
He's looking at me. I like it. I feel flirty, sexy, horny.
"Mind if I use your pool?" I ask. "Why would I let you use the pool?" he answers. I slide out of my shirt and say "because I won't be wearing a suit." I somehow manage not to laugh while saying this. He tells me to go ahead. Off comes my skirt and I dive in naked.
Swimming naked feels better than walking around naked. That's all I can say. It's not even sexual, really. It's just a good feeling. Like really nice sheets or comfortable pajamas.
The boy gets up and looks like he's about to five in. I tell him to stay there. He says it's his pool. "Yeah, and there's a naked chick in your pool. Piss her off an you've got the pool all to yourself!" I'm saying this standing in the shallow end, my chest above water. I feel really powerful, and the boy is just such a wuss. He's got a good body, well muscled, works out, but he's a puppy. He goes back to his chair and I go back to swimming.
I get out of the pool and ask him to get me a towel. Her throws me his and I dry off. He asks me what's on my hips. He thinks it's some kind of tatoo. I walk up to him and show him up close.
"WTF?" he says. "Let's just say it's well deserved," I tell him. First he's like "no way", but then I give him some details. He says it's gross. That I'm filthy and f-ed up. He calls me a bunch of names.
Somehow it's painful. It's like he's punching me. I can feel it in my gut. I yell a few things at him, and grab my clothes. I speed walk out of the yard and back onto that same street I was walking topless on an hour and a half earlier. This time I'm dressed though. My mood is ruined.
I calm down during the walk, get home, shower, and have a long think. I'm a f-in sex freak of some kind. Who the f-ck does the things I do? What sort of nutcase am I? Whatever I've become in the last couple weeks has changed me. I'm not normal anymore - at least not in the sex department. But I can't imagine ever not doing these things. Will I go my whole life without getting my ass f-ked again? I doubt it. Will I ever not drink p-- again? I can't imagine it. It's not just something f-ed up I do, it's something f-ed up I LOVE.
I want to see J, but I know that's just a bad idea. We're not in a relationship. It CAN'T be a relationship. It's just sex. I never thought I'd say that, or be here, or do any of these crazy things that I've been doing.
Things are f-ed.
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So I met with J last thursday, and again today. Maybe I'll write about last thursday later, but today is so fresh in my mind.
I left the apartment wearing a short skirt and a small top with straps. It's sunday, so I didn't want to attract too much attention. At least not on my walk over.
When I got to J's he made me take it all off, then put the top and skirt back on without underwear. Then we went for a walk downtown. I kept thinking about the videos we saw of girls exposing themselves while they walked down the street and I was sort of expecting that was what was going to happen, but J wanted us to be a little discreet since we were walking together. Probably a smart idea. Still, I was turning some heads, which was making me happy ... and horny.
We walked about a half an hour, then stopped at a sandwich place for lunch. We ate and talked dirty. Honestly, it felt like our first "date." Usually I just go over to his apartment for sex. We were actually out together, eating a meal, and talking. It was a first.
As we were getting ready to go, he said to me "I haven't seen you drink piss since that first time." "No you haven't". I said. I had a huge smile on my face. "I think it's time you did it again," he said. "Mine or yours?" I asked. I'd been thinking about it ever since that first time, and wondering when it would happen again. I was sure it was a matter of if, not when... like everything else, really. I just expect it's going to happen. I'm expecting to lose my virginity to this guy eventually, even though we never talk about it. I don't want to seem eager. Stupid really - I drink piss, but I don't want to seem eager about having sex.
He told me he likes it better when I drink my own. I tell him that I hope to drink his really. It's something I've been thinking about and want to try. I think it would be hot for him to just go right in my mouth.
I finish my drink and we leave, but I'm carrying the cup with me. We walk around to the back of the building into the ally, where he tells me to piss in the cup. I lower the cup, but before I start he tells me to pull my top up. Now this is more like what I was expecting.
