4 years from here on out. seems like the past 8 years have kicked all our asses. the overall populous sitting in melodic mediocrity and and blinding apathy, defeatists abroad and ignorance being not only encouraged, but rewarded...I think we all said something tonight: that enough is enough. Good on us. IT'S ABOUT TIME!!!

what the hell took so long?

i've been so frustrated/ criminally insane by our overall acceptance of the way things went since 2000...especially since 2001. I will never forget how most of the people around me just sat there and accepted it, and discouraged or even actively fought any attempt otherwise. But tonight that changed.

what now?

Now we act on it, don't sit on ur ass expecting Obama to do it for you. He'll do his part it seems...so do yours, and behave like a god damn self sustaining life form you emotional cripples... Own your shit and own your lives, and take the responsibility on your own self. Because I for one am sick of it being acceptable to be passive or indifferent about your own lives and the lives around you, both in principle and reality.

years from now i'll look back in disgust at the social virus that swept this country, and i'll remeber how i felt tonight, as we united as a country, not to elect a man, but to reclaim our honor, our worth, our minds...i'll remember how we took the fist dose of the cure.

Here's to four years my darlings. four years of holding a man to his words and not placing them in his mouth. four years of supporting the meaning, the country, and the reality of the United States of America. The world looks to us, because were worth looking at. So fucking act like it. Your an American.

heres to four years of saying that with pride and not delusions of righteousness! cheers!!!!!

-Love

So today was a sad day to end what was a mindblowing weekend.

After much thought (and tears) Master has uncollared me. My schedule just doesn't allow me to travel the distance it takes to see Him. When it came down to it i had to make the choice of extreams, choose between him, or my entire vanilla life.

It is unfortaunet they had to clash like that, and it was not a choice i enjoyed making...but i did, and i'm trying not to go blind from dehydration of the eyes.

Master pointed out that i should sort of let people peek into my life here on collarme, and as Him being Amazing and all, i figure he is certainly correct. (i would have done it anyways, hehe^_^).

Nearly three months. Three months of being in Master's ownership (DomTopLB here on collarme). Three A-freaken-mazing months.

An example of this being this weekend, in which we had a busy, but fun time.

Friday was nice because we went to a party with the fem-sub we've been playing with (who is apparently moving...boo) and due to her 'curfew' missed out on the play afterwards (which thanks to Master, is always mind blowing). The party was ok...but, meh, not my thing, and the people were somewhat boring to me.

What was really interesting was before the party, where i nearly had a mental breakdown over this feud i was having with my ex Mistress, who is also my roommate along with two other vanilla males. But Master was there to the rescue, and certainly put much in perspective for me, the fire in my brain was cooled. Servicing Master certainly has its perks as a sub. I think it's because He is a very smart man, yes, but though He won't admit it, he is very caring and gentle as well.

Saturday was a much nicer party, for me anyways, because it was a leather party held by Avatar, and this was our first into to their parties. My body is getting back into its groove as far as being beaten and bruised. I'm always fascinated and perplexed, and yet i understand by the fact of being a masochist in a clinical sense, by the way the body and specifically, my body responds to pain and conditioning physically and psychologically as someone is beating me. i remember a time when i could take a lot...i mean A-freaking-LOT...and i've found that the more a Dom understands what i am and how i work as a subbie, and a masochist, the more rewarding it can be for both parties during play...because, hey, i like to feel the pain, and my tears will reflect that, and when i go into my sub-space, a lot of suffering, and fear, and rage, and hatred and love and all the juicy stuff boils to the surface and it is an amazingly intimate and open experience to me...sharing that is important to me, and i love that Master can appreciate that for what it is. I find a lot of clarity in those moments, and it's odd, but hey, it's me. It's something that completes the circuit of who i am and it allows me to accept not only the pain physically and emotionally, but excepting that pain from Master as his gift to me, beating His boy's naked flesh so that i may suffer for Him, and blossom in reddened skins and blackened bruises...it is so nice to once again be beaten out of joy and love, and to love it, take it and accept it as i accept Him as my Master and myself as a human being, and as His. It's like being given wings and being taught to fly...that's the metaphor i usually use when i describe what it is like to be a sub to the vanilla folk who inquire, and i use it because it's how it makes me feel. It's made so much sweeter when you trust the person.

Alas until i am able to live with Master our time spent together is on a clock's razor and Sunday rears its head to say hey, work is tomorrow...But we enjoyed it none the less, because of the joy that is Carnal Carnival!! Master wasn't psyched about going at first because of the distance from him, and he'd been running around like crazy all weekend, but once there and meeting up with friends a good time was had. (The darts left lil welts on my bum...he he they are still there).
We got in free because we were helpful kinksters and worked a bit for the fair, then had our fun...though if that's work, i wish it paid, cause it was fun too, he he.

Master's friends are interesting people...and i like that master allows me to share my thoughts and engage others in conversation. 

I said something at dinner that i had not mentioned in a long while, and that was that as a whole, due to the puritan cultures being high in power through the world, Sex is no longer considered the art form that it truly is, there fore neglect it's properties and abilities, and even the varied and beautiful art that sex can be is like a pair of old Nikes...cheap, stiff, rubbery and mass produced...and i hate it... It's an art so old, so powerful it is necessary to our production, yet...as one of Master's friends said, it is merely wankery today...not to mention peoples in ability to understand safe(er) sex...*sigh*...At least i'm understanding more about what i'm about and what that means for me, and how i can use it in my service to Master and to bring him joy and fulfillment.

Until next time...

-Love   

PS
 to those who i keep forgetting to call...i'm calling after i post. Promise.

It is not often BDSM and it's participants get a fair shake when it comes to our portrayal in the media mainstream, as well as the public eye itself.

Often times people concentrate too deeply on the premise that it is an oddity, or aberration, never addressing the fact that a overwhelming amount of people either are in the lifestyle, dabble in it, or would love to participate in it. There is no concentration on the people themselves, no character study or interactivity to which the lifestyle thrives. Too often are the roles portrayed as stale misinterpretations.

 Submissives are almost always woman, who are ditzy ,incapable and easily overwhelmed, and when men are portrayed in the submissive role, it's like they are some kind of angst ridden perverts that need to get our jollies. There is no respect to their dominants, or the serenity that accompanies their relationship to a dominant.

when it comes to Dominant Women, they are always a insecure swanky babe in leather whose some object of lust of this perverse world. There is no depth, only a controlling gal in boots straps. Where is her intellect, her keen sense of her surroundings and empowerment? And when it comes to Male dominants, on the rare occasion that they are portrayed, they are creepy, and often times villains. This puzzles me. Most Dominants (Male and Female), are pretty amazing people. Not only amazing in their normality, but in their expressiveness and depth as people. The same goes for many submissives.

It's not that this is a pressing issue in today’s society,(it's hard to be relevant when people normally ignore it) but it's simply an aspect of our society that is unjustly stigmatized. It's an elephant in the room that no one really acknowledges. It can crush a reputation, ruin family relationships, and even lead to ousting of social circles. When people learn about my lifestyle, they feel they have a right and duty to treat less then they did a few moments ago, even to the point of outright disrespect. This is depressing to experience, as well as hurtful.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this matter everyone, mainly because it's something that I could use many different perspectives on.

Thank you for reading.

-Love

I wish to make it clear that I in no way have any intrest in "topping from bottom" seeing as it adverse to my nature.

I also have no interest in wasting anyones time.

I would like to meet friends on collarme. So feel free to contact even without persuit of my submission. Lord knows I need the stimulation in this thing i call my head.