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Friends:
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There is nothing obscene, about two people in a bedroom trying to find in sadomasochistic sex the symbolic solution to their sexual aggressions
-- Anne Rice


Determining what the value of a relationship is often more difficult than making the relationship work. I am continually searching for the idea that will bind my desires with the one who can help me fulfill them.

I am not a sadist (but sometimes I am attracted to that aspect of life). I highly value the role of women in society. Their contributions are under-rated, but where they shine, for me, is in their overwhelming ability to give men (and me) pleasure -- both physically and mentally (the mental part is where my sadist side seems to come out).

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1/4/2012 3:07:34 PM

Whatever you are, be it completely - with abandon, with passion, without fear or restraint. Whilst many people may be fairly good at being normal, only you can be extraordinary at being who you are. The gift that each of us carries is our uniqueness - yet it is so often hidden deep beneath layers of fear, uncertainty, ignorance and self-loathing. Yet that uniqueness gives us our purpose, our fulfillment and our true joy.

If you’re a slut, be a slut. A sadistic bastard, be a sadistic bastard. A whore should always be a whore. The challenge is to uncover our true selves, and then learn to express that self in best and wisest of all ways, so that it enhances us and all those we interact with. This may take a little practice, but early mistakes should not deviate us from our aim of expressing ourselves in our purist, most complete, form. Certainly we may struggle to find those others that we need with us to do those things that we need to do - but the surest way to ensure we never encounter companions for our journey is to never begin the journey in the first place. Write, post, speak, as your true self. Give those who need you for their journey the best possible chance of finding you


2/9/2011 5:22:58 AM

"There is a great streak of violence in every human being. If it is not channeled and understood, it will break out in war or in madness." ~ Sam Peckinpah 


12/22/2010 1:12:08 PM
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS (BDSM STYLE)

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the domain,
Not a subbie was stirring, (they were tied down with chain)
The shackles were hung by the chimney with care,
And the St. Andrews cross stood empty and bare.

The subbies were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of floggers danced in their heads;
The Dom in his leather, and I in my slave cap,
Had just settled down after getting our whacks.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I crept from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew very quickly.
Tripped over some handcuffs and cursed soft and thickly.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my sleep-crusted eyes should unfurl,
But a miniature sleigh, pulled by eight pony girls,

With a Dominant driver, so forbidding and stern,
I knew in a moment I’d a great deal to learn.
More rapid than eagles his pony girls came,
And he whipped them, and shouted, and called them by name;

“Now, dashslave! now, danceslave! now, pranceslave and switch!
On, subbie! on slavegirl! on, slavepet and bitch!
To the top of the porch! to the training room wall!
And I’ll redden your bottoms, should one of you fall!

As terrified tears before the cat-o-nine flow,
When they meet with an obstacle, gather courage and go,
So up to the house-top the pony girls flew,
With the sleigh full of sex toys, and the Dominant too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of pony girl boots.
As I drew in my head with a sense of forbode,
In through the front door the Dominant strode.

He was dressed all in black, from his head to his feet,
And his clothes were all studded, leathered and neat.
A bundle of sex toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked very menacing opening his pack.

His eyes, they were hard with a definite glower
His countenance cold, and I quite felt his power.
His sternly set mouth bespoke no reprieve,
For the unlucky subbie who caused him to grieve.

The goatee he sported lent a devilish air
As did the slight spatter of gray in his hair.
He had strong pectorals and a muscular torso.
That hardened and flexed and gave force to each blow.

He was lean, stern and fit, quite the Dom of my dreams,
And I wanted to serve him, so went down on my knees.
He looked down upon me, with a turn of his head,
He made my soul tremble while my heart filled with dread;

He spoke not a word, but put me to straight to work,
He watched me in silence, idly tapping his quirt.
“Heel me,” he commanded, the lone words he would say,
And he stalked out the door as I rushed to obey.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team cracked the whip,
Pulled me ‘cross his knee, where i hung scared and limp.
And he whispered to me, “I shall teach you a lesson.
Happy Christmas, new slave; tonight we shall session.”

10/17/2010 4:46:45 AM

Love well, whip well. - Benjamin Franklin


10/16/2010 3:55:29 AM
Sometimes the greatest bondage requires no rope, chains, or leather, but only desire. Build the desire until they NEED more, and then just quietly tell then what they need to do to earn their orgasm.

10/15/2010 6:36:53 AM
The true strength of a woman is not measured by her compliance to being shackled to a bed that becomes a fortress of solitude, but her willingness to submit her very heart and very soul.