I pull my top up over my tits and then lower the cup. He's playing with my nipples while I try to go, which makes it harder. His touch is very distracting. I tell him to stop so I can go, which he does. And then I fill up that cup.
Again I'm shocked at how hot it is. I don't know if I'll ever get used to that. Then I think what a filthy slut I am, thinking about getting used to how hot piss is when I drink it. Just like the first time, I try to psyche myself up to just chug it all down at once. Do it. Get it done. Enjoy that afterglow. I don't enjoy the actual drinking, but afterwords I feel wonderful.
He stops me half way though, telling me not to drink it all. The interuption really throws me ... I gag and spit some of it up. I think I end up snorting some into my nose.
He tells me he wants me to drink the rest out on the street where people are watching. WTF. And I mean WTF is a good, that's so f-in filthy kind of way. I shake my tits at him and ask if I should walk out like this. He says it's probably not a good idea.
I pull down my shirt and we walk out of the ally, back onto the main street. There are plenty of people out there... and I swear they're all looking at me. I'm such a filthy slut ... filthier than they can imagine... and yet I LOVE it SO much. How can being so wrong .. so totally f-ed up ... feel so good?
As we walk down the street J has me sip the cup slowly. No gulping. Just little bits here and there. It's really difficult not to let on that I'm drinking something so f-in foul, and that somehow turns me on like crazy. By the time the cup is empty, I'm on fire. I've reached that insane level of arrousal that I didn't even know existed two weeks ago. It's like being electicuted or something ... pure sexual energy pounding through you making your body do crazy things.
I feel a wet drip slide down my leg. I'm so f-in excited my pussy is litterally dripping while I'm wakling down the street. The drop slides all the way down to my foot. I think I'm going to explode ... or fall over ... or just start playing with myself in the middle of the street because I can't control myself.
"I need to cum now," I tell J.
He starts to tease me by talking dirty to me, telling me all kinds of filthy things we could do. He talks about f-ing my ass right there on the street, or maybe letting people take turns as they come by. He talks about ... all kinds of things ... I can't even remember. I just remember getting more and more turned on. My hands are shaking. I can hardly walk. I'm begging him: "Please, I need to cum."
We make a couple turns and dart between a couple buildings. The alley we're in isn't particularly secluded... in fact, it feels really exposed. He tells me to lift up my shirt and play with my tits. He has me pull them. Pinch them. Stretch them. He's very specific which is different... normally he just tells me to play with myself and only watches. This time he's directing. I like it. I'm hoping he does me in the alley ... let's me suck his cock, or maybe even fuck my ass.
He tells me to start playing with my pussy. I start rubbing while he just watches. I look over and make eye contact with some guys walking by. Again I feel that big smile on my face and get that powerful super slut feeling. Look at me! I'm the freakiest girl on the planet. J is still talking dirty to me.
He asks me if I'm his slut. I say yes. He says to say the whole thing - say that I'm his slut. "I'm your slut." I say. He says louder. I say it louder. Then he gives me new things to say.
"I'm your piss drinking slut."
"I'm your ass fucking slut."
"I'm your whore."
"I love to drink my piss."
And then I'm cumming ... just like a week ago, it starts but doesn't stop. WTF is that? I've never heard of such a thing. An orgasm that just doesn't stop. I stop playing with myself, but J tells me to keep going. He doesn't know about the endless orgasm I had that other time. He was watching from pretty far away and probably didn't know.
J keeps me cumming for a long time... way long. I can barely stand. I can feel my legs crumpling. I start to bend over.
He lets me stop. He practically has to carry me back to the apartment, my legs are so wobbly. I feel like I'm going to fall over, or sway out into the street, or something.
We get back to his place. I'm still feeling wobbly. He looks me in the eye and says "what now?"
"Use me." I tell him. It's what I want - to be used for his pleasure. I just want him to cum because of something I've done.
