It's depressing to see how every day more and more vanilla ideas continue to dillute the ways of BDSM. With such words as "deal breakers" and girls thinking that they have an upper hand in either a D/s or M/s relationship dynamic. It seems that as each passing moment more and more ignorant and uninformed, uneducated and unthinking individuals seem to flock towards this lifestyle to give them some sense of purpose or even meaning to their lives.

Dominants spend time honing their skills at many aspects of Sadomasochism. From the art and science of the proper use and treatment of an implement such as a flogger or a whip to understanding the mind of a submissive or slave. There is a reason a submissive girl seeks there is a reason a slave searches. But don't think for one moment that just because you aren't in a relationship that you are in the right.

Too many jump into relationships to satisfy urges. Immediate needs that once sated, they walk away from. Instead of building worthwhile connections it seems the immediacy of satisfying one urge or some curiosity is what drives you to make rash decisions. Instead of pacing the union between each.

A dominant or Master are the ones who have the final say on whether or not a girl is worthy to take a collar or to reside within the boundaries of the rules they choose to impose on a girl. For a girl to think she has the final say so, is like telling a branch that the leaf is in control of staying on the branch.

There is nothing a girl offers that a Dominant can not have or take from a vanilla girl and turn to his advantage. The same thing goes for a Master. The only difference is that a submissive girl or even a slave girl understands that being in that relationship is a privilege. Not a right. Just like a girl can walk away from a relationship, so can the dominant. Just as a Master can take the privilege of ownership away from a slave.

Understand, that when it comes to control, power exchange and "kink" the flow of that is one way. The girls on this site that continue to come in from the cold of the vanilla paradigm seem to not be able to think. Not able to form more than just an immediate response. instead of understanding the breadth and scope of what it means to be free within the constraints of a power dynamic.

It isn't difficult to find a girl willing to do some of the things a dominnant enjoys, but at what cost? In a parallel where an aspiring dominant is mentored by a more experience dominant with years of experience in a form that one has spent time honing and training in to master it, to where it looks like child's play, to understanding the nuances of an interpersonal relationship with submissive/slave girl and why she needs to be treated a specific way. It seems that somewhere along the way something has been lost.

My collar is something that a girl must earn, not given. Just like restraints that a girl wears day in and day out are badges from me that say, yes your getting there, but still have a long way to go before you get to wear this. And why? Because she has to earn it. She has to understand that I am not just judging her in just one aspect or another. But as a whole.

Realize and accept that, when it comes to this. You can collar a submissive. You own a slave. And you don't have to trust me to understand that those two are worlds apart from each other in many respects. They may enjoy some of the same things when it comes to SM and BD. But don't get the wrong idea. Each relationship works on a different plane completely seperate from the other.

Just like there is a differnce between DISCIPLINE and PUNISHMENT. There is a DIFFERENCE between SUBMISSIVE and SLAVE. Just like there is a difference between DOMINANT and MASTER.

Don't delude yourselves when it comes to this. Because, if you do you could become a statistic or even worse in the hands of the wrong person. This is why, for me, since I can only speak for myself, I take time to make my rules. I take time to make my protocols. I take time to understand who it is that I have who wants to wear my collar and my restraints.

Some people find it amusing or laughable that I remind myself of who it is I have made room in my life for, but if I didn't remind myself of the level or responsibility I have to myself and the girl that would earn those from me, Then I would be no better than someone in the vanilla paradigm. And that to me is not a thought I care to entertain.

So if your looking for something generic or some flight of fancy that will not last, look else where. Because these things have more meaning than just a "one night stand."

It is for myself that I do this. It is for you that I remind myself of this. It is for us that I continue on the path of Mastery.