10/12/2010 8:38:24 AM

When the slave is ready, the Master will APPEAR


10/4/2010 8:39:46 AM
It seems to be that this site is for voyeurs, because no one seems real here.

4/27/2010 6:15:15 AM
Yes, submissive… Because she’s been spanked and now witnessed her master kissing another woman… And she’ll be punish again for watching instead of cleaning the house…

4/6/2010 5:47:59 AM
Coffee Sometime

“Can we meet for coffee sometime?”

This was the wrong thing to ask.  Our relationship was about sex and we both knew it.  There was nothing else asked for and nothing else allowed.  We met when we could.  Often it was before a night out, or sometimes even on a lazy morning before brunch with friends, but it was always just sex.

We didn’t even know each other’s last names but after two months I made the mistake of thinking I knew her.  I thought she must be feeling the same way by now and she must be longing for just a bit more.  Even just a hint of friendship would be a welcome change.

She was lying next to me on her stomach when I asked, stretched out like a cat in the sun. She ran a hand up my thigh, scratching me lightly with her nails.  She knew just how to make me shiver.  She leaned in closer as her hand wrapped around my now hardening cock.  She squeezed me tightly and twisted her hips so I could see the soft curve of her ass over her shoulder.  She took me perfectly into her mouth and flicked her tongue over me until I cried out.

She paused and looked up at me. “You can have this.  Or you can have coffee.”

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, completely surprised that I was actually going to make a decision.

3/17/2010 1:07:49 PM
I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over.  Out on the edge you see all the kinds of things you can't see from the center.  -- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

 

3/15/2010 8:52:28 AM
Some girls you date. Others, you leave on their knees with their hands cuffed around the base of the toilet with their skirt pushed up around their waist, just in case you need to use them.

2/23/2010 6:52:52 AM
“One of the pleasant things about owning a slave,is the opportunity to converse with her, to listen to her, to hear her express herself, her feelings and ideas. One can learn much from a slave. Many slaves, are highly intelligent. They can express themselves articulately, clearly, trenchantly, and lyrically. It is a great pleasure to talk with them. Then when one wishes, one puts them again on their knees.”



2/21/2010 7:16:33 AM

Thou goest to woman? Forget not thy whip.
~ Nietzche


2/14/2010 9:33:53 AM
There is a lovely contrast in the elegance of a bdsm relationship. A master who very politely (and with sincere concern) inquires to his submissive if her cuffs are comfortable as he prepares his flogger - which they both know he will indeed use with deft precision and skill. Her discomfort and pain will be focused only on where he decides it should be targeted. If and when she should be pleasured, that also would be by the master's choice. Her desires are often so strong she literally needs to be bound so he can focus them for her, and this in paradox is a freedom she can't experience any other way. There is almost a poetry in the relationship. She belongs to a master in body and soul and while he may take great pleasure in creating new ways to torture her, he would never allow her to be hurt. People who know this, know what this means.

2/8/2010 2:18:59 PM

"The only woman worth seeing undressed is the one you have undressed yourself."

-- The Duchess of Windsor


2/8/2010 1:49:38 PM
"She knew that fear was useless, that he would do what he wished, that the decision was his, that he left nothing possible to her except the thing she wanted most - to submit." -- Ayn Rand

1/5/2010 2:24:59 PM

A Collar

A collar in BDSM symbolizes a commitment that has often been compared to a wedding ring. This type of commitment comes in other forms, such as a brand, a tattoo, a piercing…. Each symbolizing the pledge of the Dominant to their submissive to protect, love and cherish them. When the submissive accepts the collar, the submissive surrenders to the Dominant and makes a promise to be devoted and loyal. Some collars are made with no clasp to signify the never ending love of the relationship. Other collars have a ring to attach a leash and a place for an engraved tag or pendant to show ownership. The collar is to be worn in the presence of the Dominant at all times. When apart, all the submissive needs to do is touch it to be reminded of the bond they share. Each collaring is a unique symbol of love, respect and a bond between two people who care greatly for each other


1/5/2010 2:19:19 PM

There are things that happen in the dark between two people that make everything that happens in the light seem all right

Erica Jong


12/15/2009 8:46:46 AM

On being a true submissive

 Be vulnerable. Your scene is a two-way street. It is not just the physical realization of your prior fantasies. If you want to limit your experience to certain physical and psychological stimulation, then contract with your top ahead of time. But don’t always expect your top to be a puppet in a fantasy play you’ve written in your head. It’s far better to let your top surprise you, to extend your limits, to take you to places you’re never been before. When you trust your top completely, let her or him know it, and let him or her guide you into new fantasies.


