The most prolific days of your life won’t likely be easy. It’s not in the serenity of your comfort zone or the inactivity of a lazy day that drives greatness. Think about a day from your past that ended with a sense of satisfaction. It’s not a day when you lounged around with nothing to do; it’s a day you had more to do than seemed possible, and you did it. And yet we all want and NEED the peaceful day!! 

It takes a long time to learn how to NOT judge yourself through someone else’s eyes, but once you do the world is yours for the taking. If you’re thinking just like everyone else, you aren’t really thinking. Follow your intuition. Do what makes sense to you. Never compare your journey to someone else’s. Something nobody can take away from you is the way you choose to respond to what others say and do to you. Reactions are yours, how will this day forward be for you?

11 mins all it took to find out that Rock of Ages sucked! really? People paid to see this?

A gentleman pervert is a man who is well mannered, polite, and treats the fairer sex with the utmost respect.

At the same time, he has a size nine libido, and he's not afraid to show it. Treating women with respect does not necessarily include handling them with kid gloves. They are not made of glass. They actually want sex. Perhaps even more than you do. Don't be shy about the fact that you do too, or they'll think you're a nice guy but probably a boring lay.
It's also worthwhile to develop specific sexual preferences, or if you have them already, don't be shy to express them when women that posess them bring up the subject. A good example of this would be if a woman were to complain that her butt is too big. A good response would be that you don't think so, and that a curvy bottom is, in your humble opinion, the very height of female beauty. But like any gentleman, you should not lie. Especially about this. This is your sexuality we're talking about.

Of course it is bad manners to be too direct. Obviously, "Hey babe, wanna fuck?" is not a proper way to introduce yourself. Taking an interest in an already-ocurring conversation or starting with an unrelated topic is best. If your mind is dirty enough, you'll find enough sexual references to pick up on in the natural progression of any conversation to show precisely how sexual a being you are. Your sexuality is thus not something stated, but something exuded. It's just there, a part of the very fibre of your being.

When you follow these rules, women don't see you as being a nice guy who is desperate to get laid, they see you as being an interesting person in a sexual way. And if the chemistry is right, they'll want to find out more.

She paused a moment and thought of how it had begun, only a few minutes before. “I want you to do something for me tonight. I want your obedience for a task. Will you obey me for this one thing?” The words had burned on her screen.

She had paused, a lump in her throat. For so long, he had been kind and gentle, not at all controlling with her—more than once, she had even wondered if he was actually dominant. This message before her was out of character, and she was not quite sure how to respond. She thought but a minute and replied, honestly, “maybe?”

“Maybe is not good. I need a yes. When you are ready, not before. The task is not painful, embarrassing, or even overly sexual. It is also completely private… I am not asking you for pictures or anything like that. We will do it another time, maybe.” She read the words over and over, her breath catching in her chest… a spark of fear… and then she realized that, even then, her pussy had been dripping wet at his words.

“Ok, yes”, she had written. Then, after a moment… she dared… and added one word… that one word: “Daddy.”

“Good girl, and yes of course you may call me Daddy. Are you sure to be undisturbed tonight?…”

And, now, here she was, as he had demanded. Completely naked in her room… naked as she would be when she eventually knelt at his feet… naked for a man. She was shaking, though she could not be sure if it was from the cold or her excitement. She thought again of how he had responded when she had complained that she would be cold—that this task was not about her comfort—and she shook harder, barely able to control herself… this time from desire. How did he know?

And so, she assumed the position he had requested: kneeling, her knees spread apart to open her pussy open and expose that most secret part of her body… her arms clasped behind her back… her back straight so her perfect, firm breasts were presented to him… and her head bowed to the floor. She knelt there, thinking of the things he had said—imagining how it would feel to be his… to be owned… to be his most precious possession in the world. How she would please him with her body, but, as he said, this was not about sex… it was not about her body. It was about much more important things. She was beginning to understand those things—devotion, submission, service—though she had not yet touched them in her life and her experience.

