See, this is why people have no faith in this site.

Devi40F in San Fran wrote me the (exact, like in cut and paste) same message three times urging me to add her on Skype.  One sentence.  Um... no, thanks?

I read her profile, she and I wanted almost nothing of the same.  Her profile reads like an advertisement for services, which it undoubtedly is.  After the second time I wrote her back expressing my apprehension, but asking if she was writing me because she actually wanted to discuss something other than what she expressed in her profile.  When I sent the message, she read it within the same minute.  Also when I sent it, I found I had a third such message, sent a minute before my own was sent.  I tried to write a second time to thank her for her time and decline to talk, clearly poser but I didn't say that.  It was just, you know, 'thanks but we want different things, good luck' and all that.  I hit send less than one minute later, she'd already blocked me.  She didn't nearly have time to read the first letter I sent, so really it was decided in the space of the first paragraph, if it even took that long, that I wasn't going to play her stupid games and she blocked me.

I'm nice to everyone here.  I'm beyond nice in fact.  I try not to assume anything, I'm patient, because hey, I may find what I'm looking for in the most unlikely of places.  So yeah, I'm nice to everyone, always.

Until now.

What a stupid bitch.  Assuming its even a woman.

Meh.  Outburst over.

But see, this is exactly why this site has such a bad reputation.  Predators and morons like this.  If anyone really wants to talk to me, please do.  I'll be nice.  Behave like this?  Don't waste my time.  Please.

I'm beginning to feel like honesty is a vice around here.  Sounds funny but there are people here looking for something that may agree its true.

The players, those looking to wank or for some 'lively' chatter, they'll say anything to get it.  After all, its not likely they'll be caught in a lie, and if they are they'll move on to the next profile and never miss a beat.  So they can be as "perfect" as possible if it will get them the attention they're after.  Those of us who are actually trying to find someone, we have to be honest because if we're not we can't actually meet them.  And if we do we'll be labeled a liar for having misled them.  Not that I want to mislead anyone anyway.  Just sayin'.

I often find someone that says they want to talk to me, but they make no effort.  They're on every day but likely writing others who told them what they wanted to hear.  I guess its easy to be taken in when you're honest and looking for someone because someone is lying to you offering your fondest dream instead of the reality of a not-perfect person.

The frustrating part is I, and others I know, who are looking are overlooked in this mix, in this process.  From my own perspective, I have no problem finding dates.  I just can't find what I'm seeking here in the vanilla world.  The person I want wouldn't advertise it there.  In fact, like myself, you'd never suspect she is that person because she's not wrapped up in the pomp and pretense of the lifestyle.  She isn't walking around with a riding crop and her tits hanging out. :)  She's just a person who wants a significant other who's probably having about as much success as I am.  Then she may come here, get overwhelmed with the attention of pretty lies, then become jaded by wave after wave of bull.

So, for the sake of honesty, openness and being direct: this is me.  Just a guy, looking for just a gal, so we can have what we want and need and not have to deal with erogenous escapades of users and losers.

Anyone who truly wants what they're asking for, I hope you'll take the time.

Well, I've been back on this site a while and it really hasn't changed.  If it has, it's gotten a bit worse.

Most of the people here (not all) are out for money, for someone to abuse, to have sex with as a sole ive, or all of the above.

I have met some serious people, though they were spoken for and not looking.  That or we had a difference of opinion about something that amounted to a hard limit, but most often not a hard limit relating to this way of life.  Just something.  Whatever.  They're good folk and I'm glad to still be in touch with most of them as friends.

Of those that don't fit into the above, I'm finding that most of them lack commitment.  Either they're talking to twenty people and paying real attention to none of them, or they're talking to one person who's promised them the world but won't deliver and by the time these folk get past that they're so jaded they won't believe in anyone again.

The problem here seems to be responsibility and people just wanting something other than what they're asking for.  Those that want money don't seem to get that being dominant means taking responsibility for yourself and then for anyone you claim to 'own'.  Not using them to pay your bills.  That's dependency, and subsequently it's submission.  Of course if that person stops paying their bills they'll move on to the next sucker.  Not very dominant at all.  Those looking for sex or someone to abuse to sate their sadism aren't really looking for a relationship, though most of them are self-convinced they are.

There's even been a small percentage that seem to have serious issues with commitment and look for ways out of something good when fear it might work out kicks in.  They usually just disappear, stopping their responses without any explanation.

Now, with all that said, I'm not giving up.  There must be one good woman out there that wants to own a man (and I mean 'own').  Someone reasonable and responsible, that knows that being submissive doesn't necessarily mean I want to be abused, belittled, mistreated or taken advantage of.  Someone that just wants someone to take care of their practical needs, and care that they're happy.  I just ask you care back.  A few simple rules of respect for who we are.

Anyone who'd like to talk about it is welcome to write.  If you have a different opinion I'll hear it but I'd rather avoid an argument where our beliefs differ.  Discussion is fine.

Ultimately, I'm still seeking that special woman to give myself over to in totality.  Let the short sighted people continue their pointless 'search' for something they won't find because its right in front of them.  Someone with vision and has determination and commitment would come to appreciate me for who I am.

Maybe I'll hear from her soon.