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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Slave/Dom Couple, 39/39,  Bromley, United Kingdom
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GabrielleSlave - slave

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GabrielleSlave - photo 9
GabrielleSlave - photo 10

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Friends:
ElvesUKmrboofunnygothMalstromeGreedyTop
houseproudMastrSlayerrobmosimonrossBlazeDeLight
AlwaysthebossDaddyandgirlyYoyo22oneseriousmaster

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i am Mastrslayer's slave, so i politely ask that Doms and Dommes please respect that. However, I am now a switch with the will and capacity to make male sub's lives a misery ;-) so make of that what you will....


You can message me and ask anything you like, i will be as honest and open as i can and expect you do do the same. Master is not often on CM, but anything you say to me is always passed on to keep Him updated.

More about Uus:

Wwe are a lifestyle 24/7 Master/slave couple. Although Wwe don't live together, Wwe spend as much time together as Wwe can. Wwe enjoy meeting people at the Greenwich Munch (which Wwe run) and enjoy clubs, where there are more real people lol! Wwe have hopes and dreams just as anyone else does as well as interests outside BDSM.

Wwe are looking (isn't everyone) for genuine people; couples or individuals to get to know and maybe play with. Master has many ideas for scenarios involving others and Wwe have been fortunate recently to have been able to play with some lovely people.

Hope to meet you soon!


BTW, just a couple of things i find annoying... i will know if you have not read my profile properly, or Master's! Please do not ask for friendship if you have not even bothered to talk to me first. Oh and one more thing ... for heaven's sake, if you cannot use English in the way it is supposed to be used, just do not waste your time in contacting me.

Hugs

Gabrielle x

Founder and host of the
Rather Marvelous Greenwich Munch!



SRN - 244-005-097

Username:

Description:

City:

Country:

Joined:

Last Online:

 GabrielleSlave

 Slave/Dom

 Bromley 

 United Kingdom

 09/20/07

 12/27/11

Partner:

Gender Identity:

Sexuality:

Orientation:

Height:

Weight:

Age:

Ethnicity:

 Female

 Hetero

 Slave

 5' 5"

 125 lbs

 39

 Caucasian

Partner:

Gender Identity:

Sexuality:

Orientation:

Height:

Age:

Ethnicity:

 Male

 Hetero

 Dominant

 6' 0"

 39

 Caucasian

Actively Seeking:

Submissive Transgender

Submissive Male

Friends Only

 Lives For:

 Blindfolds

 Bondage

 Canes and Crops

 Collars

 Masks (On Partner)

 Munches

 Spanking

 Vibrators

 Wax play

 Lifestyle BDSM

 Loves:

 Corner Time

 Corsets

 Exhibitionism

 Local BDSM Community

 Hair Pulling

 Leashes

 Mental Bondage

 Orgasm Denial

 Outdoor Bondage

 Plastic Wrap

 Pony/Puppy Roleplay

 Public Play

 Role Playing

 Sensory Deprivation

 Whips

 Likes:

 Breast Play

 Cages

 Electrical Play

 Humiliation

 Obedience Training

 Objectification

 Tolerates:

 Anal Play

 Curious About:

 Needle Play

 Suspension

 Theatrical Scenes

 Hard Limits:

 Fire Play

 Knife Play

 Tickling

 Country Music

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Journal Entries:
7/4/2011 2:03:07 PM

The dungeon exists...... It is the most wonderful space I have ever been in....

 

Oh by the way... I am now a switch lol!


11/18/2010 5:39:12 AM

As the more mundane parts of the building mularky start to come towards an end, Oour minds can ponder the more interesting concept of turning the remaining space into the dungeon.

Wwe are not quite ready to start, but it needs thinking about. Wwe shall have to insulate for both sound and acoustic purposes in both the outside walls and the roof. The flooring needs to go down and a decision needs to be made about what to do with the now internal pebble dashed wall. i realise that there will be a school of thought that will say for Uus to keep the wall as it is....'s' types will be more compliant when threatened with a brush up against it... But i am not sure...accidents on both sides of the kneel could happen and i am pretty sure that i would not want to come across a Dom whose knuckles have been accidentally rid of their skin.....hmmm...

Yes this all needs thinking about....and thinking about it is making me smile lots lol! {#}


11/16/2010 3:37:19 AM

ROYAL WEDDING!!!

There's nothing like a wedding announcement to put a smile on your face on a cold day!  William has proposed to Kate at long last!  i send the couple my congratulations and best wishes for a beautiful day and a long and happy happy life together {#}


11/16/2010 1:48:02 AM

Feeling chirpy today!


11/15/2010 10:06:40 AM

Happiness is a slave who knows her place {#}


11/15/2010 3:25:21 AM

Just put up details of the Greenwich Munch Christmas Party on all the websites i am on so look it up and get ready!

To help, i have put links to the most comprehensive information below

www.greenwichmunch.co.uk


www.informedconsent.co.uk/boards/topics/se-50miles/



Hope everyone can make it, this munch just goes from strength to strength and is a genuine pleasure to organise!

gabrielle x


11/7/2010 11:56:36 AM

This evening, in Sir's absence i am to flog myself 30 times on each thigh whilst my nipples are clamped.  Master came over for a brief flying visit which was wonderful as i was not expecting to see Him this evening.  He says that as i have been a good girl i can use the softer flogger so i guess i'll just have to try to hit harder lol!


11/6/2010 8:18:44 AM

i find myself sinking back down into my slavery; it is a delicious descent and i am grateful to Master for encouraging me to return to my place.  Being in the throes of building work and being in charge has not helped my natural submissive character to shine...rather i have been bossy, argumentative, stroppy and generally contrary.

Lately, Master has been taking back control and i have found it a hugely overwhelmingly relief to be back in my place.  i was getting stressed beyond reasoning, i was not coping with the pressure of finishing this project.  Being back under His control has had a very calming affect on me, my stress levels have dropped and i am being generally nicer to folk (all good)

i love Him x


11/4/2010 6:44:11 AM

Things are looking up :-)


9/29/2010 6:35:41 AM
My new business www.wonkycircle.co.uk is now up and running!  Yippeee!

9/13/2010 11:50:39 AM
Wow, not been on here for a while lol!

7/9/2010 3:34:55 AM
Well last night was better than expected!  Roll on the next one!

7/8/2010 2:34:56 AM
Another Greenwich munch tonight.....not sure if i'm looking forward to it this time....

7/4/2010 7:20:37 AM

47 minutes... so so proud!

My little, beautiful, wonderful, fabulous and oh so loony seven year old daughter did the Race for Life this morning with me. It was hot, but she ran and walked with the rest of the 10,000 women and not only did she do it under an hour, but it was under 50 minutes too!

We sat on the grass during the minute's silence...i thought she was ok and knowing that, i was ok too, but then i felt her shoulders shaking and i realised she was in bits... We held eachother and cried together... When i could speak i told her i was so proud of her and that her Gran would be too.

Today is a day i will remember for the rest of my life; so emotional, so painful, but so, so, special.


6/26/2010 2:16:23 PM

Today i was sent away by Master for the day to be taught how to be a better slave...

He loves to have me massage His feet and for my birthday in October He bought me a one day reflexology course and today was the day!

To say i loved it is an understatement. i didn't realise just how complex and interesting it is. i now feel as though i would like to take it further and maybe, just maybe it could turn out to be something more than a hobby.

So, now i am a little more skillful and hopefully more useful and pleasing to Master. i am in a happy place right now! Oh and yes, He has already benefitted from my newly gained knowledge....*smiles*

Wonder if there would be any call for a kink friendly reflexolgist lol?


6/23/2010 3:59:10 AM
Engerland!
Engerland!
Engerland!

COME ON ENGLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'll keep my fingers crossed this afternoon....well, what more can i do?

6/21/2010 4:24:51 AM
i am very lucky that i have such a kind, caring Master.

i have been so busy this morning with so much done already.  Sir is asleep after His night shift, but He used me before He slept which was wonderful....:-)

The build is going really well and the walls are going up which is revealing the room for the first time.  Looks bigger than i anticipated which is always a good thing lol!

Life is just great at the moment!

6/19/2010 1:43:53 PM
Shit.  Completely without realising it, i have let Master down.  i feel so upset, i cried after He left....He is very angry but tried to reassure me it was going to be ok as He went out.  i hate that i have done this and i can't make it right.  i love Him so much and knowing He is disappointed and upset with me makes me feel sick.  i know He'll be busy at work tonight and i won't hear from Him, so i'll go to bed and try to sleep...bloody hell...

6/19/2010 4:16:58 AM
An early morning rape and caning.....Master is good to His slave.... i am happily back in my rightful place... :-)

6/17/2010 1:38:53 PM
It would appear that i am watching Big Brother....

5/31/2010 5:25:08 AM
i am honoured that this has been written about Uus; on a profile on another site...


"I recently saw a sub being transported to another place by a harsh and painful flogging. It was both moving and shocking and has prompted me to want to explore this further, slowly and with caution."


i hope Master and i will hear he has found a sub to go on this journey with him, and that Wwe'll see him again soon...

5/27/2010 3:11:17 AM
Cannot wait!  At long last the dates have come right and we are going to Anne and Roly's for the first time on Saturday - and it's the masked ball!  So many folk are going who Wwe know in person, but also who Wwe just know online so should be a great night.

5/19/2010 1:34:32 PM
Well i am so excited!  Master is going to allow me to have a pretty TS maid!  She is to be kept in chastity and will be allowed to wear a brand new CB6000 bought especially for her.  Strict rules will be expected to be adhered to, but there will be rewards.  i am looking foward to reading the responses to Master's advert on His profile!

5/13/2010 6:50:18 AM
Mostly now journalling on Informed Consent...

4/24/2010 6:14:55 AM
i have now felled, dug out and shredded the lilac...all on my own!  i am slave - hear me roar!!

4/24/2010 6:14:01 AM
i have had a really productive morning and i think it's because the sun is shining again.  Feel so much better when the weather is good and i stop doing all the silly procrastinating that i am oh so good at lol!

Master is working nights this weekend so i will not see Him now til Monday evening.  It means i have to find other things to fill my time with and He has asked me to start to take down the lilac at the end of the garden.  It is a shame, but it must go as Wwe are planning to have a kids club house thing in that corner.  So excited about it!

He is also going to build Uus a conservatory so with that in mind Wwe have been digging out another tree, but this one has a mind of it's own... To this end Wwe now have a chainsaw on order...

3/29/2010 8:10:16 AM
Ok, i have another HARD limit.  Please, if you want to talk to me, do not use text speak.  It is supremely lazy and utterly annoying. i realise that i could come across as an arrogant b***h for saying so, but really people, you can do better.


3/28/2010 1:10:11 AM
Master and i are off to Amsterdam on Thursday morning with some really good friends of Oours.  This should be a fabulously debauched few days and Wwe are so looking forward to it.  It will be such a treat to be able to get away from things for a while; planning permission, idiots who think they can ruin lives because they have been dumped etc etc Wwe have booked Oourselves a selfcatering place right in the heart of the red light district, a few doors down from the Casa Rosso so Wwe won't have to do much walking this time.  i will be wearing my collar from the minute Wwe get off the plane...utter bliss for five nights.... To say i can't wait, would be an understatement hehe!

