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| I'm getting into my almost 20th year in this life, and what I have learned in that time is quite a lot, as it would cause quite a headache if you were thrown all of it at you at once....so here goes...Being a Dominant is not always about flogging or rough sex. Its not about verbal abuse or stomping on the submissive's self esteem. It's based on trust first and foremost. If you dont have that first you will never have her.you must have love and respect for her as a person. If your intent is to cane her then force her to her knees as she is in a crying heap at your feet in the first 2 hours of meeting her, well, you get what you deserve...After learning much about this life and reading many books and talking to many experts, I've actually thought about being a mentor and talking to other Newbies in the Life about what is real and what is all Hollywood(BTW...secretary is an awesome movie!) Im looking for friends that would like to chat about their experiences(or lack of)and hopefully I find some truly kick ass friends!(we can all use more of those, right?) On another note: To all the Doms that dont know what "aftercare" is....shame on you.... thats the best part of finding out how well of a Dominant you are...
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