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EveyHammond

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Friends:
Obeyancedarkangel45bitoyboyuk

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Right now I don't know what I am any more. I have failed at slavehood - but still find myself drawn to that side of submission. I'm a masochist for sure, I am aroused, I revel, I enjoy pain until I float away on it. As a woman over forty perhaps I am too old to be a little, but I've never grown out of being His girl, having Daddy, a paternal Master or Dom - even if I can be a teeny bit brattish at times. I like to serve. I like to see Him happy. This is my aim. His happiness and contentment first, mine second. When you have my trust, I'm yours forever.

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5/27/2014 1:05:39 PM
Made it onto ... And am really enjoying it. If anyone wants to add me there, let me know, I have a different screen name x

5/22/2014 3:43:03 PM
After someone here sent me a mail telling me to commit suicide, I won't be writing anything else. Anyone decent can find me elsewhere.

5/18/2014 3:29:10 AM
Still awfully low. But thank you so much to the people that care and have sent me such lovely mails. Every one is appreciated. If there were such a thing as a cuddle slut I would be one right now, tucked up safely on His lap, hands stroking my hair, whispering love and service. At peace.

5/17/2014 9:36:41 AM
I went to the doctor.... I went to the mountains, I looked to the children, I drank from the fountains... There's more than one answer to these questions, pointing me in a crooked line. Closer to Fine.

5/17/2014 7:06:02 AM
I just want my Master :(

5/17/2014 3:17:58 AM
Please note that I am not looking for anyone at this time. I'm hurting a lot. I don't know how to go on. I'm just existing. I wasn't enough. I swear I won't put myself here again. :(

5/17/2014 1:55:47 AM
It's not your fault for hurting me. It's mine for thinking you wouldn't.

5/16/2014 11:11:44 AM
Fin.

4/26/2014 2:37:59 PM
Sometimes I feel like this profile is the only voice I have.

4/25/2014 11:32:27 AM
My journal. So here we are at the weekend again. A time when it usually all goes wrong for me. This week has been an optimistic one however. I've had a lovely evening out... My diet is going well now I'm not starving myself, and just learning to cut out the rubbish, and I'm learning to accept who I am. This last one is the most difficult. The weekends for me always seem so dull compared to friends. I don't go clubbing or to the pub, I don't really eat out as both my husband and son have other interests. I like to read, love politics and catching up on the weeks TV, watching a film maybe, listening to music.... going to the cemetery, for a walk, to see my Dad, shopping - any kind of shopping but especially for vintage clothes. For a coffee, (caffeine addict that I am!) pottering on the computer, gardening. So I'm quiet? Who cares! So long as I am happy, and He is happy too.... That's all that matters!!! :)x

4/23/2014 2:13:16 PM
I'm also trying to figure out whether petite with curves and chubby are the same thing. Aheemmmm

4/23/2014 1:30:19 PM
Today was a good day. Work was good and busy - and I got a payrise! Everything seems calmer, I've realised that for so many years in the lifestyle, I've become selfish, rather than wanting to be selfless, and a good slave. I have to try harder. I've also learnt a lot about punishment over the past few days. A slave should always know what they are being punished for. Their punishment should be fitting. Not an overreaction or done in temper. And when the slave has served their punishment their should be a time for reflection and coming back together. It's hard to remain out in the cold. Just a few of my thoughts today x

4/22/2014 1:11:33 PM
My journal. I feel very uncomfortable. I've been terribly stupid and ruined everything. Trying to be someone else has cost me dearly, I fear. I just want to go back to the twinkling Christmas lights and start over. I want to cry, and fall asleep with my head on his lap. Curled up like a little girl.

4/21/2014 1:01:21 PM
My journal. I had bagel for breakfast. I've been ill in bed today. I had a seizure. And slept a lot. Probably because for a few days I missed meds before today. Tonight I have ribs for dinner. I've learnt today that I should always try and be myself. Even if people don't like that, it was always my best. Trying to be someone else makes me ill, physically and psychologically, and doesn't help anyway. Tonight I feel very lonely. Having no affection and being alone are the worst punishments a person can have. I feel like I have been carrying them for a while now, and am breaking. I don't know what to do next. I went back to the bus stop, which is a walk backward for me. I want my mom, which is crazy, she passed on four years ago. Pain is good but anguish, howling inside. I can't carry this weight for long. x

4/21/2014 5:54:06 AM
Who is gonna save you when I'm gone Who'll watch over you Who will give you strength when you're not strong? :(

4/21/2014 3:19:45 AM
Just an observation from my time here. Avoid listening if someone says "I want you, I want D/s. If it was just sex I could get it anywhere..." Avoid being the nearest anywhere....

4/21/2014 12:10:01 AM
It's finished. I was abandoned. That's all I can say. Hurt beyond words. My body howls with anguish. I know only one way to end the disquiet. I'm sorry, I was a failure.

4/20/2014 3:11:04 PM
I would like to thank a certain female slave for taking the time to explain so much to me today. I'd lost my way in so many ways. Trapped between being a slave and a selfish masochist. Probably due to being alone for so long and satisfying my own needs. It's like starting all over again. I've been very silly and selfish. Thank you so much xx

4/20/2014 2:05:48 PM
First night alone. Scared. Had a migraine. I ate. My first proper meal in weeks. And I had an Easter Egg. I took all my pills too. I can't be a good slave if I don't eat and drink and look after myself. I'll keep going to the gym to get fit, but no more mad diets. God made me this shape. And I felt sexy this way. I wasn't overweight. So dieting to please someone was silly. I realise that now. I'm going to concentrate on being me. Creating and accepting my personality. And someone will want me for me. I hope it will be Him. I wait patiently. I know I've been wrong. But I carry on. It's all I can do. For now, alone.

4/20/2014 11:00:04 AM
For Him. I wear this collar in the full knowledge that it is for life. I will continue to wear it. I will eat breakfast every day. I will journal every evening. I will edge, but never more, at bedtime every night. I will come when I am called. I will keep watch. I will be a good slave. And when the earth shall claim my limbs, Then I shall truly dance. For I served Him well.

4/20/2014 9:58:33 AM
I can see you, but I can't feel you, anymore.....

4/20/2014 3:57:11 AM
Darkling, I listen; and for many a time, I am half in love with easeful death. Keats, Ode to a Nightingale. Half in love with an easy death? Does that mean the other half wants something painful? To stay alive, or die in pain? Which is worse?

4/12/2014 1:20:29 AM
Where angels dare Devils fill that need, In your despair He gets up to leave. Caro Emerald.

4/11/2014 2:57:33 PM
Written Waiting for a Bus. By LH. I'm a stupid cunt sometimes. Some things will always be, As surely as the sky is blue and the stars and the moon are swathed in colour, Just as Vincent saw them from the innermost reaches of his mind. All that time ago I'm utterly alone. Lost. A sweet smelling red rose falls to the ground, withering, turning into my heart. Slowing. Missing it's beats... Misfiring like an old car on a dirt track. My heart turning into a specimen on a scale, A solitary lovebird feeding on its blood. I will ever learn? Maybe when I am at One with Tao or the universe or everything! Maybe then I'll know what love is. What was expected of me... What May saw in her shattered dreams. I need someone to hold me and rock me to sleep. But there is no one there. No hand on my hand. If I close my eyes, will you fall asleep? Half in love, with easeful promises. The warm evening sun on my own face, just like the bard. As I listen out for my nightingale, I wonder, Did I ever think otherwise?

4/11/2014 12:18:29 PM
Some days I feel like I need pain like a junkie needs a fix. I need to feel my body hurt to stop my senses working. To turn me on, but more than that, to feel human. Alive. If no one else can provide it, I will find a way myself x

4/10/2014 12:41:31 PM
Having a fat day. That is to say, having a day where I disgust myself. More than normal, I should say. Been a lot of that lately. Self confidence oozed away. Battered. Feel very lost and alone. Giving is more important than receiving they say. But sometimes giving your soul and receiving not a moments thought, is soul destroying. Caring so much that your heart breaks. But no one hears it. I'm unlovable. And so. I loathe myself. And disgust myself for what I am. Worthless. Ready to be swept away into the gutter.

4/9/2014 3:08:38 PM
A Maserati in a world of Kias, Genius would describe any of my ideas, If I was born in 1453, Leonardo Da Vinci would be jealous of me.... Rockin' in my bathtub to the Steel Panthers.

4/9/2014 12:45:35 PM
Still feeling unsettled. Comparing myself to others is something I do. I'm never good enough. I don't run marathons. I don't have phds. I don't have beautiful children, businesses, a career. I'm worthless. Useless. Good only for pain. Sex. Emptiness. Good only to give. If all you are is a gift not worth giving, then what is the point of existence.

4/7/2014 1:50:17 PM
Need some time alone. Sorry for not replying to mails. Just feeling down. Back soon xxx

4/6/2014 2:45:00 AM
I'm so unhappy today :( I wish it was Monday and I was at work :/

4/4/2014 3:29:45 PM
Ugh. I am an idiot. Ugh ugh.

4/4/2014 1:18:07 PM
I'm really pleased!! I've lost four pounds, weight wise. I need to lose so much more. Another seven pounds or so. It seems like a massive task! But no matter. I just wish I could do better with the exercise. :/

4/3/2014 12:21:26 PM

I loved Mexico when I was there.... sun, sea, sand... and lots of gorgeous suntanned skin to look at, male and female!It was kinda easy to get aroused. Especially with all that tequila on tap. 

 

Most folks were pretty chatty, so it was easy to get talking to anyone I kinda took a shine too. All holiday there was this particular French Canadian teacher. He was hot. Tall, slim, dark, and I loved his accent!

 

We kept looking at one another... smiling, winking....saying hi.... a little flirting at lunch and dinner. Then one evening he was in the late evening bar and I was alone - we both were.

 

It wasnt long before we were chatting.... sharing jokes, looks, smiles, touching each other on the hand, the arm, the knee... the leg...... Another drink and we were sharing intimacies. Holding hands.  And as soon as it started it finished. We were walking to my room.... on floor eleven. At the end of the corridor.

 

We took the lift. He barely waited for the doors to close and he embraced me. Pushed me against the wall of the lift. Kissed me hard on the mouth. Tongue finding mine. Hand running up my tanned leg and under my panties.... squeezing me.

 

The lift doors openned and he walked me to the door, just beyond it, a balcony.... overlooking the pools and the sea. He took me there. We kissed for a while.... hands everywhere...... Him hard, pressed against me. He reached up, undid the string of my halterneck. Let it fall to expose my breasts. My nipples hardened. It wasnt cold... just the cool night air... The pleasure.... He bent his head to me and he put each of my nipples in his mouth in turn, sucking, biting... holding.... I could feel my panties wet.   He turned me to look at the sea, the pools, my breasts exposed for anyone to see who looked up in the darkness. I didnt care. 

 

His hands found my wetness.... he pulled my panties down harshly and made me step out of them. Rubbing my backside, spreading my legs, pushing his fingers between my legs. Finding me swollen and wet. He pushed his fingers into me hard as I looked out at the sea and fucked me hard with them. I reached behind to pull his cock out from his pants, but he grabbed my hands and bent me over a little, restraining me. I was really aroused and a little scared.... but he was whispering to me in French and I was so goddamn horny I exploded over his fingers and the floor. He unbuckled himself and pulled out his thick hard cock...... pushing it between my legs.... finding me swollen, pulsating... He fucked me..... thrusting..... pushing all of him into me... I could feel all of him, slapping against me.... right down to his balls..... Fucking me hard he bit into my shoulder, pinching my nipples with his free hand..... fondling me harshly....

 

He grabbed me by the hair and brought me to my knees..... and wanked himself over my tongue until he came..... all over my exposed breasts.

 

I was breathless..... so was he.... we stayed quiet for a few moments, listening to the sea, and vague distant voices, before dressing... me, pulling my cotton halter neck over my sticky breasts.

 

I stood to hug and thank him.... and noticed.... movement in the shadows. Just slight. I could see a man. Behind one of the pillars in the hotel corridor about 5 yards away.

We had been watched. As we walked by I could see who it was. A spanish guy, on holiday with his family.

 

We laughed and said goodnight. Remained friends long after the holiday. But knowing I had been watched meant that I was so horny... I went back to my room and made myself cum over and over just imagining having him jerk off in the shadows.

 

:)


4/3/2014 6:52:16 AM
What a wonderful life..... for as long as You've been at my side, And I want you to know..... that I miss You so. :) <3

3/31/2014 12:51:32 AM
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, can't find a better man....