He strips me, and starts fingering me. He starts touching me like he's going to spend some time pleasuring me, which is nice and all, but not what I want. Then he turns me around and starts fingering my ass. I'm wanting him to fuck it SOOO much. I start dirty talking back to him.
"Fuck my ass. Fuck your dirty slut's ass. Fuck this piss drinking whore..." I start spewing all kinds of filth. This is new for us - new for me - but it feel natural, like I've been doing it for years. Like those words SHOULD be coming out of my mouth. None of it seems like an act. It just seems so real. I am a piss drinking whore who wants to be fucked in the ass.
He bends me over right there in living room and enters me, even though we're both standing. This is only the third time I've had anal - all in less than a week - so I'm really just shocked that this position is even possible. Shouldn't it take some time for me to get used to it? I don't know. I just love it. He bangs my ass hard... harder than the other two times which were really gentle. This time he's ripping me a new one and it HURTS.
I really don't understand it. It hurts, but I love it. I don't ever think "I want it to stop" or "I'll never do that again." Instead it's "I can't wait til next time." Perhaps I love misery... anal sex, piss drinking, calling myself a filthy whore. Why do I enjoy these things?
He cums in my ass. I feel the squirt. That feeling turns me on so much. Then I turn around, get down on my knees, and start sucking his cock. Three times I've had anal sex, three times I've finished it by sucking his cock clean. Yeah, his cock is dirty. Yeah, I can taste it. Yeah, it. Along with blood - my blood - and semen. Yeah, it's gross and disgusting. And yeah, I like it. It feels natural. Like it's the right thing to do. And when I'm doing it ... and long after ... I feel so good... like I've done some great achievement. Climbed the biggest mountain that nobody ever has. Won the superbowl. I don't know ... it's just a really good feeling.
I look up at him and ask "what now?" He asks me if I still want more. I tell him I always want more. He tells me to wait and goes into the bedroom.
He comes back with a hanger .. the kind with clamps on them. I'm getting that turned on dirty feeling just looking at it. Without a word he clamps the clamps to my nipples. It hurts, but I love it. I think I love looking at it more than how it feels, but I still love it. He starts tugging on the hanger.. gently... roughly... slowly... then he just pulls it off with a sudden snap. I scream. I mean a REALLY scream.
"Again?" he asks. I nod.
He does it again. Puts it on... several minutes of tugging .. and then YANK. I don't scream as much this time, but I can feel my eyes water. There's a tear running down my face.
And I'm horny as hell.
We repeat the whole thing several more times. I lose count of how many. One of my nipples is bleeding after the last time. My pussy is on fire and aching. And I'm crying.
"What now?" he asks. "Use me." I tell him. It's the only way to express what I want. "How?" he says. I think for a minute. "I want to drink your piss - right from your cock. Piss in my mouth." Something changes in me while I say the words. The tears stop and I feel powerful ... 20 feet tall... sexiest woman alive. "Piss in this slut's mouth and make me your toilet."
I don't know where I'm getting the words from.
We go into the bathroom and I sit on the toilet (ok, I use it first, then he comes in... really, let me leave that out). He puts his cock in my mouth and I start sucking ... waiting. He gets hard, and then starts to go without warning. It comes WAY too fast... I gulp some down but end up wearing most of it. He pulls out of my mouth and ends up squirting most of it in my face. I try to catch as much as I can in my mouth and slurp it down, but it goes everywhere.
I start laughing. "We're going to have to work on that." I say. We start making jokes about how I need a lot more practice. The humor goes out of his voice and he tells me to start licking it up. I love it and get that big smile again. Where does he get all these dirty ideas? I don't care. I just love them. I get down on my hands and knees and start licking the floor... then the toilet when he tells me to.
"You'd do anything I ask, wouldn't you?" J asks. "Yes," I tell him. "You're not just saying that." "Nope." I would do anything for him.
