- The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Hetero Male Dominant, 45,  Topeka, Kansas
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Dargo - photo 1
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SweetOhioBBW MRRoy2 thekittycat

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Last Online:


 Dominant Male



 5' 4"

 200 lbs






Actively Seeking:

Submissive Female

 Lives For:

 Renaissance Faires

 Science Fiction


 Fine Dining

 Movies (Expert)

 Travel (Beginner)

 Massage (Getting)

 Board Games


 Horror Movies

 TV Sports


 Eighties Music

 Seventies Music




 Amusement Parks

 Art Galleries

 Bar Hopping (Beginner)



 Coffee Shops  (Beginner)

 Flea Markets (Beginner)

 Gambling (Beginner)


 Musical Theater

 Opera (Beginner)


 Volunteerism (Beginner)

 Camping (Beginner)


 Anal Play

 Bondage (Beginner)

 Breast Binding/Play


 Hair Pulling

 Massage (Giving)

 Arcade Games

 Card Games


 Comedy Shows

 Online RPGs

 Puzzle Games

 Role Playing Games

 Simulation Games


 True Crime

 TV News






 Classical Music

 Electronica / EDM

 Heavy Metal Music

 Hip Hop Music


 New Wave

 Nineties Music



 Pop Music




 Rock Music






 Garage Sales


 Country Music

 Auto Racing

 Curious About:

 Antique Shows

 Fishing (Beginner)




I don't play games or will deceive you. Just need to take time get to know each other.

I am a long-term kind of a relationship person; I will of course treat my sub/slave with respect and be happy that she is mine. I have to stress that this search is very real to me, if you are looking for a buddy then that's ok as well.

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Journal Entries:
4/27/2012 10:51:27 AM
Thank you so much for making my birthday even more special with all your wonderful wishes! Trust me, it definitely means a lot!

4/7/2012 4:36:43 PM

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE, enjoy the time with your family and everyone around you

2/21/2012 5:45:09 AM
I went to a new Chinese restaurant with a buffet. I tried frog legs. yes frog legs. now its texture is like chicken but in no way it tasted like chicken. So that was fun and interesting and I will never have frog legs again.

2/14/2012 4:15:37 AM

I haven't been around for some time, I been sick and fighting a cold for a few days and just feeling better finally. So it has been a lot of resting for me and of course not much online.


So happy valentine's day to everyone.

1/31/2012 4:59:14 AM

Silence is golden .. but duct-tape comes in a variety of colors and patterns, and its much more effective.

12/30/2011 3:15:25 PM

Here is wishing everyone one a very Happy Christmas and a very joyous New Year! Hope the New Year brings happiness to all.

11/12/2011 2:36:43 PM
I say what I mean, and I mean what I say!!!!!!!

10/31/2011 4:57:10 AM

happy halloween to all my friends, I hope you have a spooky and fun time

9/2/2011 5:37:15 AM

Wishing you a happy and safe labor day weekend

7/2/2011 8:38:56 AM

wishing you and your family a good weekend and a happy 4th of July

5/7/2011 9:06:46 PM

To all the wonderful moms, mom-in-laws, step-moms, second-moms & dads-who-are-moms-too. Wishing you all a very Happy Mother's Day.

4/4/2011 8:44:41 AM

WOW 8 years. 8 years since my sister passed away.


So much has happen in 8 years.  So much she has missed, how she would have enjoyed, and a lot she wouldn’t have. I miss her, think of often conversations we would have had over the past year. The things she would have loved hearing about.


A lot of the pain is gone after all these years but the sorrow is there, the sorrow is deep.


As always and forever will be, I love you sis, miss you very much. 

3/16/2011 12:56:50 AM

I had surgery on my right eye on Tuesday. Three weeks after having surgery done to fix a complicating caused by my diabetes (which is healing nicely, but still healing from) and two week from having surgery on my left eye.


I am doing well at the moment. Was a long tuesday morning but once we got into surgery the day went fast, By the time the day was done, majority of it was a blur, but I was home and safe, resting and done.


I will know more on Wednesday how it all went so will be starting to recover from that and start getting ready for the next one.


I like to thank all that have giving me support by messages, calling me (especially on the day of surgery), and those driving me back and forth to/from all the surgeries.


Since I had this one done, I do know what it will be like in two weeks and will be more prepare for the surgery on March 29.

2/27/2011 12:14:35 AM

I had surgery on Friday to fix a complication caused by my diabetes and I have to say I not feeling as bad as I thought I would be at this pint. I’m healing nicely and been getting good rest.  Walking slowly but able to stand for a while and sit for a bit as well. Making sure that I try to do anything to tear up my stitches.


So now that this is done and out of the way now all I have to do is heal and get ready for my next surgery, which will be on March 15 for my right eye (I have cataracts) and soon after that would be my left eye.

2/24/2011 6:34:15 PM

Won’t be around after 2.25, will be recovering from surgery, talk soon.

1/19/2011 5:22:40 PM

Well I just finished getting over a cold, so much fun,. Best way for me to deal with it is to shut down.  I know sounds very antisocial anti productive whatever, but living alone its the best way to just cope, easier to just not try to deal with the coughing and sneezing and hours of just not feeling great. Easier to just take a lot of cold meds, sleep sleep sleep and just let it run its course.


So far talked to the VA (yes I go to the VA since I'm a veteran) and they talking about a year on the waiting list. I'm like you got to be kidding, so I'm going to local hospital and/or clinic to see they can do it sooner. No way am I going to wait around half blind for a year.


