Stolen from yet someone else but also excellent,.....what is a good Dom/me:?
A good Dominant will not read a few pages on the internet, have a look through a book and then declare himself an experienced master with many years experience and several “trained submissives” under his belt.
Most good Dominants have taken the time and trouble to attend workshops and seminars and have perhaps had lessons from or sought advice from other Dominants more experienced than themselves.
There are many so called Dominants who do not know the difference between being dominant and being domineering.
A domineering person thinks that it is all about “being in charge” no matter what. Domineering people are often overbearing, loud and tyrannical – yes they exercise control, but it is done in an oppressive way, they are unjust and severe in their treatment of the people around them and their control is often enforced with threats of physical punishment and with no thought for anyone but themselves.
On the other hand, a Dominant person also exercises complete control but it is done in a more subtle way, with influences and thoughts rather than threats and physical punishments.
Dominants care about the people around them, and though they can be authoritarian and powerful, they have the utmost respect for others and a high level of care and consideration.
So a good Dominant, takes responsibility for the submissive or submissives in His life, He controls them and dominates them, but He is empathetic to them and sympathetic to their needs, understanding that for any submissive to give their best, they must be secure and confident in their submission.
A good Dominant is respectful of others, both submissive and dominant, and is not too proud to ask for advice or help if it is needed.
A good Dominant is the one whose name comes up in conversation time and time again, he is the one who is sought out for advice, or help.
He is the one who other Dominants aspire to be like, he is a role model to up and coming Dominants, and he is the one that many submissives would like to belong to.
A good Dominant is popular within the scene and makes time for everyone, and more importantly, does not belittle others, no matter what he may think. He treats everyone with respect and kindness, but does not suffer fools and is not afraid to speak his mind and tell someone off should it be necessary.
He also tries to be non-political, as far as is possible, not entering into arguments or disagreements, but instead is more likely to act as a pacifier and an arbitrater in an effort to diffuse the situation rather than inflame it.
