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katstjames
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| I am a gentleman and a beast. I am comfort and cruelty. I respect and cherish what is freely offered. I refuse to let a door mat serve. I don't want a bubbly ditz. If you can't stop in the middle of the fun stuff with a random original thought about how pompous Chaucer is, I don't know if this will work out. I am a long haul trucker. However, that doesn't mean I am some uneducated dip spitting bottom feeder. While i am forced to eat at truck stops I would much prefer a home cooked meal involving a 3 inch thick ribeye with brussel sprout and bacon salad rounded out with duck fat fries. Or just hanging out on the couch cuddling up with a glass of decent wine watching a documentary. I am also a fairly large nerd on several levels. I watch anime, a lot of movies, video games, music. I have a lot of interests. I am passionate about these things. I don't need someone with carbon copy interests but I do appreciate passion. I have been involved in the lifestyle in one way or another for almost 20 years. I have never really dived into the local scene because I have always travelled. I have a gypsy soul. Alright, I am rambling. A few keywords and then I will sit back and just wait for the interest to roll in, or whatever they do. Master/Daddy/Caring/Shibari/Protocol. I look forward to hearing from you.
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I came back to this site with a desire to find someone. I have a pretty involved career and it doesn’t leave me time to make it to munches or local scene related things. So I thought hey, I will check the internet. Between the ghosting and the scams I have talked to some pretty cool folks. However, I am not accomplishing my goal. I am kind of over this place. I have given glimpses into my thoughts and practices. Given a very good general idea of who I am and that investment has shown no return. This is not directed at the friendly conversation folks I talk to btw. You guys are awesome.
This post will get lost in the long pages of fantasy and offers of prostitution that proliferate here like maggots on a corpse. I hope everyone finds what they need. Even the prostitute Dommes. I did not. So I shall bid you adieu.
K |
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It has been quite a while since I have posted. Deep thoughts take time to finish. Today we are going to talk a little bit about dehumanizing. What is dehumanizing?
Dehumanizing is the act of taking away the human qualities of an individual. This can be a powerful thing when done correctly. It can help a sub or slave get a much deeper look at their submission. It can open neural pathways never before explored. It can deepen the bond between sub/slave and Dominant/Master. Again, when done properly in a healthy and caring way. This may seem like an oxymoron. It isn’t.
In this lifestyle we participate in, any activity we take part in should be done in a healthy and caring way. It should, hopefully, serve a purpose beyond sexual release. It should help all involved parties grow and become stronger healthier individuals. What we do is so far beyond just sex. It should be recognized as such. If in fact for you it is always just sex, you are most likely a predatory sadist. You are probably more of a problem than a healthy member of our community. You should go.
Sex is amazing and wonderful and fun. I am not saying it isn’t. I just don’t really believe in surface kink relationships. I don’t think they can work. A lot of things we do can involve large amounts of catharsis. Catharsis which is shared at the most vulnerable you can be while not suffering from a terminal illness or imminent death. No matter how casual you keep it at some point something will trigger. You will cry and you will share and in that sharing your surface kink has gone 20,000 leagues under your emotional sea and your brain has started pumping hormones. Why? It isn’t because you cried. It is the context, you are naked, may or may not be tied down, your skin is tingling, parts of you are on fire and you are on your knees. There is a person above you and this person NEEDS TO KNOW why you have broken down. They need to know they are now sort of peripheral to what is happening. You have to reason with them. Thus a bond is created. This blubbering snotty, not pretty cry. This is what submission looks like. It isn’t airbrushed and in your favorite gallery or magazine. It isn’t treated with make up and baby wipes in between scenes.
It is raw and unfiltered.
I digress. Dehumanization can be wonderful. It is sensory deprivation for the emotions. It can be cleansing, yet, I see it being abused. I see usernames and profiles and journal posts. I understand the need for gender neutral writing in our current sociopolitical climate. However, using dehumanizing language makes you look at best cold and indifferent. At worst, it makes you look predatory and insane. Do you open with these lines when you meet someone in public? Do you force third person speech on a first date? Do you describe them in this language to your mother? No? Then try to be healthy and care focused. Everything has a proper time and place. Who knows, maybe if you follow this advice you might just get some quality responses. Human first, then . If you treat them like an from the jump, why not just buy a doll? |
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Rough couple of days. Lots of changes. Almost too many. |
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I have been seeing some things here lately that sort of get under my skin. A lot of you may accuse me of kink shaming or whatever. The thing is that is not what I am doing.