He had instructed her to stay there a while, meditating on these things, but she became aware of a problem. Though she couldn’t believe it, her pussy was literally dripping down her inner thigh, threatening to soak the pillow she knelt on… she was perhaps more excited then she had ever been. She could wait no longer, and using this excuse, she moved to the second part of her task… she got in bed… buried her hands between her legs, oblivious to the wetness now running down her ass, soaking her bedsheets… touched herself, drawing pleasure from the molten center of her body… fingers on wet flesh, finding that spot… that magical spot… and rubbing, pressing, pushing… her gasps threatening to become cries and desperate moans… as she pulled herself closer and closer. Then, in heaving pulses… she came… and came… and came… and, for a moment, she was a perfect, timeless being of pure, ecstatic clarity…. for a moment she was lost…

A breath… and then another… and she gained control of her limbs, her breathing, and her mind… though not all of it… not all of it. Some little piece was now his… some little piece of her belonged to him… maybe, there was some little piece she would never get control of again… and, she realized…that was what she wanted.

One more thing left to do before she could sleep. She reached over, her arm still shaking, picked up her phone, and sent, “Thank you, Sir” before the night closed around her, and wrapped her in dreams.

It’s a lack of clarity that creates chaos and frustration. Those emotions are poison to any living goal.

Because we didn't come with a users manual there are no rules on the roles we give fear. Fear has the role we give it. We are able to empower or poison ourselves to whatever degree we want. This is the beauty of our design

Intent without dedicated action is simply not enough. Action without a clear intent is a waste. It is when these two powerful forces are aligned that the energy of the universe conspires in your favor!~

D/s is a magnifying glass. It’s a forty foot loudspeaker. It’s a projector with lumines coming out of its lumines. It’s a great horn. It’s the lighthouse in the dark. The hyperbole is the point. Within the frame of D/s, everything is brighter, more vibrant, has more power. Words mean more. Actions shout, not speak. The slightest touch can cause the most ridiculously out of proportion reaction.

 Words cut deeper, actions lost in the heat of the moment aren’t lost, because the wounds they cause become chasms in the landscape, something that is just a feature of the geography now, something that will always be there, something that just won’t heal. So you have to be careful what you do, what you say. Because what might cause someone in a vanilla relationship to have a bit of a huff could bring a submissive’s world crumbling down.

For the right submissive, Dominance can be best be exerted by overwhelming a girl with animal hunger.  He strips her, binds her, positions her, and drives into her, fast and furious, with one purpose only.  His pleasure - taken the way He chooses.  She in turn revels in this experience, because nothing makes her feel more like an erotic woman than to know she is the one He yearns for in this way.

This is hot, decadent, animal sex.  And it is intimate.  A dichotomy?  Not at all.  He shows her just how much she arouses Him.  And she feels just how much it means to be the one He chooses.

It is not enough for Masters to thrive on control; They must also crave responsibility and approach ownership with integrity, honor, honesty, common sense, and balance. There is no place in ownership for consuming rage, narcissism, viciousness, or other childish behavior. Ownership is for grown-ups.

Somehow they both knew the instant their eyes met. It was for half a moment, and yet they managed to communicate what one another was on the most fundamental level, and they just knew. He felt a smile tug at the corners of his lips, and her face was hidden in a blush. 

He finished up the conversation he was having and started to navigate his way through the crowd to where she was standing by the bar. She’d been alone when he spotted her, but now some sleaze was circling, trying to buy her a drink while she kept flashing glances his way. The guy was halfway through a sentence when he stepped in, positioning himself between the man and her, his lips against her ear. 

“The back corridor. Five minutes.” His voice was deadpan, with just the hint of a growl bubbling underneath. It sent a shiver down her spine, and as he moved away he was followed by hurled insults from the sleaze. She giggled, refused the offer of a drink in the most dismissive way she could muster, before pushing herself off the bar and sauntering the direction the man had left. That spine tingle was lingering.

He was waiting in the corridor, alone. He seemed to fill that massive space, even reclined as he was, leaning against the stark wall. One hand was in his pocket, the other resting idly by his side. 

“You took your time.” He said with a smile. It had barely been thirty seconds.