3/23/2010 5:54:51 AM
Happy birthday to You
Happy birthday to You
Happy birthday wonderful Master....
Happy birthday to You!!! 

i love You Sir XXX

3/10/2010 4:25:38 AM

i have just received a rather lovely message from a male sub in America asking if i am really 38....as i don't even look 25 lol!!  Don't know how serious they were, but even so.....it has made me smile!


3/10/2010 1:58:57 AM
Munch tomorrow night and then a lovely Friday night play scheduled with friends.  No kids this weekend either so i'm feeling chirpy today lol!  Been for a morning run too so all is good!

3/8/2010 9:53:57 AM
What a lovely afternoon...... caned til i screamed, but Sir didn't stop....

Still feeling a little spaced and very smiley..........

ThankYou so much Master, thankYou for knowing how much Your slave needed that and for allowing her to have it.

XXX

3/8/2010 1:58:26 AM
Just been for another run....fourth since Wednesday last week.  Starting to become a habit again lol!

3/3/2010 1:30:55 AM
In bed last night i felt even closer to Master than ever.  He fell asleep with me holding His cock, His arms wrapped tight around me and Oour legs tangled up together... The feelings that washed over me were incredibly overwhelming, so cared for, loved, safe, protected, needed, cherished, wanted...i felt tears coming...so scared that something will happen to take this all away... i never want this to end...i have never been this happy; this is how my life was always supposed to be.  Over three years together and i have to keep pinching myself.... as Maria says in the Sound of Music; somewhere in my youth, or childhood...i must have done something good!

2/16/2010 1:32:13 AM
Last night it felt as though Master reached so deeply inside me that He touched my very soul...

2/11/2010 3:59:37 AM
Ok...i'll let you into a secret... i am completely unsure how the munch tonight is going to go.  This is a departure from the norm for Uus and i am keeping my fingers crossed that folk decide to come out and support it...  So far, all the regulars say they are coming, but Wwe need more really! 

Keeping my fingers crossed....

2/8/2010 8:46:19 AM
Oh how i wish i wasn't allergic to latex..... There are some quite delicious rubber outfits that i would simply adore to wear for Him....

Ah well....*shrugs*

2/7/2010 9:28:00 AM
i love Him, He is wonderful.  He makes me feel safe, loved, warm, content, challenged, horny, excited, loved and utterly utterly slave....

Can't wait til next weekend... The run up during this week will be fun i think, getting the house ready, making changes, planning how the spaces in the house will work, sorting things out.  i am very excited and hope all Oour lovely party goers will have a fab time!

Oh and the munch is on Thursday too lol!  It's going to be a great week! 

Love You Sir XXX

2/5/2010 6:45:48 AM
Sometime fate sends you something, or someone that helps to remind you just how fortunate you are.

i have made a wonderful new friend today.  She is the reason i wrote the above words.  She is braver than she thinks she is.  It turns out that she has wanted to talk to me for a long time, but thought i was scary...too together... i am glad that we finally have spoken and i am even more glad that she felt enough at ease with me to talk.  i could feel her unburdening while she spoke and it was a priveledge to listen to her.  The issues she faces are never going to go away, the mountain she has to climb is never ending.  The determination she has is incredible and i can see in her a strength she doesn't even know she has.


2/4/2010 3:49:48 AM
i love my Master....just lately wish i could see more of Him.... Still, it makes the times when i do see Him extra precious!

1/26/2010 2:25:27 PM
The world is starting to look brighter YEY!

1/26/2010 4:29:03 AM
i made an appointment with the Dr today.  i realise that i need to do something about my feelings that once a month threaten my very sanity.... Right now i am in bed, curtains drawn, hiding from the world, tears are not far away and there is a massive weight bearing down on me.  It is an effort to breath almost and my shoulders and upper back are aching.. i feel almost on the edge of a panic attack.  i suppose i have been naive.  i always thought pms made me angry, irritable, unpredictable, potentially violent maybe.  This is happening less and less and the depression has taken over the last few months.  Not sure what i prefer really... The past couple of days i have not had much sleep granted, but i can usually cope, but not today.  Today i feel like doing anything but coping.... But....making the appointment at the Dr's is a positive move, it has to be....afterall i am not going to let these stupid hormones beat me...that is Master's job.

1/24/2010 11:56:15 AM
Sir and i played quite hard last night. Unbeknown to me, He had decided to see how i would react to next to no warm up before He caned me...  He started with hard spanks on my arse and then inside of my thighs, a place where He knows i struggle ordinarily anyway.  This time was no exception but He resisted any feeble attempts on my part to ...

He hauled me to my feet, blindfolded me, gagged me, slung me forwards to the floor and knelt on me as He cuffed my wrists behind my back.

He picked me up, flung me forwards again and becoming disorientated, this time i found myself over the arm of the sofa.  i felt my ankles being bound to a spreaderbar and then the familiar noise of Him swishing a cane behind me... 

The cane He chose was a thicker, heavier, thuddier kind of cane than the whippy stingy one i love and again i was not given a warm up set.  He went straight into the beating.  The pain was huge, i had not has time to sink into my usual subby happy place and it was harder to deal with it.  i did cry though my gag, but i was not tied to where i was, yes i had a spreader bar, but it was not keeping me there.  What kept me there, was the sheer joy of feeling Master's power, the need to submit, the need for the pain...  After He had marked my arse and legs to His satisfaction, He told me i had had enough and took my ankles out of the spreader bar and turned me round so that my back was over the arm of the sofa and because my legs were open, i was extremely vulnerable... He attached clothes pegs to my pussy lips and i could feel myself at last sinking....He made me hold them so that i was completely open.....then.....

He put a clothes peg on my clit....

i safeworded.  It was red.  i was thoroughly ashamed.  i cried.

He helped me up, held me so close and loved me through my shame.  He made sure i knew He didn't think i was a failure and that helped me out the hole i was disappearing into.  He then allowed me to have some time under the table; Oour cage equlivalent til Wwe actually get one....  It helped and it was not long before i was feeling better.

The strangest thing was the fact that i felt that i slipped into subspace afterwards...when i was back sitting at His feet again...

Now, one night later and i am on my own...i find myself dropping into that horrible chasm of subdrop...He is not here tonight and i am not sure when i am seeing Him next.  i am desperately hoping He will text me and say something, anything really that will connect me to Him again... i hope He will understand that i need something.....  But then, He is Sir and i am slave.  He knows best and i trust Him.

1/20/2010 2:05:27 AM
Sir and i have been together for three years today!!  i love Him even more than ever!!

*happy sighs*

XXX

1/14/2010 8:01:17 AM
YEY!!!!!  Greenwich munch tonight!!!!!

1/13/2010 11:46:11 AM
Pure bliss being in the hands of my Master....

1/13/2010 5:12:49 AM
So excited, Wwe have 'Done and Busted' playing at the Feb munch!!  Thought it would be fun to have a band playing at the Valentine munch rather than do the whole hearts and flowers thang lol!

1/13/2010 1:48:22 AM
OK......where is it written that it HAS TO KEEP BLOODY SNOWING?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

1/12/2010 5:46:44 AM
Lately, i have been experiencing a renewed and slightly altered state of submission.  It is not clear where this has come from, but it is a tangible feeling, almost like diving into warm water.  i feel safe within it... It is as though, like a horse almost, i have stopped fighting Him for my head, realising anew that He is the Boss and my protector.  The comfort it gives me is boundless.  i want to lay in His lap, or at His feet, obey His simplest commands, or His most challenging order.  The simplest joy is in knowing that i am pleasing Him whether He is here or not.  Doing that chore that i have been putting off for ages, knowing that He will be proud of me...all the little things that i can do to make His life easier...

i am not a perfect slave, i never have been.  i am terribly insecure, moody, volatile at times.... But i do try and will continue to try to improve, as by striving to be the best person i can be i will therefore become the best slave i can be.  


1/8/2010 3:00:30 PM

He holds me near and whispers softly

I want you to listen, I want you to hear

I want you to know, what I want you to be

To give all that you can to me

 

Downwards now He sweeps it low

Offering me now my torment to kiss

As i feel my will begin to slip

i turn my face and kiss His whip

 

My arms are raised, the cuffs are tight

My slave, He whispers

We have all night......

I love you and you belong to me

Surrender now and I’ll set you free...

 

Leather clad hands stroke my skin

Shivers ripple down my spine

Breaths come quicker waiting and needing

He murmurs again now you are Mine

 

Breath for me slave

Then He says it again

I’m going to help you forget your name....


1/2/2010 5:25:06 AM

There is never anything good about breaking up with Someone you love.....but......and i say this with good authority....that making up can be a truly mindblowing experience...!!

i love my Master XXX




1/1/2010 1:14:13 AM
So this is what 2010 looks like.....where are all the flying cars, the hologram shopping channels, the weekend trips to Saturn?  Well sheesh, should have stayed in bed.... ;-)


12/31/2009 4:18:05 PM
i have just had a Skype conversation with my brother in Brisbane and my dad in Dorset.  Technology is indeed a wonderful thing. 

Happy new year to everyone i know and love x

12/31/2009 3:35:24 PM
The new year promises new beginnings and i am eternally grateful to have them...

i love my Master XXX

12/30/2009 9:10:09 AM
i have never known pain like this.  i can't breath, i can't eat.  The possibility that what has happened is real... the consequence... is too unbearable for me to contemplate. 

12/21/2009 12:24:15 PM
You know your Master loves you when....

He's on call at work in central London, but drops everything to come and rescue you and your kids who have become stranded in the car in the snow.

He tried so hard to get to us and almost made it, but had to give up in the end.  i did manage eventually to get myself and the kids back home after it thawed slightly.  To get to that point we had been sitting it out in the car for over an hour.  It was horribly icy and slippery but my idiotic German rear wheel drive eventually made it.

The biggest thing is that He would do that for me and my kids.  i felt so loved, so cared for and so guilty that i had caused Him to leave work, which He had to go back to....but also so amazing and i cannot stop smiling, knowing that Master loves me that much...

love You Sir from a-now-thawed-out slave xxx

12/2/2009 10:34:47 AM
Last night, after a very busy day working on the house rennovation Master put His puppy in the shower and washed her body and her hair Himself.  It was a special, wonderful moment and made her feel very, very loved and cared about.

ThankYou Master XXX

11/29/2009 10:01:04 AM
A = alive
B = bondage
C = chastity
D = devotion
E = excitement
F = fucking
G = gabrielle 
H = horny
I = insatiable
J = journey 
K = kneeling
L = longing
M = Master
N = No
O = orgasms
P = pleading
Q = quiet
R = restraints
S = submission
T = touching
U = uninhibited
V = violation
W = wonder
X = Xrated
Z = Zzzzzz........