When you are involved in a kink that the mainstream of your culture finds slightly repugnant, why go out of your way to rub their noses in it? Hardcore ABDL players I am looking at you. This is also referencing every single veiled “I fuck dogs” post. As far as adult babies go, I get it. It is extreme age play. Bully for you that you found someone to participate. Yes your journal is yours to post in. Post away. Just be circumspect. Have some politeness.
You aren’t standing on a busy street in the real world screaming out about how you are wearing a shitty diaper and enjoy being molested by a trusted familial figure. You aren’t babbling to ladies in line at the grocer about how you drink laxative laced formula and rubber pants. Also, if you are doing the above things, stop it. Right now. There is a difference between sex positivity/educated activism and mind bleach required brain rape.
If you cannot talk about your kink like a rational adult in an appropriate situation, keep it to yourself. Kink in general has a bad enough reputation without you tactless assholes babbling at people who don’t care as evidenced by you spouting at them somewhere other than a munch/conference/your home/your super niche tinychat room full of other people like you. If they are not in these places they are civilians. If they don’t ask outright, they aren’t interested. Social cues and propriety, learn them.
This is not a knock on the daddy/daughter dynamic or any kind of permutation thereof. Hell I am not even knocking abdl. This is a knock against people involved forcing those not involved to be involved through their word vomit. Also, if you fuck, have fucked or are planning on fucking any animal other than another consenting adult, go set yourself on fire. It is just better for us and the animal kingdom that way.
As always, messages are loved. Even if you disagree, I will discuss, debate or educate you. My opinion is my opinion. You don’t like it and think I am a piece of shit? Bring it. I am man enough to have the courage of my convictions. |
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Interests on a profile. I actually read them. I have noticed a trend. People LOVE getting massages. That is trend wise a very large population size. A lot of those users never clicked the other massage category. For D types, sure I can see it. For the massage therapists in the room? You get a pass. However, to the s types among us, to me, in my opinion this seems like an introduction to how you top from the bottom or as I like to call it bitch bark.
Small statements of desires like this are a small red flag to me. I am in no way saying you are not allowed to have wants and desires, at all. What I am saying is that in a very real way a massage is a form of body worship. Now typically this goes from s type to D type. If the D type has enjoying the body they find attractive as a paraphilia this could in fact work. For me, not so much. I get off on your worship and devotion. I am not saying I do not enjoy giving massages, in fact I do but not in a kink setting. I do however love getting them, in any setting. Why do I see this as bitch barking? Or topping from the bottom? No reciprocation. Massages should be reciprocated outside of scenes set up for the worship of the D type.
A massage is like oral sex in that way. Sure at first you can get away with not returning the favor and enjoy all the dirty sloppy head you want. Over time though the person offering up all that mouth love will feel taken for granted. They will become sullen and eventually the blowjob train reaches the station and the wheels rust up. That line is done moving.
Demanding most things and not giving back anything is unhealthy at best and relationship breaking at worst. Every single thing in life is about balance. Now our kinky super cool lifestyle has an inherently built in biased weigh scale, but we are most of us human beings. A human being needs balance. That balance can take many multitudinous forms. An s type that thrives off giving all to their D type without expectations at all is a unicorn and you should cherish that beautiful beast. Most expect aftercare, non kink relationship balance, you to at least listen to their problems and acknowledge you listened, an occasional gift, at the bare minimum a pat on the head or other appropriate place and praise. These things are not hard to do.
If you do even one of these things with any of the bitter lifers in this beautiful kinky world of ours s types will bulldoze mountains to get to you. In the lifestyle word of mouth advertising is king. Be a cold distant non carer. This is your right and your choice, however your available dating pool will drain away until you have nothing but self love. Your ropes will gather dust, your whips will crack. It will be bleak city.