He starts listing things - each one filthier than the one before - and I keep saying yes. Would I lose my virginity with 10 guys while he watches? Yes. Would I fuck a girl if he brough one it? Yes. Pierce my nipples? Yes. Pierce my clit? Yes. Fuck a bottle? Yes. Have "piss drinking whore" tatooed over my pussy? Yes. On my chest, where I couldn't hide it? Yes. I don't hesitate with any of my answers, becuase I WANT it. I shake my head, not because he's asking to much, but because I know I'm crazy ...screwed up.
He says some other things ... I don't know if I can put them up here. Really nasty things. I say "Wow" first... and then "yes." Some of them are just way out there ... things I couldn't even imagine.
I'm smiling up at him. "Use me," I tell him. I like saying that. I like what happens when I say it.
J turns around and has me start licking his ass, sticking my tounge deep inside.
"Has any other girl done this?" I ask. He tells me yes. I'm kind of dissappointed, jealous. "All of it?" I ask. "Pretty much," he says.
I know nothing about J's past. In fact, I don't know anything about his present. He could be doing the exact same thing 5 days a week with some other girl, or a wife. I don't even f-in know his last name, or what he does for a living.
I'm mad at myself ... I spoiled the mood. I can feel it slipping away.
He can sense it too.
"Wait here," he says. He leaves, then comes back with a black magic marker. He has me stand and then writes just over my pussy "PISS DRINKING WHORE" in 1 inch high letters across three rows.
"I've never done that to anyone." Everything is fixed. I'm on fire again. It's wonderful. So wrong. So f-ed up.
"You know that's going to be there for days?" I ask. He nods. "I won't be able to wear a bathing suit." He nods some more. "I'm going to be really careful so my friends don't see it. F- my friends! My mom is going to see it!" I'm practically laughing. I kiss him.
"I hope your ready," I tell him, "because your piss drinking whore needs her throat fucked..."
He was ready.
And then I wonder where the day has gone. I have to get home and shower. Eat dinner with my mom. Write in my journal. And I've got three words under my pants burning across my body to remind me of it all. It's almost like I can feel it down there.
And I'm wondering ... is there any way I can drink some of my piss tonight without my mom noticing? I'm so f-ed up. Tomorrow morning ... I think to myself... Tomorrow morning I know a great way to start my day.
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For the next several days after my last encounter (see the previous entry), I'm just incredibly horny. Those videos that I watched are running through my head pretty much constantly, never mind what I actually did. I'm walking around thinking abut sex all the time. I end up making myself cum at least 3 times a day, which is just overboard. I can't help myself.
The weekend passes. (Last weekend if you care - June 28th or something). Monday comes around and I just can't take it anymore. I put on my slutsuit and grab a towel like I'm heading out to the pool, but I'm really heading to that guy's apartment. Guess I should give him a name. Let me call him J.
I knock on J's door and ask him if I can come in. I'm really nervous because I know what I'm there for, but I don't know how to ask for it. When the door closes behind me I just turn all stupid. I can't say a thing.
Somehow J knows and asks me if I want to watch some movies. That makes is SO much easier. We move over to the couch again and start watching his laptop.
The first clip is a girl walking down the street wearing a tiny skirt and a tank top. She lifts up her skirt and her top and flashes the camera guy, as well as people walking by. J asks me what I think and I tell him it's hot.
The next clip is outdoors again. Different girl, but basically the same outfit. She's in a park or someplace, but you can see people walking by behind her. She lifts up her shirt and skirt and starts playing with herself. She finds a sex toy and toys her pussy and ass until she cums. Meanwhile all these people are just walking by.
I'm getting really turned on. I think about how last time J and I were together how I took off my suit and started playing with myself. I think about doing it again, but am not sure how he'll react.
The third clip is more public stuff. Two girls in dresses this time, making out in a public street. People are turning their heads to stare at them while they walk by. The girls pull each others dresses down and start playing and sucking each other's tits. And people are still just walking by.
