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Okay, let me see if I can help describe myself. I am 50 years old. I lived with a man in a D/S relationship for 4 years. After we relegated, I had gotten married to a very vanilla man( long story). I stayed married to this man for 18 years out of loyalty. We have been separated for almost 2 years. Right now I wouldn't even look at someone not in the lifestyle. I'm not looking for play partners or just a good time. This is more then a lifestyle to me. Its who I am. I need the control and protocol. I need the discipline, although I'm not a masochist. At one time my pain level was very high. Now it needs to be rebuilt. I can be a smartass and sometimes have an attitude as some of you already know. Just because I am looking for a relationship does not mean I'm looking for a roommate. I have adult children and grandchildren that I devote time to and I work full-time. I don't need someone to pay my bills or buy me things. I can do that. I do need a friend and Master. Thank you for listening to my rant.
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