|
|
|  | |  | |
|
|
|
ThunderRoad
|
|
|
|
trappedinamuseum
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I just want to learn about all of this. Not looking for any play or quick fun. I'm not looking to be collared either.
You will notice that every so often my state changes. That's just an indication of travel.
In general I'm a young woman just trying to get my bearings and figure out what I want. Trying to understand why this appeals to me.
I am neither submissive, nor dominant. I am myself and that's that.
Anyways, if you just want to chat, drop me a line. I'll shoot the breeze about anything, though I can't promise much knowledge for certain subjects!
|
|
|
|
|
...Is it wrong of me to be seriously miffed when people use "online protocol"? Because the whole capitalization thing bothers me. I'm a little bit particular about such and I tend to ignore the "online D/s protocol" concept of only capitalizing things referring to dominants and not capitalizing things that refer to submissives. I know it's knit-picky but it rubs me the wrong way because it's improper English.
|
|
|
|
|
Definitely things have changed. |
|
|
|
|
As of today if I am on here, yell at me. I am not supposed to be on here any more. For reasoning, see post below.
-Thank you |
|
|
|
|
I have decided it is time I left. I've too many issues to deal with within myself to be worth anything to anyone.
Hmmm... I better add a sense of self-worth to that list of issues, it would appear.
To put it simply, I need to get my life in order, so I can actually maybe get what I want, and actually earn it, instead of having it handed to me like the spoilt brat I know I am.
This is essentially my goodbye.
I would like to apologize to anyone whose messages I read and never replied to. I meant to... I just never got to it.
To those I consider friends.... I will miss you.
I'll stick around for a few days... Long enough to finish my goodbyes, and deal with any promises I made...
With any luck, I will fade from all your memories... and life will go on as it should.
In all sincerity and in perfect serenity, with a strong dose of determination....
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl
In case it matters... I might come back once I've gotten my act together. Until then, best wishes to you all.
And no... I'm not collared. If I was I'd say so. |
|
|
|
|
Mmm I'm once more in one of my cheerful states of emotion, the one where I push everyone away as best I can because I want desperately to draw them near and find comfort in their closeness.
I'm not really sure the root cause of it, it's been building up for several days now. I've been realizing a few things. Do not ask, I do not want to talk about them.
Been working on the job issue some more. Not sure if I will have any luck. Here's hoping though. It would be at least a bright spot for me to look forward to...
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
Wondering softly, dark whispers
Yet still, even darker dreamings
A question
Do you so long for death's embrace?
Perhaps
Shivering
Harsh words spoken in true anger, harden the heart of the one who loved
Teasing pieces of memory, of something beyond the ashes and whispers
Of some far away scent, teasing the hunter with promise
To throw away the complete knowledge, the one who loved weeps
Remember in this discarding, also was discarded the one who loved
A lifetime and more ago.... |
|
|
|
|
Just got another lovely "please dominate/command me" message. Where do these people come from? Do I really seem "Domme" to them? It was such a fantastic form letter, you have no idea. I wonder if anyone received the delightfully ignorant message with any positive regard. It was quite amusing, when I do not look at it from a stand-point of being sent a misplaced message.
Do these people live under rocks? Or are they so blissfully ignorant that they feel any female will be delighted to receive their message of drivel? That any female, including a submissive female such as myself, will obligingly dominate them? |
|
|
|
|
Anyone who got a snarky reply from me today, please bare with me. I haven't slept in a good number of hours, and my judgement is less wonderful than normal. To everyone else, have a fantastic day! |
|
|
|
|
Peculiar thoughts have been running through my head lately.
Been real low emotionally. Cannot understand why though... Oh well. |
|
|
|
|
I need to get a job confirmation, and then I need to move out... Before I have no place to live at all...
Wish me luck?
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
In all honesty I had not realized that I would become the target for wank-fodder, booty-calls, or general disrespect as a human being by joining this site. How naive of me to forget human nature is not so kind or good.
I have been commanded to submit by men who couldn't control themselves, let alone me. How truly sad.
I have been approached by submissives to top/play with them. Go away already, I don't want to top/dom you.
I have been asked numerous sexual questions.
Enough already! I am sick of having these questions asked so soon after initiating conversation. I am not here for you to get your jollies off. I am here for honesty, knowledge. Not to entertain you. Not to be what gets you off tonight.
It really is almost enough to drive me off of this site, except I enjoy forums far too much to leave. However, as fair warning... Do not be surprised if I do not reply to you, or if I block you on messenger, if you disrespect me or if you ask questions I feel inappropriate continually, even after I have requested you stop asking.
Alright, rant over. Thank you.
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
I've been asked recently what my involvement in my local BDSM community was.
My reply: I wouldn't know where to find my local BDSM community unless it came up and bit me on the ass.
