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| Update: I've been away for a few years, and my situation is substantially changed. I'm in a serious and ongoing open relationship, with a game and generous partner that doesn't have a sub bone in her lovely body. This means I'm looking for an occasional partner or ongoing playmate only. Somebody who is open or poly and not getting her sub-time in her other life seems ideal.
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Thanks in advance for reading this, and good luck. I am a natural sadist and Dominant (although little "d" is fine), and was aware of these pleasures before pubescence, although it took a little for me while to get used to the idea, and the process, as well as self-discovery, is on-going. While I have tied all of my girlfriends up, at least, from time to time, it was in a relationship ten years ago which I discovered the depth of my darker passions and the possibilities inherent in sharing them with an enthusiastic partner. For some people, this does not make me "experienced," and indeed I do not "scene" or "munch" or have a lot of desire to get very engaged in any arbitrary community, bdsm or otherwise. I do, however, want to continue to explore my dominant sexuality.
So I'm here to talk to people and meet likely partners. I prefer people who know something about what they like but are willing to explore, and I'm interested in going beyond where I have been before.
I am literate and need the same in anyone who would play with me; I am an artist and a grown-up person. I look forward to hearing from the sharp, quirky submissive (or maybe even slave) out there that has a taste for adventure, behind closed doors and otherwise. Ask if you want to know more, and take care.
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Another interesting and enjoyable woman has come my way and gone. I couldn't suspend my disbelief, somehow, and had, sadly, to end it.
But our meeting did provide me, among other things, with further verification of my long-held theory that we have ways to find one another, even in vanilla settings. The first time she and I made out, I turned her over roughly and gave a good solid smack to her backside, and she twisted her head toward me and gasped, "How did you know?"
How gratifying!
I think there are a million non-verbal cues that we're putting out without being aware of them, and that allow us to find one another through the interference of the bland world without. I hope that, while not being my sub, she remains my friend, and I know that in time, whether we meet in kink or otherwise, that I shall find my girl. |
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Well, nothing lasts forever. Until something does, at least.
What does one do with one's contract, when the other party proves fickle, heartless, and timid? Is that a momento one keeps? |
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All these months have passed, and every surpassed expectation has been against outstripped in turn.
My good girl and I are finalizing our 24/7 contract, a development I had not myself foreseen, but which has grown naturally (but not without conflict) between us.
I did not truly believe that I would find a submissive whose gift was so rich and undeniable. I think we are very lucky, and I hope that you too should have such good fortune.
Stay well, and stay in touch, friends. |
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I have found someone who surpasses any expectation I might have had. |
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And onward we go.
It's remarkable how difficult it can be to find the subtle alchemy between people that allows an on-going, profound connection. Doubly so when one party knows what he wants and the other is wholly willing to acquiesce.
So we keep learning and discovering and experimenting, and work toward that best within us, and onward we go. |
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Perhaps my rough run has seen out its course for a bit. At any rate, my housing crisis is resolved happily, and there'll be no more puppy yapping at my heels.
In addition, I have met a captivating and eager sub-girl, and we are exploring one another, most rewardingly.
I wish everyone here such a promising season. . . |
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On Cats, Dogs, and Training:
My housing situation went to the dogs recently. It did so in stages, but thoroughly. Not only have I got roommates again, which is ghastly enough, but recently, one brought home a puppy. Now, I like animals (so much in fact that I won't even eat them), and this puppy is cuter than cute...
However. These people should not have a pet at all. Let alone an ill-used, untrained puppy. They are in over their heads, and this poor dumb creature is at their mercy. And not "at mercy" for fun, but for real.
The point of all this is that I am faced with an untrained non-human animal for a change. And I don't like it. I have picked up some of the slack for these fools, but I have my own limits. If I wanted a dog, I'd get one. But there is some benefit to me, in self-understanding.
If I were to keep a non-human pet, it would be a cat. And I think the same applies, as it were, to human pets. To my mind, cats are independent, cats have dignity, cats attempt (at least) to enter into a reciprocal relationship with their owners. Whereas dogs are loyal, messy, undignified, and shameless. I will forego a level of loyalty in favour of the (interesting) challenge of will against will with an equal or potential equal, as opposed to the (not interesting [to me]) challenge of training a glob of protoplasm not to soil itself.