Life ... how crazy it is so far this 2011.

1/12/2011 8:22:58 AM

Long few days of thinking.


Monday I was told that I have developed cataracts. Now I’m a bit happy that its something that can be corrected, for a while there I was thinking I was loosing my vision.


As it slowly sank in, on Tuesday I did more research abut cataracts and what the surgery intel. Now that was a big mistake. Saw a video on the whole procedure and wow that really freaked me out. It took me a day to take that in and just think that positive of it all. I will see better.


Only down part of the whole thing is I’m going t be dealing with all this alone, would be nice to have someone during the recovery period.

1/7/2011 12:23:04 AM

Well the venting help the last time, felt way better as I let things out.


Kinda cheered up by a friend, who has an online radio show. My friend is interested in doing a  show on BDSM and having me come on and talk on the subject. I'm not saying I'm an expert but can help enlighten some people about the lifestyle and take on questions to help them understand it a bit better.. Looking forward to it.

1/4/2011 7:50:27 AM

I am tired, I am pissed, I am frustrated, I am angry.


Coming close to having a relationship comes down to two things for me.
 I am either "not enough", "too good for someone like me" (meaning that person), "not bad boy enough", "not dangerous enough", "too good to be true" or I end up being a choice (me and some other person) and I never get chosen. 


I don't understand anymore, in all my courtship and wooing I have treated the person in both world (vanilla and D/s) with respect and without fail no one is interested.


Even here I have read many profiles that says "don't call me names", "treat with respect", "no one liner", and I don't do that, I take the time to read profile, try to write long messages and 99 percent of the time no response or my message gets deleted unread.


I can imagine if anyone read this that they will go "look at he poor Dom acting like a baby" or something. I just basically tired, angry and frustrated ... that I put my best effort out there and I get not much n return, not even a chance.



1/2/2011 12:14:25 PM

Great! Now the voices in my head have started saying "Press 1 if you want to hear this message in English!"

12/29/2010 10:19:32 PM

Happy New Year everyone, May the year bring you lots of love, prosperity, happiness, a whole lot of fun and good memories along the way!

12/25/2010 3:49:14 PM

Christmas is a happy time, a time for family. In my family it’s a mix feeling time of year. I try not to think of it much because it’s a downer for sure.


Christmas eve was the ninth anniversary of my father passing. Wow almost ten years ago a whole decade.


Even tho it’s been that long, I still remember that Christmas eve. Living here in Kansas, I was calling NYC and wishing my family a merry Christmas. Dad been battling throat cancer. And was doing well. I called and I first talked with my mom, she told me how festive everyone was and that she had a good talk with my dad. Talked about the good and the bad about their relationship. Cleared a lot of air. Before having dinner that night he took a nap. So there I was talking to her as she tells me this and I got to talk with the rest of the family. I had a good conversation with my sister and my grandmother, and once again with my mom. Then she asked if I wanted to talk to him, I said sure and she tried to wake him form his nap. No reaction, She told me that she needed to hang up and call 911.


The next day (Christmas day) I got a called that he passed away. So I just packed a few things and drove to NYC for a funeral.


Ever since then Christmas hasn’t been that happy of an event for my family even tho I try real hard to be cheerful with my family but he loom largely over my family (mostly my mom for good reason). .


Well I got that off my chest, feel better to letting that out a bit. I just know that it’s going to be hard from my mom next year.

12/24/2010 2:15:53 AM
To all of my friends I have made, Those who left for awhile and those who have stayed, Merry Christmas!

12/20/2010 10:57:43 AM

12/18/2010 4:29:39 AM
364 days of being Naughty vs. ONE lump of COAL??? I'll take my CHANCES !!!

12/9/2010 9:57:12 PM
Dear Santa, can you please email me a copy of your naughty list please? I wanna know where all the 'naughty girls' live. Thanks.

12/6/2010 2:35:26 AM
Dear Santa - I have very valuable information. Names, places,.. I'm willing to cut a deal.

11/23/2010 10:29:33 AM

To all my friends and those that take time to read this, I’m wishing you a very hearty and fun Thanksgiving.

11/20/2010 7:28:15 AM

Just a few days before Thanksgiving, so have a great one and enjoy and remember ... What happens under the mistletoe stays under the mistletoe!

10/29/2010 4:57:24 PM

Happy Halloween, I hope you have a great weekend and a lot of fun!

10/19/2010 8:20:18 PM

The last seven weekends has been a great time for me, seven weekend of attending the KC Renaissance Fair. I had a great time, I got to make new friends, see old friends, and have a lot of great time and made a lot of fun memories. At times almost got to meet new friends. Looking forward to doing it all over again next year.

8/26/2010 12:42:42 PM
If anything this is the one thing I post mostly about it, I think its because I'm a private person and out of all things I do discuss a lot about this cause it is important to me. Another years and another birthday of my sister is here and going soon, never to see a year older, to be forever 33.

I miss my sister, lover her dearly every day, I smile with the thought of her enjoying being 41 this year.I think she would have had a lot of fun, she would have enjoyed turning 41 and just being in her 40s.

Sad day for me, but I will get around it. Just a sad day.  

