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Dominant,
Unique, Perceptive, Conversant, Experienced.
Open Minded, Intelligent, Dedicated, Skilled, Versatile.
Sadistic, Possessive, Controlling, Demanding.
Friendly, Relaxed, Curious, Helpful, Wise.
Inquire Within.
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So, one of the questions I get now and again is 'How do I find a guy like you?'
Wow, that came across as terribly Self-Important, didn't it?
Anyway.
I'm never sure how to answer that, both because the explanation itself requires a lot of time and because each of Dom is different.
But I've stumbled across a thread, a list of 'guidelines' for new-ish submissives to find a good Dom.
Like the thread says, it's not a rulebook, just guides. But it's a VERY good guide.
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3559152/tm.htm
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Some time ago, my girl came to visit me over a weekend. Before this date, we'd been strictly long distance. So of course it was a milestone. Especially in her case. You see, she's new to the lifestyle. Just over half a year of experience, most of it mainly philosophical and idealogical. Of course, I'd explored with her what I could with a vast landmass separating us, but eventually we came to the point where for her to learn or grow more she simply had to have some real life experience.
One on one kinky fun is what some would call it. Others would call it a 'scene'. Still others 'play time'. And for the most severe of us 'fulfilling her duty/nature'. But none of these words appeal to me. None of them can accurately describe how incredibly well she adjusted to the situation. Talking about kinky, fetishistic things over the phone and online is one thing. Actually submitting yourself to someone else, giving them an imbalanced amount of power over you is an entirely different ball game. Because she has some self confidence issues betimes, we set up a series of signals to help keep things within comfortable levels for her. So that the transition from phone to RL was smooth.
They almost weren't needed at all. My pretty little pet adapted, adjusted, and sank herself into her role as submissive with much of the ease and grace of a significantly more experienced submissive.
Yes, she had questions, yes, there were moments of doubt or curiosity. But this was to be expected. For it was supposed to be a learning experience for her. And, of course, a time of enjoyment for me. Nothing quite like guiding a new girl into the fold, and then watching her grow.
I expected some tender moments. I am not the sort of Dominant who must be strong and fierce at all points in time. Whose own insecurities demand that he maintain the charade of strength and stability. Of command and power. Humanity is a case of contradictions. Even a Dominant must accept and be aware of that. At least in my eyes.
What I didn't expect was for her every smile to warm me in places where my spirit has been cold for some years, now.
As wonderfully as she performed and succeeded in gaining much of the experience she needed. As fun as it was to slide between her thighs, As admirably as she handled having her ass reddened and abused.. when I think back on the weekend I do not immediately remember the intimate or passionate details. But instead the mere feeling of peace. As if finally I had found something Right in my life.
Has that ever happend to you? Where you realize that you've stumbled upon the /correct/ path. The one which will lead you to satisfaction and joy? If you have not, I pity you.
Before her I liked the idea of having multiple girls to fuck. Two or three pretty little horny, masochistic pets at my beck and call.
But she's enough for me. More than enough. She surpasses every expectation. My girl is kind, but spirited, she is demure and yet rosette. She is intelligent but not haughty. She is humble but not weak.
And she's kinkier than she thought she was -Cackles.-
Alright, well, as good as it feels to wax poetic about the romantic side of things. This is, of course, a relationship with a duality to it more severe than is standard. So prudence (and fond rememberence) dictate that I speak upon the other half.
As a Dominant, as a Master, whom has been studying this lifestyle for nigh-on-a-decade, and practicing for around six or seven, I have been blessed. Blessed by having the opportunity to train a girl whom is a true submissive. Whose very core yearns for the release of responsibility, the gifting of power to another.
As I have done my utmost to be a dependable (and sexy) teacher/guide/master/lover for her I have been repeatedly surprised at how often she would intuit ideas, philosophies, and safe, sane practices without the need for much, if any guidance in some cases.
I am less a teacher, and more a guide, for this one. Merely ensuring that she continues to walk the safest and most fulfilling path along her journey of self discovery. For I am quite sure that with or without me, she will end up a fabulous submissive. (That's not to say she's free game. All mine. fuck off, you bastards. )
As she first finally gave the signal that she was ready to give all that we had previously discussed, I watched the shift in her eyes even as I intentionally settled the Mantle of 'Dominant' and 'Master' about my own shoulders. Her body language altered in a dozen oh-so-tiny and hard to quantify ways.
When I took her the first time, she reacted with abandon, with passion, and with an intense need to be satisfying.
When I took her the twentieth time, she had not faded, had not given into the looming shadow of ennui, but instead was even more adept at being the most pleasing girl I have ever, ever had the joy of claiming.
Over the course of my life, I've been with a fair few women. Some of them were what modern American society idolizes. Skinny, with long legs and big tits. -Snorts- They were boring, mere tired, wrinkled old whores in comparison. Not only is my pet a fascinating partner on the sexual side of things, but she took to every new aspect that I showed as a bird might take to the air.