12/15/2009 8:45:13 AM

On being a true submissive

Be humble. You may be God’s or Goddess’ gift to the world and the most sought after prize in town, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunity to show how good you are. No matter what you claim, the “real you” will show through in a scene. Don’t set yourself up for failure by developing expectations that you know you and your top can never reach.


12/14/2009 11:49:14 AM

On being a true submissive

Be realistic. Your dominant is human, and even the most experienced tops have moments of awkwardness and indecision. Don’t call attention to what you perceive as a lapse. Know the difference between reality and the fantasy world you see in books and magazines. Few tops are rich enough to afford a large dungeon with a lavish layout of equipment. Your top’s equipment is expensive - respect it and don’t abuse it.


12/14/2009 11:47:19 AM

On being a true submissive

Be honest. Don’t be afraid to share your needs and fantasies. Your dominant expects it. Honesty about your wants, health concerns, and turn-offs is essential to a good scene. Lying or being less than candid can only lead to problems, as the top will base the scene on inaccurate information. Besides causing problems, it can be dangerous.


12/14/2009 11:39:52 AM

On being a true submissive

Communicate! Verbalization is necessary, but at the appropriate time and in the appropriate way. Your top needs to know basic information about you, such as experiences, fantasies, health concerns, and turn-offs. But - unless it’s an emergency - wait until your top asks. Don’t expect your dominant to be a mind-reader who instinctively knows your needs, wants, and limits. Your cooperation will enhance the scene for both of you.


12/14/2009 11:39:23 AM

On being a true submissive

Be patient! A potential top will let you know if she or he is interested in you or not. Keep in mind that your purpose as a submissive is to serve and to satisfy someone who will take into consideration the realization of your fantasies. Don’t expect your top to be able to turn on like a light switch. The timing must be right for both of you.


12/14/2009 11:38:34 AM

On being a true submissive

Be open. You can learn something about SM and about yourself from everyone into the scene, no matter how experienced or inexperienced they are, or how dominant or submissive they are. SM is a very personal art, and an “I already know it all” attitude will make you miss valuable SM lessons and experiences, and ignore potentially valuable SM friends


12/14/2009 11:37:22 AM

On being a true submissive

Be really submissive! This is the whole point. Let your dominant take you over completely. Don’t coach or second guess or be critical of your top. Exchange information on your special needs before the scene starts, but once it starts be quiet! If you insist on running a scene to your own specifications, then you should try being a top. You have agreed to limitations of your own power. Stay within those limitations. Respect and obey your top and expect punishment if you don’t. Accept it gracefully and cheerfully. Your top has many things to be concerned with, including your safety and what turns you on. Be loyal and dependable and enjoy your role.


12/7/2009 1:13:41 PM
Hotlanta Kink Test Score: 777

11/20/2009 9:44:16 AM
Why is it so difficult to find people here?  I see so many that are looking... submissive women and couples... are any of you real?

Oh well, another rant that no one reads.

10/20/2009 10:37:04 AM

On being a true submissive

Be really submissive! This is the whole point. Let your dominant take you over completely. Don’t coach or second guess or be critical of your top. Exchange information on your special needs before the scene starts, but once it starts be quiet! If you insist on running a scene to your own specifications, then you should try being a top. You have agreed to limitations of your own power. Stay within those limitations. Respect and obey your top and expect punishment if you don’t. Accept it gracefully and cheerfully. Your top has many things to be concerned with, including your safety and what turns you on. Be loyal and dependable and enjoy your role.


10/9/2009 10:45:06 AM
Master had a little slave
her ass was red and hot
and everything the Master craved
was what the Master got,
he hit her ass with His belt
He loved to here the sound
He counted each and every whelp
but alas he made a frown
there was a place on her cute ass
the Master saw He missed
oh my He said I cant have this
and so began to use the belt again"

"hmm if only the nursery rhymes..were written by a Dom

9/29/2009 7:46:32 AM

“I am never impressed by sheer brutality in BDSM. I AM impressed when someone can evoke a DESIRE for sheer brutality in BDSM.” ~Mollena


9/28/2009 8:43:42 AM

“Spanking ‘brings people together”

SPANKING is stressful at first, but it could bring consenting couples closer together. That’s the implication of two studies of hormonal changes associated with sadomasochistic (S&M) activities including spanking, bondage and flogging.