8/19/2010 4:58:13 PM
her submission
In the wake of her submission
On passions wings she flies to Him
she kneels before feet
No words are needed
As she offers all herself to Him
Silently His actions speak
He reaches down to touch her skin
she cries at His first touch
He lifts up into His arms
And carries her into His lair
He lays her down
His eyes commanding hers
In the call of her submission
her body spreads and opens
she beckons Him to explore
her scent to Him is an addiction
He needs her to quench His thirst
To feed His insatiable appetite
her moans and whimpers
Are lustful music to His ears
He roams freely over what is to be His
Committing her into His memory
He knows each line, each sultry curve
The texture of her skin
The weight of each breast
The warmth of her passions lotion
He will take her for His own
He knows she is now ready
His body blankets hers
He drives deep into His home
With each thrust He ventures closer
To claiming her body, mind and soul
He sees the tears glazed in her eyes
As He brings her passions sweetest gift
He now flows within her veins
He watches as her body bucks
Shared sweat drips between T/them
The reward of ecstasy well deserved
Damp tendrils of golden locks clinging
His fingers push them away from her face
A knowing smile between T/them
His first word to her…."Mine"
She breaths out…."Master"……

4/4/2010 6:39:56 AM
RIP Sis, 7 years and still miss you very much. 

3/27/2010 11:30:46 PM
I had a great evening. Tonight, my friends and  I went to Kansas City to see Kevin Smith in person, as he did his 'A night with Kevin Smith' live.

It was an entertaining and fun evening, it lived up to my expectations and I laughed all night long.

For those who don't know, Kevin Smith is a screenwriter, film producer, and director, as well as a comic book writer, author, comedian, and actor. He is also the co-founder, with Scott Mosier, of View Askew Productions and owner of Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash comic and novelty store in Red Bank, New Jersey. He also hosts a weekly podcast with Scott Mosier known as SModcast. Smith is known for participating in long, humorous Q&A sessions that are often filmed for DVD release, beginning with An Evening with Kevin Smith.

His films are often set in his home state of New Jersey, and while not strictly sequential, they do frequently feature crossover plot elements, character references, and a shared canon in what is known by fans as the "View Askewniverse", named after his production company View Askew Productions. He has produced numerous films and television projects, including Clerks, Dogma, and Zack and Miri Make a Porno.

His Q&A sessions are humorous and about his career as a screenwriter, film producer, director, comic book, author, and actor as well as some of his personal life.

2/28/2010 8:20:12 PM
Here a thought I found and liked;

'If you continue to do what you have always done, you'll continue to get what you have always got.'

2/25/2010 6:20:51 PM
I have to say that I got an interesting email it just said:


Did it ever occur to you that the reason you have not found your sub is because you are just too damn, dog ass ugly? Don't blame yourself, blame your parents.


Personally I had to laugh at this so I wrote back with just this.

"ok thank you for that insight"

That should have him wondering what the hell.  Really folk is this what a lot of the people reduce to on the site? An adult site with not a lot of people acting as an "adults"

2/4/2010 11:44:17 PM
Feb. 4

Yesterday was a hard day for me, my grandmother passed away on this date on 2007, and it was hard to loose someone I have known for all my life and another person in the family in the short period.

When she passed away she was short of her 99th birthday, she would have been 101 today.

She was a good woman, worked hard, and raised her 12 kids, with my mother being one of them. She took care of me, she loved me, she showed me how to cook. She help me become a better person.

I miss her.

1/24/2010 11:06:57 PM
You know what is frustrating.  That knowing I am a good Dom, yet having trouble finding a good sub wiling to at least talk to since they been bombarded with all the wrong kind of Doms on this site, that I have given me no chance at all.

And all the messages I get are mostly from pron sites and the fabulous women from Ghana, which as you know are a bunch of scam and porn as well.

I have talked to many and made few friends, at least I am happy that I have gotten to meet them here.

1/19/2010 5:14:41 AM

Safety When Meeting For The First Time


There is a tiny but very dangerous percentage of people out there which in all probability you will never meet. But you would be wise, in any event, to take measures to protect yourself from them.




Can this person give you any kind of reference, or what munches and clubs are they known at? Have any of your friends or fellow pervs, at munches, clubs or in channel heard of them? Are they known by people at the places they say they are known at?


Don't be shy! Ask around. People will understand and gladly help you. In fact they will probably tell you off if you take a risk and don't!


Get their home phone number and address, real name, email, and car registration. If they won't even give you their phone number, SERIOUSLY DON'T MEET THEM!





Meet in a public place, like a munch, a cafe, or restaurant and try to steer away from pubs and alcohol; getting tipsy will cloud your judgment.


Take care of what you drink! If you have read the paper or seen the news you will know about drinks being spiked!


Try to have one meeting at a munch, where you can introduce them to others with more experience or for an unbiased opinion. If they object, reassure them that munches are where people who are into BDSM meet in a friendly, social way; where they can learn, pass on information and get to know each other. If they still object, then SERIOUSLY DON'T MEET THEM! Listen to what they say. One crazed individual would tell his victims exactly what he was going to do to them, yet they still met him. When he got them alone he did just what he said he would! I wont go into details here, but they eventually caught him and put him away forever.


Listen to your instincts, don't get carried away. Yes you're excited, you have waited a long time and this could be the one. Take your time, listen to them, ask questions about their experience, and listen for (and do hear) those warning bells. Watch out for signs such as "I don't believe in safe words", "a true sub doesn't have limits" or "leave that to the experienced Dom/me".


OK this bit is basically common sense, the same as in the vanilla world when meeting someone. But in BDSM you can find yourself naked, bound and helpless. Think! Would you feel safe with them?


