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| To me, being a Dom is about who you are as a person. The whole you. It isn’t about having a Dom outfit, or having a Dom way of speaking - it’s much deeper than that. It has to come from within.; it’s a part of who you are; and it’s the person you were born, not a role you’ve created. It isn’t roleplay, it’s your reason for existing.
But D/s isn’t just about the Dom - the sub is equally as important. In my view Ds should never resemble mental abuse. It’s about a loving caring relationship between two people who happen to be Dom and sub as well as lovers and friends. Within that environment I believe submission can enhance a person, making them find their true potential, not treating them like a second class citizen.
I like subs that value themselves, that recognise that they have a voice, and realise that the gift of submission is the greatest gift they can give to a Dom. I also like a sub that appreciates that relationships don’t just happen overnight. They take time to build, and the best relationships always develop rather than remain static. I love to develop with a sub, learning from, and with each other.
Finally, although this may all sound quite deep (and apologies for that), I should stress that while being a Dom is at my core, it is still only a part of who I am. I love photography, writing, all sorts of night classes (just about to start Ballroom dancing classes), as well as the theatre, galleries, people watching and spending too much time in the bar at Lords. On my wish list is to spend a night in a haunted house or castle (is that a dungeon fixation reappearing) and see a ghost!
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