Harpy ISO a male domestic and houseboy servant - weekends ONLY

I am a whore! I want free stuff and I don't even like men! I am a man!

your weekly (or semi-monthly) duties will include:

Cleaning My apartment:
Bring a hard hat and steel toed shoes, dumpster, pallet jack, bulldozer, sundried other personal protective equipment including high risk gloves, masks, Scott Airpack, face shield, union card and permit for local landfill.

Laundry and cooking skills are not required as you’ll be paying my laundry service and cooking is not permitted in my apartment by order of the local fire commissioner.

**I am also seeking one who is great at closet organization - clothing, shoes and just about everything else as there is in much need of organization** ( I can not be helped!)

Household errands will include: Buying me free food which will rot in my fridge, delivery and pick-up of my laundry which ought to be burned, free food!!! These expenses are to be covered by servant.

WEEKENDS ONLY with the POSSIBLE exception: 8:00 pm - 11:00pm - 1 night per week

You will abide by My House Rules: You will serve while completely naked, except for the wearing of a collar, and possibly other accoutrements as I see proper.


Disobedience is not tolerated, and corporal punishment will be administered if you do not follow my Charges and Directives to the letter.

I require the following:

1) Recent photograph (w/o sunglasses)

2) you will send Me proof of your identity prior to coming over. This will include full name, DOB, SSN and address- documentation sufficient for stealing your identity- NO exceptions made. PERIOD.

3) Someone who does not smoke (however, note that I do), and who is health conscious. Bonus points if you know how many pints of green tea it takes to burn off a McDonald’s #5 happy meal with bacon, cheese and a diet soda!!

4) boy will be responsible for take-out meals, delivery and paying for laundry, errands, gifts and grocery shopping. Bring your wallet and kiss your credit rating goodbye!

5) WEEKENDS only! (exception noted above)

6) I do Not accept 'chat requests'.
If I wish to speak to you - I WILL.


When responding -confirm that you:

1) acknowledge the above 6 pre-requisites and state that you are in complete compliance, in addition to

2) providing Me with your schedule of availability, and

3) send a recent photograph (clothed) of yourself - w/o sunglasses.


***This is a one time deal! I do not value you, your time or the hundreds of dollars you’ll spend bringing groceries, expensive cat food, artificial logs, enema kits and candles to my tudor hovel!***

I am not interested in what you want done to you - read My profile again: I seek free food, free cat food, free salmon patte…


Oral servants and boy sluts are NOT welcomed as this position is not for you.