She blushed, dipping her head down before taking another few steps towards him. 

“Well I didn’t want you thinking I was too interested.” She didn’t look at him while she said it, staring just off and to the left, and so she barely saw him surge forward, one hand pressed against her stomach, the other finding her neck. 

He turned her around, pushing her up against the wall. The hand at her stomach moved off, pressed against the brickwork, as his lips found her jawline, devouring it. 

She could feel the fingers at her neck start to dig in, and her breath caught in her throat, just as her back arched against the rough cement, feeling it dig into her shoulderblades through the flimsy material of her dress. 

“Fuck.” 

His lips moved up to her ear again, and the fingers grew a little tighter against her neck, squeezing her windpipe. 

“Keep quiet. I didn’t tell you to speak.” The words swelled into her ear, and she felt that spine tingle again. Her bottom lip locked between her teeth, a safety measure against another slip up. 

Instead she just focused on that hand, the feel of it around her throat and the slight burn in her chest as she sucked in air. She squirmed, and he kept her still. She struggled, and he pinned her down. She couldn’t love it more. 

His knee pressed between her legs, grinding against her. She groaned, a deep, primal thing, and his hand came from the wall and slapped her in the face, enough to make it flush harder than before.

“I said quiet.” He growled, before grabbing her wrist and pushing it against the wall. 

She moaned, and grinned.

Just give me everything - that’s all I ask. Every thought, every dream, every secret, every gesture, every part of your body. Give me everything that you are, and sacrifice all that is not me. Let your mind break every barrier and every promise, and find that all trails lead to me. Let me be your good and your evil, your bright and your dark, your yes and your no. My hunger for you is such that I will not rest until I take all that you are.

I have written often about the mind fuck of BDSM.  Give me a strong, independent girl with a big, beautiful brain, an attractive body, and wonderful personal attributes, and I can be content for the rest of my life.

As for waiting, I wonder if enough Dominants appreciate the simple design principle of “less is more”.  When Dominating a beautiful, intelligent girl, I often place her in situations where she can do nothing.  Nothing.  No touching. No service to me.  No speaking.  Nothing.

And then I sit back and enjoy what unfolds next.  Had I taken the time to remove one or more of her senses, the experience is amplified.  She will fall into the abyss, and her beautiful mind will take over.  

Left in her own subspace, a girl will be transported to an intimate space of my creation, and her reality will morph into any thoughts or suggestions I might have placed.  She may be wetting, thinking of all the things I might do her next, or she may be writhing in her bonds as she hears a door open and close, after I have suggested (via an intense whisper) it might be time for her to demonstrate her sexual talents to others.

Less is indeed more.  She will lose sense of place and time, and she will be comforted only by my voice, my touch, and whatever sensation I wish of her next.

Let your girl wait for it.  And yes, girls, I can see you smiling and nodding.

My hand goes around your jaw like a tectonic plate shifting into place. Chin tilted upwards, just so. Thumb and forefinger dig into your cheeks, forcing your mouth open. And then I take it. Seized, usurped, captured. I steal the kiss in an armed robbery, all brute force and intimidation. 

When my lips press against yours, it feels like ownership. This is not a mutual thing, a back and forth to be enjoyed and teased, tongue battling against tongue in a playful duel. This is possession, something taken and something given. If this is the first contact, the starting point, it needs to be something that you’re going to remember, an impression that stays impressed. So you supplicate, and defer. You allow yourself to be kissed, because really, what other choice do you have? You submit to the kiss. 

I own that kiss like I own you. Completely, resolutely, absolutely. It’s a savage thing, with its own terribly beauty. It’s not refined enough to last, or linger. It is seized, and then it is gone. Softer kisses can come later, but right now you need to know whose you are. 

Mine.

 I desire a girl who is intelligent, strong, talented, and confident in her place in life and her vocation.  I do not wish her to give up everything to serve me - because that would require her to “lose herself”.  If she is the right girl for me - she will come to understand this instinctively, and she will serve me in thoughtful ways.