If on the other hand you give minimal praise and aftercare and a general air of giving half a thought of an s type as a human being you will be swamped with people. A healthy balance is important to having a healthy sex life. Respect is also super important. Remember once you have beaten someone and tended their wounds and helped them back to earth, the scene has ended. They are now a human being again. They can still be subservient etc; but they are still human and have human foibles and desires. (Apologies to all primals, otherkin, Apache attack helicopters, etc; et al; I am speaking in generalities) So let’s start being healthy. Take but try to give some too. You will be amazed how far that can get you. |
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Down for the day. Super bored in Nebraska. Want to talk? Send me a message. Today and today only I am offering offsite communication. Message for details. |
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Sometimes while browsing the site I like to sit back and chuckle to myself. I see posts from “lesbian female submissives” and I see that they are now owned by xyz “lesbian Dominant/switch/sub female”. Then I look at both profiles. Usually I see photos that a quick google search shows are fake. I add that to bad grammar and or the horror movie script of brutal wants, coming to the conclusion that both profiles are more than likely fake. This makes me chuckle because I can’t help but think about two hetero males of whatever age both doing separate victory dances about how they duped the other into thinking they are a lady. Or the sadder but still hilarious two fake accounts owned by the same person angle. Very rarely do these situations seem remotely like real people.
However, it does beg the question am I too picky? Too abrasive? Too nice? Why is it my search remains fruitless yet the dregs seem to hook up at will?
I suppose the world will never know. |
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Today I want to talk about presentation. This is more than just language, how you dress, tonal inflection.
Presentation is all about how you present yourself to the world. That sentence seems nonsensical doesn’t it? You would think that, then look around you. How many people present themselves as how they tell you they are.
Do they carry themselves as someone you should respect? Or are they small children screaming out about how everyone should respect them? Do they dress appropriately? Do they use proper language?
These preferences are just that though. Personal and individual. I however am drawn to presentation and how you carry yourself. Vanilla, kink, doesn’t matter. If you can’t be bothered to appear to have your shit together, you have presented yourself poorly. There are always exigent circumstances, however in general, I need to see at least an attempt.
If you present yourself like a slattern I will assume you have slatternly ways. If you don’t present yourself as deserving of respect, I won’t give you any. I know subs are shaking right now. Guess what though? You deserve respect! You deserve to be treated like a person. If you aren’t find a way to put your foot down about it. In a scene, sure you can be an object, a whore, a whipping boy/girl, etc;
When that scene is done though you deserve the respect of after care, inquiries as to where your head is.
If you don’t present yourself well though you will never get these things. You will get D types that could care less about you because you presented yourself that way. This includes how you speak, the types of photos you post, the way you describe yourself in your profile. A million little details in a million little ways.
D types, you should also worry about presentation. You want respect? Earn it. Want people to know you are knowledgeable? That you are authoritative? Present yourself that way. Use spell check. Have self restraint. Show respect until you know someone. Don’t make demands of someone you have exchanged six words with. Have patience. Don’t post or aggressively send pictures of your cock or cunt. Don’t use harsh language without testing the waters.
These are simple things. Common sense simple. If you want respect you have to give it and have self-respect. That simple. Present yourself well and good things happen. |
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I finally found the answer! It is almost as disturbing as I thought. The fourth hole is in fact....*drum roll* the urethra. I hope it wasn’t as anti climactic as it was for me.
I hope everyone had a great holiday season and weren’t too hungover yesterday. I was working unfortunately. I am way ahead of my load today so I am able to catch up a bit. I have been responding to messages and generally getting in touch. I enjoy hearing from everyone who enjoys what I write. I also enjoy hearing from those who don’t. So don’t be shy about responding, I will reply as long as you are not being maliciously obtuse. I will be posting another “essay” of sorts later today. |
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After what I have just seen on this site, I think I am done looking at profiles for a while. I might still write, not sure. If you want to converse with me, feel free, especially if we have been talking. However, new people are almost a no go at this point. Also, if you mention scat or anything related to it, not interested. Also all you animal lovers, go away, you are filth. That is all. Carry on. |
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So today I am going to ask a few questions. They have a point if you can see it.
Who are you? Not in a kink sense, I mean that is a part of it if it is a part of you. Who are you in the quiet places of your soul? A man? A woman? A small attack helicopter? God? Goddess? Perfect sub? Perfect top?
Who are you when you wake up in the morning? Are you different than you were yesterday? Is this a positive or negative difference? Do you like who you are today more than the you you were yesterday? Less?