J asks me again what I think. I tell him that I think I'm going to be doing something outside today. It's just an automatic, something we both know. Last time we watched some clips and I performed one of them. This time is going to be the same. I sort of wonder if he picked the clips knowing that. I sort of hope he did. And then I start wondering what he could get me to do by picking the clips.
I'm kind of shocked at myself when I figure that out. I enjoy the clips and WANT to act them out. I don't think there's anything I wouldn't do, especially considering last time. That scares me, but it also excites me.
Again, I feel like some kind of sex queen, or goddess or something. Like I'm the sexiest girl in the world.
J asks me if I want to watch more, or just get down to business. My response really surprises me. It comes out before I even have time to think about it.
"Tell me what to do."
He tells me to take off my bathing suit, which I do. Then he give me his car keys. He wants me to walk into the parking lot naked, find his car, and get in the passenger side. Put my feet up on the dash, and play with myself until I cum.
I love just thinking about. I take his keys and head out of his apartment. As I walk down the stairs that same feeling I had had the week before hits me. I'm just excited off the scale. My hands are trembling from sexual excitement - although there is some fear. It's strange. It's the middle of the f-in day. People WILL see me. I know it. I can't wait for it. But it also scares me.
I walk naked out of the apartment building and into the parking lot. I look back to see J watching me from the balcony of his apartment. I click the button on his keys to try to find his car. Nothing.
I wanted around the parking lot for a little bit, clicking the key until I figure out which car is his. People do see me. I see them looking at me. Somehow they're all guys. Each time I see one I can't help by smile at them. It's like they're saying "you're a slut and I love it." I'm saying "I'm such a sex freak."
I spot a convertible with the top down and wonder if that is his. I sort of want it to be his, but it turns out not be. His car is really rather ordinary. I open it up, roll down the windows, and get in.
My feet are on the dash and I'm playing with myself when a bunch of guys walk by. The yell stuff at me, and I'll be damned if I don't enjoy it. One of the says "Yeah baby!" All I can do is smile at him.
I cum with an audience of strangers, plus J watching from up in his apartment. It's incredibly intense. More intense then anything I've ever experienced... and it just keeps going. WTF? My orgasm starts and doesn't stop. I've never experienced anything like that before. I just keep going, waiting for it to stop, and it just doesn't. I finally stop playing with myself and let it fade away.
The guys are laughing at me. I wonder if I was screaming.
I'm breathing hard, but after a few minutes I get ahold of myself. "Show's over" I tell the guys. They move on. I'm actually really proud of how I handled that.
I lock up the car and go back to the apartment. When J answers the door I throw my arms around him and kiss him. "That was great!" I shout in his ear. Then I realize what happened. I just f-in kissed him. It seems weird. He's watched me make myself cum twice. I've given him a blow job. But we'd never kissed. Suddenly it felt like a relationship or something, which wasn't what I thought was going on.
"Time to suck my dick, dirty girl," he says. The words set me on fire. He grabs my hair and pushes me down, which I surprisingly enjoy. I give him blow job, but it's much rougher than the first. He's much more forceful and pulls my hair. I've never done a blow job like that before. Then I realize that what's happening is that my mouth is being F-CKED.
I gag on his load. Smile up at him. I tell him that was great too. He says he thought I might like it. I asking him if there's anything else he thinks I might like. I know I'm teasing - flirting - but I'm also offering. Before I just *thought* I would do anything, but know I *know* I will. I'm offering him the chance.
J asks me if there's anything I want to do, anything dirty that I've ever wanted to try. I'm stumped. I really don't have any idea because I just don't know anything. Yeah, I've heard of some stuff, but nothing like what just happened. Nothing like what happened last time. My poor imagination can't compare.
The nastiest thing I can think of is anal. My mind is just a complete blank otherwise. "I want you to F-ck my ass," I tell him. He asks me if I have any experience and I tell him no.