11/21/2009 2:25:28 AM
Sir has had the week off and Wwe have played every day this week.....Master is now at work so Wwe physically cannot get at eachother....could be a good thing lol!  i just cannot get enough of Him.  i have never known anything like this, the connection, the closeness, the trust, the pleasure, pain, senations, sex.....  Yesterday, jaded and shattered from the previous night's session with another couple, Wwe still played and fucked all day between naps.....

Not for the first time......words are quite simply not enough Master, all i can say is i love You XXX

11/19/2009 1:07:08 AM
Happy sighs again today.....  Master and i found Oourselves in the dungeon again last night.  i bought some new rope yesterday and He wanted to try it out to go over what Wwe learned from Oour friend the night before.  It felt so good, beautiful rope work, Master got it just perfect.  He lead me to the whipping post and leant me there....me dropping all the time.  Then i felt hands guiding my wrists upwards and securing them to the cross bar....i knew He had something in mind.  He didn't blindfold me, there was no need....  He gently, because of the previous night's marks, whipped and caned me then He lit a match and i knew He was going to treat me to my favourite thing.....

The wax dripped slowly then quickly, i slipped further and further into space.....He drew on me with the lit candles....touching and stroking my skin with the lit wax...sending me spiralling deeper and deeper.... i have no idea how long Wwe played, just that it was beautiful, sensuous, beyond all sense of time and full of the most incredible feelings of love....thankYou Master....

i am at Your feet Sir, i love You XXX

11/18/2009 12:27:05 AM
Last night a rigger friend of Oours came over to fix the washing machine and ended up giving Uus a master class in rope bondage and then all three of Uus played in the dungeon.  Lots and lots of ouchy fun; paddles, canes, stress positions, wax, hitachi and i cannot move this morning without being reminded of how much i was spoilt by Sir (and both of them at times)!!

i just love rope!!!

*Master, at one point my behaviour was less than what You should be able to expect from me.  i apologised to You last night, but i am ashamed of how i reacted and i want to say sorry again here.*

i love You Master, i will improve my behaviour and i will also work on the issue You pointed out to me.

gabrielle XXX

11/7/2009 1:07:18 AM
Going over to the new house shortly to spend the day sorting out the front garden.  Will be taking stuff for the fridge, tea, mugs and the stereo!  When Wwe left to come back to the rented house yesterday, after picking up the keys, i didn't want to go.  i need to move in as soon as possible.....i know that there is wiring to do and walls to strip and carpet to come out and and and....but i really can't wait!

11/5/2009 10:25:37 AM
Last night Wwe went to a fantastic michelin starred restaurant for one of their famous gourmet events.......all i can say about it was that it was the most amazing culinary experience of my life and i will never, ever forget it.  It was my main birthday present from Master and it was more than worth the wait Wwe had for it.... Just as Master satisifies the deep need i have as slave to serve.... that restaurant satisfied my more decadent needs for mind blowing food lol!

Just as an aside...... Sir looked devilishly handsome in His black suit.... *swoons*

 

11/2/2009 8:50:46 AM
Last night Sir and i played on Oour own, a wonderfully intimate and loving session.  Lots of wax, stress positions, ropes, a little cane......and lots of magic wand action!  At one point Sir had to put His hand over my mouth to stifle the screams........  i think it was nine orgasms in a row...... When He unbound me i couldn't move and He had to help me onto the sofa in the dungeon for a coming down to earth cuddle. 

i wondered this morning if a certain part of my anatomy would still work today......thankfully Master proved to me that it did (twice...)

*happy sighs*

Totally and soppily in love slave XXX

10/25/2009 8:23:24 AM
Friday night..... party heaven.  Oour favourite people..... played til 5am.  Master broke me for the first time in a long while...it was intentional and very, very much needed....released something that was threatening to consume me.  Feel so free now, He has again proved that He knows me better than i know myself, that He owns me, controls me and that i never, ever want to be without Him.  Sitting here, alone, i can feel His influence, His presence....like a blanket round me.  i feel safe, loved, cherished....and i want to serve Him and make Him happy...proud of His slave all the more.

i love You Sir.... XXX

10/18/2009 1:26:37 PM
You know, the oddest thing.... Since i wrote my last journal entry.... i have started to feel lighter.... Getting feelings out, writing things down, for me, really really does help *smiles*

i feel the need to say thankYou Master, for allowing Your slave this freedom XXX

10/18/2009 1:01:16 PM
Sir and i have had another wonderful weekend full of debauchery and deliciousness ending in a fab Sunday lunch with some lovely friends (which Master cooked to perfection!)  Too much to go into, but it really feels like He and i are living the dream lol!  Sometimes i have to pinch myself and i realise that yes, this is me that this is happening to lol! 

i apologise now if anyone is actually bothering to read this....but this is my journal and there are a few things i need to ramble on about.  To try to get some clarity in my muddle slave mind....

Master and i are currently mentoring a new girl and Wwe played again with her on Saturday night for about 5 hours.  i freely admit that i do have issues with this, and mentally it is very challenging for me.   But, Master is being very patient with me and i am working hard to please Him and overcome any anxiety i have.  i know He loves me and i trust Him, but these are primevil , deeprooted feelings and sometimes they are overwhelming.  On the one hand i have really, really enjoyed Oour sessions together with this girl.....but on the other hand, my insecurites just refuse to go away.... i guess this is a natural reaction to another being introduced into a previously monogamous relationship, but i am struggling because of another reason too.  Master orders me to do things with other men.  Fairly recently i was milkmaid to four men at a time and i know He is currently planning to have me fucked by several men at once.  i have no issues with that, so why on earth should i have issues with what He does with her?  i am reasoning that it is because He has the choice, the power to make His own decisions, that He has thought about it and has the freedom of free will.  i am slave and therefore the theory is that i do not have that freedom.  Granted. i accept that.  i am slave and i love what i am, that is not the problem.  The problem is that i would not conciously make the decision to go and fuck someone else, of my own accord.  That would never even cross my mind.  i don't want anyone else, full stop.  If Sir orders it however, because it would please Him, then it is great, some of my fantasies involve scenarios like that.  i may struggle with parts of it, but then i am pleasing my Master and that is what i am doing it for, not just because i fancy fucking someone else. 

i am struggling with the whole thing of why the hell i have such an issue with Sir getting what He wants.  It is how it should be afterall.  He is my Master, He is the boss, i trust Him, He looks after me, He always makes sure i am alright.  Why am i making such a huge deal of this?  i know He loves me, why am i so insecure?  Why?  Is it because she is single perhaps?  Yes, that could be it.  i know that in her position, coming into this totally brand new, with someone in Sir's position (ok He is not actually God but....) it would be all too easy for her to form an attachment to Him that would be hard to break.  i know because it would happen to me, if i was in her position......it would be impossible not to.  To finally get what you want, from someone who can take you to places you never even knew you wanted to go.....a heady mix...

Do i trust her?  Yes.  Am i jealous of her?  i know i am...  But, if she had her own Master and Wwe all played together with Him, i know i would be more relaxed and would have the best time.  i think she is lovely, a fabulous person and a good friend; there is no bad bone in her body, but i am not poly....

i realise that i have areas that i need to work on, to please Master better.  i need to work on my jealous feelings, my insecurity, my selfishness, my lack of self esteem.  If i can do that, it will make me a better slave and more able to serve Him in the manner He should be able to expect from me.

10/13/2009 5:42:31 AM

Yesterday was my birthday and my play present from Sir was - a wonderful, romantic, challenging session begun with spanking and flogging and ending in over 1000 cane strokes with all Sir's many and varied canes.  My slave flesh is stripy red and purple and broken in places, feels beautifully tender and reminds me constantly of His touch and His love.

That was the culmination of a lovely day which started at midnight... 

i am honestly and truly blessed and my love for Him grows with each and every day.

ThankYou Master XXX


9/26/2009 11:18:24 AM
It has just crossed my mind about how anyone can possibly be vanilla.  i mean it is totally unnatural...isn't it?

9/22/2009 3:01:49 PM
My task was challenging.  Being naked, just heels, just collar...i felt so vulnerable in that huge garden.  Tottering down the steps into the deep dark, then trying to hide and run at the same time as the next door neighbour's intruder light came on and threatened to drown me in light!  i stayed in the corner for as long as i could, rustling in the hedge must have been a cat, but made me jump.  Then i felt calmer and started to think about why i was there and my Sir.  Felt quiet and still.  When i finally went back inside that light came on again and i had to run...

Going to bed now.  Master is pleased with me, so i am a happy slave x

9/22/2009 12:44:55 PM
Master has set me a task, or should i say test because it feels like that, tonight.  i am to wait til it is dark enough then walk to the end of the garden, naked wearing only high heels and my collar.  i am to stand in the corner and consider how best i can serve and please Him.

i am looking forward to this task, but am also apprehensive.  i am looking forward to it because i love being challenged by Him and i love having the chance to prove my submission to Him.  i am nervous about the possibility of being seen by the neighbours, but i have just looked out of the window and i really don't think that they will...

i will text Him when i am done.  i have not been given a time limit for how long i am to stay in the garden, but i have a feeling i will know when the time is right to come in.  It is simple; i will stay there until i have properly considered my slavery to Him, not until i get cold.

9/21/2009 3:08:55 AM
Am getting things done, but still want to hide under my duvet... Not depressed, just coming down *smiles* and feeling a little lost...  Master allowed me to sleep with His leather gloves last night as He is not here and that helped me to feel close to Him so that i could sleep.

9/20/2009 12:27:09 PM
i really, really miss Master.  i hate subdrop.  It's an effort to breath...

9/20/2009 9:30:57 AM
What a wonderful few days Wwe have had.  i am blissed out, but now that Master has left i am rapidly dropping...

Thursday was the munch and there was a great turn out with nearly 50 people!  Lots of new faces, but judging from the feedback i have had, they will be coming back.  It is really starting to feel properly established now and Master and i are really looking forward to November's especially as it will be the munch's first birthday.  Yes, Wwe are planning things for it.....lol!

Friday night was spent at Oour wonderful friends' house in rural Kent.  Wwe love playing with them and Sir put me through my paces with a fabulous blend of sterness and humour.  At one point He had me hogtied on the floor with my ponytail also roped up to the tie; preventing me from dropping my head.  He then dripped so much wax over me that my g-string actually stuck to me! 

On Saturday night Wwe went to RUB with a good friend of Oours.  On first glance the dungeon was a bit of a disappointment having been moved from the area Wwe last played in and seemingly smaller.  There was some play going on, but it was a little light and showy to my eyes.  However, i suppose the good thing about a club like this is that there are relatively few people who want to play like Wwe do and so when Wwe decided to have Oour first play Wwe didn't have to wait.  Master and Oour friend doubled dommed me; the first time that Wwe had done that properly.  It was a new experience to be paddled and flogged simultaneously and it was great!  i have to say that really he could have hit me harder, but it is difficult to know someone's levels when you have not played with them before so it was cool.  He later saw how hard Sir can hit me with the flogger and still had me begging for more.  i think had Sir had the cane last night and used it after the flogger, He may have had to break it before i had to stop.  It was one of those nights when He had me feeling invincible!  He knows me however and insisted on stopping when Wwe did.  i was allowed some spanking over His knee before Wwe went home however *smiles*  Combine that with giving Master a foot massage in the club and while sitting at His feet having my hands tied behind my back, then sleeping on the floor when Wwe got home, all in all a totally perfect and cathartic end to the weekend.

i love You Master more than i will ever be able to express in words. XXX

9/10/2009 1:15:38 PM
ooh ooh jumps up and down with excitement - just been offered $10million by a very kind Dom from Ghana!  Now just have to find my sort code and account number...............

