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Pan Female Dominant, 48,  48035, Michigan
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KatyDidU1 - photo 1
KatyDidU1 - photo 2
KatyDidU1 - photo 4
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KatyDidU1 - photo 7

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46 year old single, bisexual, Dominant female who has been a part of the Detroit BDSM community since I returned here for grad school in 1999. I havent been to much lately because of a family member being ill and moving. Im hoping to start going to things again soon.

For those of you who have looked at my profile before, Im now happily single. Please make sure you read my entire profile before writing to me though because I have some very specific requirements. If you do not meet those, I will not reply. Illiteracy isnt attractive.

If you are married or in a committed relationship, are younger than 36, or are older than 56, please do not bother contacting me. I will not reply. Im 46 years old and Im not looking for a daddy or to become a mommy. Thanks for your interest but cmon... Be realistic! Also, if you have a criminal record, drink more than once in a blue moon, use drugs (including marijuana), or smoke, you are definitely not what I want. And you must be employed, have your own transportation, and not live in your parents basement. Its amazing that I even have to type that.

Im looking for a long term type of relationship - not casual play. I can go to a party if all I want is to be a free one time play partner. And casual sex gets boring pretty darn quickly.

Personality and intelligence mean a lot more to me than whether or not youre super hot. I would rather find someone who can carry on a conversation about politics while he or she fixes my car and shines my shoes than someone who looks awesome in a thong. Though a great ass would certainly be a bonus. Im also very service oriented. You better have plans to pay a maid to take care of my house or do it yourself. Same with my car, my lawn, the leaves, any snow we get, and heavy gardening. If you physically cant do these things, then this wouldnt be a good match.

Im looking for someone whos equally at home at a theater (and I mean a real one, not the screen version) as they are at a play party. Who can either fix my car or take it to be fixed so I never have to think about it. Who enjoys both staying home or vacationing in a 4 star hotel. Who loves dogs (and not in a sick way) and can lug 40 pound bags of dirt to where I want them for gardening. And yes, my dog is an indoor spoiled brat who sleeps in the bed with me. I love him. I dont even know you yet.

Specific fetishes arent really important to me. Yes, I like causing pain but I dont believe in breaking my toys. Im pretty flexible on the rest. I think it would be a shame to let my floggers and paddles continue to collect dust but I can always beat someone at a party if I have the urge. It doesnt mean Id want to talk to them after. And no, Im not going to wear leather or latex or a certain outfit every time I see you. Im just as dominant in my running shoes as I am in 4 inch spike heels. Heck... I dont think I even own 4 inch heels anymore. Harley Davidson boots, yes... Thigh high anything, nope! Definitely not my style.

And I get really bored with just putting someone in bondage. If all you want to do is lay there in ropes, Id end up falling asleep. To me, bondage is fun once in a blue moon if I want to do things to someone and not let them move. The rest of the time, what use is a tied up person to me? You cant even give me a backrub.

And sex of course... Im 46 and female which means sexual prime over here. If your penis needs a blue pill to work, then youd better not have a problem using a dildo. And if you dont have a built in penis, then youd better enjoy being a hand warmer. My fingers are feeling a bit chilly. And yes, Im definitely in charge and creative in the bedroom. And Im truly bisexual. I dont care if youre male or female but I like men to look like men and women to look like women. Youd think boobs with a penis would be a bonus for me but it just ends up being a turn off.

Im a very liberal, feminist, vegetarian, tree hugging, Buddhist, democrat. Yes, I wear leather and eat Jello so Im not a rabid vegetarian but Im pretty close. If you kill Bambi while cheering that Trump is president, were not going to have a damn thing in common. Good luck with your search. And Im completely serious about that. No Trump supporters and no hunters or fishers. Im not living with deer jerky in my freezer and no one is gutting a fish anywhere that I live.

Before you ask, no, Im not sending out a picture. I look like your average 46 year old professional. Short blondish hair right now, green eyes, I wear my glasses, no tattoos, and my only piercings are in my ears. I could lose weight but the DD chest balances that well.

Im not always in the mood for dealing with this site. There are times I take my profile down because I really dont want to meet anyone from here. This normally has something to do with my regular vanilla life. If it offends you that I have a real life and friends that know nothing about my interests with this, then we would not be a good match. If it annoys you that I put all of them before some man or woman that Ive never even met, then youre an idiot. Five emails back and forth do not equal a long term relationship where you have any claim over my time. I dont owe you any explanation for why I change my mind about a particular date or say Im not interested. Dont expect one.

Im also not a swinger. I expect to meet you at least three times before I share much personal ination about myself. And no, I dont fuck on first dates. Get real.