  • Do keep to a timetable, let friends know where and what time you are meeting and when you are leaving.
  • Don't change the meeting place at the last minute or leave it for another.
  • Do leave the meeting alone and on time.
  • Do check timetables for trains or buses home, you don't want to be stranded and in need of a lift!


Do arrange to call a friend, at a certain times during the meeting and again when it ends and of course when you get home, along the lines of a silent alarm, more of which later. OK so you have met several times, hopefully a munch was on during this time or your friends were passing at one meeting and met and liked them too. So now you have arranged your first private meeting where you can play.





Most people you meet will be genuine but there is always that tiny percentage who are not, so protect against them and do use a silent alarm (sometimes called a Safe Call). Tell the person you are meeting that you always arrange one, during first, second and third meetings. If they object for any reason, DON'T MEET THEM!





What is a silent alarm? Where you ring a trusted person at a pre-arranged time to confirm you are all right.


It's a good idea to ring them when you arrive at the address to confirm it. Then get them to ring you back straight away to check you have been given the right phone number and to let the person you are with know that someone knows where you are.


If your meeting will be in a car, again phone your friend to confirm the registration number. If you go to a hotel, again call and let them know the hotel address and room number. If you are meeting at your home call your friend and let them know your visitor has arrived. I am sure you get the idea.


Your silent alarm will expect you to call at a pre-arranged time, give or take 15 minutes. Do remember, you have a responsibility to call them. If you fail they will be contacting the police! So use the alarm in your cell phone or wristwatch, to remind you. If you don't they must first try to contact you at the number given, your cell phone or bleeper.


You will need an "everything's all right" word and a "things are going wrong" word. This should be something you would use in normal conversation. For instance, you tell them "Hi yes (your nick name) is all right" meaning everything IS all right or "hi yes (your Christian name) is all right" meaning something is WRONG.


This they can re-check with something like "I am sending (name of friend) a birthday card, want me to put your name to it?", you say "put (your Christian name) with love and kisses on it", confirming something IS wrong. Okay, this may sound a bit cloak and dagger, but if it's gone wrong then your conversation might be monitored so keep it chatty and normal.


At this point your silent alarm calls the police and tells them your name and the person's name and address, car registration and any other facts they have been given by you (so make sure you get them!). They tell them you're being held against your will and may even be hidden somewhere in the house.




Leave it to the police, they are the experts and know how to deal with this situation. Silent alarms are not new and the police are aware of them. Your silent alarm should offer to go there, but only with the police.





DON'T forget to cancel the silent alarm when you have left or have got home. You don't want the police arresting your long-waited-for newfound partner because you forgot!


DO REMEMBER you're not the first person to use a silent alarm. Experienced as well as new people use them, at first, second and third meetings. They may be a nuisance and take up time, but you are eliminating the dangers so you can relax and enjoy yourself which makes them more than worthwhile!




For further information read "SM101" by Jay Wiseman or "Screw the roses send me the thorns" by Philip Miller and Molly Devon. Both can be purchased from Amazon through there Books section.

1/14/2010 4:54:49 PM
The search is the hardest part of it all, now matter if you are a Dom or a sub, the search is the hardest part.

One come across the so called Doms/subs, the wannabes, and those who thinks they are ones but just like playing the roles.

And what does means to the ones that are truly a Dom truly a sub, most built a wall to a point the don't see the real ones from the fakes. Outside of Munches, gatherings, which would be an obstacle in itself. Trying to find one online is harder. I have come across what I think are great subs, but some reason or another they not seeing or even try to see what is in front to them.

At time it gets tiring to search and search and just come up short but I keep the faith.

1/13/2010 9:32:55 AM

Okay, okay, so, what do you actually DO, anyway?

Ah, now that's the fun part!

There are as many ways to "do" BDSM stuff as there are really, what you can do is almost limitless. These are just a few ideas to bring into your sex life.

Surprise Beginnings

This is a good way to start a scenario or an evening's activities. When the submissive is away, perhaps at work or at the store, take a brown paper bag and place a set of restraints (ankle cuffs, wrist cuffs, or the like), or a blindfold, or both, in it. Set the paper bag near the bedroom door (or, if you have enough privacy, near the door to the house!), and tape a sheet of paper with instructions on it on the door. The sheet should instruct the submissive to strip completely, open the bag, and put on the restraints/cuffs/blindfold before opening the door. The submissive is not allowed through the door until he or she is properly prepared.

Naughty boarding school student
(This is for male submissives)

A variant on the classic "naughty Catholic schoolgirl," this fantasy scenario features a male boarding school student who is caught by the headmistress doing something bad--masturbating, reading a dirty magazine, or that sort of thing. The stern headmistress (or headmaster) must then discipline the schoolboy. Spankings and other corporeal punishment is a good place to start; or perhaps he will be stripped and made to stand in the corner, or be stripped and have his genitals bound, or be forced to beg the headmistress or headmaster for permission. In any event, if he becomes aroused during the punishment, then he will be in much more serious trouble...which may include more punishment directly to the submissive's genitals.