3/27/2014 10:43:57 AM
Nothing in life is any more permanent than a wave in the ocean: yet the day I met Him, I fell toward Him like a stone toward the ground, and He will be in my heart forever. :)

3/25/2014 3:40:30 PM
Ok. On behalf of all curvaceous, soft skinned, Rubenesque women. I should like to say... Some women eat cake. Some men worship curves. This is perfect harmony as far as I see it. Even a dog in the yard wants some meat on the bones you throw it. Dieting is over. Bring back my corset. :)

3/24/2014 1:39:43 PM
I'm really touchy about weight. I used to be a real big girl and if anyone makes a mere mention of my size these days I go on a crash course in diet and exercise. A couple of people have mentioned my thighs, ass and belly. Arrgghh!!! I've taken this to heart and am really watching the intake now. Back to the gym too to tone up. Just have to find some will power :0

3/23/2014 1:42:15 PM
I suppose some things, even the present tense..... are... Lost in Translation.

3/23/2014 2:26:49 AM
Bad migraine. Third day. In bed today. Drugs slowly doing their job. I love the scene at the end of Ghost Town where Enid Coleslaw heads for the bus stop to get her bus. Old life over. Time to get the bus somewhere far away. Perhaps the author was trying to represent something else. Catching the bus. I think it might have been one way Enid went. *smiles*

3/22/2014 3:00:50 PM
So much I can't control. I turn inwards. What is there. I can control myself. I can let out a silent scream that no one will hear and no one will see. Warm, stinging, hot, searing. I can release my feelings in this dark place where no one but me sees, feels, hears. Relief drips out of me. Pours. It's salty taste, deep, rich, warm.... it's velvety hues all my own.... I sit alone in the dark and feel normal again. In the dark, in that moment. So transient. A wave of calm. Stillness... Endorphins.... caused by pain, ease my pain. An oxymoron. Washing over me. Like the sea.

3/22/2014 12:23:19 PM
Why is it that when a Dom owns a sub, the sub has to put it on their profile but the Dom never does? Hmmm

3/22/2014 10:57:31 AM
I'd send a flare but.... No one would see it. It would burn unnoticed. That's ok. That's my place. Bobbing along, unnoticed. Unwanted? Unneeded? Perhaps. I stay on course. I'm migrainous and sick today. I feel like I'm set sail toward something I have no control over. All I can do is hold on and wait and hope that the storm passes, and my tiny insignificant vessel carries on its way. But this weekend is going to pass. Whatever happens. However I feel. The sun goes down over my bow and will rise again... I'll sail on my own. I'm not going to ruin anything or let anyone down just because I can't cope. I hope to feel the sun and the wind on my face as I find home. As I finally melt away x

3/21/2014 11:57:55 AM
Today I need to be mindful of my inner chimp. He's telling me that I'm a little overweight, a little stupid, my life just lurches this way and that. So tonight I will mainly be caging my inner chimp, avoiding chocolate and tweeting Steve Peters about the goddamn addictive nature of his literature.

3/20/2014 3:05:57 PM

The very smell of Him makes me feel safe and warm. The feel of His soft skin is comforting. His voice, washes over me and His hands keep me close.

?

In the half light, He undresses me, cradling me in His arms, lips finding my nipples hard, erect; I suddenly feel between my legs begin to throb. His tongue traces down, His head, between my legs.... tongue parting my labia, finding me aching, swollen..... wanting. I held Him there. Sighing, never wanting it to stop. Never wanting Him to stop.

?

He knew, His face buried deep in me, covered in my juices. He rose above me and kissed me, so that I could taste myself on Him, suck His tongue. I felt Him. Enter me. Take me. make love to me. Slowly, deliberately, meaningfully. Me holding Him in me. Him caressing, moving over me. Thrusting into me. He came and I felt Him .... pour out into me. Mixing with my own juices,? my own cum. And then He kissed me. And held me.

?

And I knew that everything would be alright.

?

Later we sat, Him working, me, at His feet, kneeling, sharing a joke. Him sharing some wisdoms. Ive been very troubled lately. The time leading up to seeing my Mother was hard. Afterwards I fell into a hole. I compare myself with others too much. This will never make me happy. I have to learn to let this go. I'll try hard. With His help.

?

Thank You Sir. For everything.

?

?


3/19/2014 3:22:59 PM
Ok I have decided its probably not a good idea to be depressed in charge of a keyboard so am gonna go do something else before I press the self destruct button :0

3/19/2014 11:51:52 AM
My sex drive has just totally driven off! :(

3/18/2014 1:50:32 AM
Thanks for all the lovely messages. Apologies if I missed replying to any but was preoccupied last night. xxx

3/17/2014 12:24:21 PM
Tomorrow I am going to see my Mom's grave. I've never been. So it's kind of a big deal. She died four years ago, and I was with her at the end, I nursed her at home. But after she died Dad decided to go bury her against her own wishes, so I couldn't face all the bad feeling that occurred. It broke my heart. I went to the cemetery on Sunday and found out where she is. So tomorrow I'm going to go. I think. I had an odd relationship with my folks. I was always the black sheep. Never good enough. Part of me is saying dont sweat it she didn't care about you anyway. Part of me really wants my mom back, even just for a day.

3/17/2014 4:00:31 AM
In spring, life is so fragile. A frost could kill anything that isn't strong enough to survive. The coldness of winter has passed. But the sun isn't strong enough, the night draws in too quickly still. Some things survive. Others die and return to nourish the soil. Either way, come summer, both see the sun. Just one has beauty and glory, remains, hidden but beautified in their own way.

3/16/2014 3:14:21 PM
I feel lonely and like I don't have a friend in the world. When I was collared before I worked. In a busy job in a huge office. For a gregarious man. It was fun. It gave me some fun. Now. I work in a tiny place where I don't feel comfy, jobs aren't safe.... And it's fun, but underneath I know that one false move and I'm for it. I feel quite alone. Last time, I had a sister too. This time no. I have stupid 'me' things I can't trouble Him with but I'd like to chat about. It's a weight on my mind. A sister... Oh well. Maybe one day. I didn't get my treat this weekend. I was supposed to go for a sauna and jacuzzi but had a migraine and it would have made it worse. That's just left me a little low I think and I feel like a spoilt brat because it was the BBB and I couldn't go, I didn't go to the gym, I didn't get anything fun. But then is a collared girl supposed to have fun? I give freely. To Him. I wait on His every word. Just sometimes I wonder if He realises what goes on in my tiny whirlwind. It feels like He doesn't see. And why should I say and darken His day? Strange musings. I do love Him x

3/16/2014 11:20:58 AM
Shattered. What a weekend. I've gotten through it and I needed to, but I'm tired, in pain... I just want my bed and it's just six pm here. I'm not moaning. I'd happily do more. But I'm just glad my bed isn't far away :) I also seemed to do a million things, and I'd promised myself some fun, a treat. But the treat disappeared somehow into the ever decreasing circles of housework, shopping, gardening. This is my life. I'll get my treat soon.

3/16/2014 3:00:14 AM
Just because you are 'dominant' doesn't mean you are my Dominant. Just because you can go through the motions and make some silly tart behave like an idiot for you doesn't mean all submissives will cowtow to you or are yours to look down on. Being Dominant is more than being cruel, sadistic, mean, without care for the feelings of your girl. These things make you domineering. A dim Dom. A true Dom, even a sadist, I've been owned by one and played with more, nurtures. Cares for His property and respects the property of another. I'm His. When He beckons I hear Him. I stand tall in His name. I will have His collar around my neck. He is in my heart. And I in His. Your remonstrations are just white noise in the back of my head. I take pain for Him gladly. What can you do? And when we are still One, you will be long forgotten.

3/16/2014 1:01:36 AM
Ouch. Migraine. And it's a beautiful day outside... Spring... Warm... I have flowers to put in baskets. Damn where do these aches and pains come from, and what makes them so much less tolerable than being flogged, or caned? If only I knew! In bed with Tylenol and tea. Grumpy little me :P

3/15/2014 11:32:32 AM

I have to write about when I was controlled by someone. A story. I suppose once upon a time a long time ago I was totally controlled by someone. He took me from a directionless girl and changed me into a woman. His woman. His toy. There, with a collar around my neck. Used for His pleasure and perversion. Someone who could never refuse Him. But someone who was safe, protected, cared for.... wanted. And loved.

 

He would have me go to His office. I had to wear a suit for my job, and stockings... but no underwear.... He made that decision. I'd stand there, eyes looking somewhere between the floor, the ornate wood on His desk, the piles of files laced with red ribbon, the scribbled notes in blue books. But never looking at Him. Waiting. Door shut, faint voices and footsteps outside.

 

Eventually He would come to me. His hand tracing through the curls of my long hair. Just as He liked it. He might be nice to me, He might sneer. He might ask of me. He might even suggest food. Or have a gift. Depending if the work I had done to help Him had been valuable. If I had pleased Him. Or if His day was successful. I never knew. My stomach always flipped. I shook, either way. Wanting to please this man, wanting to see Him happy had become the centre of my world.

 

His hand would move further. Down my back. To my buttocks. He would smile. I would have to show Him.... every time. I'd unbutton my suit and my shirt. All the way. Turn to Him. Let Him see my breasts. I was a young woman. Pert. Pretty rosebud nipples and peachy skin. I'd have to lift my skirt also. I was kept shaved. He liked to see my cunt, my arse...

 


He'd bend me over. He wore a belt of course, a thick back one. He'd hold my head down by my hair and pull up my skirt.... parting my legs. He'd whisper to me that I was His dirty little slut. I'd be forced to agree. Forced by my love for Him, my pledge to serve Him with my life, and by my submission to Him. I was enraptured as first of all He would rub my buttocks, then start slapping me gently, then more harshly..... stinging... burning.... then by using His belt, doubled over, strapping me. As it caught my pussy I would start to ache. Swell. Throb. He had me completely. I'd beg. Beg. Beg again. Sometimes I would be fine. Sometimes He let me cum. And sometimes He would ram His three fingers fast and hard into my cunt.... knowing that I couldnt hold back...... Laughing, even as I begged......I would drip and gush and finally squirt, crying to myself with pleasure, relief, shame.... and sometimes just becoming totally lost in the breathing and aching and pain... I couldnt remember anything but His soothing voice at those times. He was wonderful then, kissing my forehead, holding me. Hushing me. Holding me.

 

He never stopped though. I was there for His pleasure. He would make me kneel. He would 'allow' me to please Him. He wasnt a tall man but He had a large cock. Thick, veiny...  I sucked Him willingly, even though He would hold my hair in a ponytail and pull it. Pushing me down onto Him. I wasnt pleasing enough until I had His entire. length in my mouth, and could lick His balls too. I retched. Often. I had no gag reflex then. He would hold me by the chin, give me a moment, talk sweetly to me, slap me if I cried.... but never let me stop. Not until He was ready.

 

Ready to fuck. Then He would turn me over and bend me over His desk. Take whichever hole pleased Him. He was an animalistic man when it came to fucking, to BDSM in general. Tender encounters .... were less probable ... but all the more special. I liked pain. He liked to give it. He would bite my back, my shoulders, dig His nails into me. I could tell when He was ready.

 

I'd be pulled back on my knees, to either receive a mouthful of creamy, salty cum, or have it spurted across my breasts. He was a heavy cummer. He would relax in His chair, rubbing His cum into my breasts as I'd suck Him clean. He'd zip up and help me dress.

 

Then I would either leave alone, aching holes and stinging backside, or sit re applying my make up, waiting for Him to take me to dinner, dressed just as I was. , Breasts covered in sticky cum under my white shirt, wet cunt with my own juices halfway down my legs.

 

 


3/14/2014 1:14:19 PM
And then.... The most lovely email I think I've ever had. I think the weekend will be just fine!!!

3/14/2014 11:52:16 AM
Unsettled. Need a good nights sleep and then get on with all the jobs that lie ahead. Roll on Monday!

3/13/2014 2:10:44 PM
When He holds me everything melts away. His voice calms me: His touch steadies me. I close my eyes and let the feeling of Him wash over me. I feel His hands explore me... bend me over.... and then... I feel a sharp, heavy, slap on my backside. Again and again... My skin becomes hot, burning... every new slap stings, but I... I feel arousal. Wetness inside my panties.... He realises. Touches me there... Roughly pulls my panties to one side. Plunges His fingers into me. I close my eyes.... He continues to spank me... a paddle, a flogger... I feel Him part my legs. I feel the flogger flick across my pussy lips. Again and again. Until I can't hold it any more and my body gives me up.... Pleasure seeping down between my pussy lips and trickling down my legs. When He cuffs me and throws me onto the bed I gasp for Him. His tongue finding my wet cunt. My swollen lips, wet, glistening.... He stands proud over me... Rubbing His cock over my face... a trace of pre cum on my cheek, on my lips... I turn my head to take Him in my mouth and find Him swollen, engorged, hard, ready... I want Him so, but please Him with my mouth until He chooses to use me... I feel every inch of Him fill me, fuck me... take me... And when He shoots His cum inside me I feel His hot pleasure fill me and it feeds my whole soul. Thank You Sir x

3/9/2014 11:43:13 AM
After being spoken to today by several Dominants it would appear that I am badly behaved and not a worthy sub. I am going to remove several of my pathetic useless journal entries. I am not worthy to be owned because of my offensive behaviour. I am going to take a break from the lifestyle and may not return this time - I haven't the strength. I have several deep and dark questions that I have to answer. Matters unresolved from the death of my mother, and from my own ill health. I cannot seek to burden anyone else with my poor behaviour while these matters are unresolved. I genuinely tried with good grace but I need too much support and can't give my Dom the attention and space he requires. Thank You all xxxx

3/9/2014 9:03:40 AM
No more journals. Just causes trouble. I think me and bdsm aren't meant any more. I give up. I just never get anything right and I can't take it any more :(

2/21/2014 10:35:41 AM
Sometimes I hate myself for my selfishness. If my Master wants to enjoy Himself elsewhere then I should be glad that He is happy, not bereft that He shows no interest in me. Jealousy and lack of trust have no place in a Master slave bond. What power have I to complain or leave? Would I want to? Would I want Him to just have me and be less happy? Perhaps I would imagine a Master who would consider my emotions when pleasing Himself. But He need not have to. I'm His property. Does a chattel possess an emotion? The last time I was collared I was but a girl. Now I am a woman. I see the world differently. I ask more questions. Perhaps I should just learn to 'be' again, and then loving my Master might become so much more simple. I'm sorry Sir, for being a fool.