Brad Sagarin at Northern Illinois University in DeKalb and colleagues measured levels of the stress hormone cortisol in 13 men and women at an S&M party in Arizona, before, during and after participating in activities. During S&M scenes, cortisol rose significantly in those receiving stimulation, but dropped back to normal within 40 minutes if the scene went well. There was no change in those inflicting the activity.

At an S&M event in Colorado, testosterone was measured in 45 men and women. It increased significantly in receiving women only. Donatella Marazziti of the University of Pisa, Italy, says the boost may help women cope with the aggressive nature of S&M activities, or that it could be another sign of stress. In both studies, couples who said the party went well also reported increases in relationship closeness (Archives of Sexual Behavior, DOI: 10.1007/s10508-008-9374-5).

It’s important to note that levels of both hormones dropped back down in couples who enjoyed the experience, Marazziti says. “When sexual intercourse is consensual it is not stressful - even if it is extreme sex.”

Richard Wiseman, a psychologist at the University of Hertfordshire in Hatfield, UK, adds that almost any shared activity is likely to promote interpersonal closeness. “It doesn’t have to be tying up your partner or placing clamps on their nipples, it could be something as simple as cooking a meal together or even doing the housework as a duo,” he says.

Nick Neave, a psychologist at the University of Northumbria, UK, says the results are interesting, but future studies should control for whether participants experienced orgasm, which is associated with reduced stress and an increase in hormones associated with partner-bonding and affection.


9/22/2009 8:54:06 AM
I wish that I could find the one that would engage my mind as well as my soul.  Too many of these paths lead to dead-ends.  :(



7/22/2009 6:13:30 PM
Would it be too much to expect that many of you, who need the services of a spell checker, actually use it.  My god, I read so many profiles with so many numerous mis-spellings that I wonder who it is what is writing these profiles, and do they offer something that could pass as conversation if I met them.

Please... spell check your work!!!

7/16/2009 2:12:06 PM
There was a couple here on CM that intiated a very long conversation wtih me.  It sounded like an ideal situation for both them and me.  It appealed to my visual and Dom sensibilities, and it met the needs and desires of the husband, and most importantly, his wife was a willing participant to the arrangement.

I had high hopes for the situation before it just collasped.  We could never schedule anything.  I wanted something that was agreed to that would be 1-2 weeks away, allowing for all to prepare.  The husband could only schedule something that was 4 weeks away, and then needed to reschedule for a time that was then 8 weeks away.  It was confusing.

Why would he be so desirious to schedule something and outline in detail what he wanted to see happen, and then put it so far off into the future.  It was almost as if he was more excited by the discussion and less so about the actual activity.

Maybe that is all he wanted.  I appreicate that, but it would have been  better to have stated that from the start. :(

I would like for him to reapproach the sitaution and let it unfold.  It would be fun. 

Then again, maybe it was not ment to be.

6/11/2009 12:07:15 PM
I know that it is shallow and may revel my personal biases, but DO NOT contact me if you are over 140 lbs (what I am trying to get is is for you to be HWP).  I have not, nor will I want to be with a larger woman (if you are big, you know it already).  A larger woman, for me, does absolutely nothing for me erotically. 

For those of you (and you know who you are) that enjoy the mental game of suggesting that a taller woman could possibly exceed this weight limit, I give you the argument.  Nevertheless, the statistical curve for American women is 5'2" to 5'5".  Given that distribution, your weight should be under 140.  If you are above that height, then, Ii am open to consideration of an exception.

Just try not to be like one woman on this site and suggest that at 5'4" and her stated weight of 149 lbs (WTF -- what is 149 lbs?) that you are really 149 pound.  NO ONE reports their weight in 1 pound increments.  We all work with 5 pound numbers... for example, 145 or 150 or in her case, possibly 165-170.  Whatever.

6/9/2009 12:32:31 PM
So much time has pasted having realized that I had not posted anything in close to a year. 

I would have thought that my attention to this journal would have been more revealing to both me and to any possible reader.

I am such a fan of a few of your journals.  Some are to erotic that I reread them over and over.

Anyway, this is an attempt to say that I am alive and well.

8/15/2008 6:38:06 AM
Yesterday was a challenge for my sub.  I had her meet a local dom for some training.  He was rough around the edges but was effective in eliciting the mental and physical responses that I was seeking.  After spending the time in training, we spoke for hours about her feelings and how she viewed the experience. 

The night was complete with a spanking of her ass until it was a beautiful pink.

Looking for others (females are preferred) to assist in my sub's training.

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MsSassyEve
 
 Age: 26
 London, United Kingdom