I do love service from my girl.  Sexual, domestic, and otherwise.  Not to the extreme - but intimate, sensual, and deep.  The right girl will take the time to learn my likes and preferences so that she can better anticipate my needs and delight me with the gift of herself.

One last note.  I never demand service.  Anything demanded or forced is not satisfying to me.  My goal is to motivate and inspire my girl.  If I am her true Dominant, I will create a burning desire to please. Over and over again. 

Vulnerability isn’t weakness. It’s about showing me the most private pieces of yourself, and that doesn’t make you weak. You’re still as strong as you’ve ever been. To me, you’re stronger.  

The moment of helplessness, where all you can do is wonder what is coming next… What pleasures or torments, what trials and tests… What to do, how to prepare? But, you’re helpless. There is only one thingto do. Submit. Accept your powerlessness and don’t allow your mind to trick you into thinking there is any chance of avoiding what is to come. Your control is gone now - be at peace with how things are, as you cannot make them be any other way. Cease to struggle, and find your freedom once again.

Dominant’s have strange, twisted minds, full of knots and winds, dead ends and false exits. They’re complicated mazes, full of redundancies and paths that don’t lead anywhere you want them to. 

But they have a core, if you can find it. It’s a tough old thing, covered in dents and rivets, but it’s still good. It still works. And once you’ve got it spluttering into life, it’ll start to burn. And it’ll start to get pretty hot.

It’s the kind of core that, once lit, isn’t about to go out in a hurry. It’s not going to fizzle and burn out, or just fall away into embers. It’s just going to get hotter, so long as you give it enough fuel. 

And that heat? That’s going to burn and burn, until it’s almost uncomfortably hot. It’s going to consume you, or at least feel like it could at any second. It’s going to make you want to shift away, but you’ve been so cold for so damn long that you don’t want to, because you’ve got no idea when you’re going to get heat like this again.

You’ve no idea if you can even get warm like this, ever again.

Anticipation is at the heart of what I do. 

It comes in stages. Waves of anticipation followed by the catharsis of the actual thing that you’re anticipating. It starts with hoping I might notice you, anticipating that mere flutter of my eyes resting on yours. Then, there’s the deathly anxiety of hoping that it isn’t just a passing interest, that there is the intrigue, and, far more importantly, the confidence, for me to come over and start a conversation.

Then you anticipate where that conversation might lead. Then where those first furtive flirtations might progress to. Then we’re there, past that, and first contact is made. Perhaps a hand on your knee, perhaps a finger in your hair. It’s not long then, before you don’t have to anticipate that kiss any more, you don’t have to anticipate the taste of my lips on yours. You just know. 

But that is you floating down a river of anticipation only to find yourself in an ocean, adrift, with no where to go but further out to sea. Where one earth do we go from here? Where indeed. So much to anticipate, dear girl. So much time to anticipate it in. 

You never stop anticipating. There’s always something new to explore, something fresh to introduce you to. And I can recreate any of these anticipations, evoke their memories, so that it’s almost as good as the first time. Anticipation is at the heart of what we do, it’s the pulsing beat to which we dance and weave. It’s the not knowing followed by theknowing that’s quite so seductive. 

Your wit, your wisdom, your experience, your insight and support. I value these things greatly. But there are times when I do not care for them at all - there are times when I wish to reduce you, to cut away all the distractions, all the complexity, all of your personality. There are times that I just need to use you - to reduce you to a warm, yielding, giving, mouth. Where all I need from you is a place to force my cock - and the desire to take it, to adore it, to stretch yourself to please it. There are times when I just need to fuck your mouth… and the rest of you does not matter at all.

I love intelligent girls.  Absolutely adore them.  And I find those who are passionate about reading and writing share a common thread.  They all yearn for an equally intelligent Dominant who can reach deep into their erotic “centers”, rip the pages from their fantasies, and give them a lifetime of living, breathing memories.

An intelligent submissive appreciates the beauty of the dance on the fringe.  She is a strong, independent, talented, capable woman in her own right, yet she hungers for a Dominant who can fuck her mind long before he touches her body.  She needs a man who can respect her as an intellectual equal but effortlessly assume his role as Dominant - the only man she would ever consider yielding to.  For her, this need is utterly palpable.  She can feel his hands through his words, his voice, and his instruction.

