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| "If he is indeed wise he does not bid you
enter the house of his wisdom,
but rather leads you to the threshold
of your own mind."
~ Khalil Gibran, The Prophet
Are you ready for journey of surprising self-discovery, exciting exploration, and intensely erotic experiences? In return, you can expect the safety and security of a real friendship, the openness and honesty of a loving and nurturing relationship, and the fulfillment of unconditional love. Does it sound too good to be true? The only way you will ever know is to take the first step. It may seem risky, but life is full of risks. You must risk opening your heart if you ever expect to find someone that will know how to reach it. The first step on any journey may be the most fearful.
I am currently in a relationship with one woman, and I'm hoping to build a similarly loving and trusting relationship with another woman. I do not enter into relationships without open, honest communication and commitments on both sides.
I believe in antiquated notions like honor, respect, and the value of a man's word. I have high standards, but the standards I set for myself are even higher.
If you must label me, I am best described as a Daddy or Loving Dominant, tho with dash of sadism. Being a Daddy has nothing to do with age play or role playing.
For those women who feel they have a great deal of "experience" and insight to offer as a submissive, my first task will be to strip you completely of everything you believe you've learned.
You will not change me, so don't bother trying. You will not dictate the parameters of a relationship, nor will you criticize my behavior, those with whom I associate, nor will you insist upon or attempt to bargain with me to attempt to transform me into a person I am not. Finally, If you are unable to share your time with me, there really is no point in us talking. I love my angel and will never leave her or relegate her to a secondary position. If you're unable to understand this, more's to pity.
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As you fade in the distance from me,
Recall these things I left you as a legacy.
I left you long lingering kisses,
And loving eyes that would search yours still.
I left you the warm embraces of comfort
And the whispered conversations in the night.
I left you the better part of my wanting heart.
So, nothing is the legacy I leave to you. |
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I enjoy a woman ...
I enjoy her silky hair and the softness of her cheek.
I enjoy her warm lips and subtle lines,
The sparkle in her eyes and the curves of her hips and thighs.
I look deep into her eyes to discover what she seeks. |
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I do believe if another person speaks to me about this thing called a "lifestyle" I will be sick. What is presented on this web site has nothing at all to do with relationships, real issues, or self-discovery. Simply, it is about sex.
When most people use the term "lifestyle," I've learned that it means being active in local BDSM groups, attending munches, visiting play spaces or dungeons, and various other activities. The basis for all these are a common interest in BDSM. However, BDSM is not a lifestyle. BDSM is a label for any number of sexual activities, kinks, fetishes, or whatever you wish to call them. BDSM has nothing to do with committed, long-term relationships. It has been and always will be only about sex. For this reason, it's impossible to define BDSM as a lifestyle.
To live out fantasies or live a life according to particular fetishes is not a way of life but is, possibly, an unhealthy obsession. There is a great deal more to life than sex, so why miss out on the other 90% of life? It's the constant brainwashing about this "lifestyle" that is actually the source of so much confusion. There is far too much confusion over what "24/7", TPE relationships, discipline, and punishment should mean because they've been hijacked by "lifestylers" and made meaningless.
I will not fit neatly into your labels or how you think I must live my life. I will do as I see fit for myself, and my relationships will be structured according to the needs and desires of myself and my partner ... not yours.
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Assuming you're interested in something more than just some quick online fun, the following are some of the worst and most commonly used opening lines in chat room by horny net geeks.
* How are you?
* What are you wearing?
* I saw your profile: nice (insert body part(s) here).
* Are you new?
* What are you interested in?
* We're pretty close; we should meet.
* Would you like to talk somewhere quieter?
* I'm doing good, and horny too.
* I'm bored and horny, wanna play?
* Want to have some fun?
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If you're here to find play partners, friends with benefits, discrete relationships, quick hook-ups, or play on webcams ... forget it. |
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I have no interest in "taming," "molding," "training," or "breaking" a submissive. Such thinking, in my opinion, is ludicrous. It not only indicates a man's lack of confidence in his abilities and limitations of his self-awareness, but it also ddominant/submissive) relationship. A D/s relationship is a equal partnership. It is a journey shared by two people, who trust, respect, and love each other -- who bring to the relationship their own unique gifts and special talents. A submissive is no less important, valuable, or human because of her submission. A D/s relationship has the potential to be a deeply spiritual and profoundly intimate one. Yet, this opportunity is squandered if a man refuses to or incapable of selflessly giving himself to his partner and the relationship. The true measure of a man's suitability is his commitment to and understanding of what is required of him to earn one's unqualified trust, respect, and love. The beginning of any relationship is always a learning experience. Ideally, it is an joyful experience that continues throughout the wondrous journey. A submissive should possess a desire to find a man who she can unconditionally trust, respect, and love, and with whom she wishes to grow intellectually and spiritually, while sharing their journey. She should have an active imagination, enjoy being creative, and a desire to accomplish the goals she has set for herself. Furthermore, she should be caring, thoughtful, open, sincere, and have a curious mind. She is comfortable in her knowledge of her submissive nature. Yet, she will not see submission as merely a role to play (in the bedroom) but an essential part of who she is. She will be motivated a strong need to discover and learn about her true nature. The right man will ... engage her mind to earn her respect ... be attentive and honorable to win her trust ... listen to her heart to capture her love ... touch her soul to win her submission. Begin the journey into light: a self-knowledge providing enlightenment and wisdom. It is a light that offers sustenance, permits growth, and also provides warmth.