8/24/2009 7:23:46 AM
Definition of bliss - the dungeon with Master.... tight immovable bondage, wax, ice, canes, floggers, pinwheel, humiliation, so much pain, delirium....confusion...pain...  At times this slave didn't know her own name, where she was, or how to answer her Master's simple questions. 

One thing is certain however, that Master's voice, stern orders and help made this slave take much more than she has ever been able to.

It may be a couple of days later, but the centred feeling and the bliss is still strong...

ThankYou Sir XXX

7/20/2009 1:52:00 PM
It would appear that i have swine flu.....oink....oink....sniff.....cough.....oink....ache.....

How they can diagnose these things over the phone is beyond me really, but everyone is told to ring up and not to go to the GP.  i am not in an at risk group, so no Tamiflu either.  Pity i cannot take time off work (full time single mother with two ums of 4 and 6 and the summer hols upon us) but there we go.

Master has been wonderful and came over to give His slave a hug and cook dinner for my two ums and put them to bed for me before going out.  Will be seeing Him again later on tomorrow afternoon and i can't wait.  Want to get better soon so that i can serve Him again like i need to.  However, this is not a severe case and i know i will be able to get back to normal soon.

All i want to do is sleep....

6/27/2009 2:41:12 PM
Who needs the gym when you have Glasto on tv and Pendulum's fantastic set?!?!?  i am totally out of breath and so happy!  Would have been great to be there, but at least i could dance like a loon whilst NOT wearing wellies lol!  Only shame of it all is that with ums upstairs asleep, i couldn't turn the tv up as loud as it soooo deserved!

Oh my God i am one danced out slave lol!!!

6/26/2009 2:36:07 PM

i went back to school today...  Master and i had so much fun today!  i dressed in my school uniform, went to lessons and tried my hardest at all the tests He had for me.  i didn't appreciate how hard my times tables would be and just how nervous being 'back at school' would make me.

School started with sitting at my desk infront of the blackboard.  Headmaster had me write my times tables 1, 5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 before break time.  If i took too long He caned me.  Then He had me stand at the front of class and with my eyes closed, recite my 1,  8 and 9 times tables with hesitation, or opening my eyes being punished.  Then, i had to sit and revise until the bell rang for break. 

At break time, i was allowed into the garden to use the skipping rope and to drink my milk and eat a snack.

i went back into class and then it was maths test time.  i was nervous and was suddenly unsure of myself.  When i had completed it i was tied to the wall by my wrists and Sir read out my results.  Each time i got a question right, i received a stroke of the cane.  Unbelieveably to me, i got all 10 questions right and each stroke of the cane felt like bliss!  While i was still tied to the wall, Headmaster gave this student her first orgasm, infront of the class.  It was an incredible, shuddering all consuming orgasm and i was almost shocked how powerful it was....

Then i was taught how to please Sir in His study....

This was so much fun, i can't wait to do it again!



This came on top of the news that i exchanged on my house sale today which is something else fantastic and apart from the news from America today it has been a perfect day...


6/20/2009 3:38:08 AM

The Power of Small Things

 

There have been a couple of things that have happened recently that have had a profound effect on this slave; the second one nearly had me saying something that i managed to swallow back before i did any major damage...  i will explain.

 

Last week i had a birthday card to post.  Being me, i didn’t get round to sending it straight away and left it on the side in the hallway til i could get to the shops to get a stamp.  i was busy doing something else when i realised i had not sent the card and went into the hallway to get it.  Sitting next to it, on its backing paper was a single first class stamp.  i knew who had left it there and why.  He is not one to do something for me when He knows it would better serve me to get me to do it myself.  i put the stamp on the envelope and posted it while on the school run.  i have of course said thankYou, but i don’t think He realises, or maybe He does, how much that ‘here’s the stamp, now get off your arse and post the thing’ meant to me.

 

The second thing happened last night.  i have had on my phone, a £1 tag from the Breast Cancer Awareness campaign that He gave me, which is a beautiful little sparkly heart.  A couple of days ago i noticed that the heart was missing off the end of it and because He had given it to me, i felt understandably sad and I told Him.  Last night, just before bed, i was cleaning my teeth and He disappeared downstairs.  i didn’t know why until He put a small package down on top of  the towel i was about to use.  He didn’t make a big deal of it; He just put it down.  It was a new little heart tag.  Something so incredibly thoughtful, so wonderfully unasked for, so unexpected and so simple gave me such a huge surge of love for this Man that i could hardly speak.  If there had ever been a moment in my life that i could have asked Him the question (and damn nearly did) it was then...!

 


6/17/2009 4:58:49 AM
Message received today -

"I would like to explore your body"  sent from a male switch in London who claims to only want to meet real people.  Odd then that my surprised and thanks, but no thanks reply should be met with "message not sent, user has blocked you"

Some folk really are strange.... *smiles*

6/6/2009 2:18:44 PM

ThankYou Master for this evening! 

Tonight i was put in awkward bondage, spanked, flogged, paddled and caned very hard.  Breasts flogged, soles of feet caned, forced to orgasm over and over again... i cried with the pain and release of it all..... Master asked if i wanted more...i said yes Sir...and He gave it to me...

i feel so light and free....Master said it is getting easier to push me harder and harder, that i can now take everything He can give me and that although i am in so much pain, i am now going beyond the level i have been at previously and i am loving it even more because of it.  i didn't fly tonight, simply because He did not allow me to.  i was aware of everything, i was present the whole time.  The sensations, the pain, the emotions, all a beautiful, wonderful crystal clear blur...(if you have been there you will understand that description)  i am so grateful and so happy, so  calm and so in love.  It defies words really, nothing i can really say here can describe the way i feel. 

i am slave, i am whole, i am His.


5/30/2009 2:23:47 AM
i now know what 1000 (yes one thousand) lashes from a cane feels like.....

*dreamy, floaty, happy, smiley*

5/4/2009 7:55:09 AM
After a few stressful days Sir and i have scheduled in playtime tonight and i CAN'T wait!  Wwe will both be tired but i cannot think of a better way to destress than to immerse Oourselves in Eeachother and what Wwe love doing. 

Who knows, by the end of the year if the houses move goes according to plan, Wwe'll have Oour own purpose built dungeon... Keeping fingers crossed...

4/29/2009 12:49:36 PM
i just keep falling deeper and deeper in love with Master...

4/8/2009 2:42:37 AM
The power of dreams has always been something i have been aware of, but this morning it all became even more apparent.

Sir and i have been so busy lately and Wwe have not been able to play as Wwe would like to.  As a consequence, i have felt aspects of my submission slipping a little.  i have become more of a handful, lippy, answering back without thinking etc. 

Master has been planting seeds in my head when Wwe are alone, when He uses me; telling me delicious things that He wants to do to me, which always works to get me off *grins*  Sometimes, dreams can be more powerful and more vivid when they come after being asleep for a long time.  i fell back to sleep this morning after waking briefly, fetching something for Him and getting back into bed.  The dream that came was intense, powerful and very, very real.  In it, Wwe played out the scene He has planned for one of the next times Wwe play.  My head embellished it with backgrounds, scenery and other things, to make it an amazing fantastical, vivid dream.  i won't go into details here, but i will say that when i came downstairs just now, i was deeply into subspace still and totally and utterly contented...  Without even knowing it, Sir has put me back into my slave head and he didn't have to raise His whip arm once!

Not that i am saying i don't need beatings anymore....*smiles and wags tail*

i am smiling happily, Sir is still asleep, i wonder what He will make of it when i tell Him...?  

2/24/2009 2:32:52 PM
Oh what a fabulous weekend Wwe have just had.  Friday night was spent in the company of a good friend and rubber sub.  A very painful and interesting time was had by both him and myself in the hands of my Master!!!  i have discovered that i like straightjackets lol!  As Wwe stayed overnight Wwe could play and talk as relax and it was about 2.30am that Wwe all finished for the night.

Saturday night was spent at Club Rub.  Wwe met up with a few of Oour friends from the munch and had a great time.  As Rub is more of a dance and socialising type of fetish club, the dungeon was not in much demand to begin with and Sir and i could play and play!  In between times, Wwe watched a couple of other serious players, which was beautiful.  i love seeing others play, when there is an obvious understanding between Top and bottom and not just a bit of slap and tickle lol!  It turned out that one couple Wwe had been watching and admiring were infact folk i had previously known of on LFS!  How wonderful to be able to meet them finally in real life!  Wwe had a lovely night and even had Oour photos taken, but it seemed to finish all too soon...well it was 4am.  Trouble is that i got a little tipsy towards the end and when i was putting my nilla togs back on, a footslave who had been making more than a little nuisance of himself with the Mistresses, turned his attention to me!  Well, being half drunk i of course turned switch and much to my Master's resigned amusement, encouraged this behaviour, actually pointing my booted toes at him so he could lick the soles.....arghhh the shame of it!  Moral of the story is....well i dunno, but i am sure there is one!  It took an age to get back home, but when Wwe eventually did at 5.30am Sir decided to make the best fried egg sarnies the world, no, the universe has EVER seen!!  Have i mentioned how much i love and adore Him?  No?  Well i do, heaps and heaps!

Wwe spent most of Sunday asleep and recovering waiting for my Ums to come back from seeing their father. 

Going up to bed now.  Think i will wear His Tshirt...makes me feel like He is nearer....hate being away from Him even though i know He has to work.  i know, i know, greedy slave!

2/19/2009 2:17:58 AM
So much stuff has been happening lately.  Wwe have played with another couple who Wwe met through CM.  They are lovely people, but i found some things pysychologically difficult to deal with.  i had to stop mid scene, but instead of punishing me, Sir was understanding, gentle, kind and supportive.  Wwe have talked several times about what went wrong and i have arrived at a point where i have agreed that i will face this again perhaps in a slightly different way, but not just yet.  i think this is a matter of my submission mixed with what seems to be a hard limit.  This means for me that as i am a slave, i must try to break down this barrier so that i can offer Him pure submission as opposed to something that falls short of what He should be able to expect.  This limit, i feel is not something that i will ever be able to get rid of, but my obedience should be total.  It means that even if He never asks me to do it again, He knows that i would obey should He want me to.

The night before last was spent in HeadMaster's study in detention.  i was blissfully in trouble with the Head and it was deliciously humiliating and ouchie!  As well as the cane Sir used the electrical thingy on various bits of me which had the interesting effect of making me want to use the toilet...