And herein is my secret insight.  Intelligent, gifted submissives are the naughtiest, sluttiest, hungriest girls imaginable.  They are capable of giving themselves completely up to the man they trust and respect, and going places they themselves do not yet know they are capable of going.  They are insatiable once leashed (note the irony).  And they hunger to experience whatever their man challenges them with and sate him with the gift of their bodies and their talents.

Strip her.  Position her.  Bind her.  And fuck her.

He poises his cock, and impales her - deep, full, and complete.  She cannot resist.  She cannot move.  She cannot control the duration or the intensity of this ravishment.  She can only feel the electric sensation of each thrust and the way it brings her body alive.

And she floats off the table, elevated by this intensely intimate, erotic moment.  Far from the day’s stresses and disappointments.  Free.  Blissful.  Liberated. Consumed by the man she craves.  

And loving every second of her dance - on the fringe of darkness.

I have not been Silent I have just been misdirected, however nver far. Hope you enjoy the thoughts I have has since last Journal posts!~ 

A Dominant is no more individual than a submissive. 

They are no more self sufficient, no more comfortable in their own skin. Their self confidence is only through necessity, rather than nature. They are not a single entity happy being a single entity. They cannot sustain themselves, completely, alone. 

The submissive is expected to be needy, because need is what defines that submissive nature. They’re allowed to be clingy, to cling, because the Dominant is there to be clung to. But the Dominant needs to be needed. That clingyness is a warmth in the chest, a reassurance that they are needed, and so they can take comfort in the knowledge that they are where they want to be.

It’s important not to mistake the role of the Dominant with the actuality. I act the way I act because it’s what you react to, what you needme to be. And while I am these things, I’m also not really worth that much without you. I need the submissive to be the mirror that I can see myself in, because you reflect me so very, very well. You reflect the best of me, and to let me see that forces me to aspire to it, and I become better for it. 

So no, the Dominant is no more self sufficient. We just make you think we are. 

Your opportunity to quietly contemplate and settle into your new home, and your new life. I can take all the noise and the distraction away, and just leave you with you. With so much stripped away, so much that previously occupied you gone, who knows what you’ll be capable of? Who knows what you may learn and discover? It will never be easy… but I’ll ensure it’s always worth it.

If you tempt me enough, I will own you.

There is no doubt in my mind - I have the wit, the wisdom, the insight and all the skill. If you cause my attention to fall on you for long enough, I will possess you.

I will find the secret paths in, I will demolish all of your blocks, I will cross all of your boundaries. I will become the deepest, darkest, voice in your head… In the final moments you will talk yourself into it, tell yourself that it is your innermost need, your most true desire - and I will lean back and wait whilst you make your final approach to me, and offer the sacrifice of what little of you remains unpossessed.

The full force of my attention can be a wonderful and terrible thing. You will never entirely recover from it. So be careful how you tempt me… be careful how you pull at my attention… be careful what you wish for.

 You can feel my body, you can sense my mind, you can hear my words… You have stepped through my door and you are lost to the world. So be silent and listen - let me tell you who you are now, let me tell you what you have lost now, let me tell you what you will do now…

The loss will burn for a time, but that will hurt will fade. You will not miss the things that are gone. There is comfort in simplicity and freedom in obedience. The fear will ease, your mind will go silent, and through surrender you will have perfect peace.

You always knew you’d end up just here, didn’t you?

She would learn to trust him, to rely upon him, to anticipate what he wanted from her. And like any master with his salt, he would reward her for her obedience. He would be exceedingly firm, but he would also be as fair as he could be. 

A Master is not someone who merely revels in the benefits that he reaps from the power and control that he wields over his sub. A Master is not just an automaton who emotionally doles out orders and watches with amusement as his minions perform his bidding. A Master is not a person who only relishes the benefits that his superior status entitles him.