You can shoot me a message if you want or use it as a writing prompt. People always talk about ways to kill off the findom/pro domme circus sideshow. This is a way. Flood the means of communication. Don’t leave them room. Want it back? Take it back.
Have a good day. Looking forward to seeing responses. |
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Merry Christmas from Oklahoma kids! I hope you have great holidays! |
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In my long post my phone auto corrected the word hokey into home. The sentence should read It seems hokey now. Not home now. |
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Today we are going to walk down my memory lane just a little. Also I am going to apologize for the appearance of a wall of text. For some reason posting from my phone doesn't allow cs to read paragraph breaks.
I got into the actual lifestyle "scene" when I was 18. I had gotten connected with what is now considered an Old Guard group. I still talk to some of them. This group was old old guard. Kink was as underground as a fight club at this point in my life. Discretion was a byword. They were as clandestine as Freemasons. All of our education and play parties were at member owned businesses after hours or at private homes. Public play parties were rare. If we did them everyone was masked.
We had some rules. I am not going to post all of them. I am focusing on one rule today.
Rule 10. Before you can be trusted to be a top, you start at the bottom.
That is correct. I started as a session submissive. Does that surprise you? It shouldn't. Some of the best tops in the world started this way. I hated this rule. It rubbed every fiber of my being the wrong way. I was defiant and obstinate. I refused to let anyone in. Finally I had been handed off to a mistress. She saw to the heart of the problem immediately. At this point I am 19. She was in her late 30's. She saw me for who and what I was. I wasn't someone who could be bullied. I didn't respond to tops because I wasn't a submissive. She got it within ten minutes of conversation. She made a deal with me. Serve her for a year. She wouldn't ask anything sexual. Pure service. As a reward she would allow me to train and study with her. Which sounds home now considering all you need to be a top is an internet connection and a random kink wiki. Throw out some buzzwords and commands and Bam sub are throwing themselves at your feet. Right? That is why you're here yeah?
That year was super tough for me emotionally and mentally. It shaped and molded me. It taught me patience and care. It taught me the importance of consistency and after care. It taught me to cherish what was offered. Slavery or submission are a gift. Not a prize or a goal. The journey is the goal. The prize is looking into those eyes and seeing trust.
What we do isnt a one and done. At least it shouldn't be. It should be a process like building a house. You can't build a nice house on questionable foundations. It won't stand up. So I know kink doesn't work the way it used to anymore, it grew too far from the ground for that, all I am asking is for allof these tops making outrageous claims of their power to look at themselves really hard and ask 'Am I here just to hate fuck someone who is tied down?' or "Am I willing to build with someoneand honor what they give me?"
As a top that is our number one responsibility to honor what we are given. That means putting up with it when they are having a rough day. It means nursing them when they are ill. That is what we are. We are the rock they shelter under from the shit storm of the world. Every inconsistency, every broken word adds faults to that rock. Once the storm leaks through the sieve we created they are gone. We as tops have a tendency to forget that this person that does everything we say is just that, a person. A living breathing flesh shell with thoughts and emotions. We need to honor and cherish that. |
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On a side note, this site keeps multi posting my entries. I apologize. |
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Subs, slaves, men and women and others. I have a question. Does bad grammar and spelling turn you on? Based on some journal entries and profiles I am thinking it has to. There has to be a correlation. Oh you can't structure a sentence? *Falls to worshipful knees* Please abuse me with your inappropriately dangling participle. Flog me with your horrendous spelling errors. Terrify me with your misuse of adjectives! I mean it is one thing to have an occasional typo in your sixth grade essay level erotica. However, when it is consistently constant you have an issue. How can someone trust that you are a wellspring of knowledge if you can't even structure a four word sentence? How can you have properly studied enough human anatomy and psychology if you keep demonstrating you failed grade 8 English? Especially when you take into consideration that collarspace is a website. On the internet. A place where WORDS are the most basic medium. They count. They are how you are perceived by the collective zeitgeist here. Is that the dominant type you want to be? The clown? The self educated overblown dandy? That is how I see spelling errors. As dominants we have a responsibility. We are the publishing authority. We are the givers of The Law. We are in charge. We have to be seen as credible. FinDoms, we will talk at a later date. This isn't for you or your circus sideshow. We can't be seen as an authority if we speak in gibberish. Subs and slaves need to know we can communicate clearly and concisely. If we continue this pattern and don't improve ourselves, how are we going to be trusted to help mold and improve others? |