2/20/2014 5:20:24 AM
Sometimes You feel like none of Your struggling is worth it. I wonder if life is worthwhile when I open my eyes in the morning. There is so little joy and love that nothing seems to make the day worthwhile. Pain and misery. Suffering. The agony of knowing that life is full of unhappiness from which your soul can never escape. Sometimes I can't wait until my soul flies high above this place and leaves all this behind.

2/18/2014 1:14:06 PM

For Him. The only man I see in a room full of men. 

 

No te amo como si fueras rosa de sal, topacio
o flecha de claveles que propagan el fuego:
te amo como se aman ciertas cosas oscuras,
secretamente, entre la sombra y el alma.

 

Te amo como la planta que no florece y lleva
dentro de sí, escondida, la luz de aquellas flores,
y gracias a tu amor vive oscuro en mi cuerpo
el apretado aroma que ascendió de la tierra.

 

Te amo sin saber cómo, ni cuándo, ni de dónde,
te amo directamente sin problemas ni orgullo:
así te amo porque no sé amar de otra manera,

 

sino así de este modo en que no soy ni eres,
tan cerca que tu mano sobre mi pecho es mía,
tan cerca que se cierran tus ojos con mi sueño.

 

and in English :

 

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.


(Pablo Neruda, Sonnet 17)

 


2/16/2014 2:25:48 AM
I hate Valentine's day. I hate loved up couple's. I hate romance. Yuk. It's like a turd that had a baby turd that threw up a turd made of toxic filth. Valentine's should be banned. Since when did a pagan festival based on werewolves and death and bloodlust become an excuse for pink champagne and truffles? Somebody flog me ffs.

2/13/2014 7:19:11 AM
I feel like I've really turned a corner today. Of all days. I met my Master today, and we talked through some issues to do with trust and faith. I had faith that He is the One. It felt right, but I couldn't trust Him that one hundred percent. Somehow I was still closing up, holding back. I had given Him access to all of my mail, my messages, my email accounts. All the ones I use anyhow. There were some questions He had. We had a frank talk. I'm glad. I needed to assure Him that I really wanted this. Him. And I needed to hear Him say that He wasn't just like every other Dom or swinger. I knew that already though inside. I feel like layers of me are gradually stripping away. He's getting inside me. Taking control of me. Knowing me. I want to serve Him and Him only. No one else has come close for a very long time. I remember the feel of leather, of steel around the nape of my neck. I remember the sense of belonging to. I feel it again. In every part of me. I ache. To do my best. And when I fail Him every part if me hurts. I'm His. And I'm happier than ever.

2/10/2014 12:31:12 PM
I don't want to go into what I have done but I annoyed - no - I made my Master angry today. Now I have to take my punishment. I'm ashamed of what I've done, but more so I'm shocked about how making Him angry, and displeasing Him has made me feel inside. I'm ashamed. Annoyed with myself. Upset. Frightened. I will take my punishment properly. I'm banned from being on a particular website again until Sir sees fit. I'm going to stay offline altogether, think things through, read, do something else. I must make up for what I have done, because I don't want to lose Him. I'll prove my worth. I can be good.

2/2/2014 4:26:45 AM
Not having a choice makes life easier I suppose. Having to accept what is given is both easier and more difficult in equal measure. I may not like His choices but accept that He knows best and ad my Owner will look after me and see me no harm.

1/28/2014 1:44:11 PM
Who wouldn't want a good girl, a soft hand, a gentle woman for a gentleman? I want some slashes to go with those long eyelashes.... Every woman has an itch. And every nice girl wants to switch. Don't worry. God never gives you more than you can handle. It's just.... breath control.

1/28/2014 11:02:47 AM
Arrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. :(

1/26/2014 5:17:18 AM
S. Thank You for knowing me better than I know myself sometimes. Thank You for not running away! Thank You for liking hard work. Thank You for our conversation and the way You held me. Your girl, in the present tense x

1/22/2014 4:30:54 PM
So much difference a few days makes. I feel like the past week I knotted myself up!!! I'm rereading what I wrote with my eyes half covered. Oohhh dear!!! I won't delete it though. You work through feelings and don't delete them. My Dom must be mad to put up with me, Lord knows, is He testing me or the other way about?! I make a written promise right here to look after Him. Thank You for choosing me Sir x

1/21/2014 6:01:35 AM
Saw my Dom today. Had a chat about subspace. I felt silly that I had let myself get tied up in such knots, and we have made plans so that it won't happen again. I know this is the man I want. I look at Him and I melt. I drop to my knees for Him. I want only to please Him. I know He will look after me. He may not be as experienced as some, but He is no fool. And above all He is a good man. I want His collar. I know it. x

1/20/2014 1:25:19 PM
THANK YOU to two special people. I shant embarrass them by naming them, but my cyber posy was very pretty Ma'am... And to the misplaced man abroad, Sir, for the support and advice on subspace. Warmest thoughts at Your collective feet!

1/19/2014 2:59:28 PM
Have had a lovely email from someone who knows a lot about sub drop. Thank you. I think a lot of my unhappiness this week is because I felt abandoned after a session. I feel lost now and a bit scared. I feel very closed down now. Maybe I won't have any more bdsm for a while. :/

1/19/2014 4:15:38 AM
Feeling very raw this morning. Lonely. Sore. When you confide in someone and they let you down what do you do? When you need care after a session and you don't get it, who do you turn to? I need help. I need care. Finding someone who wants me seems like conquering some huge mountain. I feel that I have nothing to give. :/

1/18/2014 4:50:57 PM

Can't see the point of looking any more. People only care about their cocks. Not their subs. 

 

Have had a bellyfull of this lifestyle for now. 


1/16/2014 2:30:41 AM
Totally fed up yet again. This journal is turning into a record of my moans more than something fun at the moment. Feel very alone at the moment. Feel like I'm giving and giving and the other person.... I don't think they have any care left to give. I don't want to sound spoilt, I'm very lucky. But maybe this can't go on :( Hurting.

1/15/2014 6:17:23 AM
In putting someone else before me, I sometimes feel very sad that my needs go unnoticed. It would be selfish to bring them to the fore at a difficult time. This is good for me. I should remember that.

1/14/2014 3:17:34 PM
I HATE sub drop. I cajoled Him and pleaded and wheedled and was finally granted a spanking today. So here I sit, somewhat sorely, hours later, and instead of feeling happy to have seen and served Him, got a spanking and much more besides.... I feel crap. Low. Rubbish. Down. Fed up. Selfish. Miserable. Well you get the idea. And it always happens. I space out, come back, we talk, all the usual things. But I don't seem to drop really until hours later when He can't realistically be around and I have life to deal with here too. I'd forgotten what these moments were like, thoughts clattering about in my head. Trying to concentrate and drifting in and out of the instant replays that will keep me going until next time. Wanting Him to know that I've dropped, and need a word, but knowing that I will bite my lip, be less selfish, and realise that I am here for His bidding, and not the other way around. xx

1/12/2014 9:20:30 AM
Someone told me I was a 'seven' where looks were concerned. Seven. That's average, right? I'm no oil painting. I'm probably a female Richard the Third. Seven. What is that? Seven out of ten? Seven of nine (like in Star Trek) ... No. I'm not quite a Borg. Seven out of five? Check that. That's Miss Universe! Hmmm. At least he didn't offer to give me one. Depressed and ugly. I need a thorough going over. With a cat o'seven oops... nine tails. :0

1/12/2014 5:49:35 AM
I know a sociopath when I see one. :(

12/23/2013 2:40:14 AM
How many times do you hear the phrase 'not a doormat'. I'm not a doormat. I'm a strong woman with thoughts and opinions and I give myself to you because you are worth it. And then you treat me like a piece of rubbish. A fool. An idiot. I've been involved in bdsm since I... Well.. For nearly thirty years. I've seen most scenes. Heard most excuses, come across most Doms and subs and switches and love it and hate it all. I'm engulfed. But I'm not your piece of rubbish. Not your joker. Your idiot. I can guess. I know.... Why is it that men want a prize and then turn her into a nothing... Does a Dom want to own nothing? That's why the cycle of searching for Him begins again.

12/22/2013 4:03:44 PM
I won't go back to being the miserable sub always wondering when her Dom will want her next. I'm not a slave. That kind of acceptance isn't my nature. I want and need a nurturing Dominant. I accept there are times when being apart is necessary and contact is difficult. But when I see Him, online, and I'm not even given a hello... A how are you.... Then I wonder whether this is the right situation for me to be in... I need help with this :/

12/22/2013 3:09:33 AM

I feel like I haven't quite got the whole picture. 

 

Hmmmmm


12/21/2013 3:16:26 AM

So I met Him this week. It was the first play meet. Vanilla, in play terms. But the eye contact, the touches... kisses.... They all had so much more behind them. I gave myself to Him. I knew I should. Eyes lowered, but.... I can't resist a peek..... He has the most piercing blue eyes. Eyes that look inside me. Undress me. See.... ME... Melt me.... Make me give myself up. I did... Of course... No need for restraint. Yet. I know it's coming. Along with the rest. Just His voice is enough for now.... quiet whispers, but full of the same command I know I will hear more of. I know I cannot refuse. I gave myself up. My body had long given me away, swollen, wet, aching, throbbing.... nipples hard.... cunt... well.... without warning even to myself I squirted on Him, again and again.... lost in my own world where His hands play my body like an instrument. And I play His music like no other. Until next time....


12/20/2013 10:51:18 AM
So this week I had a potential Dom have sex with someone else. It weirded me out slightly. We were both seeing other people. But I had asked him to see me. And he refused. To fuck someone else. I just feel sad. Second. I don't want to be second. That may be childish, but.... I'm so tired of being unwanted. For once I want to be useful. Needed. Even if it's only for my body. To serve. I feel little joy just now. xxx

12/19/2013 1:16:27 PM
I will be starting my journal again. There is a Dominant man in my picture. He gives me butterflies, and serving Him and making Him happy ... completes me. I await His instruction.

12/8/2013 3:16:10 AM
I only reinstated my profile for one man. For his attention, to make him see me. I nearly left before and he got in touch but didn't want me. I've stayed, trying to find that man in someone else. It doesn't seem possible, there are so many submissive girls and I am not even sure what I offer myself. How can you be a submissive, with no one to be subservient to? I'm strong, but failing. :(

12/5/2013 1:24:41 PM
I don't want to be without a Dominant this Christmas. "/

11/24/2013 1:56:48 PM

I need a good firm spanking..... 


11/21/2013 4:12:08 PM

You were my friend. We shared something deep and meaningful - in another life. I don't know if you still read my profile, if you miss me as much as I miss you, but one of us had to say it, and I guess I should be the Domme. 

 

I'm always here, I always was. I made it. 

 

xxxx


10/12/2013 10:47:38 AM

Updated profile and decided to start looking again! I still love ageplay and yes everything taboo, but if there are any boys out there who need a Mommy as a sub or switch well I hope they find their way to me... along with a nice Daddy to look after me xxxx


8/28/2013 4:19:06 AM
Confidence taken a massive knock. Thank you. I've learnt from this experience, trust no one. Let no one in. Short and sweet, a fool I am still.

7/11/2013 8:29:46 AM

So life is very different for me now and I am in a much happier place even if my body lets me down sometimes health wise. I thank God for what I have and enjoy the life I have been given and am amazed at the difference time has made. BDSM in my life would be wonderful, but I can find play always, and the best things are always worth waithing for. i might even start writing about my experiences again. :)

 

E xxx


6/1/2013 11:52:12 AM
I feel like I need to he taken and used hard.... By someone experienced, dirty.... deviant.... sadistic..... Maybe this is better just in my head as I masturbate, I can find dozens of people like that.... but to trust them with my naked body and soul?