When Wwe went to bed that night, i was a puppy and tied to the end of the bed by my ankle and in wrist cuffs.  i lay on the floor by Sir's side of the bed and, curled up in my puppy blanket, fell asleep.  i was woken shortly afterwards by Master telling me to get into bed so that He could use me...

All the next day (yesterday) until 5pm, i was a puppy.  Not allowed on furniture, only allowed to talk in Wuffs and whimpers, naked apart from my collar and having to eat and drink from bowls on the floor.  Nothing to do but lie at Master's feet, doze, wander around and be Sir's faithful non thinking companion.  At one point i trotted over to Him with His leather gloves in my mouth, wagged my tail and looked hopeful.  i was put over His knee and given the most wonderful spanking...i think the best one i have ever had; softly and sensuously built up to two perfectly painful peaks of such intensity that i actually came!  i fell asleep on His lap.  Being in puppyspace was like taking a holiday from my brain.  It meant that for the first time in as long as i can remember, my brain was silenced; the ceaseless flow of thought, worry, planning, responsibility, living etc was stopped.  Powerful.

i love You Master, thankYou for everything xxx

2/1/2009 1:52:17 PM
Yesterday...  What an amazing afternoon!  Sir and i were invited to the gorgeous home of a Domme/sub couple who Wwe met at the munch Wwe run.

i have never played with another couple before, let alone one with a female Domme and a male sub.  Master had spent the previous few days talking with Mistress via emails and texts and i had been talking with her sub in the same way, so Wwe had done lots of groundwork in preparation.

i would love to be able to write here what happened.  But i am unable to.  Not because i don't remember, nor because anything bad happened.  It is simply because i was so overloaded with play over the four hours that it is still a lovely, delicious blur lol! 

Do you know how it is when you have been completely overwhelmed with everything you could ever imagine?  Something you have been longing to happen to you finally does and it is better than you ever thought it would be?  All your Christmasses and birthdays rolled into one.  Remember when you were a little kid and something so amazing happened you just could not take it all in?  Sensations... depths of submission beyond anything previously known... Total immersion in who you really are; knowing completely that this is who you were born to be, what you were born to be.  No other responsibility other than to be what you are...slave.  The phrase "living the dream..."  Never wanting to wake...

Used by my Master, beaten, bruised, humiliated and challenged by Master.  Hearing Mistress and Her sub...  Then Mistress beating me, with Sir... Sir humiliating me and inviting Her to do the same.  Both taking me through and passed what i had thought was a limit for me, but in a way that i could cope with, changing my perceptions, altering my way of thinking...

i am changed, made better, improved.  A continuous process of alterations, in order to serve my One in any way He wishes.  i am stronger, more alive, more gabrielle than ever.  She lives and breathes her slavery; her servitude to her Master.  She yearns to hear an order, to receive a task, to know she has pleased Him.  To sit at His feet, to expect nothing, but to hope for approval...to hear Him say "Good girl gabrielle"  To make Him happy...


1/20/2009 5:25:29 AM
Today is the second anniversary of me becoming Sir's slave!  Feeling so happy and proud of how far i have come under His guidance.  i love Him more and more each day; the patience He has, the love He gives me and the control and dominance He has over me makes me feel so happy and fulfilled.  i have never loved anyone as much, or in the same way as this, or trusted anyone else this much....i am overwhelmed...

i am on my knees Sir

Your slave gabrielle x

1/9/2009 5:19:43 AM
Master and i explored my newly found love of silence last night.  He tied my hands to the restraint above the door and was going to blindfold me, but couldn't put His hands on it.  Wwe have not played without a blindfold since He was gently introducing me to the scene two years ago.  i was free therefore to watch, or close my eyes and i found this absolutely wonderful! 

He ordered me to silence before He began warming me up with what felt like a paddle (i had my eyes closed) and as last time i made a concious effort to relax and experience everything; to remind myself that i am to welcome in every sensation, not try to just get through what He was doing, but to really be in it.  It didn't take long to get into this headspace, i dived right in.  He didn't let me just slip into subspace however; He kept bringing me back and letting me go deeper, then bringing me back.  He started with the flogger, wonderful rythmical strokes, some hard some soft.  Hypnotic and again, in silence.  Every now and again He murmered something, but i was completely under and i have no idea what He said...just that His voice was adding to my bliss.  When i looked down i could see Him swinging the flogger and in the breaks between strikes He stroked my body with His gloved hands and sent me spiralling down again.

Then i could hear the swish of the cane behind me as He tested it in the air next to me.  i was excited, anxiously waiting for the first time it hit my skin.  He told me something that did register in my flying mind; 100.  i knew this would challenge me, but i wanted it so badly.  The strikes came in groups of ten and He kept count for me, telling me each time another 10 had been administered.  The pain was explosive, beautifully liquid and intense.  He had warmed me up to perfection with the paddle and flogger and now my mind and body was free to accept and absorb and swim and become immersed in sensation.  Every now and again a stroke landed that almost woke me and i started to rise towards the surface, but then He sent me back again, so that i sank back into total bliss.  He stopped at 80 strokes and told me that i had 20 left and did i want them.  All i could do was nod and i meant it from the bottom of my heart; this was not just something i wanted; i needed it.  The final 20 were delivered in close succession with no break, the pain built, grew and threatened to overwhelm me, but i was still silent and taking all He could give me inside myself.  When He had given me all 100 strokes of the cane, He felt again, between my legs to see how His slave was responding...i was almost dripping.  He took me to a wonderful orgasm while i was still tied and still following orders, i made no sound when i came...

Intense, powerful, mindblowing and incredible.  The way Oour play is developing just takes my breath away and Master is orchestrating it all with such thought and skill.  i have never felt so close to Him as last night; to me it seemed that there was no place where He ended and i began, Wwe were just one...

The word "love" is just not enough; i am still floating...ThankYou Master. XXX

1/8/2009 5:28:02 AM
Hmmm, an interesting discovery.  i have found that when Master and i indulge in any lengthy period of puppy play that i can only respond to Him with whimpers and wuffs; it takes actually physical effort to use any form of words.  Also that kissing on the lips feels odd, strangely wrong...  Him taking me doggy style was however, amazingly and wonderfully right lol!

This puppy is still wagging her tail from last night...


12/15/2008 4:05:54 AM
i spent the whole of the night on Saturday in my collar and tethered by both ankles to the bed.  i was allowed to sleep in the bed and Sir used me while i was tied.  It made me so happy, completely peaceful and totally content.  To be honest i had the best night's sleep i have had for a long while *grins*

i have begged to be allowed to be tethered when He is not here also, but very sensibly He has said no.  i guess i just don't know what's good for me sometimes...thankfully i have a Master who does!

See You when You return Sir, i love You! xxx

12/9/2008 1:24:40 PM
Sat on a cold, hard, wooden chair, ripples of anticipation are running over my skin and through my body as the blindfold is put on.  i am allowed to adjust it, scratch my nose, get comfortable; i am told that is the last i will be able to do so.  Wrists bound in cuffs linked with a chain are slightly scratchy with the hardness of new leather, they are holding my hands behind the back of the chair, forcing my back onto the cold wood.  i breathe in sharply, involuntarily at the sudden coldness.  This is going to be something special i think to myself.  Everything that is about to happen i am going to love, even though i don't exactly what it is, i know i am going to love it.

i feel the ropes then, deliciously starting to be wrapped round my naked flesh.  i can feel His strong arms and big hands pulling, adjusting, getting it right.  The rope binds me firmly to the chair and the more it goes on the less and less i can move.  i am in heaven.  My upper body is totally immobile and then i feel Him take hold of my left ankle, tying to the corresponding chair leg, it feels as though it is not the one infront, but the one behind.  My other ankle is tied in the same way.  The ropes are pulling my legs open and, as though to emphasise this, i feel more rope around my thighs; i cannot even thing about closing my legs now.

Deeper i am falling into subspace, that floating, sensual feeling that is delicious and perfect.  Thwack!  The first stroke of the flogger wakes me from my dreamworld suddenly.  Several more blows come down on the fronts of my thighs.  i hate the flogger on the fronts of my thighs though don't i?  Don't i?  Apparently not in this situation.  The pain is welcome, i need it and love it.  The fact that i cannot move at all, makes it something i just have to accept and sink into.  i was not expecting it, but oh it is wonderful.  Being forced to take pain like that is to be forced to accept it, with all free will taken from you.  Powerful and liberating.

He stops and i raise my unseeing eyes to His, He kisses me and then slaps my face several times. 

He decides that to make me look prettier, He needs to decorate my face and body. Not content with the nipples clamps as they don't look quite right, He instead attaches clothespegs to my nose, mouth, nipples, torso, and inner and outer pussy lips.  The pain is beautifully bearable, but is building in the inner lips.  He gently removes the ones on my nose and mouth.  He slaps the sides of my breasts and flogs me a little before removing the other pegs.  He does not do this gently, but viciously yanks on them, pulling them off so that they seem to bite through me with very sharp teeth.  Knowing i must not make a noise, He watches in amusement as i try to deal with what He is doing without yelling.  When He pulls of the pegs on my pussy i almost fail.  He laughs.  Then, He puts a clothespeg on my clit.  i am in pain, but it is ok.  Then, He pulls on it a little, making me believe for a moment that He intends to pull this one off just as viciously.  He slackens His hold on it and i breath an inward sigh of relief.  But too soon!  He does pull this one straight off too and the pain is so exquisitely focussed, that all i can do is scream soundlessly at the ceiling.

i feel His tongue between my legs and the pain i am in intensifies my already burning desire for Him.  i am desperate to cum, so much so that it hardly takes any effort on His part at all before i am exploding in His mouth.

The next few moments after that are a blur of being forced to orgasm several more times with a vibrator and more beating.  i beg for Him to take the vibrator away from my clit, and He announces He is bored.  He drags me backwards, still tied to the chair into a small, very dark room, covers me with a blanket and leaves.  i hear Him moving out of the room, across the landing and down the stairs.  It is very quiet in here, all i can hear is my own breathing coming in small gasps as i calm down from all the pleasure and the adrenalin.

When He comes back he pulls the chair back into the bedroom.  The vibrator is being put back into my still hungry pussy and when it is switched on i moan in absolute pleasure.  He takes me to another orgasm then unties my ankles so that i can stretch my legs, He takes off the blindfold and the light is overwhelming and i keep my eyes closed.  All the while He is using the vibrator on me, more gently this time, massaging my body and orchestrating my whole being to the most wonderful, non forced orgasm, the final one of the evening on the chair.  i feel radiant, wonderful, amazing, humbled by gratitude and intensely alive.

That was last night.  My Master has given me another wonderful present, something He knew i would love from start to finish; a selfless act of love for His slave.  There is nothing i love more in this lifestyle than to feel the complete helplessness of being bound by rope.  To be completely and utterly at His mercy, to be forced to simply accept.  Words to describe how i feel towards Him are failing me right now.  Know simply this, that i love Him beyond all forms of expression that i can give here.

gabrielle

12/7/2008 2:11:54 PM
Oh dear, longer than i thought...

