Well its been about two years since I updated this so I guess I should... I'm a senior now in college graduating in about 5 months and can't wait. Still waiting to here back from vet school but my interveiw went well so hopefully I'll know soon. Until then its an annoying waiting game.

Funeral's are always a good time to think. About life, about death, and about who you really care about and who really cares about you. My grandmother just died and this weekend has been hard and today was her funeral. None of my friends came, and I was there alone with my parents and younger brother. So it leads me to think and to ponder who really cares about me. People that tell me they love me and that I have been there for don't come, and don't really care that they didn't. And its funny because some people say they need you to be there more...and then the one time you really want them where are they...

'Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Someone to love with my life in their hands.
There has gotta be somebody for me
Ohhhhhh.


Nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.
Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?
There `s gotta be somebody for me out there.

Nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?
There has gotta be somebody for me out there.

<3 Sums up How I feel right now..kinda

"What if i'm not a superhero. What if I am the bad guy." ~ Edward from Twilight

Yes I have read all the books and for the record after reading Twilight, I had all the other books pre-ordered before they came out..not like a lot of people that are just getting into it....or will be getting into it after the movie comes out.

This actually has no meaning at all, just the meaning that I think its important...and so I'm writting it down. So in conclusion I could tell you that my Rats are getting on my nerves this week..fighting and everything. But at the same time I could tell you that I am home for the weekend and get to see my dogs that I miss like crazy when I'm at school.

And yes none of this will help you if you are trying to read this and get to know me..except that fact that I have two rats, and three dogs that I miss very much. Although I also have three cats, and two iguana's at home that I also love very much and miss when I am at school.

So that is all I really have to say except that I am sadden because of the fact that real guys are nothing like characters in books. And if I find a guy like Edward...I would fight for the death for him. Because he is a true gentleman, yet a Dom..in his own way. Depending on how you feel toward him as opposed to Jacob ( the werewolf). 

In a way its a battle between Vampire..and werewolf. Or class over boyish charm. Or cold vs  hot. :P 

well off to bed and done ranting.. in a way of speaking

"I'm gunna live my life, I can't ever run and hide. I won't compromise cause I'll never know."  That quote is from a song and I think that it explains me fairly well right now in my life. I have a few things going on such as College, Friends, Family, and my pets. I need someone that can fit in to my life..and most importantly know that my school, and friends come first in my life. Now maybe this isn't the right mind set that i should be in. But my goals stand as Vet School, than starting a practice, and once that's stable a family. I have known since I was about 9 that I wanted to be a Vet.

Since that has not changed I know it is what I am meant to be, but I do want a family when that time comes. I am only 19 so I am not the most mature person in the world but I have my pirorities staight in my mind, and just want someone that can respect them and me.

I am not going to change them for anyone there is another old quote...or maybe its just from facebook. "True Love will wait." Now...I don't know if there even is true love anymore but if there is..and that quote holds true than my dark prince will understand and wait.