12/7/2012 4:26:46 AM
The lyrics of the GnR song "Sorry" are a masterpiece. Like the whole album was a journey of extreme expense. But to be able to sing these lyrics at someone with such venom? Well. I suppose for the rest there's Mastercard.

12/5/2012 11:35:18 AM
Why does no one email any more? Why does everyone want to exchange msn or yahoo the minute you meet? Email me ffs. I'm not showing you my tits until there's a new Labour government in.

12/2/2012 8:45:45 AM
Pissing me right off that I can't write anything meaningful in my journal. "(

11/11/2012 5:55:58 AM
Submission isnt about weakness. You only have the control that you are given.

11/7/2012 2:16:54 PM
Sorry folks but my journal has been quiet lately and will remain so for the forseable future. I have some contact on here from someone I know in real life, who wasn't entirely open about their identity.... And knowing that they know who I am, see me daily, and have such personal info about me has freaked me. I want to be here but right now I am so stressed.

11/5/2012 12:24:17 PM
Today has turned into a really horrible day. I wish people would be fucking honest.

10/14/2012 10:58:00 AM

Kind of funny how people think bold type and capitals makes them Dominant. 

 

Apologies for being so very Victor Meldrew over the past few days. Comes of having no outlet for my submissive tendencies. 

 

I'm sure a bit of period drama a la Downton Abbey tonight will calm me down. 

 

 


10/13/2012 12:40:16 PM

 

 

Gym kit on... CLEAN gym kit... running on the spot... BEGIN.

 

Today I received this email, from someone I don't know. No introduction, just that. 

 

Just goes to show what a lot of utter asshats there are on this site these days. 

 

 


10/13/2012 4:35:20 AM

So this new guy to the site sends me an email and asks me, without even introducing himself, if I have had my urethra stretched. 

 

Now I talk about a lot of watersports and the kind in my journal, but public property I ain't, and I do like an introduction before folks ask me personal sh*t and all. 

 

So I told him so. POLITELY. Which is pretty good for me. 

 

He emailed straight back and said he thought my attitude stunk, he didn't appreciate my comments, and for that reason was blocking me. What a friggin' PRINCESS!!! Given the content of a lot of the emails flying around this site, how long are you gonna last buddy???

 

 

I know the difference between Dominant and domineering and so do all the real subs on this site. 

 

Good luck. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. 


10/12/2012 2:46:06 PM

Decided to cut my losses and give up I think. Sad that I couldn't ever find someone here. Will check the boards, keep in touch with friends....but, I'm done. I can't put myself through this when no one wants me :(. E x


10/10/2012 10:31:36 AM

I just want to thank everyone who has taken the time to message me and say nice things just lately. Mostly people are still either too far away or taken and just writing to wish me well, but it's lovely just the same. 

 

I am terribly frustrated though..... I do SO want to serve... to make a connection with someone and make them happy, it feels like I am only happy when I am pleasing someone else.

 

:/


10/8/2012 4:19:06 PM
Not really attracting anyone here - um, not real sure why. I can meet, cam verify, and want real life, not cyber. I guess I just can't be to anyone's taste. A few more days and I am giving up for a while - still feeling useless after my last play date anyway. :(

10/6/2012 12:00:06 PM
Have been thinking and thinking since seeing Roger the other day. Have decided that he doesn't treat me like a true Dom would, so after our meets I don't feel the emotional connection I need for it to work any more. So I am going to say goodbye to those playdates for now, and concentrate on finding a real Dom to take me. In the meantime I will try to provide some fun masturbation stories, I hope!!! E xxx

10/6/2012 12:00:04 PM
Have been thinking and thinking since seeing Roger the other day. Have decided that he doesn't treat me like a true Dom would, so after our meets I don't feel the emotional connection I need for it to work any more. So I am going to say goodbye to those playdates for now, and concentrate on finding a real Dom to take me. In the meantime I will try to provide some fun masturbation stories, I hope!!! E xxx

10/4/2012 8:10:31 AM
Today was Roger Day. And it surely was a different one today. Usually we stay in the home or drive out to the woods or some place where he has something arranged. Today he took me shopping dressed like something from The Porn Channel. No panties. Short skirt. Heels. Stockings. No bra. Low cut tight blouse. Nearly see thru. I was dying. We went for coffee and he sat me in a stool at the window and told me every time a nice guy came by to open my legs because I was a dirty slut. I needed the toilet so bad after two cups of americano but he wouldnt let me go. Finally he let me go down to the washrooms, but came in with me.... Of course everyone saw. He closed the door. Bent me over the toilet and fucked me hard. He opened my blouse, slapping my tits hard, and pushing them onto the dirty seat.... My face..... I could smell rank piss. I was desperate to pee too. Finally he came on me... Over my swollen cunt and arse... I was dribbling pee at this point..... He pushed me onto the seat.... thrusting his fingers into me and demanding that I beg to cum.... like a dirty whore. I begged. And begged. Eventually he let me piss.... All over his hand and my legs... before letting me suck him clean. He waltzed out and left me there feeling like a dirty used whore. I had loved it and hated it. I just dunno if I want Domination like that any more.

10/3/2012 5:54:19 AM
It really concerns me where all these new "Mr Greys" are going to learn their actual skills before practising them on a willing submissive. I recently had the joy of meeting someone genuinely new to the lifestyle and willing to learn, from all sources available, yes, even us subs. *cough cough* I was recently approached by a Dom with no experience at all who wanted to use canes crops floggers, gags, and to fist me. He described that being a Dom was like being a kiddy in a sweet shop. I fear for the young girls who come here, for the women who show up here because its the only place to get male attention for themselves. Value yourselves more ladies. FFS.

10/3/2012 5:39:10 AM
Re: my journal entry of the 28/9. Spent ages chatting to some dim asshat yesterday, then he asked me to chat on skype cos the chat function on here is rubbish right now. So. There I am on skype, happy to cam verify, and shocker, he doesnt have a cam! But please please please can he see me. Now who is the Domme and who is the bitch? I teared into his nutsack for wasting my time and went back to researching pussy pumps. Some people!

9/30/2012 2:50:32 PM

This place truly has it's ups and downs. You can waste ages chatting to someone who seems like a match and one email shows it all up to be words, just another fool fooling you..... And you just end up feeling incredibly stupid again. 


9/28/2012 2:15:02 PM

Apparently I am on some kind of list of subs who wont confirm that they are a female.

 

*deep breath*

 

Thats fine. I wont go on cam for any asshole that asks after five minutes of chat. If that puts me on any list then so be it. If we get along, its going somewhere and you arent after a quick wank or a pic collector, I am happy to cam here, on skype, or otherwise.

 

I can swap pics and chat on the telephone too, given that I am a real woman. Ive had Doms from here. I can provide a reference from here. I have people on this site who know I am female, and I dont give a gnats crap if you think otherwise.

 

I have knocked back dimDoms from here and if they have taken offence and got their panties in a bunch, so be it. Of course I must be a guy or I would show em my cunt straight off, right?

 

And if you are a Dom and you believe crap other people write, on a site like this.... without finding out for yourself.... Not very erudite, and not really showing good leadership skills, is it?


9/28/2012 2:15:00 PM
Apparently I am on some kind of list of subs who wont confirm that they are a female. *deep breath* Thats fine. I wont go on cam for any asshole that asks after five minutes of chat. If that puts me on any list then so be it. If we get along, its going somewhere and you arent after a quick wank or a pic collector, I am happy to cam here, on skype, or otherwise. I can swap pics and chat on the telephone too, given that I am a real woman. Ive had Doms from here. I can provide a reference from here. I have people on this site who know I am female, and I dont give a gnats crap if you think otherwise. I have knocked back dimDoms from here and if they have taken offence and got their panties in a bunch, so be it. Of course I must be a guy or I would show em my cunt straight off. And if you are a Dom and you believe crap other people write, on a site like this.... Without finding out for yourself.... Not very erudite, and not really showing good leadership skills, is it?

9/28/2012 1:56:21 AM

So what have I been up to recently play wise? Well I still haven't found a Dom, it's getting harder with all the influx of new guys who have read "50 Shades" and now think they are an expert. How to tell, huh, until you have wasted time and effort. Starting to piss me off!!

 

That being said I did get a rapport going with a vanilla who wanted some Dom experience and was honest about it. (not from this site).

 

He popped over, and as usual I was instructed to have a full bladder for the session. He was a great first timer, spanking my bottom through my panties, ripping them down and spreading my legs to get a good view of my glistening holes and aching twat. And boy how was it aching for his cock and from the slaps he gave me.

 

I had to beg.... Really beg.... For even one finger. My cunt has never so much appreciated the feel of one finger inside me..... Down to the knuckle.... Rubbing my clit against his knuckle as he pulled my blouse open and milked my tits. All the time whispering what a dirty little girl I was. I knew it. I was on the edge. I dunno why.

 

He made me undress and slapped my breasts and pinched them until they were raw. He clamped them, and pulled the chain between the clamps to make me cry. Still I couldnt sit still from pleasure and my cunt was throbbing for release and he knew. I could see he was hard through his trousers. Eventually he could see I was bursting to pee.... And led me like a dog with the chain to the toilet.

 

He made me sit on it, legs wide apart, and rubbed my cunt, but still no peeing. He made me take out his cock and suck him promising that when I had done a good job he would let me pee and cum. I did the best blowie ever...... Swirling and licking the purple head of his swollen member while he milked my tiny breasts. I ran my tongue up and down his shaft.. He must have been 8+ and I was dying to feel it between my legs and inside my aching pussy....

 

SuddenlyI felt his balls tighten and a huge mouthful of spunk was all over my face. He rubbed it in saying what a good girl I was.... He rubbed it on my breasts... Taking hold of his cock he told me to open my legs wide..... I did... Without thinking... And suddenly felt the hot wet spurt of his own piss on my now dripping holes. I couldnt hold any more and my hand went to my cunt as my piss started to flow by itsself and I begged to be allowed to masturbate.

 

He kept his word, watching as I frigged myself, then put his wet, spunk covered cock in my mouth to be cleaned as I fucked myself hard, cumming and spurting all over the bathroom floor. I had barely stopped shaking before my face was at the floor cleaning up my mess... his one hand on my neck.... his other hand now exploring my ass. 

 

The day ended with him going down on my pulsating cunt, giving me more orgasms.... And filling my arse with a small plug which I was to wear till our next chat online.

 

So I guess all beginners arent bad. He was fun to play with, genuine, honest, reliable.... but not as harsh as an experienced Dom, and it was play, with a guy from a distance, whose circumstances aren't right, so no real chance of a proper loving Daddy or Dom arrangement. So my search for my Dom, my Daddy, goes on. X


9/26/2012 2:53:28 PM
I just want to say that I have not read, nor will I ever be reading this Fifty Shades of Shite stuff. The first time I got tied up and spanked by a "Daddy" was.... well lets just say the internet wasn't invented back then, Christian Grey was having his arse crack used as a toast rack at boarding school and the UK was in the depths of the last recession. Thus I will be giving this sad excuse to dust down the actors from Twighlight one huge bodyswerve and sticking to real bdsm. If anyone still does that?

8/26/2012 5:06:30 AM

So I haven't been up to much lately... working hard after a long period off sick. Have been 'cleaning' for Roger again... as I still have that submissive need in me and no Dominant man in my life. 

 

Have been used, mostly naked apart from little girl panties, for cleaning duties, made to hold my pee in throughout.... then paraded to whoever he has had there at the time, usually another guy in his sixties called Tony. They both like to wank and watch me as I get more and more uncomfy and full of pee..... then when cleaning is done I have to suck them in turn while they watch porn.

 

They do their uptmost to make me piss, squeezing my belly, fingering and fisting me, ramming me with a vibe...... but dont allow me release until they have cum, usually all over my face or tits. 

 

if Rog isn't happy with the cleaning I have to squat in the garden to relieve myself.... then, if I beg, he might allow me an orgasm. Sometimes I can't help it and just cum as I pee.... for which I get cropped on my pussy afterwards. But if I beg he will let me rub my clit, sometimes out there in the garden, sometimes back in the house, in the window,  sometimes he will fuck me on the kitchen floor like a dog. 

 

I want to get away from him but I cant... I need, I crave the use.... I need a Master, a Daddy, but until then I have to have this for the release I need. 

 


7/26/2012 6:04:35 AM

Hot day, hard nipples...... hand drifting  down my panties to massage my swollen, wet lips inside my panties. Bulging clit throbbing all the way. Bus rides home can be so much fun with little old men watching !!!


7/3/2012 2:58:56 PM

We've had visitors this evening but I've been thinking all night about being submissive to an older Daddy.... and it's been getting me really wet. All night I've been holding in my pee, wriggling about on the sofa, going to the kitchen to get drinks and using it as an excuse to put my fingers onto the gusset of my panties and rub gently.

 

By 10pm when we settled with drinks and a snack I was soaked and swollen, cunt lips aching. I really needed a release. 

 

I excused myself to the bathroom and hardly had the door shut before I was rubbing my lips through my wet panties. I needed a hard, dirty release.......