Im very interested in moving again. I can go anywhere in Michigan and find a job easily but, with the type of work I do, I would need to check if other states require licensing in my field. With some of them, it might take me a bit longer to find employment. I dont have family left in this area and Im truly sick of Detroit. I need a change. I would obviously expect to be working wherever I am because Im not the type to sit home and do nothing. Plus, I like vacations too much and it normally takes two incomes to have a few fun ones each year. My 55 pound dog and my equally large tortoise would obviously be coming with me so moving to a different country would be pretty much impossible. Moving someplace warm with a nice big yard would be a bonus for my tortoise. She would be much happier outside.

Have a fabulous day!












 Dominant Female



 Willing to Relocate

 5' 4"






Actively Seeking:

Submissive female

Sub / Slave Male

Switch Women

Switch Male

 Lives For:

 Coffee Shops



 Disciplining your genitals

 You massaging me

 You being my domestic servant

 You doing all of the housework


 Puzzle Games

 Web Surfing

 Liberal Politics

 Political Activism


 Female Sovereignty

 Lifestyle BDSM

 Old Guard

 Country Music


 Fine Dining

 Musical Theater

 Renaissance Faires


 Violating your rear

 You worshiping my body

 You worshiping my breasts

 Collaring you

 Electrical Play

 Erotic touch


 Hair Pulling


 You at the end of my leash

 Medical fetish play

 Modern Primitivism

 Training you to be completely
obedient to me and only me

 Treating you like an object

 You worshiping me with recitations and rituals

 Spanking you


 Board Games

 Card Games

 Science Fiction





 Intellectual Discourse



 Eighties Music

 Rock Music



 Antique Shows

 Flea Markets

 Garage Sales







 You begging

 Blindfolding you

 Disciplining you with a cane


 Local BDSM Community

 You kissing and worshiping my feet

 Gas Masks


 Mental Bondage

 Going to munches

 Sensation Play

 Outdoor Bondage

 Public Play

 Role Playing

 Sensory Play


 Wax Play

 Historical Shows

 Online Chatrooms

 Romance Novels

 TV News


 Online Auctions



 Alternative Music


 Folk Music

 Heavy Metal Music

 Pop Music

 Punk Rock Music









 Plastic Wrap Bondage

 Comedy Shows


 Libertarian Politics


 Curious About:




 TV Sports

 Industrial Music



 Bar Hopping



 Orgasm Control




 Cuck Options

 Hard Limits:







 Conservative Politics

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Journal Entries:
10/17/2022 2:03:21 PM

Using a journal entry so I don't have to wait for approval to change my profile.  I'm 50 now and no longer a vegetarian.  I do not have any pets.  I'm no longer looking to move outside of Michigan.  I need to stay here due to the license for my job.  Moving within Michigan might be an option.


Things I'm truly looking for:  an intelligent, service oriented submissive who is between the ages of 40 and 55 and who is both single and available for a long term relationship.


Hard limits:  chastity, cross dressers or sissy maids, pegging, people who try to masturbate to my emails, people who have one main kink and only want that need met, people who don't read my profile, people who expect Barbie with a whip and leather catsuit.


 I want to have fun with this again!

3/6/2018 4:58:27 PM
I've said this before and I'll say it again, I'm not going to discuss your cock.  I don't care if it's a 9 inch monster or a 2 inch worm that you want kept in chastity.  I'm just plain not going to discuss it, what I like to do with CBT, or anything related to it.  Chastity is a hard limit anyway.  If you want jack off material, go read some porn that someone wrote for that purpose.  Don't talk to me about it.

2/10/2018 1:13:34 PM
You really do need to love dogs to be a part of my life.  I've tried having people over who dislike them or who are scared of them and it just doesn't work.  And I always plan to have a dog.  I can't imagine life without one or two of them.

1/9/2018 3:00:41 PM
To all of you who plan on lying or who are obviously illiterate:  READ MY PROFILE COMPLETELY BEFORE YOU BOTHER TO WRITE TO ME.  Don't waste my time or yours.  If you voted for Trump, smoke, do drugs, or hunt/fish, I'm not going to go near you.  If you can't call me when you say you're going to, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.  I didn't do anything to you.  I don't even know 99.99% of you.  No wonder women will only speak to someone who will send them a $100 gift card first.  YOU ARE THE REASON FOR THAT.  When you act like a complete moron, expect to be treated like one.  And not in a fun humiliation kind of way.  I'll just call you stupid and hit the block button.  QUIT WASTING MY TIME.  And yes, I'm pissed off at the amount of idiocy that manages to find its way here.  I truly didn't know this many imbeciles existed on the planet.  I don't lie to you.  I'm lifestyle and not a professional.  I'm that "real" woman you claim to want.  SO LEARN TO READ A PROFILE BEFORE YOU BOTHER TO CONTACT ME.