Variations on this scenario include the submissive being "caught" by the babysitter or other caretaker.

to Pony play

Pony play is traditionally done with female submissives but works just as well for male submissives. The submissive is treated as a "pony," and fairly elaborate scenario can be constructed around the buying of a new pony, the humiliating rituals of checking teeth and genitals for health problems, and the teaching and learning of new gaits and tricks. For example, the dominant can stand still with a crop, with the submissive on a tether (attached to a bit or even to nipple piercings), and have the submissive run in circles around the dominant until he or she reaches a constant speed for 'walk', for 'canter', for 'gallop', and so on. The crop can be used for 'motivation', "Get those knees up!" for example. For this type of pony play is that all you really need are a bit gag, some rope for reins, a 'hitching post', and space.

A variant on this is adding a 'pony tail' (a fall of hair attached to a butt plug) which can be fun to comb, to braid, and even to tie bows in.


This is a role-playing scenario for three people, all of whom are lovers. One of the three players is a "ghost," invisible and inaudible to the other people. The two people who are not ghosts have a hot-n-heavy make-out session on the couch, while the ghost does whatever he or she likes to the other two people. The two people can not see or hear the ghost, but they can feel what the ghost does--so they blame the things on each other (for example, if the ghost gropes someone, that person will believe the other person did it). The ghost is free to do whatever he or she likes and touch or tease the others however he or she wants--completely blameless.

to Interrogation

An interrogation scene is a role-playing scenario where one person knows some information that the other person is trying to find out. The trick to an interrogation scene is to have some specific piece of information, which the submissive partner knows but the dominant partner doesn't. A good way to do this is to shuffle a deck of cards and have the submissive secretly look at the top card in the deck; the dominant's job then becomes to get the submissive to say what card it is.

A basic interrogation scene might start out with the dominant "capturing" and forcibly restraining the submissive, perhaps by stripping the submissive and tying the submissive to a chair or to the bed. The dominant then begins "torturing" the submissive to get the information. This "torture" can combine many of the ideas described here--clothespins, spanking, paddling, mock-"rape," and so on. If the submissive doesn't turn over the information, the dominant can keep escalating the interrogation, gradually moving to more and more intense activity, until the submissive cracks and tells the dominant the information. If you're interested, you can find out more about doing this kind of thing here.

Night Security

The setting here is straightforward: the dominant is a security guard, and the submissive has committed some infraction--perhaps trespassing on secure property while walking home late one night.

The security guard confronts the offender, and takes the offender back into the security room, where the offender is subject to a humiliating strip search. The security guard explains that standard policy is for the police to be notified and the offender is to be booked for criminal trespass, but that other arrangements can be made; at this point, wishing to avoid a night in jail, the offender does whatever the security guard instructs.

As a variation, the security guard is required by company policy to videotape the search, to prevent liability problems; after the guard and the trespasser reach their agreement, the guard continues to videotape the trespasser while the guard molests him or her, just to add to the humiliation...

The Prize

In this scenario, the submissive is a dancer at an "anything goes" nightclub. As a special promotion, the club has sponsored a drawing; the winner of the drawing gets full and complete use of the stripper for an evening, and the stripper must allow the winner to do whatever he or she wants. The winner takes full advantage of the prize, using the stripper as a sex toy; the stripper must be completely obedient and allow the winner to do whatever the winner wishes, regardless of how the stripper feels about it.

to Secret past

The submissive in this scenario has a secret past--some dark, shameful thing he or she has done, which his or her spouse absolutely, positively must never learn about. One day, a person out of this dark past shows up on the submissive's doorstep, with photographs and videotape in hand, threatening to expose the submissive's secret to his or her spouse.

Desperate, the submissive bribes the blackmailer with sexual favors, trading sex for the secrecy. The blackmailer may make any demands on the submissive's body; the submissive is forced to comply, or be exposed.

to The Hostage

This scenario is best with some prior planning; arrange a night in a seedy motel at the edge of town.

In this scenario, the submissive is an innocent victim, and the dominant is a desperate criminal. The dominant carjacks the victim's car to escape police, not allowing the victim time to escape and driving too fast for the victim to jump out of the car. The carjacker drives to a seedy motel on the edge of town, where he or she decides to take advantage of the turn of events by raping the victim in the run-down motel room.

The Photo Shoot

This is a fun scenario with a bonus: a little something after it's done as a keepsake.

One person is a professional photographer, specializing in erotic and sensual photography. The other is the client, who wants a special set of photographs. The client commissions the photographer to do a sexy series of photos, in whatever pose the photographer wants.

After the shoot is over, the photographer reveals a catch: the photographer wants payment for the shoot in a...special form. Rather than paying the normal fee, the client will pay the photographer in sexual favors. The client renders payment by becoming the photographer's plaything, agreeing to do whatever the photographer says. The photographer may even do a second shoot to record the events...

This can be a fun prelude to the "Secret Past" scenario described above, where later the photographs are used to blackmail the submissive into giving sexual favors.

The Pirate

This is a basic role-playing scenario. You're the rapacious pirate plundering the village; she's the innocent maiden in the local town. (It works particularly well if you have an eye patch and a bandana.) She's at home alone, minding her own business, when you come crashing through the door. She struggles, of course, but she's helpless to resist you. Swooping down on her, you bodily rip her clothing from her and pin her against the wall. You hold her there by the wrists while you explain what you're going to do to her. Then, finally, you ravish her until you're thoroughly satisfied.