 

I pinched my nipples and rubbed my cunt hard, thrusting fingers into myself until I could feel it cumming...... I started to slap my cunt hard and dug my hand deep into my hole as I squirted onto the bathroom floor. 

 

I took off my panties and mopped up the mess, then put them back on...... cunt aching and dripping inside the cold wet material. 

 

One of our guests was waiting outside the bathroom door as I openned up to leave. He kindof looked at me funny. 

 

Just for a second I imagined what would have happened if he had come into the bathroom and found me there, squatting, cunt wide open, hand jammed in there, panties pulled aside, titties hanging out. 

 

I blushed and wondered if he heard anything, and hurried back downstairs, juices dripping down my leg.


7/2/2012 11:07:41 AM
Still seeking that special Daddy to care for me and play special games ;-)

6/4/2012 9:31:02 AM
Went for a walk in the sun today with a very full bladder. Taking a short cut back home I really needed to go pee... ( knew I would) so I hid down behind a wall on the side of the path, squatting, panties down.... pee gushing out over my legs, onto my pantie gusset, and trickling down all over the pebbles I was squatting over. The sun was so warm in that one spot, and no one was around, and my cunny was so swollen and hot from walking with a full bladder, that I couldn't stop myself touching. Thinking back to the old guy I cleaned for, being bent over, made hold it in until my piss splashes out over his cock and his hand as he would spank and finger me. I came so fast, gushing on my hand, then pulled up my panties tight over my aching lips, and ran home all the way.

4/10/2012 10:47:56 AM

I wonder who has the biggest block list on here. 

 

I look at mine and think it must be tiddly compared to some people. 

 

*blushes*


4/10/2012 8:43:33 AM

teamviewer?

 

Has about as much point to it as the Government's pledge that "we are all in it together"

 

Unless I can take over George Osborne's computer and rewrite the next budget, forget it.


4/10/2012 6:38:30 AM

do worn knickers make every man aroused!


4/3/2012 11:35:01 AM

why are there more genuine bdsm'ers on swinging sites than on here. 

 

and I can even find people interested in women my age. 

 

and not so many trolls. 

 

magic.

 

 


4/1/2012 4:35:38 PM

Oh the barage of Doms that want me to me  *ONE* of their subs...... continue.

 

Grow up you narcissist cunts. I want one Dom not some fat bald twat who lives in lala land expecting girls to fall at his feet because he has a dripping cock. 

 

FFS. 

 

I'd rather fuck girls for the rest of my life or Domme sweet sweet subbies who at least know how to look after their own.


3/8/2012 6:42:20 AM

The Doms on this site are a joke. I should enjoy being someone's second sub because I'm never going to get a Dom of my own?

 

Fuck off. 


3/8/2012 5:29:31 AM

I keep getting so aroused about peeing in public and wetting my knickers. I'd love to be someone's little girl right now and get spanked for wetting my school pants.

 

My cunt is so wet and swollen, driving me crazy....


3/3/2012 3:37:17 PM

Always makes me cringe when a Dom younger than me calls me "young lady" like I am a five year old standing in front of him. This is usually followed by some comment about me needing my arse spanking or needing some form of control. (which I do, but I don't need el patroniso to do it).

 

Gees where did ya get that handbook on how to be a patronising twat from?

 

I am not the Sex Pistols and you are not Malcolm Maclaren. I don't need you feeding through my brain to have an opinion or to function. 

 

So sod off unless you want to know me, not some doll. 

 

Cos the only doll I'll remind you of is Chucky. 

 

 

Hahaha x


3/3/2012 2:48:26 PM

Why do you keep stalking my profile and emailing me now that you have a sub?

 

Is she not enough for you? Stop emailing me please, what's done is done, you chose what you wanted, don't try and keep up with me now, it's not fair on anyone. 

 

It was you who didn't want me, remember?


3/3/2012 2:20:58 PM

Chatting in sex chat again on another site. Ended up talking to a 60 yr old sub who really made me horny! He talked to me so nicely about lapping at my cunt and suckling my nipples, I got so wet, right through my panties, my nipples were like bullets when I rubbed them. 

 

I let him wank for me and after we finished our conversation I made myself cum so hard, my cunt was so swollen, just like he had really been down there.

 

I need to be owned, this body needs some control!


3/2/2012 2:43:32 AM
Wow. I got blocked by some guy I've never talked to. He looked at my profile, I liked his pic. I wrote a note to say so. Why would he block me? I dunno. What do I do wrong? I really miss having a Master "/

3/1/2012 5:10:43 PM
It's times like this and nights like this that I sure miss having a Master to talk things over with. I miss the kindness, the care and the love of another human being. Being truly alone is a very hard place to be.

3/1/2012 3:57:20 AM
Meh. You made your choice and you have your sub. I was interested, but now Im not.Stop stalking my profile. I'm not interested in Doms who have one sub and then cant keep their eyes off another. Shouldnt you be training her?

3/1/2012 2:05:04 AM
Thinking of changing my profile back to switch as I have some Dominant urges. Thing is - would this stop Doms being interested in me? Would subs take me seriously? I have only played before as a switch, never had a relationship and I just wonder about being taken seriously by either D or s as one.

2/27/2012 1:46:44 PM
Think I prefer Dom men who are older, preferably over fifty. :)

2/27/2012 10:21:15 AM
Aroused. Been chatting in sex chat rooms. Soooo wet. Need relief.

2/26/2012 3:49:37 PM
Updated profile. :)

2/26/2012 1:54:41 PM
Wow this place is getting so dull. Unless you are prepared to be beaten to death by a nineteen year old jock or pay some dumbass bitch for a mouthfull of abuse it seems like collarme is in dry season.

2/26/2012 10:30:14 AM
Huge turn off : fifty year old men who talk in text speak in an effort to be cool and "with it" Talk normally for heavens sake. And I might actually be interested. :(

2/25/2012 2:45:49 PM
Swingers make me want to vomit. Please stay away from me. Gratuitous sex is not bdsm.

2/19/2012 9:42:17 AM
Changed profile to reflect the real me. Much better. :)

2/18/2012 3:33:55 PM
Duh. If you send me an email saying "Reply if you are interested" and I don't reply, that pretty much means "no thanks". So you write to me again, asking if I am going to reply to your first email - and I say no, because I wasn't interested. I was doing what you told me to do. So then you write again, and berate me for being bitter. It's pretty simple. I was following YOUR instructions. I do retain the right to chose who I am into without it being an issue of being a dried up bitter old woman. I simply didn't see anything in your profile or email that enticed me. I'm sorry your ego can't handle someone not falling at your feet.

2/15/2012 5:00:52 PM
What has less worth than a stupid whore cumpig, deformed and beaten by her husband? An 18yr old Domme. Where did you learn your skills? Monitoring milk or handing out exercise books for Sir? Your skills arent worth jack shit - just like your toilet mouth. You are just a pathetic little troll girl who has nothing better to do between classes. If you genuinely wanted to talk about my journal why not mail me. But you havent got the guts for that have you? Cos you arent a Domme. You just think bullying someone weak is fun cos they wont fight back. Well hell, dead in the head, I noticed the way those girls down in Memphis made you into a mincemeat parcel and fed you to the cm dogs when you insulted them. You want to concentrate on yourself instead of running your mouth, you aint so much toxic as necrotic. Reply all you like fuckdoll, you are ignored and blocked. I dont want to see that scrawny ass on my screen ever again.

2/15/2012 1:31:54 PM
Seems to me that some people have nothing better to do than bully other people through their journal entries. If you have a problem with me why not email me, or is making a fuss in front of others to make yourself look big all you are good at? Scratch that.... I follow your journals and know you are more worthless than I am.

2/15/2012 9:55:26 AM
What can a sack of total shit expect on Valentines? What I got really. Nothing. From anyone. Not a glance, a look a care. In some ways I wish I was owned and loved and cared for, but in others I realise that is all lies and fantasy... Dominant men want sex and abuse and a whore to beat and destroy far more than they want something to nurture and care for.

2/9/2012 1:28:41 PM

Still feeling like a stupid worthless whore. 


2/7/2012 10:34:38 AM
Does anyone else want to pretend they are interested in me, get all the gory details of my life for wank material then remind me how pathetic I am by talking about me behind my back? Was it a good chat up line, discussing my shitty life? Wanker.

2/7/2012 8:57:59 AM
Another one bites the dust.

2/7/2012 3:39:27 AM
Why is one person never enough for anyone?

2/5/2012 4:55:55 AM
Someone who at least appeared to be genuine passed by today and asked if I was faking what I had written. They hoped I was, because of how I am now. No. I'm not faking. I have a "Once upon a time" story. Like everyone. But mine went awry. Some were my choices, some were other people's and some were things in life that just happen. But now I am here. The feelings I have about myself are all real. The saddest thing is that when I wanted to find a caring owner to guide me in all of this, I was just told that Dominants dont care, they just want to use and throw away. The person who said this was right. Since I became what I am now, and accepted how worthless and pathetic I am lots of people want to abuse and degrade, rape, beat, torture... with extreme violence. People just want to hurt other people. They dont care. I made a fool of myself looking for anything else.

2/4/2012 3:35:10 PM
Profile updated to reflect the usless sack of shit that I am.

2/4/2012 10:33:22 AM
My abstinence over, Doms are now stepping forward again to use and abuse me. It seems that very few can discern bondage or sado masochism from purely having a girl open her holes for them to fill. Given that I am a worthless nothing, I might as well let my body be used in return for some mediocre bdsm in the hope that one day someone decent passes by - that or I run into someone who will end my pathetic charade of an existence forever.

2/4/2012 7:54:40 AM
Abstinence over. Back to being a useless whore. At least if I open my legs I wont be lonely.

2/4/2012 5:32:11 AM
Thirty five days abstinent. Depressed. Alone. It seems that you have to offer sex to get any interest here. Love, devotion, service - well all Doms seem to want are three holes to fill. Someone to use, not to care for. I was right, I dont belong here, I belong back in the vanilla world.

2/3/2012 3:25:30 PM

Sometimes I think being alone and lonely is preferable to trusting anyone. But it's hard. I want to be loved. And I want to make someone happy. But they have to want me for me. I guess no one does. I guess everyone just does want sex after all. 

 

I've learnt a valuable lesson about people :(


2/2/2012 3:41:54 AM
Still abstinent. Missed my opportunity yesterday to end it. Will continue for another month as a punishment.

2/2/2012 3:41:51 AM
Still abstinent. Missed my opportunity yesterday to end it. Will continue for another month as a punishment.

2/2/2012 3:41:47 AM
Still abstinent. Missed my opportunity yesterday to end it. Will continue for another month as a punishment.

2/2/2012 3:41:47 AM
Still abstinent. Missed my opportunity yesterday to end it. Will continue for another month as a punishment.

1/29/2012 5:07:57 AM
Twenty nine!! Can't believe I have denied orgasm so far. On we go! Two more days and I am going to pop! Hehe. I am still not sure how but I think there will be some edging, maybe I will use a men's web teasing site and just ad lib. I did hope a certain Dom would step up but... He must have His mind elsewhere. I won't ask. Today is easier, not quite so horny when I woke, but still pretty wet and kind of throbbing down there. My clitty looks so much bigger, I just want to touch it, but I can't. And so I carry on, I keep thinking of a Dom tying me and thrashing me, spanking, gagging, pinching my nipples, tying them up and making my breasts swell. Making me his. Then taking me. All of me. I can't wait for him to find me.

1/28/2012 9:47:16 AM

Day twenty eight and the suffering gets worse lol!

 

Woke up, wet between my legs and with a swollen clit that sticks right out between my lips. I can't seem to do anything to relieve myself at all. Been doing various chores and jobs to take my mind off it but it really is at the point of driving me nuts, and I know how men in chastity feel now. I would do anything to be allowed relief, or just to touch and calm it down. 

 

I've decided that I will wait until the first of Feb then allow myself an orgasm, then begin again. How I will masturbate I don't know. I don't have a Dom to guide me so perhaps I'll look at some tease denial sites online for help.


1/27/2012 3:17:27 PM

Twenty seven days and counting. Past two days have woken up horny as hell so think I may need to start doing some edging to relieve some of that stress..... especially if I want to carry on into February.

 

People are very odd and messages fall into two distinct catergories these days. Some Doms seem threatened  by the fact I am controlling myself and feel the need to swoop in and "take" control, behanve in a paternal manner and just generally belittle any self thought I have. 

 

Others are more encouraging, can see the reason  why I am going through this process of self cleansing and exploration and exploration and are pretty supportive or understanding. The female subs and Dommes who mail seem to fall into this catergory too. 

 

One person in particular shines every day for me and I look forward to their daily installments even if they are very far away. 