Certainly all of these characteristics could and often do exist within a Master. He may be demanding and at times selfish. He may genuinely enjoy and even be aroused by the power that he has over a sub. He may be able to expertly control his emotions, issuing his commands and enforcing his discipline with stone-faced determination.

But a true Master, is so invested in his sub that he was actually in a way be a slave himself. He was a slave to his love her. He is a slave to his responsibility. He is a slave to the passion and the commitment. He is a slave to his overwhelming desire to protect his property at all costs.

Being involved with a man whom you perceive as being stronger than you, creates a rather delicious atmosphere of erotic tension, like setting up two opposite poles, and the attraction is powerfully inevitable. And the closer the poles in charge the higher the risk of repulsion. Keeping that energy high can require help and reminders in the form of explicit demonstrations that yes he is indeed more powerful.

It can also be incredibly liberating, knowing that this man, this powerful man, has rights over you. Not because it removes responsibility for one's own actions. Rather, it reduces the deep fear, that isn't rare in women, that a man may be weaker than she is, that it is necessary to constrain certain parts of herself or destroy him somehow.

So when a woman who craves male control finds it she can finally really relax, safe in the knowledge that he will be able to handle anything she has to throw at him and he won't crumble.

I believe that like in the animal kingdom we have alpha males and alpha females. People need alphas to lead and to look up to. The people who said it depends on the situation are right it really does depend on the situation.

The Alpha female, like the Alpha male, is strong, confident and like a queen bee, the workers will do anything for her. Alpha Males and Females seem to fit together and make an unstoppable force, a valuable partnership. Even in a situation where there is just an Alpha female and lots of females and no males these females will still look up to her and be in awe of the Alpha female, and vice versa for the male.

Think about any situation and you will generally find there is an alpha male and/or female. 

As an alpha male, I know what I stand for, and what I will tolerate. Most people have a set of core values; they pay lip service to when it suits them, but as an alpha male, I never compromise myselve.

One of the most impressive alpha male traits is my dedication to being true to myselve, and what I believe. I don’t allow social pressure, guilt, or shame to force me into taking actions that go against my core set of values.

People will always know where an alpha stands on a subject, but he will not care if they approve or no

Alpha male: Never puts the blame on someone else. He always faces his obstacles head on regardless of the odds of success. He never complains about problems, but aggressively works to find solutions to them. If there is something he doesn't want to do - as opposed to can't do - he offers no explanation.

Beta male: Makes excuses. Every time there's something he can't do, he has an excuse, and feels like he needs to explain it to those around him.

Alpha male: Doesn't give a shit what others think. This makes him very attractive.
Simply be confident about how others perceive you. You will act accordingly. Anyone who looks down on you is most likely jealous, and also not worth your time. You do not have time for people who are counter-productive to your self-improvement.

Beta male: Needs affirmation from others. Is obssessed with how others think of him.

Game players note!~ If you are going to talk to me, i have no probelm but if you are going to have your "man" friends write me and talk shit, I will back mine up!~ 

Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.

There are days that feel so dark, the days when we can see without knowing what we see. There are days that we hear and never know the words that are spoken. It is if everything is going on around us and we dont exist and cant make the sounds or gestures to feel as if we are a part of the world. I know those days, the days when it seems no one cares, no one will notice us. Those days are the most cruel days we see. I have been there, i have felt them, seen them and know them. I see your words and a cry, but there are no tears. 

First, you have to dig deep and know that there are people in your life right now that love and care for you. You have nurtured 3 kids that love you beyond this world. They are a reflection of your love, devotion, understanding, knowledge and faith. I often say to myself you are one of the "lucky ones" You have that base of caring, and the ability to open up, share and even sometimes hide behind those around you. When I am at my darkest is when there is no shelter, I am out in the open, no where to turn or hide, and it is not fun.

The one thing that feels so hard is the alone feeling, you are not alone, you have those that care about you and want your happiness and success. Life is  harsh, it can be overwhelming at times, but is is a fleeting moment. As the sands of a beach, each grain is nothing by itself, but when coined with all the others it makes for beauty and everlasting change. That is the moments we go through. Alone the moments are small, but the totality of it is life and the life we go through. You are a part of something huge and beautiful, just hard to look at the big picture right? I understand. 