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Subs, slaves, men and women and others. I have a question. Does bad grammar and spelling turn you on? Based on some journal entries and profiles I am thinking it has to. There has to be a correlation. Oh you can't structure a sentence? *Falls to worshipful knees* Please abuse me with your inappropriately dangling participle. Flog me with your horrendous spelling errors. Terrify me with your misuse of adjectives! I mean it is one thing to have an occasional typo in your sixth grade essay level erotica. However, when it is consistently constant you have an issue. How can someone trust that you are a wellspring of knowledge if you can't even structure a four word sentence? How can you have properly studied enough human anatomy and psychology if you keep demonstrating you failed grade 8 English? Especially when you take into consideration that collarspace is a website. On the internet. A place where WORDS are the most basic medium. They count. They are how you are perceived by the collective zeitgeist here. Is that the dominant type you want to be? The clown? The self educated overblown dandy? That is how I see spelling errors. As dominants we have a responsibility. We are the publishing authority. We are the givers of The Law. We are in charge. We have to be seen as credible. FinDoms, we will talk at a later date. This isn't for you or your circus sideshow. We can't be seen as an authority if we speak in gibberish. Subs and slaves need to know we can communicate clearly and concisely. If we continue this pattern and don't improve ourselves, how are we going to be trusted to help mold and improve others? |
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Subs, slaves, men and women and others. I have a question. Does bad grammar and spelling turn you on? Based on some journal entries and profiles I am thinking it has to. There has to be a correlation. Oh you can't structure a sentence? *Falls to worshipful knees* Please abuse me with your inappropriately dangling participle. Flog me with your horrendous spelling errors. Terrify me with your misuse of adjectives! I mean it is one thing to have an occasional typo in your sixth grade essay level erotica. However, when it is consistently constant you have an issue. How can someone trust that you are a wellspring of knowledge if you can't even structure a four word sentence? How can you have properly studied enough human anatomy and psychology if you keep demonstrating you failed grade 8 English? Especially when you take into consideration that collarspace is a website. On the internet. A place where WORDS are the most basic medium. They count. They are how you are perceived by the collective zeitgeist here. Is that the dominant type you want to be? The clown? The self educated overblown dandy? That is how I see spelling errors. As dominants we have a responsibility. We are the publishing authority. We are the givers of The Law. We are in charge. We have to be seen as credible. FinDoms, we will talk at a later date. This isn't for you or your circus sideshow. We can't be seen as an authority if we speak in gibberish. Subs and slaves need to know we can communicate clearly and concisely. If we continue this pattern and don't improve ourselves, how are we going to be trusted to help mold and improve others? |
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So this is more of a mini rant. I would love feed back. I want to understand this phrase. In my head that is filled with some basic understanding of anatomy, I read this phrase and my brain twitches like Michael j. Fox on a roller coaster. I have seen this phrase on several profiles so it isn't just someone being ignorant.
What is a four hole slut? Where the hell is this fourth hole? Is it the urethra? Are these people secretly pirates with a vacant socket? Is it the nose? Are they carving artificial vaginas into their flesh? Are they holding a flesh light? Where is this fourth hole? |
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So this is more of a mini rant. I would love feed back. I want to understand this phrase. In my head that is filled with some basic understanding of anatomy, I read this phrase and my brain twitches like Michael j. Fox on a roller coaster. I have seen this phrase on several profiles so it isn't just someone being ignorant.
What is a four hole slut? Where the hell is this fourth hole? Is it the urethra? Are these people secretly pirates with a vacant socket? Is it the nose? Are they carving artificial vaginas into their flesh? Are they holding a flesh light? Where is this fourth hole? |
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Today I am personally learning a lesson in patience. In my line of work you develop a fast paced go go go attitude. Even the 10 hour break I legally have to take can be an annoyance. I need to keep my wheels turning and keep moving.
However, this morning I am at a very very slow distributor. I have waited three hours just for a dock. I have no idea what the unloading wait will be. So I have to be patient. I have to let things happen in their own natural time.