 

And so I go on. :)


1/26/2012 5:52:24 AM
I had an apology from the sub who pretended to be a Dom and tried to boss me about. His profile has disappeared. Thats made me feel nice. Better. I know lots of Doms arent real and lots of people try to bully others but thats just made my day brighter. I would still like a Dom. There is a nice one who told me that being a sub doesnt mean not being a woman, or being loved, or wanted or treated well, or getting affection and hugs. I want that kind of Dom, and then I know from this self control, from this denial, that I will have the courage to walk into the gates of hell for him.

1/25/2012 12:46:29 PM

One of the rude "Doms" who actually laid into me the other day is actually a sub!

 

I can't believe it. Thats all I'm allowed to say but I am pretty annoyed. 

 

Rudeness. 


1/24/2012 3:49:52 PM

Thinking tonight. I'm not sure my denial, unguided, unmolded, is making me more submissive or less. I feel like I am losing some libido, some interest. 

 

In the past I've switched, and now I look at the profiles of subs and wonder what it would be like to be loved and worshipped and carressed again, and wanted..... as a woman, not as a thing, but as a Domme again. 

 

Maybe it's the denial tricking my mind, or maybe its me learning more lessons about what I really need from the future. 

 

I cant recall the last time a Dom treated me as a woman, after all, and that galls me. 


1/24/2012 10:50:20 AM
Day twenty four to five. Abstinence continues. Desire waxes and wanes. Been a little tearful, need affection, miss cuddling and hugging, but Im not prepared to go down on a Dom just to get him thinking what a nice girl I am, or to get me a hug. I guess the type of person I am looking for will see more in me than a fucktoy. I have to hope that or this orgasm denial is for nothing.

1/23/2012 1:48:59 PM

Seriously you have to check out this guys profile *probablythebest* He reckons he is one of the best Doms in the country, and only subs so he can have a crafty wank later, no woman can control him.

 

Just goes to show what happens when the Computer Science teacher turns his back in class for a minute, heh?


1/23/2012 5:06:16 AM
Um if you were a Dom why would you post the same pic of you in a sub profile? Do you think people never look at other profiles? Are there no lifestyle Doms and subs here? Is everyone switching? I admit I switch. I prefer being sub, but there are just no good Doms to trust with my body, my mind, my soul. So now I abstain totally. Which is better. These are difficult questions. Someone said to me that it was better years ago, before bdsm became fashionable, for weekend kinksters, for making cash, for the wider public. I think they may have been right. At least you knew who you were talking to back then.

1/23/2012 1:10:18 AM
Had an unpleasantish exchange with someone over the past couple of days which is typical of why I dont want a Dom right now. A Dom, older gentleman, instigates an email exchange with me telling me he would be willing to control my orgasms and telling me how cruel he is. I told him I wasnt looking for anyone to do that, rather to get to know people as individuals and see what developed. He did ask my background, but I told him I already felt we wouldnt be suited based on the fact he lists himself as cruel, and just now, I really need someone caring. His final repost to me last night was to keep my hands off my cunt. Something I am quite capable of doing, having been abstinent for 23 days so far, with no touching and no masturbation. And no Dominant to guide me. I just wonder if the males locked in chastity on this site get such childish and churlish emails from so called Doms wanting to control them? Is it that the Doms cant stand the subs having any self control and self will at all? Or is it that we can do without touching our genitalia for longer? I want a Dominant in my life who is interested in me. Then in D/s, then in sex last. If you think it's all about getting kinky at the weekend and sticking your cock into something, please, keep well away from me. Ive learned that lesson.

1/22/2012 5:55:07 AM
Im aching today. I want to touch. To give in to myself. I wont. If I was in a device I wouldnt have a choice. There could be no play. I want to stay this way. Its for the best, reminding me there isnt anyone. To be controlled would be better I suppose. But the measure I use? So many people here just want their dick sucked, some anal, a quick release. To cum on someone's face. Oh yeah that aint bdsm. That isnt D/s without the rest. And so many dont bring all the rest. So goodnight Vienna, I'll control myself way sweeter than you ever could. :)

1/21/2012 4:27:39 AM
Abstinence continues. One minute Im kicking and screaming wanting to relieve myself, the next Im resigned to the nothingness of the promise I have made myself until I find the right Master. Doms try and chat to me, but its only the odd one who appreciates my situation - that I am looking for someone interested in me, and in bdsm, not just sex. One person remains, and leaves a mark on my heart. I feel broken, but who can repair me? Me.... alone, will take a long time I suppose.

1/19/2012 9:37:52 PM
He asked me why He should consider me. I couldnt answer. I don't have any worth, any value, I don't mean anything. I have nothing to offer except hard work, honesty, willingness, loyalty. Im not beautiful. Im not ugly, probably pass unnoticed in the street, like you'd want. Not overweight ..... and Im not lazy. Neat and clean. I know how to please someone. I can take pain. Lots of pain. And I have nice taste for things , as a good home maker. Yet he asked me why he should consider me and I just said nothing, feeling useless. And now the moment has passed and he has gone again and I am left again, clinging to remnants of the past, feeling stupid, and alone.

1/19/2012 8:21:54 PM

Im so ashamed. I'm just so ashamed I want something so badly but I dont deserve it. Im just a worthless nothing, a useless whore. 

 

I hate myself, I want to scratch my insides out. 

 

Why did I tell my old Dom how I felt, why? I'm such a fool, so stupid. He made me feel so tiny, so small. I'm so ashamed, I never want to wake up again.


1/19/2012 5:13:54 PM

Someone suggested an abstinence/denial website like this one that I could join for support. It was mainly for men but women do join. It was in chat and now I am looking I cant find it. Does anyone know the name of such a site? Orgasm control or something :(


1/19/2012 2:33:28 PM
A strange coincidence. I saw my old Dom today. Just online. But we dont move in the same circles, and its been nearly a year since I felt his hand on my shoulder, since he commanded me to do those tasks for him, since he held me in his arms when I needed him. He was my Texan. My Lone Star. I never knew what he meant to me until I pushed him away, and he was gone forever. I always thought it would be so easy to meet someone else like him, and I was wrong. I know its over, gone, past. But for a moment, when I saw him, saw all his messages to me again, and when he spoke to me, something danced inside my soul that has been far too long dormant.

1/19/2012 1:02:15 AM
Definitely keeping abstinent and not touching is hard work at times. Yet others I wonder if I ever want to touch again. I know now that I belong less and less here, I don't feel at home any more with the other subs and the Doms, well, how many real Doms are there who understand what submission is and don't just want a sex party? I don't know what the future holds, are there websites for people like me? Someone suggested munches. Or . But I doubt I would have the guts to stroll into a munch, and I looked at and just cant jump in Maybe I should try meet someone in vanilla again

1/18/2012 1:07:30 PM

Another day without touching, without ANYTHING. Mixed emotions today, starting to wonder if I want a Dom, if I need one, if I want to be involved in this lifestyle any more. 

 

It's only brought me unhappiness the past few months, not really bothered about the sex, can't find anyone decent to serve D/s wise. Some of my best experiences were as a switch, when I was in control. 

 

Maybe abstaining is good for me and maybe it is time to put this whole thing away after all. Don't know where this is going yet. Let's just see. 


1/17/2012 5:46:15 AM

Ok, so on the advice and instruction of a Dom here, I have now stopped touching, because I don't want to stimulate any arousal at all, or cheat. I wasn't edging or anything before, but this is going to be really hard, just doing the necessary when I toilet, shower and to keep myself clean. Even psychologically I already want to touch, in half a day!

 

I am such a wuss!!


1/16/2012 4:07:38 PM
Still holding out for my hero. In the meantime I am practising self control and abstaining. I haven't played since the start of the year, and am trying not to touch. I know girls dont practise denial much but its worth a shot, I needed love and control from a Dom, maybe I should give some to myself. I am still looking for the right person, but here I feel I am onto a bit of a loser, with men just wanting sex. I say men, I cant really call them Dom. So on we go. To the end of the month, at least?

1/10/2012 12:30:15 PM

I just love the Doms who are as nice as pie until you say no thank you, then they bombard you with nasty messages. 

 

If you stand up for yourself, of course, you are being abusive, and if you block them, that's childish.

 

Just remember, I'm not a useless no mark slut like you might be used to. I dont want you, grow up and move on.

 


1/7/2012 12:15:13 PM

apparently I have no right to expect a Dom to take me because I have a vanilla partner. I an just a worthless whore. 

 

I'm sick of the abuse here. I'm deleting my profile and going elsewhere. If anyone wants to keep in touch mail me. 

 

:(


1/7/2012 10:10:35 AM
Maybe I'm doing something wrong. I just get the idiots. Are there really no Dominants out there who want to care for their property any more. Do they all just want a dead in the head fucktoy? Maybe it's the end of the road.

1/4/2012 11:54:35 AM

Yesterday a Dom from this site who admittedly has less than 4 years experience of bdsm came onto my profile and sent me a number of unsolicited emails accusing me of being underage and a fake and knowing nothing about bdsm or D/s relationships and suggesting that I should close my profile down and do my homework. A Dom who is younger than me. 

 

I have met with several people from this site, spoken to more on cam and over the phone, and been a sub/switch for nearly 20 years. 

 

Yet still this man's behaviour has caught me at a low ebb and I am distressed - whereas I should realise that he is crossing the line between Dominance and abuse and should merely be ignored.

 

Until I find a Dom/me I am seriously considering asking someone to take me under their care and control so that I don't have to face these incidents alone. 


1/3/2012 7:56:14 AM

anyone here calling me their "lil girl" who doesn't come from the united states needs to be shot through the head with a cross bolt. 

 

you are not a frigging cowboy so don't try talking like one. not when you come from milton keynes, anyway. 

 

bloody ridiculous.


1/2/2012 2:04:25 PM
People on this site are so full of bollocks.

12/31/2011 3:25:43 PM
All I want for the new year is a loving caring Daddy x

12/26/2011 11:13:33 AM
What is it about people sending you messages - seeming pretty normal - then after the third exchange commanding you to kneel down and call them Master or not piss all night or chat in msn with them. Sorry guys, you dont own me until well, hummmm, I agree to it, so get bent.

11/26/2011 10:59:57 AM

I have updated my profile with my location, was getting tired of emails asking where I was situated. 

 

Please try to be within a couple of hours travel from where I am, I want regular, real time contact, with a genuine Dom/me, if there are any left on here :(.


11/24/2011 3:27:52 PM

family fun and taboo porn has left me really wet. squirted all over my bed. 


11/24/2011 10:42:11 AM

Had a little time to think and some time away. Chatting to a nice switch who is a very dirty boy, but have no desire to meet, we just chat about the lifestyle and 'help' each other cum...... !

 

So back to the drawing board. I cant stay a good girl, I really need control and someone other than me to decide when and how I get release, otherwise I am going to wind up cleaning for Roger again, I know he wants it, and now he has another young girl too he wants me to play with, I just feel like a total slut, and I want something different from this.

 

But it needs to be soon. My cunt is aching. 


11/10/2011 12:42:24 PM

Tired and need a loving Dom/me with some time on their hands to look after me. 


11/8/2011 10:08:58 AM
No, sorry. I dont want to be part of some stable of sex slaves or subs or lackeys. I want to be special to someone.

11/5/2011 1:46:17 PM

Have made up my mind to take some time out after tomorrow. Am fed up of Doms making demands of me and not really caring about me, so am withdrawing myself until I find someone who cares about me - not just wants to use my body. 

 

Tired and feeling low.


11/5/2011 7:10:32 AM
Think I might be going to use a young girl tomorrow. Eighteen. I have to be mother to her in front of R and his friend. So much for Sunday being a day of rest. I'm nervous. It's been so long since I've been Domme, and even then not to a girl. I'm scared, in a way. But tingling a bit too, like it could be amazing, or really upsetting, and I dunno which.

11/1/2011 8:27:51 AM
Feeling overheated still after this weeks play session with the guy I clean for. Want something spontaneous, need to be used again this week, still feel swollen between my legs and rubbing just isnt going to ease it. Would be really good to have a sub boy between my legs, licking me clean and making me gush on command.

11/1/2011 6:10:07 AM
Local local LOCAL I am still looking for a Dom/me to look after me and to serve :)

10/31/2011 11:02:40 AM
The guy I clean for never runs out of ideas. He had a friend over today - same age - and I had to dress up in a little vest and white panties and sit between them. They took turns to explore me, lifting my vest, pulling down my tiny knickers, making me undo their zippers and rub their wrinkly old cocks. They wanked each other into my mouth until they came down my throat, then made me lie back on the sofa and masturbate by squeezing a cushion between my legs. Right after I came the one guys young grandson turned up. Fuck I was so horny I would have fucked him if he had been a minute earlier and he only looked just about legal age. Fuck. Right now my tits are so swollen and hot and hard, and I feel so horny still. My clitty is so engorged I wish that boy was sucking it.

10/27/2011 11:01:16 AM

Saw the cleaning guy today. He had a friend with him, on the sofa, both wanking off while I was vacuuming. Eventually they had me stop and took it in turns to use the hose of the vacuum on my clit, my cunt and my arse. I never knew vacuum accesories could feel that good! Every time I got close to cumming they stopped, I ended up with cum and piss running down my legs. 