Change is hard, We  start young living this life of who we want to be, we are wide eyed and have all the dreams and aspirations of what could be. This is a wonderful point in life because there are no limits. In our minds and action we can be anything we want to be. You sometimes go through these phases ( more now then before) and I have to say that your life is not all bad, you just have to understand why you feel the way you do. It begins at home!! You are not happy, frustration is huge, and the most important you dont deserve to go through what you do. You hate your job, why? Not the job, but everything, like said earlier the sands on the beach, it all adds up either good or bad. But I say that the overwhelming feelings you have stem and root from the home. That is where change can happen.

Later in life and one of the longest parts of the journey is the part of life where we live based on what other want us to be. This is the living for others stage. In this stage we abandon the dreams, ideas, and thoughts the previous were filled with. We accept in many ways the society boundaries, the expectations of family, friends, and the environment we have settled into. Thing can be comfortable, things can be peaceful in this stage but there is a piece that starts to brew each and every day. The thoughts, ideas, wants, needs, and desires that brew slowly begin the third stage of life. 

The next step takes time, patience, understanding and a great deal of growth. It is the who we are stage. This is the realization that through our life’s journey we have gained knowledge and through this knowledge we understand that there are things we can and can not be. We realize that there is a very deep part of us that makes who we are and we come to terms with it. Once these molds are realized life can and will become greater than ever imagined, the dreams we once had have manifested into natural wonders of reality and progression. I have heard hundreds of stories of this self realization and though they may vary in speed, time and roads of life, they all lead to greater strengths and natural abilities. In my honest opinion I do not think that there is anyone that does not go through this, again the time of life and the speed at which the stage progress in life vary  from one person to another but the results are the same. Some tend to fight the
feelings and over time become consumed in staying in one of the first two stages, if they only knew how wonderful the last stage is. The sooner this stage is reached the longer the life’s enjoyment can be.

Changing  is hard, fear holds us back and attachment to our thoughts is strong. Fear and attachment are powerful things…Attachment is not negative in a common person. It's part of our living. Negativity is addictive. The person knows it's hurting and wants to stop but the addiction pulls the mind back to hide. It takes much inner strength to change oneself. Yes, it's very, very, very difficult. And also very easy! When the mind understands itself truthfully, then it's easy. Think of any situation and find out your mind's desire involved in it. Do you know the ego feels its existence in negativity and in positivity the ego doesn't feel so strongly? The ego pulls the mind back to negativity to feel its existence. Go back to your past: how many bad events of life do you remember and how many good events? You will find 90% are bad and more clear. 10% are good but like in a fog. This is the great power of our ego. You will feel overwhelmed. You have already
conditioned your mind. You feel it because you have fear. Why are we afraid? If you are in the woods all alone and a person comes running towards you, your first thought will be “that is a bad person coming to hurt me.” The person comes and asks if that path goes to a lodge. Then you feel better and think the person is not bad. Do you see how fast the ego is ready to defend itself?

Once the passing and the fears and attachments are gone there is this amazing feeling and world to embrace forever!

We scare ourselves and make our own visions dark, it is natural to do and yet we know the other side is so bright.

Many on the outside cannot understand what transpires within One who is in this lifestyle. We are looked at as weird or perverts. This is far from the truth. The desire to control another is imbedded within Us. It is the same as the desire to serve within a sub. This is simply a way that W/we are programmed. For Me, the only way to satisfy that is to find one who will submit. Rough sex is an act that many from all walks of life engage in. There are many who will sexually dominate their partners during sex. “Dirty” talk is quite common. Words such as “slut”, “whore”, and “cunt” are used to enhance the experience. Also, there are many swingers who engage in the active sexual lifestyle. They choose a model that is different from the monogamous norm. Yet they return to their daily lives after the playing is done. Well, so do W/we in many regards.

The power to be in control is a phenominal sensation. However, it comes with responsibility. When one submits fully to you, she ceded all power over her life. It is now Yours. To derive the full benefit out of that power, One must use it wisely while respecting the responsibility that goes along with it. The payoff is grand.

