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| I am here because I can no longer ignore my need to have BDSM be part of my life, even if it is a small part. I am married and while my wife is submissive in the bedroom its not something that she does full time, and she's certainly not into as many kinky or hardcore things in that area. I'm not really sure what I'm looking for here, though it's not someone to bring into our bedroom while she's not looking. Though, I may do some cyber now and then but even that is becoming a rare occurence. Mostly, you can find me on SecondLife to satisfy my more hard core kink along with my need to be dominant. My wife doesn't necessarily like the idea, but I don't hide it from her. As far as what I'm looking for here, well, I wouldn't mind an online romance. Let me be clear, online is very likely as far as it would go, but I really don't like saying "never" no matter how remote the possibility and I do consider it a VERY remote possibility. There's a better chance that I'll win the lottery. A friend or a mentor would be great too as I come here to learn a little bit more about the lifestyle and I honestly don't have really any real world experience. I have done a decent amount of reading blogs, BDSM websites that are actually geared towards learning about the lifestyle and not just erotic picture galleries, as well as a book or two, along with online domination within the world of SecondLife. And through these mediums, I've found that the more I learn about it, the more it appeals to me and the more I really just want to learn all I can. For me, so far, BDSM is so much more about what happens between your ears than between your legs. Sex is really just one aspect of it, and really not even the most important aspect. In Michael Mikai's book, "Domination and Submission : The BDSM handbook" he writes that one of the questions a dominant should ask himself is, "Would you still want to be a Dominant, even if it meant that there would be absolutely no sex involved?" At this point in my life, the answer is yes. I'll admit, it's a little bit of a begrudging yes, but a yes all the same.
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