He puts me down on my hands and knees, and the starts fingering me .. my pussy and my ass. Both are tight, but he just keeps working them. He goes off to get some lube and comes back. The fact that he even has lube makes me wonder. Does this guy have a girlfriend? Or a wife? WTF am I doing? I don't even know.
I don't say anything. He keeps fingering me down there, using the lube. I'm enjoying it, but this time I AM nervous. I'm just plain afraid. I know it's going to hurt. I try to psyche myself up by reminding myself of the things I've done. Anal should be nothing compared to that, right?
He asks me if I'm ready, and I say yes. He gets behind me and jabs his c-ck in my ass. It hurts, but not as much as I expect it too. He gently talks me through it, and is really rather easy with me. I relax. I feel him cum. I'm not going to say it was "good" for me, but I feel good about it. I feel sexy.
And sore.
I turn around and see him holding his cock. It's messy. Covered with cum and lube and blood. My blood, I think to myself.
He asks me if I'm going to clean his dick. The words flick some kind of slut switch inside me - some dirty filthy whore switch. I crawl over, sit up, and grab his limp cock at the base, and just look at it. I've got a big smile on my face and I know it. I'm a complete filthy slut and I know it. Filthy doesn't even begin to describe me.
"You don't have to do it," he says. I just look up at him, and then start sucking that cock clean. I can taste the cum and blood and everything else. He gets hard again. I just keep going until he's clean.
He kind of laughs at me. "I meant with a towel," he says. "Sure you did," I tell hiim. Maybe he did mean with a towel. He didn't actually say to suck him. That was all my idea.
"Make me cum," I tell him. "What?" he says. I explain to him that I've cum for him a couple times, but by myself. I can make myself cum without him if I really want to.
He gets down on the floor with me and starts fingering me. Kissing me. Sucking me. Using his fingers and mouth he does me... expertly. This guy knows what he's doing - better than any boy I've been with. He just touches me in ways I couldn't have imagine.
He makes me cum.. and keeps going. Fifteen minutes later I cum again... and he keeps going. After 4 or 5 orgasms ... and about an hour... he stops and asks me if I've had enough.
"For now," I tell him. I get dressed and go home. On the way out I tell him I'll be back in a few days. I don't ask about a wife or girlfriend. I just don't want to know. The funny thing is, part of me hopes he does have a girlfriend, but I really don't know why.
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So my story starts a couple weeks ago... just after school let out. To celebrate I got my belly button pierced and bought the smallest f-in bikini I could find... no joke.
I'm not going to lie and say I'm the hotest girl out there. I'm not even the best looking in my group of friends. But I love turning heads if I can. I like a few stares. Is it wrong? Some people thing so. But forget them. I love it.
And I'm also honest. The only reason I got my belly button pierced was to give guys something to stare at. I know it works.
So I head off to the pool with a bunch of my friends. I've got my tiny, tiny suit on, which a couple of my friends think is just too much. One goes as far as to tell me it's obscene. I gotta admit, she might be right. I certainly hope she is.
Bad news. No guys. Ok, scratch that. One guy - about 40 years old. Decent looking, but overweight. Other than that, me, my friends, and 3 other girls.
I really think that most of the other girls are better looking than I am. Certainly my one friend is - with her massive boobs that attracted all the boys. The other girls at the pool are looking good too.
But that one guy is checking me and my slutsuit (I started calling it a slutsuit instead of swimsuit because it's so small). And I kinda like it. It makes me feel good. Sexual. Slutty. And horny.
Time passes. Maybe an hour. Then he gets up and leaves. I watch him go for a few minutes, and then ... cooly ... go follow him. I leave my stuff at the pool and tell my friends to watch it. I need to go back to the apartment to check my e-mail I tell them.
I catch up to him and start talking, flirting shamelessly with a guy twice my age. He's pretty shameless too, and gets right to business. Somehow we start talking about porn. Yeah. Porn. Go figure. And then we're heading back to his place to watch some.