It is difficult to put into words the deep longing and intensity of the craving that i have for Master and what He and i do together.  When He is not here, from the minute He closes the door behind Him it starts.  The feeling begins quietly, an unsettling shift in my balance, as though the power that has been calming me has been removed and my need to have it restored is starting to cry out.  If left for too long this quiet beginning, turns into a deafening roar...  Master's tasks and instructions to me while He is not here, keep the roar to a minimum and managable.

Lately Sir has left off the domination training and has been restablishing my submission.  This has felt so comforting, like coming back home and climbing into your own bed after an interesting time away...  He guides me through the ways that He wants me to develop, but always ensures that the slave underneath it all is nutured and fed, for this person is the real me; the one who loves Him and begs to always be at His side.

Tonight i begged Him to hurt me, i felt an inner need so strong it was impossible to still and i had to ask His indulgence.  When He put me over His knee, to warm me up i felt relief and ready for His hand.  He uses a leather glove, which means He can spank for longer and much harder than normal.  i love it.  The immediacy of His touch, combined with the closeness of His body and power behind each hand landing on my flesh really turns me on and tonight was no exception.  i asked for permission as i felt the orgasm building and to my gratitude He allowed it.

He decided that i was in need of more sensation, so He ordered me, in the form of asking me, to get ready for the cane.  i was immediately on the defensive, as i am still not hugely confident when it comes to these things inspite of the other day.  However, Master knows best and i presented on all fours on the bed, pillow crammed into my mouth.  The first few strokes were awful, i admit.  i felt anti cane, not going with it at all, needing to run.  i kept moving and curling up, but He ordered me to get ready again.  The pain was enourmous, but gradually as He continued, with breaks, i felt the pain turning from stinging impact to wider sheet, if that makes sense.  i was accepting it, welcoming it and actually enjoying it.  He stopped and asked me if i had had enough and i said yes.  Oddly, although my mouth had said yes, i had in fact meant no...  He gave me 10 seconds to get back into position otherwise the next twenty would turn into thirty.  Helpfully He knelt on the backs of my ankles, so that i could not move them.  He gave me twentyfive strokes, i counted them in my head.  My arse was on fire, but still i had not had enough, although i told Him i had.  He must have known that, because He gave me ten more to finish with, His knee still on my ankles.  The last stroke of each set He gives me is harder than all the others and is therefore harder to take.  This set was no exception, but even though the pain was huge, it was not horrible and the release from negative energy was massive.  i don't know how many cane strokes i received in total, but i do know that my arse is a lovely criss cross pattern of lines and blood.  i asked Him to take a photo for me!  i am sitting here, writing this up and feeling all warm and fuzzy, emotionally as well as from my arse lol!  

i truly got what i needed tonight from my Master.  i know some folk don't think that slaves should be allowed to ask for anything that they want, but Sir is not a brain dead inhuman idiot.  My Master is the most wonderful Man on the planet (imo).  He who looks after His slave, will surely be looked after by that slave tenfold over.  i believe that a slave and her Master are two parts of one whole; the slave cannot serve without the Master,  the Master cannot rule without the slave.  Yin and Yang.  i want, need and crave to serve and love my One.  The universe has brought Uus together, Oour destinies are now intertwined.

i feel lighter, happier, calmer and more centred.  Sir has had to leave, but although i am feeling that all too familiar drop, i know i can handle it better tonight because every time i move i feel the touch of His hand and the stroke of the cane on my body.  i feel huge emotional pain when He is not here, not just missing the touch of Him, but the sheer inability to serve Him.  The waiting now begins again, to see Him again or to get a message instruction.  Anyone who has read Submission by Marthe Blau will recognise these feelings, although i hasten to add that my Master does not use me in quite the same way!

i love You Sir, thankYou again, see You soon.

slave xxx

12/3/2008 2:55:32 AM
Warning - another long one!

Last night i became a schoolgirl.  My age was alot younger than the TOS would allow, so i am not going to say what i was.  Everything was pre arranged and agreed, i just didn't know how much it would affect my head!

It began with me in my schoolgirl outfit, kneeling by Sir's feet.  He had already had me drink a pint of water.  Then He had me drink almost another 2 pints.  i was allowed to have juice in it, but i was made to drink it.  i was on a school trip, on a coach with no toilet facilities...i was desperate to go.  Eventually, my teacher told me that we were stopping for a rest stop.  However, there were no toilets at the place we stopped at.  Teacher told me that the only place available was an old bath in the field.  He took me over to it (in the bathroom) and told me to get in.  i had to raise my skirt, but was not permitted to remove my knickers.  i was ordered to pee, in the bath, infront of my teacher.  Teacher was angry with me for wetting my knickers and i was told that i would be seeing the HeadMaster when we got back to school...

i was washed down, given a towel to wrap round me and ordered into His office to stand in the corner and wait for His arrival.  While i was waiting, head bowed in the corner, i completely dropped into what Wwe were doing.  i was actually that age, i was terrifed of the trouble i was in and more than a little scared of anyone finding out what i had done.

HeadMaster came into the room and asked me what i had been sent to Him for.  i had to tell the truth; i was sure He had already been told.  He was very angry with me and ordered me over to stand infront of Him.  He told me to show Him what i had done.  i had to remove the towel and He felt my knickers.  i couldn't look at Him, the shame was real.  He felt inside my knickers too and i thought how wrong that was.  He told me that bad girls get spanked and that i had been particularly naughty.  He bent me over His lap and spanked me hard, knickers still on with His leather gloves on.  That was nice on one level, but i was so young and scared...  Then He stood me up and showed me what i had done to His trousers.  i had wet them.  i was horrified and apologised alot.  He told me i would have to take them off...His underpants were also wet and i had to take them off too.  He told me that His thing was wet too.  i was made to lick it clean.  It was twitching and changing, getting bigger and i was shocked and alarmed, but was ordered to keep going until He was happy it was clean. 

He then told me that i was to be punished further for what i had done.  He took me into His office, ordered to stand in the corner and He put ankle cuffs on me before telling me to put wrists cuffs on.  He left the room and although i have done this countless times before, the headspace i was in at that point meant that the person i was didn't know how to put them on and i struggled, but managed it in the end.  He came back in and threaded rope through the wrist cuffs, pulled them over the table so that i was stretched over the table length ways.  All the time i was thinking, this is wrong, HeadMaster should not be doing this, but i have to do as i am told i am in so much trouble for wetting myself.  He was talking about how bad i had been, but i was not to see anything, or tell anyone.  He blindfolded me then tied my ankles apart to the table legs.

i knew what was coming and i was frightened.  i had seen the cane.  When it hit my skin i cried out instantly, the pain was bad.  It hit me again and again five more times.  HeadMaster stroked my burning arse almost tenderly, but i think He was admiring His marks.  i was crying already, the pain too much for me, but i didn't safeword, they didn't exist in this place.  He gave me another six and i was sobbing and saying i hated the cane, hated the cane.  He asked me if i was ready for more and i was shaking and saying no, but He gave me a moment before asking again.  i shook my head then said yes, i was ready, well i would try.  i braced myself for the next set of caning, but instead felt hot, moulten wax thrown over my back and arse.  Instantly i stopped shaking, totally relaxed and sank into subspace.  When He did cane me again it felt totally different, wonderful and delicious.  Just the last stroke from each six came near to hurting.  In between the caning HeadMaster parted my arse cheeks and entered me.  i should have been protesting, i was so young, He should not be doing this.  But i was worried that i would get into more trouble if i did so i remained quiet.  He caned me again, then entered me again.  i became aware that He was talking again.  Offering me the chance to end the suffering, but He didn't think i would be capable of doing it, only the older girls were any good at it. i begged to be allowed to try...

HeadMaster took me to His bedchamber and ordered me to strip then get into bed beside Him.  He held me to calm me for a moment, then ordered me to pleasure Him orally.  In the headspace i was in, it took me a few minutes to get into what i needed to do, then instinct took over.  He gave this young girl her very first orgasm midway and it was suprising but very nice.  i fullfilled Him soon after that and while He was holding me, He ended the scene.

Wwe held eachother close and talked and kissed for a long time afterwards.  i was still a young schoolgirl and He gently and patiently helped me surface from that role, without taking me out of wonderful, floaty, dreamy subspace.

The pain that a cane brings is not something i am any good at and this scene was put together to help me to get through this, so that i can enjoy it when He wants to give it to me. Today i am still blissfully happy and so grateful to Him and the thought He put into the scene.  i am going to get Him an academic's gown and mortar board for the next time Wwe do teacher/schoolgirl...

12/2/2008 4:35:06 AM
Tonight i am to be caned.  Master and i have planned a school girl/Head Master scene and i am really excited, but a little scared.  There are things going on in my life that could well involve solicitors and even court (fingers crossed it does not get that far) and that is occupying much of my mind today.  For that reason, i am hoping that He will ease me into this gently at first, to get my head where it should be so that He can get the best out of me.  i want to do my best for Him; He deserves nothing less, but i may need a little extra help getting out of fight mode and into bottomspace tonight...

11/25/2008 6:56:28 AM
After three days of Him playing with His toy and not allowing it to orgasm, Master finally allowed me release last night!  He saw what complete tease and denial was doing to me (sending me slowly insane) and decided that it would be better to allow me to cum for my own health and mental wellbeing!  i have utmost respect for Him, He allowed this a day earlier than He had planned.  He looks after me totally, i am here to serve Him and pleasure Him, but the love He shows me and the compassion He has for His property is humbling.  i will work harder for Him, to make sure His pity does not go unrecognised.  i never want to come up from my knees.

i love You Sir, you guide me, care for me, shield me, protect me, push me, train me, hurt me and challenge me.  i could never ask for more.  You are my One, my soulmate, lover and Master.

11/20/2008 1:50:22 PM
i have reached another milestone in my Master's training; to be fucked without coming...  i am a very, very highly sexed slave and when Sir fucks me i cum easily.  (This has not always been the case ie when i was married lol!).

Since He took control of my orgasms, He has used this power to trigger my climaxes to great effect.  He makes me wait, making me hold my orgasm until He grants permission and releases me into it.  However, He has decided that He gets more personal pleasure and therefore enjoys His toy better, if i am not allowed to cum before Him.

Training my mind to disengage from Him and what He is doing, whilst also making sure He is not fucking an inanimate object has been a difficult thing.  i have however managed it and i am pleased that now He can truly use His slave as a toy with three holes to choose from.  His pleasure is paramount and the only thing that ultimately matters.  If i am then allowed an orgasm after He is done i am a very happy slave lol! 

11/17/2008 3:51:34 AM
Oh my goodness the past few days have been a whirlwind of socialising, debauchery and sensory overload!

To start with it was the inaugral Greenwich Munch last Thursday.  Thankyou so much to everyone who came.  What can i say?  It was amazing, with over 50 people in total.  i think at one point there were over 40 people in the room.  i had wondered if Wwe had booked too large a room at one point, but i needn't have worried.  Everyone who came was lovely and a fab night was had by all.  i have to say that yes, i did get a little tipsy, but then so did a heap of other folk lol!  Cannot wait til the next one on 11th December!!!

