Help! I have inadvertently turned myself into a cat! Let this be a warning to others to follow the instructions carefully when attempting spells and witchcraft!
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"highly intelligent" & "gorgeous" according to SeeksFemSlave, "beautiful" according to GreedyTop. "quite unique and extraordinary" according to Simon Cowell (allegedly), and "out of ten? I'd give her one" (anonymous).

These are just some of the many comments that have been applied to me - the one, the only Lady Ellen - and they remain as true today as ever they were.

Voted in high school "most likely to become an arrogant self satisfied sadistic bitch", the accuracy of this prediction has long since been proven, however unlikely it was at the time for an 18 year old boy.

But hey - I'm nice and loveable really, at least according to some.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT; I WAS NOT BORN FEMALE. I AM A DIAGNOSED TRANSSEXUAL IN TRANSITION AND RECEIVING MEDICAL TREATMENT TO ENABLE THAT TRANSITION FOR THE LAST SIX YEARS. THAT SAID, IF YOU PASSED ME IN THE STREET YOU WOULD HAVE LITTLE TO NO IDEA!

IF THIS IS AN ISSUE FOR YOU, THEN PLEASE DON’T WASTE TIME FOR BOTH OF US.

IF THIS IS A PROBLEM FOR YOU, THEN THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT IT IS; YOUR PROBLEM.

IN CASE YOU WONDERED, I REGISTER AS FEMALE BECAUSE IT’S THE BEST OPTION FOR ME HERE.