That is the lesson. Learning to let things happen in their natural time. You cannot bend the universe to your will without special permits. You have to let it play things out in it's own way. The anticipation of waiting can be fun or irritating. That is your choice.
Many of you are reading and scoffing, and I get that. Let's frame it in a way people will understand.
The slave/sub kneels. They know their trust is well founded. Their master/Dom/top/leader of the pack is now their universe. They have been kneeling and waiting for a punishment for what feels like forever...
See? The example has a choice. Wait and let anticipation build or be irritated bit they know that the "universe" moves in it's own time.
So now to how I am dealing. When I am trying shibari I find it to be a very zen experience. It isn't just a rush job so I can see tits turn purple. I am creating art. Art takes, you guessed it, patience. I am spending my morning trying to find that kernel of zen. Without rope or a cute rope bunny to work on. It is tough but I am almost there. I can feel it coming. |
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So I have briefly talked about what I am looking for. Maybe it is time to get more in depth.
I am looking for someone service/domestic oriented. Sexual slavery is great, it really is but it isn't everything. I am a long haul trucker. I am on the road 95 percent of the year. I need someone able to travel with me and see to some day to day things while I am driving. You would basically be a valet with some definite perks. I would be paying for food, hotels, whatever. In return I offer training in domestic service duties.
Now for the hard part, this is still going to be a relationship. We need to be compatible. I ha EA to like you as a person to want to train you let alone conversate with you. To that end, ladies with way over my line kinks need not apply, no doormats, no one who needs to be gangbanged. Pretty clear stuff. Just be honest. Sincerity means as much as loyalty and devotion. |
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As I sit here in my truck this morning, I find myself thinking about sincerity. I know I briefly mentioned it the other day. I just feel that it can be expanded upon.
What is sincerity?
sincerity
NOUN
mass noun
The absence of pretence, deceit, or hypocrisy.
The absence of deceit. Lies. Misdirection. These are the tools of the insincere.
I have once again been burned on this site. I move forward with no pretenses, deceits or hypocrises. What I want is clearly spelled out. I don't want endless emails. I don't want long distance. I want to look over see someone and know they are mine. That is it at the core. However, this site is full of predators, male and female.
Oh shit. I broke a cardinal rule didn't I? I as a Master should never fall prey to scammers and predators, let alone have feelings. Let me cue you in to something though, my dominance does not make me inhuman. It doesn't make me better than you at it's base. I still have feelings. Just like everyone else. Does this make me some whiny cringy submissive playing top to feel better? Absolutely not. I am dominant because that is how I am wired. I am better than you because I have studied and applied those studies for decades. I still have feelings though. Today those feelings are a little hurt.
So remember in your dealings you scamming predatory catfish, you are not toying with a screen name. On the other side of that communication is a person, like you, that bleeds and feels. |
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New rule. When contacting me be prepared to verify you are who you say you are. This is not a request for nudes. This is a request for honesty.
I am sincerely looking. I would like to find someone who is sincere as well. |
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I am online at chatstep if anyone wants to talk to me in real-time.
https://chatstep.com/home/room/Kushiel |
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So I am not sure if it is the tongue in cheek pretentiousness of my profile or just fear that stops people from responding. Maybe it is the job. I am thinking it just might be that.
Imagine that. A job that is stable in the worst economy. A salary that is reasonable. I see almost a hundred journal posts a day about " I want a dominant/master/top/daddy/ohgrandhighpubaofunsafeplaywhoiwanttogotoprisonformymurder who is comfortable with himself, financially secure, etc;
My job is scary to people. I get it. Truckers have a horrible reputation. You know what else has a scary horrible reputation? If you can read and get this, send a message. This whole lifestyle we participate in. Yet we dove right into that risk pool eh?
My job has so many perks. I can bring whoever I want, with me whenever for however long.
It is like a free vacation, except with me.
My truck is as comfortable as any hotel. I make sure of that. Premium linens and pillows everywhere.
This picture has been painted. The horse is dead, I shall stop beating it.
