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The only reason there is a profile here is because people actually asked to have something to read about me. I am obliging those requests and hope that others will take a cue and read this as well.
I am a pretty simple lady. I am intelligent and passionate, but my life is not really that interesting. I have traveled and I have seen some things that have impacted me for the rest of my life. I plan to continue such ventures when life is more accommodating. I have a lot of very demanding responsibilities, so I do not work. My time is oddly more limited than it is for those who do work, so please don’t waste it if I offer you some of it and please don’t be offended when I have to put off plans for more time than I really would like. I love natural places, but being able to enjoy them as I would like is often difficult. I write, play music, sing, and think. I enjoy intimacy with a few and I need my quiet time. I am reflective and often overanalyze the words and deeds of myself and others. I’d rather err on the side of caution when it comes to making sure I am the person I need to be and that my relationships are healthy.
I believe that any relationship that is going to succeed needs plenty of time and attention. Regular and significant communication is not optional. Only a basic level of trust can ever be given. The rest is earned. I don’t believe relationships are about getting one’s own needs met, but meeting the needs of the other and the relationship as a whole. If both do this, both will be well taken care of.
I am here because I have need of a relationship that does this differently than what has become normal. I need the strong leadership of a good and decent man. Equitability works for many, but it cannot be the only way for me. To me, there is only equal and not equal, therefore the only concept I can support is a paradigm where totality is the goal. This doesn’t happen overnight for healthy, sane people, but it is the path I would hope to pursue. That path includes such terms as Master, slave, TPE/APE, no limits, and ownership. I know these are theoretical terms only. In this real world of ours, total and absolute don’t exist except as concepts. Slavery is illegal as is ownership of a human being. There will always be limitations and places in each person’s psyche where angels dare not tread. These are the ideals, however, of the relationship I seek.
The list of what I am not into is far shorter than listing everything I am into, so suffice it to say that most toys, techniques, roleplays, etc. I either already love or am willing to try at least once. Just ask me what I think of something before springing it on me. I will usually at least be intrigued, perhaps nervous or even afraid, but not opposed. If I put up the wall, feel free to explore why and maybe that wall can come down one day. Maybe you will find that demon is best left alone. If you are wondering what the basic no no’s are then here it is:
- Nothing illegal or that puts my vanilla world in harm’s way.
- Death and permanent disablement are hard limits. Sorry. This will NEVER change.
- Mentally damaging me.
- I do not violate other people’s relationships nor do I allow them to violate mine. I will not be part of destroying a relationship nor will I allow anyone to destroy mine or try to isolate me.
- Games, drama, endless online fantasy. I am real and I actually do this stuff in the real world.
- High-risk activities done without show of proficiency or a clean bill of health. (Yes, I am willing to do the same)
Also note that I have a switch component, but I cannot mix them within my primary relationship(s). I am a weak switch and it is difficult to trigger it. I have no desire to overthrow or play power games. One of us will be in control and the other will not. Aside from casual situations, this is ALWAYS the case.
I am not necessarily poly, but a lot of the decorum applies. I am married and he does have a say in whom we bring into our lives and what is acceptable. He is agreeable to things he finds personally detestable because he knows I desire it. His limits are few, but they WILL be respected. Be prepared to meet and greet him, assure him that you are a safe partner for me, and to ask for his input. If you can’t handle that, then you need not apply.
If you think you fit the bill, if what I said resonates with you, please send me a note. I will look forward to hearing from some wonderful people soon.
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