Then, Friday night was a fab threesome with a newbie, who performed brilliantly!  i am being trained as a Domme by my Master and this male sub was a training excercise.  Being someone i already know from talking to online for about a year and having met up at the munch the night before, i was fairly confident he would be ok.  He came up to expectation and the evening was very satisfactory for all concerned lol!

Saturday morning saw Master and i shopping in Camden for all things pervy and gothic before having lunch and going off to another threesome.  This time was different as Wwe were playing with a lovely Tgirl who Master and i have been talking to online for a while.  This was something neither of Uus had done before, but she was a very gracious and welcoming hostess and Wwe all had a very fun time.  She and i took it in turns to go over Sir's knee then be whipped.  It was only fair that we should then show Sir how grateful we were to Him... i know He enjoyed Himself!

Then on Saturday night Master and i were at a rock concert - Bullet for my Valentine at Alexandra Palace!  What a night, right on the edge of the mosh pit, so much so that Sir had to protect me from being dragged in!

Sunday was lying in bed with Master, being so totally into eachother that Wwe didn't get up til lunchtime.  Then Sir made Uus bacon sarnies and Wwe went to Tate Modern to see the Rothko exhibition.  A truly awesome and intense vision of staggeringly powerful paintings that left Uus feeling a little emotional.  i think after the experiences of the previous couple of days, seeing Rothko like that would have had that effect on anyone lol!

i am having issues with the vanilla world and don't want to come back into it lol!  However, i know i owe it to my kids (who were away with their father this weekend) to come back down to earth a little...

11/9/2008 1:49:12 PM
Dinner

Master laid the table with candles and silverware.  i brought His dinner to Him, naked.  He lay me on the heavy wooden table and He bound my wrists and ankles to it so that i could not move; lit candles were on either side of my head.

The plate was hot and hurt as He placed in on my bare skin, i tried to stifle a cry of pain.  Dinner did not stay on the plate and i felt hot food on my stomach and breasts, cheeks and between my legs.  He took some and pushed it deep into my pussy, more and more.  The pain was passing and the pleasure was taking over.  He had never used me like this before.  The plate was taken away and more food placed on my skin.  Then He started to eat.

The feeling of the knife against my flesh was almost too much, the cerated edge of the knife feeling so much more close to cutting me than i am sure it was.  He used the knife and fork to torment my nipples, the pain there very, very real and for the first time i involuntarily tried to pull away; the chains binding my wrists stopping me...

 

11/2/2008 9:54:43 AM
The other day was wonderful, but challenging (in the way that it is supposed to be).  Master said He was going to give me some money towards housekeeping; £100 to be exact.  i asked Him what i had to do to get it, jokingly...  He told me that i would receive a lash from the flogger for each and every pound.  He tied my hands above my head and leaned me against the wall, ankles also tied.  He then warmed me up with a few more gentle strokes, before He started with the 100...  i love being flogged, but this was the longest, hardest and most difficult to endure flogging i have ever had.  i counted with each stroke, and He stopped after each 10 or 15 or so...  He told me that He was going to break me, to get me to safeword...  That made me think that He was right, i couldn't handle the relentless pain.  But then, after 30 and i hadn't broken, He changed and whispered in my ear that i could take it and He knew i could... Well that made me feel stronger, wanted desperately to please Him, to work harder at taking it.  He was hitting me very, very hard, it was so painful, but at the same time beautiful.  He stopped to check me every now and again, i wanted it to stop, but carry on all at the same time.  The pain was immense, so much that i was not sure i could carry on and i lost count of the strokes of the flogger, the blows rained down onto my back, legs, inside of my thighs and arse.  He checked me again then hit me the hardest He has ever done, the falls whipped round and stang the front of my legs.  My legs buckled and i sank under the blow, my hands hanging from the cuffs, body shaking all over.  i tried to regulate my breathing.  i could not take anymore like that one...  His voice breathed in my ear "Nine more like that" and i knew i was broken.... i safeworded and burst into tears.  He undid my cuffs and my legs just collapsed under me as He gently lowered me onto the floor and held me.  i felt defeated and ashamed.  He just told me over and over how proud He was of me, how strong i had been, how amazed He was by me and how much He loved me and my shame turned into pure happiness.  i had taken 91 of the hardest flogger strokes He had ever given me; i was battered, bruised and bleeding, but life was perfect.

ThankYou Sir for constantly challenging me and finding new ways to deepen and cement my submission to You.

10/25/2008 9:37:21 AM
Please see Sir's latest diary entry and updated profile...

10/21/2008 4:37:25 AM
Today, Sir carried on from last night.  Last night's spanking has meant that He has discovered a new love - forced orgasm.  He knows that He has a slave who loves sex and with the connection that Wwe have i am fortunate to be able to orgasm on command given the right situation. 

When He was using me this morning however, He went beyond what He normally does with me.  i was spent, having had (according to Him as i was not on the planet to know lol!) five orgasms.  i was really happy that He was still inside me fucking me slowly, the feeling was blissful and i was glowing.  But He had not finished with me.  He told me again, like last night, that He knew i could take more, that He wanted to see me cum again, that i was going to take it, that i was going to cum for Him again... Then He slapped my face several times and that was like switching on the circuit to my pussy again!  He slapped my arse too and i could feel everything charging up for another climax... Nothing could have stopped it, but after it subsided He still did not stop.  i was begging Him, i could not cum again, i was finished; but He wasn't.  Again i heard, you can take more, you will cum for me again.  i was allowed to use my fingers on my clit, i was desperate to please Him.  He had to fuck me hard and hit me as i rubbed my clit, but eventually i felt an orgasm, smaller as it was rising and hitting me...

i love being ordered and forced to do things by my Master; submission is such a huge turn on for me.  i get horny being told i will be ordered to do something i really will find genuinely difficult.  i have to say however, that the most wonderfully sexy thing on this earth for me, is hearing my Master's voice in my ear telling me He knows i can take it and that He wants me to do it for Him.  It is that which makes me want to work even harder for Him...

i love You Sir xxxxxxx

10/21/2008 4:11:02 AM
Last night Master recognised how tense and stressed out i was feeling (alot to to do with time of the month) and ordered me to go and fetch His gloves; He told me that He was going to spank me.  i was just starting to make Him some food, but i dropped everything to obey.

i came back into the kitchen to find Him sitting on one of the chairs.  i gave Him His gloves (black leather) and He bent me over His lap; my hands on the floor, my feet off it.  He took down my knickers and started off slowly and sensuously stroking and patting my bare arse cheeks, gradually getting firmer and slapping harder.  i was loving it, waiting for the moment when He would grab me firmly round my waist so i could not move.  He did this several times, held me tight so He could spank me very, very hard.  He likes to do that for 6 spanks on each cheek together.  It felt wonderful, such a powerful and beautiful pain.  Then He started probing my pussy with His fingers, i was so wet i had got His trousers damp, but He was not stopping and He used His fingers gently, rubbing me to a lovely orgasm.  When He had finished He made me stand up and i saw the mess i had made on His leg...  He looked pleased and asked me if i wanted more.  i said yes please!  He bent me over and spanked me again, harder this time and dug His fingers into my just cum pussy. He rubbed my clit and pussy so hard it was starting to get painful.  He told me He knew i could take it, that i was to cum again for Him.  He beat me again and again as He was rubbing my pussy and i had no choice; the orgasm was forced on me and it was wonderfully powerful.  Hearing His voice and feeling His hand on my arse...Heaven...

10/12/2008 5:13:04 AM
Happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to the happiest slave on the planet.....
Happy birthday to me!

Master, if You read this....thankYou for this morning!!!!!!!!

10/8/2008 6:38:53 AM
Master is back - total bliss.....

10/5/2008 5:10:43 AM
Ok, be honest with me.  Do i look like a bloke?  i have just been accused of being a bloke and wished "happy wanking son" from a so called Dom...  i am upset, hurt and shaking.  Why i have let this person get to me i don't know...

i love that i have such lovely friends on here who have told me to stop being so ridiculous as to let something like that get to me lol! Big hugs to everyone on here! 

Can't wait to Sir gets back to me tomorrow...feeling aaaaaaall woman lol!

10/2/2008 1:42:29 PM
This afternoon Master sent me a task to do.  i love to do tasks for Him when He is away; it challenges me and makes me feel closer to Him.  i have just completed this task and He has instructed me to write it up.

He had me weight down two long candles and position them lengthwise over the end of the table so that they were the right distance apart when i was underneath, that the wax would drip onto the inside of my thighs.  i had to tie my knees to the table legs so that my thighs were held apart and i could not protect my most delicate parts from the dripping wax...  i was to stay in that position; wax dripping down my thighs until it reached my pussy.  It was so painful, but i love wax and so the pain turned into pleasure not long after it began.  i had to wait quite a while before i could feel it on my pussy, but then it started to splash from my thighs onto my outer lips and then inner... Oh that hurt!  Then i was allowed to stop, insert a gloved finger and rub slowly, avoiding my clit for 15 minutes before being allowed to cum.

My orgasm was long and intense....another blissful task completed.  ThankYou Master!!  i can't wait for You to come back to me on Monday!!!! XXX

9/27/2008 9:54:51 AM
Wanted to write something, but not sure what.  Master and i have had a strange week.  The sentence on my profile will remain there for three more weeks, but Sir and i are stronger than ever.  i think i have learned so much from this episode and my submission has deepened even more than i ever thought it could. 

i call myself a slave; that is how i identify and what i fervently feel.  But i realise now that some of my behaviour lately has been more in keeping with those of a submissive.  i am changing this with His help as He knows this is what i truly am. 

i had my first tattoo a week ago and this has also changed my perspective on life.  It is a vanilla tattoo, chosen by me, but approved by Sir as His mark.  Fittingly, it contains several S shapes and lines reminiscent of whips, but  i only realised this after i had picked the design.  Sir had said that i would know the right design as soon as i saw it and He was right, of course.  None of my vanilla friends will know the S's stand for Slayer, slave, submission, strength, serenity etc etc  Oh and yes, before You ask, it did hurt!  i took my favourite CD to play; We have used it in scenes and i thought it would put me in the right headspace (it worked).  Also Master was there and i was in my collar - pure painful bliss and very spiritual...His voice, that music...wonderful.  It took about an hour and you can see it on my photos...slightly red as it had just been finished!

9/15/2008 12:33:20 AM
Last night was intense......but Sir was not here.  Most of the time when He is not at my house, He sets me tasks to do.  Sometimes they can be little things just to focus my mind, other times they are more challenging.

Over the phone He told me to strip so that i was wearing nothing more than my collar and my high heels.  i had to get a candle, matches, clothespegs and the new flogger.

i had to put the pegs on my nipples, then drip wax all over them and the pegs.  They had to become encased in wax enough so that when i flogged them the pegs did not come off...

i knelt infront of the mirror with the candle lit, my hair tied back.  It was tricky to get the drips of wax in the right place to start with as the flame was so near my face, but once i had it, it got easier.  The initial pain, sharp and exquisite subsided after a moment and became something beautiful.  It was a feeling that took me to a lovely place and i didn't want it to stop...