We are equals in the sense that she and I are are well-matched in terms of personality, education, intelligence, sense of humor, interests, long-term goals, and what we're looking for out of a relationship. We are equals because I'm no better than her, and she is no better than me. I don't think I'd be attracted to a woman who I didn't consider my "equal" in the ways I listed above. We are equals because we are both worthy of giving and receiving love in the way that best suits us. To the best of my assessment,she is worthy of my dominance and I am worthy of her submission. We are not equals because I am dominant and she is submissive. I dominate. She submits. I have more control in the relationship than she does--more control over what we do, how we do it, and when we do it. My say overrides hers. Of course, the person with more control in a relationship is, by default, in a position over the one who isn't. We are not equal because my say overrides hers. You cannot put a value in equality, Equality isn't important to us because it doesn't facilitate us getting what we want out of the relationship. You are submissive, and I am dominant. In that regard, we're equal in that we're both getting what we want and what we need from the relationship. The way we both get what we want is through our acknowledgement of different individual needs and through our consent to an imbalance of control, perhaps not in theory, but most certainly in practice.

As a Dom I feel that I must provide the feeling of comfort, security and guidance that a real Dom provides, and sexual behavior is often separate from the relationship of every day power exchange that a Dom provides.When I have that one, I love the one with an undying passion. I always have my submissive best interest in mind, even when it conflicts with his personal desires. That doesn't mean that I give into her every whim. There can be a huge difference in her desires and her real needs. I must be able to make that sacrifice for her if needed. And yes, at times I do punish her. This usually hurts me just as much if not more than her, but I will always do what's best for her. I help her set and reach her goals in life, not just in the lifestyle. I will help her improve herself to be the best she can be, not for ME but for her ! I am not just looking to make her a better submissive, but a better person in general. I believe that there are two products of time and the mind. First if you capture the mind there is nothing in this world that can keep your body from following. If you take the time and truly learn about a person and not set limits then the body and physical activities follow. Everyone has different ways and ideas of this happening, however bottom line is the capturing of ones spirit and thoughts. See I am not about what you vocalize and what you feel today, I am all about what you have not yet thought or felt. It is bringing out that inside emotion, lets face you would not be here reading this if you had brought it out before. I am sure you can give your body to someone that brings out a certain something inside you, but have you ever even imagined how wonderful it would be if you never had to tell them about yourself, but they told, showed you who you were inside?

I want nothing more than to pull her close and protect her from the cruel world. But knowing all along that I can't ! SO... it is up to me to prepare her for whatever life may through her way and be there to comfort her when things go wrong... Knowing she will run to me when she becomes overwhelmed or frighten by the harshness of life. As a Dom I will listens to all her fears and concerns, knowing no matter how silly or childish they may sound to her, they are real and I will help her confront them. Above all else I will cherish my submissive, in the knowledge that the gift given me is the greatest of all. I will be demanding and take full advantage of the power given to me. But I also know how to share the pleasure that comes from this most precious gift. I will be in control of myself first and foremost, so that I may accept the control offered to me by my submissive. I am aware as a stern and demanding dominant, I can cause my sub to cry real tears. As a compassionate lover, I will kiss the tears away, without ever stepping out of character. In times of trouble, I will leave the roles behind, to be a supportive friend and partner, never forgetting that this is still a loving relationship between two caring individuals. I am quick to understand the differences between fantasy and reality.

The term "Use" a real sub is useful not usable! 

Note to all: This is not Jimmy Johns, no freaky fast deliveries! Savor it, learn it, enjoy it and wait for it

It all starts with communication...All SHIPS, sail on an ocean, this ocean is deep, vast, never ending and sometimes rough, sometime calm. However the ocean is always there to reply on to keep the ships afloat. The ocean is COMMUNICATION…and the SHIPS are…. relationSHIPS, partnerSHIPS, and friendships. THERE MUST BE AN OCEAN OF COMMUNICATION....

~ Dom 8.0

Do you know what laughter is? Then we can talk, really? SO serious? Sorta scary