Dinner and a Movie

This one explores the psychology of power exchange. One of you agrees to be the submissive for the evening; the other is the dominant, the maestro, the one whose word is law. You go out for an evening on the town--a formal dinner, perhaps, and maybe a movie afterward. The dominant should establish a few rules beforehand; for example, the submissive is not allowed to speak to or have any contact with anyone except the dominant. So, for example, when you're ordering your meals in the restaurant, the submissive cannot tell the waiter what to bring; he or she must tell the dominant, who will then tell the waiter. (Or, you can turn this around; the dominant speaks to nobody except through the submissive.) Rules like this are fun to play with, because while the people around you may notice something is going on, they won't know exactly what. As the evening progresses, the dominant can find all kinds of delightfully subtle ways to tease the submissive.

Perhaps the dominant will tell the submissive to go to the restroom and remove his or her underwear, the better to tease him or her in a darkened theater. The dominant can order the submissive not to come back out of the restroom until he or she has masturbated to high arousal.

Or perhaps the submissive will have to wear a sex toy or anal plug of some sort under his or her clothes. Maybe during dinner the dominant can whisper to the submissive what will happen when they get back home.

The key to enjoying this kind of scenario is to keep it quiet; it's great fun if nobody else has the slightest idea what's going on. (To an aroused submissive, it will seem like it's obvious and that everybody knows what's happening--and that's part of the fun!)

Mad Scientist

In this game, the dominant is the evil mad scientist, and the submissive is his helpless experimental victim. The mad scientist (who for effect can be wearing rubber gloves and a disposable laboratory gown) has the subject tied to his examining table deep in the heart of his laboratory, and can perform all manner of experiments on her. He might, for example, probe her in various places using any one of a number of suitable laboratory instruments (vibrators are good for this). Perhaps while he's doing that, he might put clothespins on her nipples, to see how they respond to compression. Maybe he'll want to experiment to see how long she can be stimulated without being allowed to climax. He could keep her there through the long hours of the night, conducting endless experiments to find out how many times she can climax, or how large a probe she can accept, or how deeply she can be get the idea.

If you happen to be polyamorous, an interesting variant on this game is "Mad Scientist, Submissive Lab Assistant, and Innocent Victim."

(good for female submissives)

This starts as a romantic evening at home. It can be dinner for two, or cocktails, or simply wine in front of the fireplace. In any event, after kissing, cuddling and necking for a while, she refuses to go farther. Slapping him, or pinching him in the middle of a clinch, should be last-ditch actions.

Finally he reaches his limit. When she rejects his demand that she "put out", he ties her up, then has his way with her until she begs him for release.

Crime and Punishment

Make up some silly rules, the violation of which is grounds for arrest. One such "rule" might be Attempted Seduction; another could be Aggregated Sexiness, or Possession of a Dangerous Body. Or she can to wear hooker clothes, and stand on the corner of Driveway and Garage Door when he drives home. She makes him an offer, only to learn that he's a vice cop.

In any case, she's placed under arrest. He makes her "spread 'em", frisks her, and ties her hands -- it's been a busy night, they're out of handcuffs. This can also explain why she's tied to a chair in the squad (bed) room instead of going to lockup. If she smarts off to the arresting officer, he might even gag her.

Depending on your own particular tastes, she could get a bench trial and be sentenced to a spanking. Or she could bribe the officer with her body...

Switch Tease

Before anything gets underway, she ties his hands and blindfolds him. Then she puts on a sexy outfit that he likes her to wear. (Have you ever had to sit and listen to a woman change clothes?) When she's ready, she removes the blindfold, and proceeds to tease her prisoner unmercifully with her body. At some point, of course, she makes a mistake. Perhaps his pleas to be allowed to touch her make her careless. In any event, he gets loose, seizes her in his strong, masculine arms, and proceeds to tie her up. He then drives her wild with desire, until, standing over his captive, he slowly strips . . . Okay, you get the idea.

These kinds of things all qualify as "doing" BDSM; there are endless variants on these ideas, and a whole rich territory outside these particular scenarios to explore. Some people might be interested in doing this sort of thing only occasionally, and alternate between who's the dominant and who's the submissive; other people like to make dominance and submission a full-time part of their lives. The point is to have fun with it; discover what arouses you and do it!

Exchange of Power
(Good for bondage fans, rather than D/s fans)

She dresses in full Domme gear -- black lace bustier, long gloves, stockings and high heeled boots -- or a reasonable and affordable facsimile. She also needs a weapon -- a whip is of course traditional, but a toy pistol could also be used. She struts out and confronts him, orders him about like a mere slave. Perhaps he goes along for a bit, lulling her into false security. Then he swings into action, knocking her talisman of power from her hand. Perhaps he gives her "The Kiss of the Petite Mort"--a kiss so romantically powerful that her will is completely sapped. Or if they want to play a little rougher, he simply clips her (lightly!) on the jaw, knocking her out. Then he ties her up. She struggles fetchingly in her unyielding bonds, demanding release until her gags her. Then, slowly, he has his way with her helpless body . .

Playing Army

This one can be played either of two ways: Either the resistance fighter has been captured by the local garrison -- tied to a chair and interrogated as to the location of the secret base -- or the soldier has been caught by the local guerrillas, who are known for their ruthless treatment of the Occupation forces.

There are two costume choices. Either he puts on a "uniform" of dark green work pants, T-shirt and combat boots while she wears a partisenne costume of satin skirt, striped T-shirt, beret, and heels. Or he wears the beret and stripes as the Partisan while she wears a military-looking skirted suit with brass decorations and boots.

Pick a war, pick a side, have fun with it. In any case, the captive should manage to seduce the guard and escape.