Once my nipples were covered i took a couple of photos for Sir, then i stood up and picked up the flogger.  i was nervous of flogging my own nipples, but i knew why i was doing it.  It was not that easy to get the right angle, and the falls kept getting caught in the pegs.  However, i tried to flog the pegs off, but they did not budge...

Taking them off when i had completed my task was an interesting sensation....The ends of the pegs were totally fused with wax...

i reported back to Sir that i had completed His task and sent a photo.  He allowed me to wank for 15 minutes without coming...after 15 minutes i was allowed to orgasm, but just within the next 30 seconds.  Oh such bliss!  Incredible!  i had to use a pillow to cry His name into...

ThankYou Master.  i hate being without You, but Your attention and love towards Your slave when Wwe are apart is humbling and truly incredible.  i love You Sir, with all my heart xxxxxxxxxx

9/7/2008 10:36:37 AM
The Rubber Ball 2008.  What can i say...? Wonderful, humilation, pain, tears, flying, inversion, suspension, orgasms, liberation, amazing, blissful.  Words are simply not enough.... i love You Master, thankYou xxx

9/1/2008 11:52:29 PM
Forgot to say that Wwe went to the London munch on Friday.  What a great night Wwe had and there was such a fabulous and tingling atmosphere in the air.  Wwe met some lovely people and Wwe have every intention of eventually playing with some of them!  How exciting!  If Wwe can make the next one then count Uus in! xxx

8/21/2008 5:42:39 AM

Warning, this is a long one...


Last night.  i have been trying to get last night into words and have failed miserably.  However, Master has requested that i try and so, as always, i will obey...


The build up took up the previous two days.  i was to dress as sluttily as possible; slutty makeup and pigtails.  This i have no problems in doing in private, but in public i felt intensely self conscious, exposed and uneasy.  i am a slave slut whore, but His slave slut whore... i took photos and emailed Him; i was relieved and happy that He liked them.


The evening was approaching when He was to be here.  He had instructed me to clear the Wendy House in the garden as He was going to put me in it.  i was tingling all over with anticipation and a bundle of nerves all day; i felt like i was about to play for the very first time...He wouldn’t really put me in there would He?  It was going to rain afterall…

It was growing dark and Master told me to get my collar.  i knelt and He put it round my neck and stripped me.  He gagged me, put cuffs on my wrists and hands, chained my hands and feet together, hands behind my back, blindfolded me and led me by my lead into the rainy, dark garden.  The grass felt wet and squelchy, i hesitated.  i coudn't see and i was cold and scared.  This was really happening and my body was not mine to save.

Blindfolded and totally in His control He brought me to the open door of the Wendy House and pushed me inside.  It is a small space, Master had to stoop and bundle me inside.  i was falling on my knees, not able to control my movements as i was chained.  He pushed me onto my front, knelt behind me and hogtied me.  The hard, wooden floor felt rough and the tiny room smelt dank, goodness knows how many creepy crawlies there are in there.  When He asked me if i wanted Him to take my blindfold off i shook my head, unable to get words out because of the gag.  He left me there, in the dark and cold, terrified and alone. 

 

Gradually i dropped so far into bottom space that i stopped being scared and began to enjoy just being.  i just existed, a thing to please Him, not a person, an it.  So contented and so calm that, when He eventually came back i jumped a mile.   He roughly half dragged, half carried me out of my wooden prison and back onto the grass.  He pushed me onto the floor so that my breasts, stomach, pussy and thighs were in the mud.  He took off the blindfold.  There were candles everywhere, little tea lights and one bigger one in a wine bottle.  i thought briefly how beautiful it looked and then it became clearer why they were there…  One by one, He picked up the tea lights and poured the moulten wax over my naked, exposed and shivering flesh.  The hot wax was so painful it felt almost cold.  It felt so good…… But, as He emptied them, one by one, He put the hot metal cases on my back, oh God…

 

The wax was over, i thought i had got off well, but He had not finished with me.  He began to drag me, still hogtied backwards over the grass.  i felt the grass and the mud seemingly ripping into my flesh and i amber safeworded, but it was only because He wanted to shield Uus from anyone seeing what He had instore for me next.  He got His cock out and ordered me to suck.   i was still hogtied and it was really difficult for me to get my head up and at the right angle, but i desperately wanted to get His cock in my mouth; to please Him and make Him proud of His slave.  He was so big and hard, but i kept going.  Eventually He released my hands so that i could support myself and He fucked my mouth and throat like He was raping me.  i gagged and retched, His relentless fucking continued unabated.  i could not breath and His thrusts were making my eyes water and bile to rise up.  Seeing how much discomfort i was in made Him fuck my face harder and i was horrified to feel the sick feeling over taking me.  It was uncontrollable and i had to wrench my head away to stop it from burning Him.  i spat onto the grass and immediately got His fabulous cock back in my mouth, He needed it and so did i.  He fucked me relentlessly, i was sick over and over and my eyes were streaming, but i wanted His cum i needed to feel it and see it.  He came in a torrent, all over my face, it was beautiful, so much of it.  i felt so lucky.

 

Master brought me back in the house.  i was covered in mud, candle wax and cum.  i felt so blissful and calm, not quite there.  He took photos of me, took me upstairs and bathed me.  i felt so loved, so wanted and completely unworthy of such attention.

 

Coming down from all that will take a while for me.  i never want to come out of bottom space completely, but i know that vanilladom will find me and try to claim that i need to be in it at least some of the time, but it can wait….

 

ThankYou Master for making this slave girl’s dreams come true, i love You xxx

7/25/2008 9:04:12 AM
Had been looking forward to a day (tomorrow) of bdsm photography with someone Wwe had met before and really liked.  However, as with most things on here, it seems like this is no longer happening *sighs*  What is wrong with folk that they can't send a simple message...Master and i don't get much time to really let Oour hair down and Wwe plan all Oour free weekends accordingly.  Feel a little deflated now... Still, there will always be time for plenty of private play!!!!! 

7/20/2008 9:13:49 AM

As i submerge myself further and further into my slavery, i have come to realise that i have never been as happy as i am now.  There are many many things i have yet to experience but Master has been training me at a pace He knows i can handle and can succeed at.  i am so grateful that i have found someone who brings out the best in me, a Man i have been able to trust from the beginning.  Not just a Master but a real person with integrity and honesty, someone who can make me laugh, hold me when i cry and love me for the person i am and am becoming.  It overwhelms me at times and i truly know how lucky i am. 


6/26/2008 2:33:15 AM
i bought Rubber Ball tickets for Master and myself YEEEEEYYYY!!!!  i cannot wait, Wwe went last year and it was so much fun.  They had a great dungeon and i am not sure how much time Wwe actually spent out of it lol!  Let me know if Yyou lovely people are planning on going; the more the merrier hehe!  Wwe are planning on going to TG on the Friday night too....


6/8/2008 5:39:56 AM

Master and i recently met up with an absolutely lovely couple from CM in a vanilla bar and ended up having an impromptu (and fairly discreet) little bit of a play!  Great people and Wwe are looking forward to seeing them again soon.  i know other folk have tried to tell me, but WOW!  REAL PEOPLE DO EXIST ON HERE lol!!!


6/1/2008 10:00:31 AM
i love clingfilm........  Last night Master and i experimented with the stuff for the first time after i had developed something of an obsession with mummification.  Photos will be uploaded on Master's profile soon i hope.  It was an amazing experience and i can't wait to do it again!

ThankYou Master!!

6/1/2008 9:42:17 AM
Wwe got back from Crete yesterday morning!  Wwe had the best time ever and it was sooo romantic.  Wwe got to the hotel at 6am, just in time to watch the sunrise over the sea from the balcony of Oour room, sipping champagne and holding my beautiful flowers (all arranged by the most wonderful man on the planet; who happens to be my Master). 

Wwe had lots of play, lots of sex, lots of food and lots of drink.  i fell even more deeply in love with Him than ever...

5/15/2008 4:32:04 AM
WHY?!  Ok, this seems to be an ongoing theme on the boards too... Why is it that when you try to set up a playdate folk are really up for it, but then in reality are actually leading you on...?  Master and i have been let down, by someone on CM, who appeared to be an experienced and genuine sub...i will not name names, but he knows who he is.  Master is now of the opinion that there are no real people on here and that He may just give up...  Doms that end up being submissive...subs that just disappear...Dommes who are just plain rude and inexperienced... Ah well....  Are Wwe real?  YES, but then HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW unless Wwe meet????????????????

4/29/2008 6:05:24 AM
i have been shopping!  i bought three new lovely gorgeous riding crops, each one different.  Weight, material, size....each one i know will hurt in a different way and each one will be YUMMY!!!  i bought them from the local sports shop (sooo much cheaper than kink shops) and managed to resist trying them out on myself infront of the other shoppers.  It was funny however, noticing the looks on folks' faces at the checkout; i know for a fact that some of them knew that i was not going anywhere near a horse with them lol!  Happy days!!!!!!!!

4/28/2008 8:44:30 AM
Master has informed me that He wants to use me in a scene with another sub, a male.  i am excited and nervous, but trust Him implicitly.  After the last time another person was involved i am much more relaxed about the proposition.  The thing that i am honestly dreading is the feel of another man inside me... i am a monogamous person, but it will be another form of submission and so i will do as i am told...  

4/21/2008 2:58:46 AM
Master and i got back from an amazing long weekend in Amsterdam last night.  Apart from some wonderful play and a visit to the fab torture museum, i had my first experience with MFF and it was ok!  i was concentrating so much on Master that my submission became more of a feeling of empowerment!  Suffice to say that Master had a great time and i am more open to doing it again...
Can't wait to go back, but will look out for dates when the Clinic is on as i REALLY missed going fetish clubbing, vanilla clubs don't do it for me at all now...

4/11/2008 2:11:03 AM
OH I LOVE MY LIFE!!!!!!

Sorry i just had to get that out lol! xxx

3/5/2008 6:35:40 AM
Hmmm....  i have been naughty.  Won't go into the details suffice to say that Master is disappointed in my behaviour.  i have been punished, but He has also instructed me to make it known in public.  Training will be stepped up...

i hope to put this right as soon as i can and return to His favour.  i hate letting Him down in any way...


1/30/2008 12:31:57 PM
This is to say a huge thankyou to all who have contacted me since my mini rant lol!  It is a pleasure to have talked to you and am still talking to many of you.  Hooray for real people as into this lifestyle as Master and i are! xxx

1/9/2008 2:16:41 AM
So...ever since i updated my profile to say that i am in love with my Master i have had no messages...Hmmm is everyone so shallow on here?  Let me see now, i am not an easy lay, you can't get into my knickers without Master's express permission so does that mean you will no longer bother??  Are there no genuine people on here that want to scene with us??  WHERE ARE YOU??

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