So I am wondering if there is one here... I figure there is, I just want a confirmation there is one locally. Otherwise I can hang out in one of the bigger cities seeking. *shudders* I do not like big cities. Too many people, too much noise... |
|
|
|
|
More not-goodness in my life. Yay. Ok, seriously, Powers That Be, gimme a fricken break already. Leave me alone... I don't know what I did to deserve this karmic bitch-slap, but enough already... |
|
|
|
|
Not having the best day today. Those I consider friend, will know why. I prefer not to talk about it to anyone else.
Very unhappy,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
Hey!
Um yeah... Still no job. I hate trying to get a job after the holiday season is over. Nobody seems to be hiring.
I need a fulltime job, and I want to move out. But I need the job to move out.
I feel lonely. But that happens when I choose to stay awake when others sleep. I hate feeling alone, and lonely. It brings me to want arms around me, letting me know I am not alone...
Or maybe that is just my normal love of being held... Only amplified by the loneliness.
My mind confuses me.
Have fun!
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
Hallo!
Just updating to let everyone reading this know, I've been having a few issues with stability... I'm still looking for a job that will hopefully not suck my soul out of my body.
Also... the moving out thing... Really really want to move out. I have all kinds of cookware, so I shall not starve.
I also have a bowl-chair, a bed, a table for my laptop, my laptop, and my dressers. Not to mention various decorative items (wall-hanging, door-cover, vases, art work)
So I can feed myself and live in a nice looking place. Now all I need is things for drying and sleeping... heh.
Slowly preparing,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl
P.S. Sorry for being slow and lazy about replying to messages. I don't mean to be... |
|
|
|
|
Well, guess what I haven't done yet? That's right, I have not found a job... Or slept since yesterday!! Weee!!
I hope I don't get hyper... because that is just freaky when I am completely sleep deprived.
I spent my New Year's Eve watching my cousin for my aunt while she had to work. ^_^ I love doing things for my family. They are, after all, my family and anything I can do to make life easier... is done gladly.
Well anyways... Um... I forget what I was going to say... Heh... Maybe I should sleep for a few hours...
Tiredly,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl
|
|
|
|
|
Hello everyone,
I'll say I've been having a time of things lately. Lots of fun emotional drama. I'm sick of it, to be frankly honest. I am tired of my family's bickering, and I am tired of my ex's not going away and leaving me be.
I will be trying to get a full time job, as I just cannot take school any more... I need to move out as well. I am so tired of my family's nosiness, pushing me, of being smothered and over protected.
Annoyed and frustrated,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl
|
|
|
|
|
Well today started out so great, it was so perfect. A happy morning, with joking and laughter... I got practical presents, the kind for when one has their own place. (I asked for these specifically)
Then... then... came the screaming and arguing... And my family wonders why I hide in my own little world of my room and listen to music as loud as I can stand... It's because it hurts... to hear my family in such discord... It hurts...
Maybe I am too sensitive... But to hear them scream and argue... I can't do anything to stop it... all I can do is hope it ends...
I just wish I knew why they argued so much...
Cold, lonely, and saddened in Wisconsin,
Iila Starfire |
|
|
|
|
Well, I went and made some mistakes. I feel miserable over it. That's all that needs to be said on the subject.
Rather sad, as the flight my visiting relatives were supposed to be on was delayed by the bad weather over at our airport, so they are stuck in Detroit right now. Who knows when we'll get to see them. I do hope we can see them soon!
On a more positive note, I have all my holiday shopping done, as of yesterday.
Update: My cousins and aunt will be arriving by bus, because the 1:20 flight they were rescheduled for was cancled. The airport is kindly bussing them this way, so I will finally get to see the three family members I see very rarely. I'm rather excited!
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
Well, finals are done and over with... For this semester any ways! I am sooo glad to be done with them. The only one I feel any certainty of passing is my Spanish Exam.
My friend came back home yesterday! I am all up on starlight and moonbeams, you bet! I haven't seen her in about 5 months.... She's as close as a sister, and she means as much to me. She's always been there for me, and helped me figure things out. She tends to help me see the things I do not wish to... i.e. My last ex was a fan of emotional manipulation, guilt trips, and verbal abuse. Which is why I run away from anyone who like verbal humiliation...
My cousins and aunt have their plane arrive Saturday, so I won't be here after 4pm CST, sicne they should be here then. Also another aunt and cousin, as well as an uncle, will be spending Christmas Eve with us. Because that is the day my family celebrates Christmas... I can never remember why though... Ah well.
Until next time,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
Well I've found some promising prospects as far as Dominants I might consider.
No one I'm going to sign my self over to on a permanent basis yet. I haven't even gotten to first meets yet for the prospects I am most interested in. Mostly due to either distance or my lack of a car.
I have found some who will be very dear friends to me. You know who you are, darlings!
Well, until I decide to post something up again,
Iila Starfire, Wisconsin Girl |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
| Age: 25 |
| Perth NOR,
Australia |
|
|
|
| | |