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You must be honest with me and with yourself. You must come to me open, willing, ready ... needing ... to embrace who you are. I will touch your heart and soul, and I will show you the depths of unconditional love. I will help you learn to accept your wants, needs, and desires ... even treasure them. This is not about exploring the darkness. This is a journey of self-exploration and learning to love in a way you have never before experienced. However, you will fail on this journey if you cannot be honest with yourself. You will fail if, when confronting your fears, needs, desires, you turn and run from them. You may succeed if you allow me a place at your side: to comfort, guide, and support you on this journey. The journey is and will be difficult. It is a long journey. The magic is in the journey not the destination. What is it you have to offer me if we choose to take this journey?
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After a number of years on this site, it seems that collarme.com isn't where I should be. Where I should be, I still have figured that out. However, I've yet to read a profile that leads me to believe that anyone understands that it takes time to get to know someone, that relationships require effort, and that the real magic that can be found in a TPE has nothing to do with BDSM, kinks, munches, dungeons, or clubs. Furthermore, those I have contacted over the years have been unable to exhibit even the decency or common courtesy to respond to my emails. When I've written, I've taken the time to compose a thoughtful expression of my interest. Apparently, that's not something that is appreciated here.
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Well, I decided to take one last chance and hope for the best. It didn't surprise that a month later I've never received a response. It seems the women's profiles I'm reading are full of impossible expectations, or lack of understanding, or attempts to fulfill a fantasies. Since I refuse to to compete with fantasies and will not pursue a woman to meet her criteria of what she thinks I should be, I suppose this is just the wrong place to be.
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Well, I do think it's finally time to put an end to all the charades. As far as I can tell, it's impossible for anyone to even exercise common decency and respond to an email. As I look through the profiles, I know now that it's a rare woman who even understands what I've written in my profile. For too many, this is all about sex or being controlled by abusive, pathological, psychotic, controlling, domineering men. I don't have the time or energy anymore to set people straight. The possibilities are wonderful, and it's disappointing that we can't find someone with whom we can can this. If you do come across this profile and would like to talk, I will continue to be notified about emails I received. Other than that, I leave behind the sick, sad games people try to pass off as real life.
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Does anyone on this site actually communicate? I don't mean through chat or the forums. I've been here something like three or four years. In that time, I believe I've received one response to the three dozen people I've emailed (which is completely rude, but another topic). For those near me, if you check your admirers you might find I have you hotlisted. This means I have contacted you, may contact you, or I'm waiting to see if you notice and may send me a quick note as to whether or not you may be interested.
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For those of you who like to use color fonts and/or backgrounds. Please ... please, take a moment and make sure the combinations are readable. Dark purple background and black text is pointless; it's completely unreadable. Dark background means light font and vice versa.
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Once again, I've been forced to learn a lesson. Even those I think understand me and my philosophy can turn out to be what they are not. What we want is to be able to share our love with another. It's not complicated except when the one being considered is incapable of being honest with herself.
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While I'm here, I suppose I'll just mention one of my pet peeves. If you can't take the time to write something about how you feel concerning your lifestyle choice, about yourself, or about what you're looking for, I can guarantee that I will give that profile no more attention than it takes to move on to the next profile.
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Well, we just spent the better part of an afternoon composing emails to a few women who we thought felt as we do and are interested in relationships. After three days, I'm very disappointed that not one of them even responded to say "Thanks, but no thanks." I've been around long enough to know this is typical, but i still find it extremely rude to ignore responding when someone has obviously taken the time and effort to communicate thoughtfully.
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With very few responses so far, I'm assuming the majority of people are only interested in sexual encounters and not taking the time and effort actually to develop relationships. Whether a relationship begins with sexual attraction or shared interests, there has to be more than sex to sustain a relationship. On the other hand, I suppose it's possible those indicating an interest in meeting a couple aren't completely serious.
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Perhaps the most important part of any conversation is listening. Only by listening can one come to understand another's point of view. We want to hear about what makes you tick and the things you enjoy doing (besides sex).
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As I wrote in the profile, my babygirl and I are interested in finding a woman with whom we might spend some time, share some laughs, and perhaps develop a friendship (or more). If you might be interested but would rather chat with her, please just send an IM nick or email where she might contact you. We do look forward to hearing from some of you.
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| Age: 24 |
| Iowa city,
Iowa |
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