(This is for guys to spring on girls)

Call your lady friend. Tell her you've heard that there are Burglars in her neighborhood, who prey on the type of young, beautiful, single woman who traipses around her apartment at 8:00 in the evening wearing sexy lingerie. They tie these women up, ransack their bedrooms, then Have Their Way with their helpless victims. They seldom even have to break in, because these women are the scatterbrained type who leave their front doors unlocked.

I mean: Lay it on with a trowel. Make it abundantly clear to your friend that she should be lounging around her place in lingerie with the front door unlocked at 8 o'clock tonight.

Obviously, you go over to her place at 8, wearing a burglar costume: Black shirt, black slacks, leather gloves, a swag bag, and a mask of some kind. When you buzz, announce "Burglars!" in a friendly voice (assuming there's nobody else in the lobby) Go up to her place. Open the door. Tiptoe around until you find your lady, hopefully dressed to please you. You could "chloroform" her by holding a handkerchief soaked in cheap cologne lightly over her nose and mouth for a few seconds; or she could obligingly faint at the very sight of you. Or you can simply seize her in your strong, manly arms. The result is the same: She gets bound and gagged in her bedroom, where she must sit / lie helplessly while you go through her dresser drawers, take her costume jewelry, rummage in her purse, and generally violate her space. Then you can violate her. After you've taken everything of value, you leave her tied up and go. (NOTE DANGER WARNING ALERT PAY ATTENTION! Do NOT go out any doors that lock, period!) Just go a short distance away. Wait a few minutes. Put on a different shirt, and take off the mask. Then go back into the bedroom with a cheerful, "Here I am to protect you from the burglars -- Heavens! What happened!!" Untie her, take her in your arms, comfort her in any way she may desire. See how many ways she can show her gratitude for being rescued.

For people whose tastes are a bit spicier, you can do the same sort of scenario with less warning. Call your partner and tell her you've just seen a news report that says there's a burglar in the area. Then, dress as a burglar, and creep into your house. Catch your partner by surprise, physically overpower him or her, and have your way with him or her.

Burglar II
(Good for submissive females)

In this version, she's the burglar -- black leotard, black tights, high-heeled boots and mask. She sneaks into his apartment, and begins rummaging through his things. Suddenly the lights go on -- she's caught! He ties her up to hold her for the cops. She pleads with him, and offers *anything* if he will let her go. . . .


This is a complex role-playing scenario good for psychological interplay. In this scenario, one partner is possessed by a demon; the other partner is a member of the clergy called in to cast out the evil spirit.

The demon does not want to go, of course, and will do anything, up to and including trying to seduce the clergyman, to escape. Complicating the scenario is the fact that the person possessed by the demon is sexually chaste and naive, and is quite shocked by the things the demon is making him or her do; complicating it still further is the fact that the clergyman is also sexually naive and inexperienced. So the evil demon forces a sexually timid person to seduce the inexperienced priest in some extremely vulgar and profane ways, much to the chagrin of the person whose body the demon has inhabited, and is using...

This scenario can allow you to really play up the virgin/whore dichotomy. It also allows for a great deal of very kinky humiliation play, where the person possessed by the demon will describe himself or herself in graphic and vulgar terms, and perform very kinky actions, while still trying to "resist" doing these things. Will the priest be able to cast out the demon before both people lose their purity? Probably not...

The Deprogramming

This is a scenario that's similar in some ways. It's also psychologically complex. One person is a brainwashed cult victim recently rescued from the clutches of a cult; the other is an unethical deprogrammer.

The deprogrammer is trying to undo the effects of the cult brainwashing. During this process, the cult victim becomes confused, and loses all perspective on the difference between right and wrong. The unethical deprogrammer takes advantage of the vulnerable cult victim by making the victim do things for the deprogrammer's own twisted sexual gratification.


12/31/2009 11:50:38 AM
We are closing out this decade with one important & unanswered question: Who let the dogs out?

9/24/2009 11:55:56 PM

Right now I’m trying to be a bit coherent (no I was drinking anything) as I just arriving from a Motorhead concert. I had a good time, the music LOUD and hard, took like an hour to get my hearing back. LOL. The opening act (Reverend Horton Heat and Nashville Pussy) was 50/50 good bad. Some of their music was not bad and some of their music wasn’t that good. I will have to see if I can find some of their music that I really enjoy, so far I know that anything from their current album will not make it on my playlist. As for Motorhead they rocked LOUDLY. Can’t say anything bad about because it rocked, ok just one thing, it was bloody loud, half way threw the show I just couldn’t hear anymore, took me a while to figure out they was sing “Overkill” cause it was all so loud. And of course there was the usual funny cigarettes being smoked all over the place (again I didn’t partake in that)!

Was interesting cause I got to see something I always wonder, what would happen if I went to a concert that I will enjoy … what would be the demographic of it all. Tonight was a good example of what I thought I expect to see, people my age and older (some that has to let the rocker look go), a few soccer moms and dads, and of course people in their 20s thinking they have the corner of metal all to themselves. It was interesting to see, and take part in it all. But I have to say I had a great time (except for 20 minutes)

9/8/2009 11:16:09 AM
I had a good weekend, spent it at the renaissance faire. Nice to see all the ladies in their corsets and bodices in public, with all that “Sir” thrown around was a visual and audio tease for the whole weekend. I’m looking forward to the next few weekends.

8/31/2009 9:57:52 AM

Today is the last day of my annual bad week.


Starts with the celebrating with the birthday of my sister that passed away. She would have been 40 this year, now a few days later, time to celebrate the birthday of my grandmother, who would have been 101 today.