 

I mopped it up with my knickers, which they then wiped all over my face. All the time I couldnt take my eyes off the wrinkly guy's cock... his balls practically hung to his knees. His balls must've been so heavy, he said he hadn't fucked a girl for 2 years. 

 

They kept slapping my tits until they were bright red and swollen, and eventually when their own cocks were dripping with precum, they forced me over an armchair, and used my cunt and arse roughly. 

 

I buried my head in the cushions and came, silently.... I know I wasnt supposed to, but it's been so long. I think they knew, but  I tried to gush and trickle rather than spurt..... so tonight I still feel like I want to cum hard. My clit is still engorged and my lips are swollen. My tits are sore, but I want more pain - clamps on my nipples, to be bound, slapped. Have someone tell me when I can piss.... to be fisted. 

 

Tonight I feel only half relieved. 

 

 


10/26/2011 10:42:43 AM
My cunt is aching and my breasts are swollen and rock hard. Been so long since I played. Damn. Want to be used, but for some reason, right now am craving the feeling of being held, cared for, loved, protected. Maybe it's time to quit goofing around and look for a genuine Daddy who wants a deviant little girl to look after. Maybe the chill autumn days and bleak nights are making my body cry out for someone to take care of it as well as use it for his pleasure. I miss being owned. I miss the feeling of thinking about someone else from the moment I wake. Of desiring them, and them only with every fibre of my being, in every moment. I've had an opportunity or two, and squandered them. Now I have to look forward and find someone. I hope against hope that they may be here.

10/10/2011 5:46:16 PM
Just got back from a meet with this older Dom who wanted to role play. He drove us to some service station on the motorway and took me in the gents toilet. It was scary really, I was worried about someone coming in. He got his cock out, it was hard, and made me touch him..... he asked to look at my breasts. I showed him and he looked and fondled them for ages getting harder and harder before suddenly grabbing me and forcing my head down to the toilet while he jammed his fingers into my cunt through my tights. He slapped my cunt through my tights - I wasnt wearing panties at his request - then shot his load all over my pussy through my tights. It felt so creamy and hot and dirty and I just wanted to cream myself right there too. I could barely stand as he dragged me up to walk back to the car, cum slowly dripping down my legs. I so wish someone was here licking it off right now!

9/30/2011 1:38:32 PM
Played again today. My first ever couple! I was so nervous, but they were nice people. He was late forties, she was early fifties. I to be their little girl for the day. I was given a nightie with a teddy on it, and told to undress and slip into bed in this spare room - it was all girly - I think one of their kids who had left. I was a bit nervous, and didnt have to wait long before he came in. He got on top of me, covered my mouth, forced himself on me.... we had prearranged this, and used me roughly. He told me all the way through it was to be our little secret. The force was stunning, my cunt was burning. I was glad when he grunted his way to an orgasm and rolled off me. I was thinking what the fuck have I got into? His wife came in..... she got in with me and just held me, cuddling me against her big breasts..... it was a new thing for me, nice. After a while she asked me how I felt down there. I said sore. She said she would rub it better.... and placed her fingers between my legs, on my clit, making it swell, openning me up. She pulled out a nipple and had me suckle, rythmically touching me... I started to feel myself give way, until I suddenly squirted on her hand. I couldnt believe it. She held me for a bit, I felt so ashamed, then she put me in the bath and we played together, washing and touching one another. Her husband came back at this point though, and made me dry off, and tied me to the chair while they fucked. It was surreal watching them. She was a big woman really, a bbw, he was skinny, big cock. It was horny. I wanted to touch my sore cunt, but they had tied my hands. When he had finished he made me suck him clean, and then pushed my face in her wetness. The taste was bitter, salty, sweaty, horny.... I could feel she liked it, I flicked my tongue for her and she came again. After that she cuddled me and let me suck her nipples again. It was nice. I wanted to orgasm but the man said no. I dont think I will play with them again. Ive got mixed emotions tonight. Coming down hard.

9/29/2011 12:02:26 PM
Been watching some porn that involves medical fetishery and play. Just suddenly have this desire to be involved in a Dr/patient scene and tied down and touched up, explored, examined and used. Want my holes opened up, then filled with either speculums or cocks or dildoes. Want a butt plug in deep. Mouth gagged shut. Titties clamped, or bound. I want to be cum on, then left with a wand rubbing at my clit until I squirt and hit the wall, dammit!

9/29/2011 11:06:41 AM
Went to clean for old guy today. He made me undress when I got there and dust, hoover and clean the kitchen and bathroom naked. He wasnt happy with the carpets so he made me get down on all fours, nipples dragging on the carpet, and crawl back and forward. I thought this was silly at first but it really made my teats go hard and after a while they were burning. He knows I want to be made to lactate and loves the idea of me having milky titties for him to suck. He got down on the floor and started milking them like they were udders with his hands. I swear I produced tiny drops of clear sticky fluid from my nipples. He made me leave it on there to dry. But oh my cunt. It was so wet. Throbbing, dripping.... I knew he would use me hard..... four fingers in deep, pounding me.... then, his thumb. Before I knew, the burning pain overtook me and his fist was turning and squeezing and pressing into me. I didnt want him to stop. I pushed back and forward on it, desperate, ready to piss, unable to ask permission, legs buckling, only him holding me. Pissing and cumming and crying. And knowing I would have to clear up the mess.

9/21/2011 2:47:15 PM
Just cant get the idea of suckling on a pair of lovely pink teats out of my head. I adore playing the little girl, there must be a mommy and daddy out there who want to try this......

9/21/2011 9:07:40 AM
Today I was offered the chance to serve a mommy Domme and her partner. Ive never served a couple before, they basically want a little girl to explore with. Sadly we cant connect, but I think the whole idea sounds really good, and would really like to serve a Mommy or couple.

9/21/2011 9:02:04 AM
So I'm writing my post about the latest task I did for the Dom I visit occasionally. He knows how I love to touch my cunt and play with myself... (I can waste whole days wanking and chatting online and on the phone). So he made me bring myself to the point of orgasm on the hour, every hour all day from 8am until 8pm. At first that sounds easy but after two or three times I was getting really gushy and wet. He texted instructions to send photos of my bald cunt with my wet pants pulled right up between my lips. I was dying at this point.... my heart in my mouth..... cunt aching and swollen so bad.... I was desperate to release, only just holding back. By 4pm I was getting sore, but kept at it. He instructed me to remove my panties for the hour and clamp my engorged clit... while I calmed down. The pain helped a bit, but it eventually get really sore, and I was glad when he told me to remove the clamps. My clitty got really big then, I could barely allow myself to touch it, but I was desperate to cum. By six he stopped me peeing and made me drink 3 pints of water. I was gagging by this point, I cant take so much fluid... I must have only managed one and a half..... I started to need to pee badly by eight.... his timing was so perfect. Again and again he made me rub my tummy. O wanted to explode. My cunt was so sore and puffy and red from being wanked every hour... and my panties were soaked. He asked me how I felt.... I told him, hot, sore, aroused... I really wanted to piss and squirt. He made me do one last thing..... that was so gorgeous.... it tipped me over the edge. He made me put a scoop of ice cream into my hot cunt to cool it down. And try and hold it there. I couldnt bear it. My cunt was frozen in a second, full of cold cream... dripping down, trickling along the seams of my pussy, my lips, bathing my swollen clit... soothing it. I raced to the bathroom and removed my jeans and stood in my panties in the shower. I barely touched between my legs before I exploded with cum squirting down my legs..... mixed with ice cream and piss. My legs nearly buckled. Im still horny thinking of it..... and I want more.

8/30/2011 9:14:19 AM
Just got back from a meet. Been a while since I did this, due to other commitments. Let him get me a little drunk then take me out into the woods, on a trail. Made me remove my panties and sit on this wood bench rubbing my cunt back and forth while he fondled my titties. I was desperate to cum and piss both together, when he finally let me it sploshed all over my legs and the floor. He made me walk back to the car all dirty, I'm sure he wasn't going to do anything but he was so hard by then he throat gagged me till I sucked him dry, while he rubbed my dirty arse and cunt. I wish I had a Master like that every day!

8/17/2011 1:48:28 PM
Met a guy today off line. Did some naked cleaning for him. He inspected my pussy and tits, and when I was done, he made me go over his knee for a slippering anyway. He stuck two fingers, well, it felt just like two, in my cunt, I was sopping, and shoved his thumb in my arse. Then he made me suck him off while he fondled my boobs. I was practically creaming myself when he told me to go. He was 73. I am turned on and ashamed all together. Now I really need to cum hard. "/

8/2/2011 4:39:33 PM
Ah I see it seems that if you chat to someone then decide they arent for you..... or worse still ... turn them down after an introductory email, that you are a faker and a man. The fact that Ive spoken to several people online and met some rt doesnt matter. It seems like if a Dom doesnt get his own way, to save face he kicks off and accuses you of being a guy.... why else would I refuse him? Not because he was a total dickhead or anything????? When I meet someone I click with I move along quickly to prove who I am. For anyone else..... they can just grow up. If a Dom cant accept when someone isnt into him.... maybe he isnt so Dom after all.

8/1/2011 1:09:15 PM
Sitting here titties clamped, cunt wet, clit engorged, desperate to pee... Leaking..... wishing I was being suckled, with a fat cock in my mouth. Will wet my panties soon x

7/29/2011 12:05:11 PM
According to enslaverofwomen I am fake and a man. As I enjoy being dominated by phone and given tasks, especially watersports related, I think I can pretty much verify within minutes that Im all woman. Either that or Ive had my plums removed and have perfected the husky tones of a gal in the throes of pleasure as she pees for Daddy. The next guy I chat to will be asked to journal verify me. I might like toilet play but I dont have time for crap from assholes.

7/29/2011 11:35:34 AM
Desperate for toilet, sitting in panties, skirt lifted up, grinding into the chair.... aching for release. Just peeing a teeny drop to make my engorged cunt wetter..... want to touch, to rub... trying not to, pinching rosebud teats instead, dreaming of being suckled.

7/26/2011 9:05:40 AM
I just keep thinking about being suckled and lactating, and how horny it would be to be hooked up to a milking machine whilst being fucked. :)

7/23/2011 10:22:14 AM
Updated profile. Online Daddy was fun, but want a real one. :)

7/23/2011 9:31:43 AM
I want to be somebody's one... ..somebody's little girl..... not just one of half a dozen sluts he is fucking "(

7/17/2011 5:13:35 AM
I wish I trusted someone enough to have another real life D/s thing.... but I dont trust anyone to look after me. Why is no one ever satisfied with one sub, why do they always need several "/.

7/17/2011 4:54:28 AM
Needed to play again last night. Left everyone downstairs while I went to the toilet to finger myself and pee. Let a few drops out onto my panties, just rubbing my clit, was so engorged, it hurt almost to touch. Fingered hard till I squirted down my legs, could barely stand. Stayed in my wet pants for the whole night.

7/16/2011 10:59:01 AM
Talked to same DaddyDom via text earlier. Really getting into pee play. He made me pee myself a little then go talk to the guests in the house, knowing I was wet underneath. I was so horny, by the time he texted to say I could touch myself I was dripping. He made me play through my panties and wet myself...... I came so hard, my clit was throbbing so much..... I just wanted His cock. I so need to feel a spanking right now... but I am loving pee play a lot and cant wait to try it outside.

7/16/2011 5:25:25 AM
Well blow me down with a feather. A switch with a wishlist on his profile. The same switch who wanted to Dominate me as a practice sub for the real thing. This is a joke right? This is April Fools all over.... right? Dr Who whisked me off in his tardis and took me to another planet where we tribute kinksters to let them practice caning us subs right?

7/16/2011 5:15:17 AM
I am not a fucking piece of meat!!!!! Some pillock just sent me a serious email asking to use me as a practice sub. What.. so you can hone your technique then find the sub you really want? I'm honoured. No... really.... lol.

7/16/2011 2:55:17 AM
Some Dominant men are such knob jockeys. That is all.

7/15/2011 6:55:57 AM
Oh lord. Apparently I need a 'server' spanking. Must be something to do with my computer system.

7/15/2011 6:27:38 AM
Just been talked into wetting my panties for a Daddy over the phone. As a reward he let me cum. Wow..... that was amazing.... thank you :)

7/14/2011 10:28:27 AM
I really need a spanking :)

7/14/2011 10:25:38 AM
Really hungry for some Daddy play... sitting on His knee arms round His neck, bouncing up and down... must be the sunshine :)

7/14/2011 6:20:08 AM
Wtf are eye contact rectacions?

7/9/2011 7:21:03 AM
Need play.... need to be used :)

6/21/2011 12:29:09 AM
It's kind of sad when you realise that most Doms just really use this place to get their dick sucked.

6/20/2011 11:30:12 AM
Ageplay is just so erotic.... being Daddys little girl, white cotton panties and trainer bra, ankle socks. Sitting on his knee, waiting for him to decide whether I have been bad or good. Oh Daddy!

