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I am going through a divorce, and making a lot of changes in my life. I suppose you could say I am like a moth in the chrysalis stage...about ready to be re-born as a butterfly that is free!
I am looking forward to having new experiences and seeing what the world will hold for me!
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could we please just fast forward to next week?
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Missing my bf who is away on vacation...again...lucky man! I have been working in the garden trying to keep calm and carry on...but this has been a trying week. Some clear sailing would be a welcome change! |
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I spent the weekend gardening. It is wonderful how time spent alone digging in the dirt is so therapeutic and the end results are beautiful!
I am not in distress any longer but I feel something in me has changed. I will never trust the same way again. I will simply find a bit of happiness where and when I can. |
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shopping was delightful...there is nothing like a brand name at a bargain price yummy! I find myself looking forward to tomorrow and spending some time downtown with my dearest friend. |
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I am not trying to be mean, I have no wish to hurt anyone's feelings, and I always try to be polite, however, when you come at me with a puffed up "I am a God...Your God" attitude and this is our first conversation I am not going to bow down and cower. I have to take care of my own safety.
I begin to wonder about how effective this site really is. |
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Errands accomplished! very wet walk this morning ugh!!! but now on to the shower and the hunt for a bargain that of course looks amazing at the same time. I do love the "hunt" |
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change of plans! a couple errands this morning and oh bliss....a shopping trip!!! |
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Oh what a rainy start to the day! I have some work to plow into this morning...I have to be productive today so I can get out and go do something tomorrow! |
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Was very productive this morning but my mind has now wandered where it shouldn't. I am trying to decide if I should ask someone I know to help me deal with my situation for a while. I do not want to overstep the friendship by asking but if he is as confident and together as I believe he is would he not at least take it as a compliment that I would want his help? Or would it make our friendship strained and weird... Ahhh decisions decisions! |
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It is a new day...and i have a bit of work to do. I met an interesting man on line yesterday. First he insulted me because I did not immediately send my picture, I chided him about his demands and he instructed me that I was not really a sub. I found myself laughing and enjoying the banter. I am certainly no wet blanket. I am not a slave. (not saying there is anything wrong with being a slave, it is just not me). I am a strong willed woman who for the right man enjoys submission, not some mindless idiot to follow blindly because you say so...you have to actually be my Mentor Dom before I could submit to your will. Good heavens it was entertaining though! |
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Well, I've had a lovely sulk. Sometimes, i think it is a good way to process feelings, to deal with emotions. Its ironic how several things can go wrong in your life all at the same time. It gets to be a bit like dominoes...maybe that's why I do not care for that game ;).
I feel empty but cleaner somehow, as if facing and purging emotions has somehow made it easier to move forward. I've lost a friend this week and I know it is going to be raw for a while but it is time for me to let it go.
I've re-arranged my work area and cleaned it from top to bottom. I have realized that while I want a secret intimate friendship, and I long for that Mentor to be able to ask guidance of, I realize I will survive without these things. I will talk and enjoy new friends until someone comes along that really "gets" me. |
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Nothing new or interesting here...,finally feeling better...guess I will just have to downtown and see if I can meet someone interesting! |
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I think I will just take it easy today. Still not feeling 100% and better to be well than running around making everyone else suffer. I imagine I can keep myself busy and entertained. |
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gave in and traded my lunch date for a hot pot of tea and a warm duvet....not the adventurous day I had planned...but isn't that just the way life is? :) |
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Feeling a little under the weather today. Have a lunch date but the thought of spending the day in bed reading or watching the idiot box definitely has some appeal... |
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wasted day...not enough focus *sigh* obviously my thoughts are finding some special Man to share with...and since that hasn't happened I have got to draw on some self discipline....ugh! |
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Another week begins! This weekend went much to fast. I found myself dwelling on my old friend perhaps more than is good for me, but I suppose we all like to wallow in happy moments once in a while...even if they are in the past. I have a busy day ahead as long as I can keep myself focused. I suppose it is time to get moving... |
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My adventure turned into a wonderful day! I had a couple dates with friends but then I ran into a very special old friend and the surprise just made my whole morning. I hung out with some younger friends this afternoon and played a little beauty parlor...I do so love giving a makeover!...all in all a lovely day. Of course now I have some chores to catch up on so...I guess I better get to it! |
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No rain! Yeah!!! Im going to fix myself up and go enjoy coffee with a friend or two...and see where the day goes from there! I love a day like this...a morning anchor of coffee with friends and then the rest of the day a blank slate and nothing to do but find and adventure to fill it! |
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I have a special day planned tomorrow...I hope a day wandering downtown will be entertaining! |
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I suppose I need to make some changes to my profile. I am not looking for a quick hookup in your parked car...I am looking for someone to help me learn and grow. I love being challenged and encouraged...I am a very sensual kinky woman, with the right partner there are few things I am not open to but if you cannot engage my mind we will never get that far! |
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I just made this account today and after reading through all the mail I got I am a little overwhelmed. I will spend some time going back through it and responding to the messages that caught my attention...so far it seems like a really friendly site. Thanks to everyone for the warm welcome...
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