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Well it looks like My patience payed off. I had My doubts and even packed away all My gear that I use for playing. I had given up on even finding one for Me. I'm glad that she didn't give up, it's good to see such dedication. This type of dedication deserves to be rewarded. she knows who she is and she should be proud of herself. she's rare and one of a kind. |
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I'm tired of non serious slaves. I've had it with slaves saying yes they're serious and want to meet now and then never commit. Tired of slaves saying they can't wait to play and then never committing. Tired of looking for slaves. I'll just be alone until the one I know is ready. she and I always clicked and got along and have even met. |
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I see a lot of profiles of sub/slaves that seem to have the same wants and limits as I do but it seems that they aren't interested or have their attention elsewhere. If any of you subs or slaves have or are passing Me by, I'd appreciate some feedback because I haven't been able to get any answers from A/anyone regarding this. I don't care if I get humiliated or criticized about anything. I will be respectful and polite. I'm just at a loss and if I'm doing something wrong I'd like to correct it.
Thanx
XT. |
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I fixed the problem with the pics of My last truck (that I wrecked 3-1-09) so now all can see what happens when a full sized Dodge truck comes in contact with a fixed object. I will say this though...... I was wearing My seat belt and it saved Me from injury and death. If A/anyone has questions feel free to send an email and ask.
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On March 1 2009 I had an accident while driveng and totaled My truck. I uploaded a couple of pics after the accident. I'm ok and gettong back to work after the Dr's said I could but I'm going to have to get used to standing for 8 hrs again. WEAR YOUR SEAT BELTS P/people!!! I walked away from this accident with just a black eye and a sore shoulder. I hit a pole at 45 mph and then My truck rolled.
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I look at the beginnings of another year and still My search continues for the one that will be by My side, not be online. There is a difference and a need to have a true slave to care and love and be loved and served by her. Hopefully I will find one soon that is compatible and able to relocate.
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I just wanted to let My F/friends know that I'm still around and yes still looking. |
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Due to the overwhelming responses that most subs and slaves get I'm not going to send out relentless emails to those that aren't interested in Me. Rather I encourage them to email Me if interested in chatting and seeing if W/we might be compatible. |
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I've often told friends how important the little things are in life,
how the person inside the body will outlive the beauty and perfection on the outside.
how much fun a slave can be and the pleasures can be overwhelming and mind boggling but the laughter, interaction, that smile she wears, that smile He wears, all those little things that make life worth living and so much fun.
I just hope there's no pain, I've built enough walls in My life and I don't like being suspiscious of E/everyone. I'd prefer to trust. |
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I just want to make one thing clear. For all the slaves that are looking for relocation money to come to Me. I have an idea, tell Me where in the USA you are and I'll come get you. I've heard the stories of money sent and never hearing back from a sub or slave and have even lost a few dollars Myself yrs ago. It won't happen again. If this is a deal breaker then I guess there never really was a deal to begin with. I refuse to send any money overseas and this is due to those that are seeking money with no intention of ever coming to be with Me. If you are serious and really want to be My slave then you can borrow the money and I will repay it when you are here with Me. |
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Sometimes our hearts yearn, and crave things that are difficult to explain.
Sometimes it's the soft, tender, moments that causes the frenzy that drives our mind crazy.
Sometimes it's so hard to find the one that we all dream of and can't wait to find.
Sometimes the choices seem so clear, yet so difficult.
Sometimes Love is found in wonderful, yet unsuspecting places and people. |
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Why is it sooo hard to find a slave that's a REAL slave as in old world values and behavior? A slave that knows that a sadistic Master will indeed cause pain with His wants and desires. I seek one that needs to be fullfilled in this way and is ready for real life, is serious and not playing games, is ready to start relocating as soon as she determines I'm the One for her and not 4 yrs down the road. A slave that will keep in touch and not dissapear off the face of the earth after several weeks. |
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The person using the name XTslilbaby is not My slave and I wish to make this clear. This is the same person that uses the name slavegirlntx and is in no way associated with Me. |
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I'm sure that A/all who knew the slave stormie remembers her as one that allways had a kind word and was allways willing to help. stormie is a friend and for A/all that know her she's asked that I pass along the following info;
stormie is in the hospital and recovery will be long and extensive. It may be awhile before stormie is online again and she may not be able to stay online long as she will be using a friends computer because hers was destroyed. she asks that you keep her in Y/your prayers and thoughts.
