A year ago I started to explore my submissiveness. I had ideas and fantasies about BDSM but absolutely no experience. I had ideas of what BDSM “must” be. I was in reality very naïve about submission. Little did I realize that BDSM means a variety of things and that it is very important for me as a sub/slave to find the right Dom/Master to serve.
When I did move from fantasy into reality, I found a Master who agreed to take me on as a training project. He set up a training program and has spent the last eight months working with me. Over these months, I have gained a broad range of experience and a much better understanding of who I am, what I need, and my limitations. My training has been very challenging. I have worked very hard to please Him by learning the lessons He designed for me. I have learned to trust my training Master deeply. This experience has been a great learning time.
When my Master agreed to train me, we both agreed that it would be a short-term relationship. We both have long-term needs that can’t be met in that relationship. We still meet regularly and are in contact daily. However, we both agree that the time has come for me to move on. He has agreed to help me in my search for a long term Master and will help me transition into a situation that better fulfills my long-term needs. He will review the answers and has agreed to advise me on how I should proceed. He wrote the following description describing me and what I need:
"This slave seeks a long-term relationship that includes her commitment to her Master as his slave as well as an ongoing regular relationship that would include friendship, affection, and a long-term commitment (not necessarily marriage). she is single and seeks a Master who is also single and can commit the time to her training that she needs and wants.
"she is a slave who is challenging to own and train. she has a very strong sense of 'justice' and 'fairness' and a strong need to be heard. Occasionally her temper gets the best of her and she has had to be punished for it on more than one occasion. she is very smart and is not the kind of slave that will follow commands mindlessly.
"she is very interested in pleasing her Master. she works very hard to do what he wants her to do. she has submitted to a variety of very difficult tasks to please Him. she gets very upset with herself if she fails Him.
"As far as specifics regarding her experience and what her limits are, it is safe to say that for the right Master she would be willing to do many things to please Him. she does not do well with extreme humiliation. she has explored a wide variety of pain elements (her training Master is a Sadist), she is NOT a 'pain slut' but she is very willing to endure fairly high levels of pain to please.
"she is very self conscious about her physical appearance. she is very honest about the fact that she is a super sized BBW. Any Master who owns her would have to accept this. her weight is a huge self image issue for her; her new Master would have to invest time in helping her get past this. With her training Master, He was able to get her past this with Him, but it took time."