She passed away two years ago short of being 99 years old. She was a strong woman to make it this far in her years, she gone threw a lot in her life, and I miss her cause she was like my second mother then a grandmother. She is missed she made me laugh, cry, smile, and lifted my spirits. Miss you much grandma!

8/26/2009 12:05:55 PM

Today is one of the saddest days in my life, something that I been bearing for the last seven years, mostly I can deal with the this new annual event in my life, but today is different it’s a bit more because it would have been different.


Today would have been the 40th birthday of my baby sister, it would have been a festive time but she is not with us today. Hard to deal with fact she been gone seven years now, it is getting easier but always sad when this day rolls around and especially this year when we would have been celebrating this year birthday.


Happy Birthday Sis, you would had enjoy being Forty years old, you are always remembered by me every day, more today then ever.

12/18/2008 5:06:55 PM
Its been a while since I actually did an entry into my journals.

Starting with my personal life, its had its ups and downs, the economy was a lot of the causes for the downs, but things are looking fair so far.

I been personally been avoiding my hobbies, just trying to get life back on stable grounds was much of my personal agenda this summer, but I think I should be able to pick up my hobbies once again with the new year coming.

So far my search has been interesting have made a few friends here, and had some interesting conversations. I also have ran into friends on here that I didn't know of in this lifestyle, it was nice to see and something that we can now openly share as well as with our friendship.

10/25/2007 5:18:09 PM



I've been searching for a way since the first time we met
To start your juices flowing and get your love nest wet
I finally found the fuel to make your love ignite
Oh Baby, I wanna get naughty with you tonight
Tonight I looked into your eyes and saw my world before me
I saw my future in your eyes. I saw forever in love.

Tonight baby let’s make love
Let’s do it like never before
Tonight baby let’s make love
Make you shiver to the core.

Wrap my arms around you and baby I take it slow
I want to enjoy your body next to mine
I want to feel your heart and your soul
Peel off my clothes piece by piece, and I’ll do the same to you
Kiss you slowly, kiss you deeply
Let our love shine out like true

When I get next to you my body starts to quiver
And I've got the touch to get you flowing like a river
My heart isn't the only muscle that you excite
Mmm, How would you like to get naughty with me tonight?

Baby I’ll give it to you slow and soft
Give it to you wild and free
Give it to you hard and fast
Force you down onto your knees

Help me to please you
Guide my hands, guide my body
Tell me exactly what to do
I want you to scream my name too.
So you don't misunderstand anything I've said
I want to go home with you and make love in your bed
I'll leave if there's another guy you want to invite
Or maybe you'd rather get naughty with me tonight

When it’s all over and ecstasy has came and gone
Let’s lay naked cuddled up tight
Let’s watch the sun rise in each other’s arms

Tonight baby let’s make love
Let’s do it like never before
Tonight baby let’s make love
Make you shiver to the core

Making love isn't something I want to do alone
And it isn't worth it if we do it on the phone
I have wanted you since I first had you in my sight
You're the only one I wanna get naughty with tonight

10/25/2007 1:35:14 PM
I wonder if anyone read these thing

9/15/2007 9:31:30 AM

Beg for Me


You lie under me, watching my face.

Feeling the tension in my arms and shoulders

As you draw your fingers down my spine.

Your back arches, pulling me deeper within you

And, as you breath catches in my throat, I whisper,

“Beg for me.”


You moan deep in your throat; your arms tremble.

I feel your fingers sink deeper in my back.

A steaming hard tension builds in your belly

As your eyes shimmer with need.

“Please,” you whisper up to me.

You draw your thighs up along mines, your head falling back, I whisper,

“Beg for me.”


Your nipples swell, rubbing against my chest.

A whimper almost falls from your lips.

“My Master,” you pray against the flesh of my throat.

“Daddy, please!”

Your pelvis tilts as I begin to slow withdrawal.

Your ankles lock to my lower thighs. I whisper,

“Beg for me.”


Your humid breath steams on my throat

As your nails dig into the flesh of my back.

A sharp intake of breath. “Master!”

My hips move hard and fast; my legs pull you into me again.

The wetness of your body reaches out to coat me.

My hips rock into you, carrying you to the brink. I whisper,

“Beg for me!”


“Please!” you gasp, lifting your eyes to mine.

“Oh, Daddy! Let me give you my release!”

The steaming coil inside you springs wide;

Your muscles clench, air catching in your lungs.

“Please, Daddy, now!”

My eyes stare into yours as I lose focus, concentrate.

My body slamming against yours, all control lost.

“I’m begging for you!”


A long, slow convulsion leaves you shuddering,

Tears threaten, and then flow. I clutch you down.

Your body trembles with the unfulfilled need of release.

An aftershock pulls the length of my body at you.

“Please!” you whisper as I take your face in my hands.

I taste your lips, your legs slide over mine as you tremble.

The rhythm of your breath slows mine. Your voice so soft,

“Begging for you.”


I hold you still and tight against and inside you.

Until pleading bleeds into soft kisses and caresses.

I feel so solid within you, in the shelter of my arms

And your thighs.

I place one hand on your throat, pushing your head back.

A shiver of delight begins my next trip to ecstasy

As I ponder my words, slipping them from my tongue

To the delicious salty skin of your chest.

“If you really wanted to cum for me tonight, you would

Beg for me.”

9/8/2007 4:20:28 AM
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

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