I'm thinking "Holy shit! This is f-in insane", but I'm also horny as all get out. I'm almost shaking.
We get to his place, snuggle up on his couch, and start watching some porn on his laptop. He asks me if I'm interested in the hardcore stuff and I tell him to "bring it!" It's kind of a challenge that I don't want to back down from, but I'm also really curious.
The first clip is of a girl tied in some crazy position, so bent over she could probably lick her pussy. It's insane, yet really sexy. Some guy is whipping her pussy with a whip or something. She's screaming, but somehow I find it really hot. The clip is maybe 5 minutes. The next one is similar. Another girl tied in some crazy position, but some woman is doing her pussy and ass with lit candles.
I'm totally blown away, but I'm loving it. I'm a little shocked that I'm loving it, but it's really turning me on. At the same time, I'm feeling really comfortable with myself because he's liking it too. I feel like I"m not the only freak in the world.
The girl starts begging for the other girl to let her cum. Further hotness that's making me want to drool. I say something like "I think I might be wanting to cum too", but my host plays it cool. He tells me to get undressed (I am so there) and play with myself.
I've never played with myself while someone else was there, but it sounded incredibly hot so I just started doing it. He asks me if I'm ready for more clips, and I am.
The next two clips are girls having sex with bottles. WTF? The first girl is squating down a big wine bottle stuffing it way inside her. The second girl is using a beer bottle, but the BOTTOM end. I'm totally shocked than anyone would have sex with a bottle, and amazed at how the one girl could shove the big end inside her. I say WOW about 500 times.
And I also like it. I'm getting hornier and hornier, and honestly wondering what it would be like to have a bottle inside me.
He asks me if I want to keep going. I don't even hesitate. I want more, and I want it more extreme.
This time it's urine. Again. Wow. The first clip has a girl drinking a glass of water, then lowering the glass between her legs. She pees, then brings it up to her mouth and drinks it. It's all one smooth shot - to cuts or anything - so it couldn't possibly be faked. Part of me said that I *shoud* think it's gross or wrong or something, but I don't. I think it's really hot. In the second clip a girl pees in a bowl and then drinks it. Wow.
I'm blown away, and totally horny. I think it's time for some action and say something to the guy. He asks me which clip I liked best. Even though he didn't say it, I know he's asking me which one I want to act out. I tell him I loved them all. It's not a lie. He says just pick one.
I tell him I'm a virgin, so I doubt I could stuff a bottle inside me. Then I tell him we just met, so I'm not going to let him tie me up so I'm helpless. Then I realize what's left, and I'm suddenly overwhelmed with a powerful feeling of sexiness. Slutiness. Filthiness. Something.
I know what's coming, and I want it.
I tell him that I guess I'll need a big glass of water.
He gets it for me. I drink it. I lower it between my legs. My hand is trembling ... with sexual excitement. No fear. No nervousness. I'm just too f-in turned on.
I pee in the glass. It's HOT. Not sexy hot. Urine is hot. I had no idea. I lift the glass to my mouth and stop. The smell is a bit much. I know that it's going to be difficult, but I want it. I go for it, and just chug it. I know if I stop I'll never finish. Somehow I get to the end.
It was digusting, horrible, awful. I wouldn't wish my worst enemy to have to drink their own piss. But man it felt so good!
I offered my host a blow job, but he says he wants me to cum first, on my own. The idea seems naughty as all get out, so I go for it and cum pretty easily. I was so turned on it took about 2 minutes.
I give him his blow job, put on my slut suit, and head back to the pool. I'm feeling like a million bucks - the most sexy, sluty, princess, queen, goddess, whatever. I'm the sexiest girl in the world, and my friends have no idea.
For the next several days, I'm horny as hell just thinking about it.
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| Age: 23 |
| Galveston,
Texas |
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