To put perhaps too fine a point on it, the pleasure of power exchange for me lies in the subjugation of a purely worthy and strong being, albeit one who wishes to be subjugated. Brats, idiots, slavish followers, and the like, don't meet one halfway; they present resistance without substance, or they present unearned servitude. I have no objection to that for others, but no puppies for me, thanks.
Have fun and be well. |
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I am all afire about new forms of rope bandage, suddenly. I had a series of small epiphanies about the arts of tying, and saw and read some good kinbaku things as well, and so have a new fever, but need to find the right subject. Asymmetry is great, and I want to learn more about suspension, but more generally am just overflowing with ideas about decorative, long-term, complex, subtle, secret, and probably still other possibilities.
Since I lack a proper model, I have been drawing various schemes, and it really is exciting. The possibilities seem endless, and the process of discovery is gratifying in its own right. Rope just kicks ass. Especially on the right body. |
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Oh, the ever-expanding perv. . .
Recent events and considerations have congealed something in my consciousness that had never before been fully formed. Unfortunately, it's a kink relegated to the realm of pure fantasy, not something i'll ever get to do for real. perhaps it wwill lead to interesting play, though.
I am become aware again of a longstanding kidnap and training fantasy, that dates back well into my early teens or before, but which has never been an element of my adult kink life. Specifically, I wish to capture some hot but clueless chica, some girl from the wrong side of the tracks, with the trapping of ignorance and poverty, and pull a rough Pygmalion on her. Off she goes, clawing and kicking, into my well-hidden secret den, where I hose her off, give her her shots, and begin to transform her - not only for my service (although you bet that's included) - but for her own vast betterment. Lesson in etiquette and deportment, but also literature and history and languages, on posture and diet and hygiene, on philosophy.
I would have chosen the subject based on some spark in her eye, some possibility wasted in her normal, limited world, and over the months and years I would see the realization of that promise, watch my captive turn from stunted hatchling to majestic swan, thoughtful and engaged and, of course, thoroughly mine.
Alas, there are certain laws, and the girls in reality who are smart enough to appreciate me are not likely ever to manage a convincing imitation of the desired urchin. She remains a creature I see on nearly every subway and street corner, forever inviolable and lost.
Addendum: A thoughtful sub wrote to tell me how offensive she found this entry. I wrote and explained further, from which this is an exerpt:
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I am from the wrong side of the tracks myself; I grew up in a trailer park. The instance that sparked this fantasy, when I was eighteen and pretty clueless, was a girl who worked at the same damned Burger King I did. She could have been achingly beautiful, but she was a mess, she was literally rather dirty, she lived no doubt in some squallid hole with some evil, messed up family - I wanted to save her, and at the same time there was unmistakably something power-mad and perverse in my desire.
Living in New York, where there is so much poverty, I see these lovely, pitiful girls every day, and I feel this pull, but, as I said, nothing like that could ever really happen.
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I am curious as to whether others are freaked out about this; I have also been told that it's hot by some. If you have an opinion, I would like to hear it . . . |
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A pleasant surprise:
I experienced my first Daddy/little girl scene (or whatever the hell you want to call it) last night, and really enjoyed it. Not something I was actively in search of, but something that grew out of other things (like my first play party several weeks ago), I found it surprisingly hot. I guess we don't know everything about what might connect with something inside until we find out by surprise. I could have said "the hard way," but I resist that sort of impulse on aesthetic principles.
Regardless, I am going to spend some more time with the "innocent little girl" in question, and I am happy to find that I have not ossified completely, but can still find a new form of play exciting. Everyone should be so lucky. |
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Complaint dept.:
Why are so few people on this site (or others) either willing to use the space provided to actually say something about themselves, or to bother to spell anything right? For example, "dominate" is a verb, as in "I dominate you," whereas "dominant" is an adjective, as in "I am a dominant male." So in the hundreds of ads "Seeking dominate male," well, you just don't make any sense.
This is a place for people presenting themselves to the world; why present yourself as an idiot?
And for that matter, ads like "SWF seeking LTR with attractive, strong SWM, 33-40" don't tell us very much. What kind of LTR? Who are you, what do you like? Help out a little!
Finally, to those of you who are not guilty of the above, thank you for taking the time to think about what you have to say and saying it clearly.
Best luck to everybody. Keep trying and learning and having fun. |
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