6/19/2011 9:58:45 AM

Some of the Daddy Doms on here are so scary!!!! Borderline personality disorders or what!!!


6/19/2011 5:09:29 AM
Happy Fathers Day to all the hot Daddy's out there :)

6/18/2011 11:46:02 AM
*sits and thinks Daddy Doms are kinda great*

6/18/2011 7:30:36 AM
Today is officially horny day. Having fantasies about being a Mommy Domme to a very good boy. :)

6/8/2011 11:19:03 AM
It feels like, and I know..... that no one takes you seriously as a switch. They think that you are only in bdsm for the kink. That you dont have the heart of a sub or the skills of the Domme. For many that may be true. Many may come here and see this place as easy pickings for a leg over, but not want to close themselves off to one area of the market. They often use the switch name tag, sadly. As do the people who come here and enjoy the kink, but dont really know what they are...... But there are true switches. Who love to give themselves fully as a sub, kneeling for and obeying their Dominant. YET in another relationship at a different time, can be Dominant..... taking control, caring for, nurturing, teaching....... It depends on the time, the people involved, how they react together, many factors. But I do know that I hate people looking down on the switch label. Should I really have to morph and create a Domme profile because I want a sub right now....... should I have to lie about who I am? What start would that be :(

6/7/2011 12:28:33 PM
Sometimes you just see a picture of something innocent, yet so charming and beautiful it is stimulating in ways you might not have imagined. I want a sub like that. :)

6/6/2011 5:08:48 PM
Disguise our bondage as we will, tis woman - Woman - rules us still. Thomas More.

6/6/2011 12:42:40 AM
Has anyone got any clever ideas on how to ease the pain from a slipped disc that doesn't involve mind-altering drugs or surgery. This probably isn't the forum but it is seriously gettin' in the way of my life, work, bdsm and otherwise. :(

6/6/2011 12:20:27 AM
I'll be your Dixie chicken, You be my Tennessee lamb, And we will walk together, Down in Dixie land. Crash into Me :)

6/5/2011 3:40:57 AM
Ok. What the heck is it with guys calling themselves 'boi'?

6/4/2011 10:43:30 AM
Updated profile. Miss being Domme and want a new project ;)

6/4/2011 8:22:12 AM
I am getting a lot of really bad emails, spelt badly, poor English.... SORRY NIGERIA I dont have any money for Africa, I donated it on Red Nose Day.

5/22/2011 6:31:28 AM
Yes I like age play. Yes I want a Daddy. When the best someone can do is write to me saying "What age" I cant be arsed. When people send you one email then expect you to call them Daddy. I cant be arsed. The fakes and the wannabees who just put out for kink or for money or for power just ruin this all for everyone who does want a half reasonable shot at it. You get so jaded you pass the good ones away with the bad. But there are a whole lotta bad.

5/18/2011 4:17:43 AM
I played Mommy amd baby with this guy who I have been chatting to for ages. He was around and I was horny and he was into it. I like to Top from time to time and it was good. Only now the spineless twat has run away, what does he think I want to Domme him more often, become his Mistress, or is he ashamed at submitting to a sub? He sure as hell enjoyed it at the time. Wake up and get real, I dont want a piece of you, I used you remember. If you aren't adult enough to stay mates afterward, hokay. Im sure there are many more 'grown ups' out there, as well as a lot more like you.

5/18/2011 4:06:37 AM
"I'm eyeing you up and down from the shadows" Stay in the shadows, weirdo. Blocked.

5/16/2011 8:53:57 AM
Do I look like I give a crap what the timewasters on here say, think, or do? When I find my Dom, His opinion will count. I will do anything within my power to please Him. The few friends I have here, I look after them, friendship counts. As for the rest..... you don't mean squat, so save your breath.

5/15/2011 3:40:32 AM
No, Im not going to explain stuff I do in detail to give you wank material. Go watch some porn.

5/15/2011 12:02:32 AM
Spoke to someone kinda nice last night. Still got achey breasts. ;)

5/14/2011 1:26:27 PM
I reckon anyone that has to say they are a grand master extreme of anything is probably an insecure wassock who goes by that name more to convince himself of his ability than the subs.

5/14/2011 9:42:55 AM
Been talking to someone about pissplay and am now so horny for it!

5/13/2011 6:58:32 AM
No thanks, I woud not be interested in a 'dom' under the age of 45. I want someone to mentor and teach me who has more experience than me, not less. And as for all you kiddie doms... Whilst I'm sure you think that a bit of rough sex and forced oral makes you a big boy, go watch a few real Dom/mes in action, it takes many years to learn the skills and aquire the mind set of a true Master.

5/12/2011 5:14:59 PM
Sometimes you get mail from someone, and it's just a bit too patronising and you just think.... I really dont like you..... And you just cant explain any more than that.

5/12/2011 4:56:04 PM
Have just been reliably informed by a Dom here that most are just here for a leg over or wank material. *facepalms and suddenly realises that seeking bdsm on a bdsm site was REALLY SILLY*

5/12/2011 4:25:07 PM
God it's that time of night again when all the idiots who have gotten wasted have tripped in from the pub, licked kebab sauce off their fingers and fired up their laptops. *shudder*

5/11/2011 2:29:33 AM
What the hell is it with all these asshole dominants who expect you to fall down and kiss their feet or suck their cocks just because they say they're a Daddy dom. I'm not going for that, and I'm not calling you Sir, Master or Lord of the sodding universe until you step up to the plate and show you have real dominant ability, and that does not include being so insecure you have to squash subs the minute you see them with your supposedly divine authority. Keep out of my inbox will ya and stop giving the real Doms and Masters a bad name. I can tell the difference and you sure as hell dont interest me. Oh, and if, in your second email you propose taking naked photos of me too... you can get bent aswell.

5/10/2011 2:29:05 AM
New profile, will upload pics later.

5/5/2011 12:59:30 PM
I dont think I will ever find what I am seeking here. I think the site is a joke ... Good luck.

5/4/2011 2:47:16 PM
Tired and horny....... hmmm dreaming about rubbing my bare feet over some pathetic tiny cock and feeling that ooze of precum between my toes..... making you lick it up...... Seriously this sunshine is having an effect..... :)

5/1/2011 4:55:48 AM
Why do some guys have to try and convince you that they are genuine when it is totally obvious that they are wasting your time! Quit it.... none of you are special, I've heard all the lines before and I can tell a genuine guy by the way he ACTS.

4/30/2011 12:33:38 PM

He calls her the chocolate girl
'cause he thinks she melts when he touches her
She knows she's the chocolate girl
'cause she's broken up and swallowed
And wrapped in bits of silver


4/28/2011 8:03:20 AM
one of my favourite play partners was a Dom who was overweight. God, I used to love the way he used his chubby hands on my breasts, the way he made me rub his belly and the way he pinned me down with his immense strength, cos I am so little. He had such a wide cock too. Jesus I am horny for a Daddy.today...

4/28/2011 5:42:35 AM
Our brothers are in the rain. Enjoy pleasure while you have it, like sunshine on your skin. It is warm. Temporary. It will never last. Lasting happiness comes from having good karma. Just a little ole somethin to grapple with. :)

4/26/2011 11:27:20 AM

"I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them." 
— Oscar Wilde

 (The Picture of Dorian Gray

)


4/26/2011 5:09:25 AM
how is it that a good Daddy is really hard to find, but these sites are full of guys who want a quick wank and spank.... Please!!!!

4/24/2011 10:49:01 AM
Why is it that some Dominant's think that it is weak to show their feelings? Everyone has feelings, and it doesnt make you less of a person to show them.

4/24/2011 9:36:19 AM
Hallelujah!! He is risen. It's a great day to start over.

4/15/2011 1:49:03 AM
may be looking again.

4/5/2011 4:33:27 PM

Ideas..... are bulletproof :)


3/29/2011 4:59:32 AM
A fake ID works a lot better than a Guy Fawkes Mask. God is in the rain. :-)

3/28/2011 3:59:09 AM
Since when did I become the girl to come to when your Domme/little girl/make your mind up dumps you? Do I look like the fall back provision?

3/26/2011 10:28:43 AM
OK. So there are some nice people on here. Genuine. Kinky. I may be a fool to myself for staying, but all these sites have the same damn people on them anyway. Would still like to find that elusive Daddy figure, for some part time play, nothing long term as my lifestyle dictates otherwise. Someone genuine. Who will hold up to being vetted by another sub or Dom/me if needed. Someone who will respect me, and care for me, have affection for me, and be able to express all that through my use. Someone who wants my attention, affection, who will bathe in it, be aroused by it, and love me for it as only a Daddy can love his little girl. I know at least one person here who has found that, which makes me yearn for it more. So maybe. Maybe.

3/25/2011 6:59:40 PM

I was such a fool.?

?

I fell for a 'Dom' who said all the right things and made me feel special. He became my Daddy, and I his little girl. I let him use my body.?

?

Then we were chatting and he told me he wanted to make me ready for us by my uncles. To open my ass... stretch it. I was scared. He said it was ok, he'd slip me roofies so I wouldnt know anything about it.?

?

I met him here. I won't bother with his name, though you can get it from my posts if you want.?

?

The point is, I know I was foolish. But there are dangerous people here if you let yourself get taken in.

?

This man was neither a Daddy, or a Dom. He admitted not being a Daddy to me.?

?

I haven't used this site since and probably won't again. But his profile has disappeared..... I'm just relieved tonight I wasn't sucked in deeper.?


3/24/2011 1:29:20 PM
Well joining this site was a waste of time and I have met only timewasters.

3/23/2011 4:48:09 PM
So. Do I stay here and try to search for a real Daddy, or do I get the hell out now after PretendaDom? Hmmmm anyone????

3/23/2011 4:06:38 PM
Beware ShrewsburyDom folks, told me in all seriousness tonight how he was going to use rohypnol on me. Fronted him up about not being a real Dom, and all he could say was that he didn't know much about ageplay. For a Daddydom?

3/23/2011 9:30:06 AM
Even not hearing from Daddy for a few hours makes me ache inside... But... good news... He may allow me to have a pet to satisfy my needs and to be my cuck boy. I am a lucky girl to have such a good Daddy!!!

3/22/2011 11:01:21 AM

Total disrespect. Email me and asked me if i would play with him, if my Daddy agreed it. I said no, due to lack of picture, profile, politeness. He emailed back and said he was asking Daddy anyway. My Dom isn't an idiot, and whilst i would do whatever he told me on the issue, he respects me enough not to force me to submit to a pretender. 

 

If i want an Uncle, it will be a genuine one, thank you. :)


3/22/2011 5:35:23 AM
I miss Daddy when He isn't around..... lonely.

3/21/2011 2:46:55 PM
This slut is now owned by ShrewsburyDom. I remain here to chat and make friends only. Any Dominants interested in my use should now ask Sir first, i will not respond to mail without His permission.

3/21/2011 10:20:31 AM
Was a total cumslut for someone special today..... now I can't touch my nipples, my bra against them is so so sore, and my clit is swollen and hurting..... my cunt and ass hole are sore, but still aching for you Daddy, can't wait to be yours again.

3/20/2011 1:02:28 PM
I'm still thinking about lactation... touching and rubbing my breasts. Haha. I think I am becoming obsessed! I've even started having medical fantasies now......

3/19/2011 9:27:48 AM
I am suddenly bizarrely fascinated by the idea of lactating...... Having large swollen breasts hanging..... dripping with milk. I have small breasts, 34b. But it's a fleeting thought a girl can have I guess!

3/19/2011 5:58:20 AM
So I guess the search goes on. Master I've Got Potential must be out there somewhere!

3/19/2011 2:55:14 AM
Last night I was used, and it felt very good. It's been a while, and I don't know if He knows how good that made me feel. I hope I pleased Him too. :)

3/18/2011 6:20:24 PM
He's nice. He's Dominant, and I feel submissive. That's a good start. Wonder if i am the only one He chats to though... I doubt it!

3/18/2011 10:33:30 AM
Ok. I have a smart phone and whilst I can read your messages on here, writing back is giving me repetitive strain. So if I read your mail, but don't write back straight away, give me a chance! This is driving me crazy...

3/18/2011 4:57:07 AM
The object of my search is to find a Dom who loves His little girl, but who also like to take a bit of strap on or dildoe when he has done using her. There must be someone :)

3/17/2011 12:57:09 PM

Filled in my profile finally! Not uploading a photo..... but will gladly swap with genuine people. Want to point out that I generally fall into a more submissive role, but it all depends on the person I am playing with. 

 

I especially love age play, and being Daddy's girl, but love nothing more than taking a strap on to Daddy after taking my punishment..... just the way he likes it....:)


3/17/2011 10:40:31 AM
Saw someone nice looking at my profile. Hope they are one of the ones who take the time to write.

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HEARTSDESIRES
 
 Slave, Age:  30
 -, California
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