If there is A/anyone that wishes Me to relay a message or thought send Me an email and in the text just address it to stormie and I will see to it that she receives all cards and emails as I'll be sending her a letter to keep in touch once a couple times a month. |
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I sit and look, for just that one and she eludes Me. I realize that even she has a life to live but that still doesn't make Me any less alone, any less empty. Then I hear that faint tune of My friend (My cat) as if he hears or feels My emptiness and has come to console Me. I often wonder how he knows. |
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I wanted to say that there are many real and exciting I/individuals here as well as M/many that aren't. I know this is an opinion and W/we all have them but it's nice to be able to chat with T/those that can say and do mean what T/they feel. |
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I've had it!! I'm tired of sending out emails with a considerate polite message and a welcome only to have them deleted unread. From now on if any subs or slaves want to get to know Me or have questions you better email Me. I'm tired of players and only wish to hear from those who are serious. I'm still in control here so My friends can relax. |
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It has been some time since I've shared My feelings, but I allways find that it helps in some ways to get it out. I've been dissappointed by one I gave an assignment to. Not only was the assignment not done but no mention of explanation was even offered in any way. This is in itself similiar to a mutiny. When one decides to rebel and thinks nothing of assigned tasks then in essence it sends a message to the One that assigned those tasks. It shows a true lack of respect but also raises the question of why. So much that isn't clear needs to be and I await the answers. I will not take action until I've received an explanation, but for one to not even ask for an extension gives but one explanation. |
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It allways amazes Me how life deals us they hands that W/we play. I often wonder W/who's doing the dealing and if I can tip T/them (maybe get more than just a pair of 4's). |
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I've recently added a few new pics showing My buddy. I found him when he was just a day or two old and were it not for a higher power causing Me to hit a stick with the lawn mower he would have been just a spot in the grass. That was Aug of 2001, and the last few pics were taken last year on his birthday and I'll no doubt take more this year as he thinks of Me as his parent and I relish all the attention and love he gives Me, for without it I can only imagine what I'd turn into. He shows Me everyday that there's hope and he and I need each other. I will say that cat's can learn English as Mine knows what I mean when I talk to him. It wasn't easy and I'm sure very confusing for him at first but he knows many key words and what they mean. He's also teaching Me to speak meowese as he comes to Me and will sit and meow the same way over and over again until I get up and then walk to what he wanted Me to see. So it's an ongoing learning process that reminds Me of what happens when 2 P/people meet and enter a relationship. It's a learning process that has to go both ways. The Top has to learn what the bottom likes and dislikes as well as what works and doesn't work etc. The bottom has to do the same but also learn all of what the Top wants them to be and do. |
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It eludes Me how with all of the emotions that are within U/us the emotions that W/we most often remember best is the worst of times. Why can't W/we see the best, be the best. Is that not what W/we strive to be? I see and feel the emotions as they become but a filament of time as the hours turn to days, the days to weeks and so on. I see those that seek, and those that are. I see the dreamers, and those that are dreamt of. I see where I've been, where I am, and wonder where I'll be.
I often wonder if W/we as a society of races on this world aren't meant to be full of predators and prey. I see how the bear hunts the salmon and feeds on it. This along with other predators of nature help to prevent overpopulation of the salmon. Are humans meant to control population in this way or is it really possible to have peaceful solutions. So the only conclusion so far is that Life is still full of wonders, large and small, near and far. Like Love a wonder is still as precious be it a little or a lot. Sometimes an idle mind can seem like such an enemy, but a mind is such a precious and unique abyss. |
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I sometimes get depressed because it seems as though there aren't many slaves that are willing to relocate to St Louis. This makes Me wonder why and I welcome any comments or opinions on this matter.
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I've allways wondered why some people do and some don't learn from mistakes but more importantly realize that by holding onto the anger of the past, the lessons learned cannot be implemented because the anger gets in the way. There are many P/people that have infuriated Me in the past but unlike Bearsangel I choose to let them do T/their thing and I do Mine. I learn from My mistakes and don't hold onto the past. dianne I hope that you mature and again remind you that this is a classic example of why I turned you down as My slave. |
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lilgirllost has never met Me nor has had any contact other than her sending Me 2 emails and Me sending 1 .... who's the player and fake lilgirllost? lol I love drama. |
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I love how lilgirllost has decided I'm dangerous after I refused her snippy little request. Oh well the important people know how I really am so I'm not worried. Can't stop the real idiots anyway. |
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I seek one to be Mine and to be with Me,
I seek one to want what I want,
Where can she be? |
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I do thank all who have responded but I still seek that special one and since I have been having problems getting into the chatroom I am forced to chat outside of the Collarme site. I am serious about My quest for a live in slave. |
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Just an FYI to all subs/slaves that have had problems with others, I don't stalk, belittle, degrade, or harrass A/anyone as it is a waste of time, energy and is a childish, immature way to show the world that O/one has a closed mind. Even if things don't work out and I want them to, if a submissive or slave finds that I'm not the right one for her then just say so and let's get on with O/our lives. I've seen so many notes and references to being put down or chastized because one is not interested. Remember that subs and slaves are more than just pieces of meat on an auction block and do have the right to choose O/one that is right for them as well. The domination in any relationship should not begin until after B/both agree to it. One can only hope for increased intelligence. |
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I seem to be having a problem using the chatrooms. I've sent an email to support but no response so if anyone else has had a similiar experience with Windows XP (Home Version) please let Me know. I can get the menu showing the menu of chatrooms available as well as the emoticons above but alas no chatrooms. |
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I often wonder why some just disappear when chatting without so much as a goodbye or to say i'm not interested etc.
I want A/all to know that if A/anyone finds that T/they are not interested or don't wish My company that's fine, I'm a big boy and I know these things exist. I can take it and if A/anyone doesn't want Me to contact them be an adult and at least let Me know so I don't end up sending emails wondering what happened or why etc. I'm not the type that is vengefull or harrasses A/anyone. |
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I am still seeking a 24/7 fem slave for TPE & LTR who can relocate to Me. No children or pets allowed. |
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