1/6/2018 5:19:50 PM
Why do people lie on here?  And I'm not even talking about the vast amount of lying married men who get upset when you won't let them jerk off to what you type.  I'm talking about run of the mill lies like what time they'll text you or that they want to do what you say.  Someone on here prove me wrong.  Out of all you guys claiming you want to be submissive, why can't I find one who will do something so simple as shovel my snow?  That's basic common courtesy.  And why do you all act like I'm the one who's a freak because I insist on 3 dates before I tell you where I live?  Haven't you ever heard of a little thing called safety?  It doesn't take much time to meet for coffee, see a movie, go out for dinner, or attend a munch.  You could get all three dates done in a week if you wanted to so I know I'm not asking for the impossible.  If you want to be in charge, go find a different site.  If you want me to be in charge, then lower your damn testosterone level a notch and actually pay attention to what I say.  I'm not a fetish dispenser.  I'm not here to meet your needs.  Go pay one of the wonderful professionals that are abundant if that's what you're looking for.  If you want to meet the needs of a lifestyle Mistress, then close your mouth and open your ears.  I don't want to screw things up with your job, your family, or with what your neighbors think.  But yes, I expect to be in charge.  And I'm not going to arm wrestle you for that role.

12/11/2017 12:06:42 PM
If you have any urge to discuss your cock with me before I ask questions about it, then go talk to someone else.  I really couldn't give a fuck less about your damn cock.  And quit thinking it's ok to masturbate to conversations with me.  It isn't.  I don't exist to make your penis happy.  And I don't care if it's a 3 inch one that you want to be kept in chastity forever or a 9 inch monster.  I refuse to discuss it.

11/29/2017 1:13:26 PM
This is my "no thank you" letter that I wrote to someone today who I had been talking with for a while.  Maybe this will give you some insight into what I'm looking for in a person.

Ok...  I give up again.  You obviously don't want to talk to me and you prefer to take one line out of a paragraph and concentrate on that instead of the rest of it.  This isn't fun anymore.  I really liked talking to you yesterday.  I liked your voice even if you kept saying you had a cold.  You sounded intelligent but not super geeky.  Except for the plaid and the baseball cap, I liked your picture.  I was looking forward to seeing the haircut and how you looked in a different type of outfit.  I wanted to actually get to know more about you instead of just your one experience with this but you kept dragging the conversation back to that.  I should have noticed that you don't ask me any questions.  You don't see me as a real person who you'd want to get to know.  Or the only questions you ask me actually have to do with you, like how often I crave using a strap on after I've said repeatedly that I rarely use one.

This obviously didn't click.  Different expectations.  I want to be treated like a real person instead of just a means to fulfill your needs.  I want someone who actually respects and likes me.  I want to be able to believe, respect, and like them back.  I want someone who enjoys talking to me and being around me as much as I would enjoy being with them.  Not someone who avoids it like the plague.  I want someone who actually looks at my needs as being important and not just something inconvenient they have to do in order to get their main kink met.  Heck...  I want someone who doesn't have a main kink.  I want the flexibility to have fun with this again instead of doing the same thing over and over again.

You're not that person.  You're a guy who had one experience that he brings up repeatedly and obviously wants to repeat.  That's why I suggested seeing a professional.  They aren't going to want to have any other type of relationship with you and you can get that one need met if you negotiate it prior to the session.  I can recommend some good ones who you'd probably like.  I'll even check if they're willing to use strap ons first if you want.

I'm not mad about this but I am disappointed.  I thought you could be more.  I obviously wrote that out yesterday.  Then you turned around and lied to me today.  I make it clear that I'm not into drama and you're a major drama king.  If you can't tell me the truth before we've ever even met, you're not going to suddenly change and become honest later.  I know enough about dating to know that a person's basic personality doesn't ever change.  You make up excuses and lie.  And then you try to blame me for your lies.  I would have to be insane to want to keep talking to you after you already did that to me a few times now.

Good luck.  Let me know if you want help finding a good pro.

11/19/2017 8:40:12 PM
Disappointed again.  What the hell is up with guys insisting on lying?  If you say you're going to do something, like give me your phone number, just do it.  If we've gotten to the point where I'm asking for your number, you should be happy about it.  I'm not going to stalk you or call at 4am or anything.  Stupid ass freaks...

11/16/2017 2:59:44 AM
Another great day to get things done. And today it isn't supposed to rain at all for once. Haven't quite made it out of bed yet though. The dogs are still cheerfully snoring and my boy dog has his head on my tummy so I don't want to move and wake him up. It's just too darn cute.

11/15/2017 3:19:44 AM
I love waking up early and having time to wrestle with the dogs before getting out of bed.  Now I'm happily covered with dog drool, plus there's the added bonus of finding out Australia voted to allow LGBTQQAiS2 marriage!  Today is an excellent day.

11/13/2017 4:15:55 PM
I'm truly sick of people who can't be bothered to read my profile.  I make it VERY clear that I'm not interested in people who voted for Trump.  If you were stupid enough to do so, then I really don't want to talk to you.

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