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| I believe that my role as a man is to lead, to have self-control and be the calmness that makes a woman feel comfortable in her rightful place. He should make her feel that she is serving a valuable purpose by giving herself to please him and satisfy his desires. I have had enough experience to understand that relationships depend upon each individual doing their best to meet the others' needs. So what do I need? Ideally, the right match for me would be somebody who I can develop enough intimacy with to lead, teach and help them grow to reach their full potential. Someone who will respond to me and meet my sexual needs out of a desire to please me. ?I will be honest though, because the type of relationship I am seeking requires honesty and trust, more than the typical relationship does. I am in a completely loveless marriage which I only maintain because my little girls need me to tuck them at night and be there whenever they need me to dance with them. ?For now I must stay and do what is best for my kids. I want the intimacy, physical affection, and attraction that I have been denied. I will provide the same to you if you are open minded and can respect the need to remain discreet for now and establish a trust that will enable us to explore the possibilities. I know this is asking a lot but if you are a match and choose to submit to me I will act to meet your needs and fulfill your fantasies. My sexual desires are definitely kinky and might even seem extreme to some but I will not ask you to do anything illegal, medically dangerous (I am disease free, you must be too) or cause real harm to you. I am a patient and selective man and if you are interested we must both be aware of everything that this can potentially offer. For privacy reasons, I have not posted a face pic on my profile but I will provide one to you upon request. I do not use the chat feature here, but if you msg me I will respond and we can chat through yahoo. Feel free to ask me any questions, I do try to honestly respond to all real and serious inquiries.
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I have received a lot of support and admiration from women who message me about my commitment to stay in my marriage for the sake of my daughters. I am sorry to say that I am not strong enough to maintain that for as long as I thought. Originally I thought I could do it until they were out of school. But now it looks like the end is very near. Not more than a year or two. Whatever minimizes the damage to them. I will keep them in their house, take them to and from school and be part of their daily lives. But I can't live this lie anymore and they will never get to see a "normal" relationship by witnessing their mother and I. So...sorry if I disappointed you and most of all sorry if I hurt them. But it's just killing me. Got to move on. |
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There is nothing quite like a girl who gets excited by extreme acts. When she thinks that it's hot to be pushed to do what most people won't to demonstrate her submission it is SO exciting. It's even better when she wants to do it to show how willing she is to serve and ultimately to show how intimate the connection is with her. |
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I was surprised to receive so much feedback and support regarding my last journal entry. It really meant a lot to me. Sometimes I just feel trapped and frustrated and have to let it out. Just so you know I do want to explain that the chance for me to have my needs fulfilled by her have long passed. Even if she did what I need a woman to do, I don't want her to. Those opportunities existed for her but now they are gone. I have moved on emotionally even though I can't move on in other ways yet because of my situation. But I think it will be and hope the sacrifice will be worth it for my children. I do want to say one last thing to all of you women who are submissive. You are absolutely the nicest people in the whole world. I do hope that all of are able to get your needs fulfilled because you deserve to have your dreams and desires become a reality. You really do and I appreciate you so much. |
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I don't know if anyone reads these journal entries or not, but I just need to get this out. I wish that I could live in the light. I wish that I had a wife that I love to come home to and share my life with. I am so sick and tired of being trapped, stuck with someone who I don't love, don't really like, but having to pretend that we have a happy home every day of my life, simply for the sake of maintaining that environment for my children. I guess it is worth the sacrifice but GOD it is hard. To know that your wife will not and CAN NOT meet your needs even if she started doing the right things, because everything that she neglected to do during our years together completely severed any connection that I could ever had with her. And not being able to tell her that, just like that, because I know it will destroy my little girls' home. I hate it when everyone tells me that she's so lucky to have me, that she wasted her opportunities with me, and know that the BEST that I can do is to live in the dark, maybe have a friend with benefits or perhaps a secret girlfriend but never have the chance to HAVE someone who will be mine, who I can take as my own, who can claim me as theirs. At least not until my children have left the house. But even then? What then? To be in my early to mid 50s at that point in time, and be looking for the love of my life. Doesn't look good. Maybe the best I can have for the rest of my LIFE is to have a girlfriend or friend with benefits. I do age well and I will always commit to keeping myself in excellent condition but come on. My opportunities won't exactly multiply with time. You know, all of this revelation or whining or whatever you want to call it to whomever is reading it (if anyone) may not sound very dominant. But I don't care. I have to be honest. In fact I wish I could be honest with my wife but I'm not going to risk that for my children's sake. I know what I am so I don't get wrapped up in the definitions of what a dom is and should be and all that silly B.S. I just know what I need, and sometimes feel like I am just getting to taste, to window shop, but fear that I never will get the chance to take what I need home and claim it as mine. In the meantime, I will have to learn to live with enjoying what I can have, even if it never measures up to what I really need. |
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Seems like so many want a LTR or live-in situation right away. Well that takes a long time to develop, and I am unable to remove myself from my situation in the near future, so I can't relocate anyone or have anyone move in. If you are interested you will have to be patient, have a lot of conversations with me, develop that trust over the years, and wait for me if you truly want to be mine in real time. Having an online exchange is a great way to share what is in each other's mind, and although the physical attraction is a prerequisite for me, it is the mind and soul and what it can produce that is much more important |
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