|
|
|
|
| Sissy Amber wants to be owned again. He tried to leave the lifestyle and attempt conventional relationships. Here is what he wrote me after almost a year of trying:
"> I hope this letter finds you doing well and smiling . First
> and foremost thank you for the privelage alone of writing
> you, for which I do not take for granted. The purpose of my
> writing you to you today Mommy is to explore, exploit, expel
> and expand my words and thoughts unto paper which have taken
> me far to long to exhibit. It has been nearly one year since
> I have been owned by you. It is in this year that I have
> reached my lowest level of depsair, darkness and
> desperation. In the past year, I have been living a lie and
> lying to the world. The facade I awake to everyday is trying
> to fool myself and the world that I am an actual man. I
> harken back to a time, seemingly long ago where I had a
> place and where I had purpose. A place where I had
> direction, discipline and a sense of self. A place where I
> was free of the bonds of society which held me captive for
> so long. That place, now a distant memory deep in my heart
> was at your feet as your cherished sissy
> baby slave.
>
> I reap only the disfavor now of which I brought upon
> myself. The peril of trying to think for myself knowing full
> well I was enraptured in a lie and a fantasy which will
> forever be just a pipe dream. That disalusioned state lead
> me to believe I was a man, most damaging it lead me away
> from you and my true identity which you showed me was my
> soul. Now, in my darkest hour I come to you as the prodical
> son. Naked before you baring a soul with no purpose a soul
> that you have forever rightfully known. In your wisdom,
> guidance , foresight and love you let me leave. You let me
> leave knowing only what has taken me my darkest year of
> peril to realize, that I was born a sissy slave. That God so
> blessed that out of all humanity he gifted upon me the one
> person in this world that would love me unconditionally
> without judgement, love me without bias and accept me into a
> lifetime of ownership unto you which freed my soul to
> heights of glory and happiness.
>
> When in my simple mind and disillusioned heart my will was
> set, you let me leave without question. You let me leave
> knowing deep down that this world I was trying to fool would
> break me. I come to you today and admit full well it has.
> Never, in my life have I felt so unloved, unworthy,
> undisciplined, unhealthy and scared. In the deepest reaches
> of my heart now in nearly total darkness, I write to you
> today to create a bridge. A bridge that I may once again,
> proudly crawl across to your feet and beg of your glowing,
> glorious foregiveness. I am here in the hope that the torch
> you once carried as my owner has not yet gone out, in the
> hope that you may take that torch and alite my senses to the
> path of reality once again as your sissy slave.
>
> As a completely blank canvas I come to you with no
> misgiving or preconceptions. A canvas upon which for once
> and forever through you, with you and for you I can enable
> you to paint your masterpiece of the perfect sissy slave. I
> am wise to the fact only that this path I rightfully should
> never have swayed from will be filled with much anguish,
> pain, humiliation and degredation. I place in you my full
> faith, trust , mind, body and soul for you to control for
> all of time. This decision was not made hastefully but over
> a years worth of pain, shallowness and void. It is through
> this disgusting life that I have lived for the past year
> that only now I realize that I left the kingdom of happiness
> by leaving your feet.
>
> Mommy, it is with great regret and much sorry that only now
> have I come to my capacities. That I as a mere inferior
> male, marked and deemed upon this earth as a sissy come to
> find favor, hope and solace that only you can bless me with.
> If accepted, I know full well my rights, privellages, life
> and forever will be through you and you alone. You will have
> all the power, you will have all the control and you alone
> will shape and give me destiny without compromise. I
> readily admit I start from absolute zero and am far in any
> shape or way that of my former great slave identity you once
> gracefully bestowed me with. I enter into this communication
> with you in the hope I may have an opportunity to once
> agtain prove my worth and to once again garner a life of
> which only you can give.
>
> I am no longer going to fool the world that I am a man. I
> long for the day to delight and accept the fact through your
> discipline , training and know how that I am an absolute
> sissy diaper slave. To once again know that happiness that
> came with being pushed to my utter limits for the grandest
> prize of all...............your smile !
>
> Thank you Mommy for your consideration, time and thoughts.
> It is only through you and you alone can I once again have
> purpose, peace and happiness. You hold my world in your
> hands, I can only hope I have not strayed far enough away
> from the path to never again see your light which has always
> guided me through my darkest day.
>
> Gratefully appreciative,
>
> sissy amber"
I would like to discuss this issue with men and women with a similar experience.
|
|
|
|