It was humbling to watch first hand. I like to think I have some talent at this, have some skill. But in the end she will be a far better submissive than I am a Dominant.
She finds just as much pleasure, though in different fashions, in simply kneeling before me, head upon my thigh.. as she does in being bent over a bed and roughly worked over till her knees weaken and her breath comes in gasps.
Of course, we'd set up a safe word. But she never had to really use it. We slid into what was comfortable (especially me, muahaha), and never left it behind.
How many new submissives do you know who would willingly go out in short skirt, revealing top, stockings, garter belts, boots.. and then collared and leashed. A leash someone /else/ holds.
How many do you know who would then be /eager/ to hand the leash back whenever you returned? At a night club. in a city she didn't know. During her first weekend as a fully submitted little fucktoy.
I've never met one before, to be honest.
I would write more, and likely will. But those things are not for your eyes. I shall end on this note.
She is my perfection. My lover, my pet, my other half, my fucktoy.
My girl.
And I will continue to cherish her, love her, even as I push her further, and deeper, into her service to me. |
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Life, itself, is neither simple nor is it hard. Life is neither suffering, nor is it joy. Life is not punishment nor is it some great reward.
Life is none of these things alone. Life is not defined by any particular reason or rhyme, it's purpose is not something to be defined by mere human words and expressions, hopes. Grasping, futilely, to try and define what it is that has brought us here. What reason we have for being different from all other beings on earth, and even perhaps, in existence.
Why do we have sentience? Why do we have thought? Why do we have Emotions? Is the Soul real? Were we created by some great omniscient, omnipotent being that is everywhere, everywhen?
Or perhaps are we simply a freak matter of evolution, a fortunate mistake in genetics and nature created by naught else but raw chance and the right circumstances?
I do not know. I frequently ponder these things during the long nights, awake in my room. Reading, writing, talking to people thousands of miles away or just a few streets.
As always, I never find a definitive answer. I have studied christianity, buddism, Taoism. I've delved into the complexities of evolution and genetics. I have spent hours and even days praying, and more recently meditating. Trying to find the answer for this most pressing of questions. If not the answer for everyone.. perhaps just the answer that feels right to me.
I have yet to find that.
I do not go a day, an hour, without wondering about some tangent of this most intriguing and important of subjects.
But truthfully.. is it really all that important?
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Lets get this straight.
I do not serve you. It is not my place to make sure your every whim and fantasy is fulfilled. It is not my duty to cater to your needs, wants and desires.
It is, however, my responsibility to see that you are safe, content, and remain healthy within my care.
It is my place to guide, to teach, to protect.
It is my duty to respect your hard and soft limits, respectively.
These are vows, they are duties bound by my honor and the title I hold.
But do not mistake it...
Within this codefied set of guidelines for behaivor.
I am the one in charge.
Nor am I the only one with responsibilities, duties, and vows to uphold.
Stop trying to convince me otherwise. You may as well try to convince Mt. Everest that it would be better to have a warm climate.
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I'm going to be frank.
I don't trust women.
It's not because I think they are naturually deceitful, or cheating whores, or some other poppycock like that.
But I have little faith in the fairer sex, anymore. It's kind of funny, in a way, I lost faith in my own gender long ago.
Don't expect me to be nice to you all the time just because you're a woman. I'll treat you the same as everyone else. Just don't get offended when I hold you at a distance.
Oh, and if you think I'm whining?
I care more about the lint in my laundry than I care about your opinion of my opinions.
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Lets this over with Right Now. I do not care if you approve of me. It's so simple that I don't seem to understand why so many here seem unable to grasp it. "Gasp! Male! And Young! And Dominant! How dare you!" I dare because I will not deny who I am for your pleasure. "Maybe you should try submitting sometime. You might like it." No, I don't like it. I've had my experiences with submission and it left a sour taste in my mouth. "You need to be older before you can claim to be a Dom, let alone a Master." I've been studying this lifestyle, practicing it, and bettering myself to be ready for that title since I was fifteen years old. Yes, I was young. Get over it. "A true Dom has had a mentor, learned from someone more experienced." I did. Moving on. "Are you mormon? You're in utah, mormons cant be Doms." No. I'm not mormon, but your thought that they cant proves how ignorant you are. "What do you mean you don't care what I think? I'm older than you!" Respect thine elders? Phah. I respect everyone at the same base level. It's called treating people like they're /people/. Submissive, Dominant, Male, Female, Young or Old. You will all get the same respect from me until you prove you are worth more.. or less. "How Dare You act like you have the right to judge me." I'm not judging you, and that's your problem. I'm not judging in your favor before I get to know you, just based on who and what you say are. Deal, move on. "You're mean! You're just a stuck up bastard." Cry me a river. I'm nice to the people who deserve it.
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| Age: 36 |
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Kentucky |
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