Take a chance, send a message. You won't leave disappointed. I have been told my wit is just as sharp as my whip tips. |
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When writing your profile keep some things in mind. People can only respond to the info you post. When a pretty innocent email is sent based off of that info jumping into the "OMG! I have a boyfriend!" mode, not super impressive. This is a dating based website, if you are not clear about your current relationships in your profile, I will not magically know that you are monogamously attached to another person.
I get it, women receive pages and pages of rude weirdness here. To assume that everyone who messages you is trying to fuck you is pretty vain. Jumping on said simple two sentence message with snark and the above mentioned mode of thought is immature at best.
Lesson learned, I will now be even more cautious and assume that every profile is of someone in a committed relationship, just to be sure.
Haha. |
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So I revamp the profile and what happens? I currently have 6 pages of messages in Google translate English that vary between demands for money and offers of unal. I am not sure what unal is, but it sounds unpleasant.
Well I suppose if this is what I get for being witty, I don't want to see what happens when I add polish. |
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So to everyone who has sent feedback regarding any of my writing, thank you. I really appreciate conversing with people who don't live in some kind of kink porn weirdness bubble.
I am just writing a thank you today. Mostly because I am about to revamp the profile. Which means I need to save some wit and verve. |
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Whatever happened to being classy and working up to the depravity? It is starting to look like no one appreciates a gentleman. Now I know in the currently state of internet self deion, decrying yourself as a nice guy or a gentleman is passe. I don't go in Michigan for societal Norma. If I did I wouldn't be here would I? I am not saying I am not a savage depraved sadistic pervert, because I am. I just believe that you need to be seen as a man first, brutal dominant second. I do this by having a conversation you could have in public first. If I came up to you in a coffee shop and introduced myself by going on and on about what I was going to do to you, would you be receptive? Or is it better to start with a normal conversation peppered with wit and friendly flirting. I believe in a no pressure approach, I can flirt in a fun way without expecting a serious response. I am of a very old guard mindset I guess. I also believe the best play/relationships come from a solid base of friendship first. Keep on course and enjoy your journeys! |
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Today, today I want to talk about unrealistic expectations. To do this I am going to be moving forward on the assumption every profile here is real and accurate. I know, I know, suspend your disbelief for a second.
The first thing we are going to talk about is 24/7 prisoner style caging. Unless you live in a shack in the woods or in some kind of BDSM Utopia community this is just an untenable position. Someone is going to glance into your domicile and see this caged person and call the police. That makes this beyond even a R.A.C.K. situation. The most you can get away with is a few hours here and there.
The second thing we are going to talk about is the "beat me until I almost died" mindset. This one should be obvious but isn't. This level of violence is in no way healthy for the sub/slave/bottom/super duper pain loving maso slut or for the Top/Dominant. There have been extensive studies done about the effects of long term hard torture on both the tortured and torturer. It begins to color and shade your perspective and can lead to a psychotic break. I am not saying don't bruise or bleed or mark your bottom but I am saying that no one can exist for long under such psychologically grueling conditions.
Now I am probably going to ruffle some feathers. Are you ready to be ruffled? Abduction play should always be kept in your private space. Especially if you are going to play hard. If you want to do Chase and take down buy a plot of land, rent a remote cabin. Be sure that you are private. In today's gun happy America the last thing you need is to be shot by a passerby who ISN'T INVOLVED in what you are doing. This is the way of it.
The last thing we are going to talk about is buying a slave/submissive. This is complete bullshit. At best it is prostitution, at worst you are participating in actual HUMAN TRAFFICKING! The courts are not going to care about the slave deed/contract all parties signed. That is not a legally binding thing.
Please, please keep these things in mind as you navigate this site and our community. R.I.S.K and R.A.C.K. play are absolutely fine, I participate myself. Just use some common sense. If you don't play safe sane and consensual at least try for informed, common sensical and consensual. |
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I have come to notice that there are a high percentage of scam accounts here. I won't name names I have sent the info on to site staff. I am here looking for a genuine person. A real person. So far all I have found are accounts catfishing or asking for money. This is a huge detriment to my search. It makes me Leary of contacting anyone I feel is interesting. I am almost to the point of requiring proof of anyone that contacts me. Almost. So if you are a scammer don't waste my time. If you are a catfish don't waste my time. I want the real. The curious. Those who want to be taught. That is all. Thanks. |
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| Age: 34 |
| United Kingdom |
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